…In The Morning

So, apparently people read my blog post from last night and came to some strange conclusions.  One person thinks I’m trying to marry Mark’s older brother (who doesn’t exist).   Someone else thought I was suicidal.  Another person thought I couldn’t have been drunk in reality if I was able to write an entire post and so they hypothesized that I was just trying to get attention by claiming I was drunk…  And apparently someone else thinks I’m just crazy and/or messed-up…  and told me today that they read my blog to feel better about themselves and their “more traditional life choices.”

Let me clear a few things up.  First, Mark does not have an older brother (he has a younger brother but I’m not attempting to marry him either).  He has never had an older brother.  And if he did have an older brother, I would not be trying to marry his older brother because I’m already married to Mark and given how I was raised and the culture in which I live that would be too weird for me (if it isn’t for you, I’m not judging).  I suppose, just to clarify, I could see a situation where if a man died (and no Mark hasn’t died) some people might marry someone else in the man’s family, but that’s a different situation.  But regardless, I don’t want to marry anyone from his family…  Ever.   I’m sure many of them are lovely people, but I don’t want that…

Thankfully, I’m not suicidal and I wasn’t last night.  And, frankly, the person who suggested this seems to be more intent on trying to find something wrong with me than actually be helpful so just to be more clear let me say that if I ever was suicidal I sure as hell wouldn’t call you.   Sorry.  I was drunk and therefore feeling more open and blunt than usual (and loving it), but I thought I was actually quite level in my tone.  I never really “lose it.”   I can be intense and serious but that’s not the same thing as falling apart.   Sometimes I wish I could “fall apart” more under normal strain actually…  but I don’t.   I get tired but I don’t “fall apart.”   And furthermore, when I’m drunk unless you study me intently or I tell you I’m intoxicated, you’re unlikely to know (not that I can’t tell though).  I’m the sort of person who never becomes obviously drunk to others…

And yes, I was drunk.  No, I’m not advocating going out and drinking.  I don’t drink that often and I don’t think getting drunk is necessarily a good thing.  But, I’m not going to lie and say that I didn’t enjoy it…   I did.   But, thankfully, I enjoy being sober more…  I just wish I could find a way to, as I put it in my last post, quiet myself enough to be more honest when I’m sober (I already am a pretty sincere person though)…

Lastly, if you read my blog just to feel better about yourself…  I don’t give much of a damn.   Sorry if you were hoping to illicit more of a reaction from me by telling me that…



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