Narcisse Noir

I have recently had the pleasure of trying both the current eau de toilette and the vintage parfum extrait of Caron, Narcisse Noir (Caron 1911).  And, since I forgot to post on Saturday, here’s a combination review for both.

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The eau de toilette opens with a mixture of orange flower and narcissus in sharp but genteel assertion, reminiscent of a tart Earl Grey.  At the heart, fruity jasmine blossoms in tandem with a creamy, translucent rose, while a warm but very soapy background quietly sets the stage.

Narcisse Noir in the current edt is breezy, nostalgic, sweet, moving and tremendously pretty.  In fact, the late 19th Century, early 20th Century ideal of femininity, the Gibson Girl, would certainly have worn this…

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Now, vintage extrait…  well…  it’s mesmerizing.  It’s smoky, luscious, sexy and overwhelming beautiful.  A wild, totally untamed but very sweet floral bouquet blossoms alongside a clear and refined, yet audaciously romantic vetyver, musk and sandalwood. And yet, it somehow manages to be clean and almost soapy like the current edt in a way very similar to vintage Estee Lauder Private Collection.  It’s basically an old fashioned, genuine and sensuous romance in olfactory form…

I’m smitten by Narcisse Noir.  It’s probably my second favorite fragrance ever to Chanel No. 22.  Even above Shalimar…  And that’s saying something my dears.

Top notes: African orange flower and narcissus.  Middle notes: jasmine, orange and tincture of rose.  Base notes: vetyver, musk and sandalwood.

So, I haven’t written anything personal for a long time…  Sorry about that.  My life has been crazy.

Our son was diagnosed with something very serious and scary, but he’s being treated and we’re working on getting him well.  He’s such a brave, fun, kind and strong little person.

I’m currently in the process of doing my first compilation/rewrite of the novel I’ve been working on for a over year.  And every time I start writing or rewriting the portion I’m at right now I think about a guy I dated while I was seeing my husband…

Well, there were two guys I dated actually.  One of them was the son of a customer at the coffee shop I worked at and the other was a guy I met while riding on the bus…

The son of the guy at the coffee shop (I’ll call him Steve) was a really nice guy.  He was sweet, caring and sensitive.  He was an artist.  He was kind…  And yet we just didn’t click much at all, although he was still interested in me…  But we just weren’t compatible.

The other guy was smooth,  intelligent, very handsome and very passionate.

Looking back at it…  and this is where I feel like shit…  I often wonder if I missed out on and messed up a good match, if he was just a masterful, manipulative jerk…  or I don’t know what.  It was only a mediocre match and I’m not missing anything much?

He seemed to be really, genuinely interested in me for a while, but then things changed. Now, that could seem like a pretty clear emotional narrative for someone who was just getting something from me and then walking away… but it’s not that simple…

See, I was totally emotionally in chaos because of the crap going on with my husband, then guy I was “seeing” (he was seeing seven other people,  refused to commit to me but wouldn’t let me go, and it’s complicated…  and was extremely painful…  and I’ve discussed it before.).  I wasn’t fully emotionally present on my dates with this guy (I’ll call him Frank).  And I suspect it’s possible that Frank sensed there was someone else I was dating or at the very least sensed my emotional distance.

Oh and, why, you may ask was I dating all these people at the same time?  Well, I’m not proud to say so, but it was because my husband thought it was a good idea to date a lot of people all at once.  Crazy.  I know (again, I discussed this before)…   And after he told me he didn’t care if I saw other guys and thought I should, these two lovely men came along. He now regrets his old philosophy (as I’ve said before) and the impact it had on both of us in different ways, but at the time I was so impressed with him and he was so sure of himself that it all seemed wise and worldly.   And, most importantly, I thought I was just a naive, inexperienced girl so I didn’t trust myself enough to listen to my better judgement. I thought I was very uncool in regard to romance and needed to wise-up and stop being so emotional, idealistic, old-fashioned, romantic and…  tender.  I’d often like to go back and thoroughly shake myself silly for believing that utter bullshit my husband would say.

And…  I really really liked Frank, but I never gave myself a chance to truly open up to him or fully engage in that relationship  even though we were physically involved. I never really let him in…  and I think that it’s possible that that might have hurt him or really pissed him off if he sensed it.   I was one numb, sad, tired and very confused lady.

He totally blew me off eventually and when I tried to see him again he responded in a short, heartless text that we didn’t have any chemistry…  And again, I often wonder if that was his way of being crass, cold and very common or if he genuinely thought that.  And if so, I worry it was because of my gobsmacked, messed-up emotional state.  Sadly, I think we had an enormous amount of chemistry…  and if we did, not being able to fully experience that with him is one of the biggest regrets of my life.  He was great.  Or, at least, I thought he was great…

I even tried to Facebook friend him once out of a bit of curiosity and an enormous sentimental longing to hold on to something that never was but maybe could have been… He never read the message for whatever reason and I eventually left Facebook entirely.

And I suppose, if he was incapable of seeing my heart in the midst of the chaos, or trying hard enough to find me that he likely wasn’t that interested.  And, I know if someone isn’t interested that the stupidest thing to do is to try to convince them otherwise or hold on to them in any way.  At least, that’s true for me.  Often, I think, people aren’t interested not because of a lack or flaw on anyone’s part, but because the people in question are really just not meant to be together.  But I still sadly wonder…

Anyway, I’ve been writing a lot lately and it feels good to have at least some semblance of a book on paper.  And looking back at that very painful and messy time in my life for the purpose of creative writing is actually really healing…

Thanks for reading.

 

 

2 thoughts on “Narcisse Noir

  1. Hi Kerrie. I wanted to let you know that some of your posts have been going to a dead “404” link, including the one you sent today (not the one I’m attaching a coment to). The one today–Decadence goes to a dead link. Beth

    • Thank you, Beth! I’m sorry I’m responding to this helpful comment so late. I’m sorry my website has been having this glitch and thank you for telling me about it! I’ll do my best to fix it… 😬☺️

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