It’s Done…

So…  I’m pretty sure I’ve got at least a fair idea what Mr. Blue’s intentions were as of today and it’s now completely over.   I’m fairly certain he was just looking for a woman to make a fool of and given my sweetness, curiosity and earnestness I was as good a bet as anyone.  And I know there are many men like him…  But there are at least as many (if not more) who are sincerely not like that too.  There are women I’d never be even friends with and some I have a lot of respect for.  It’s not just a “man thing” and I think turning it into that risks giving “catty” men (like Donald Trump) more power or originality than they deserve.

That’s the one thing that has really bothered me about the gender discussion lately in America.  I mean sure, men are generally more physically powerful than women perhaps and given their privileges in society they are also in a position (in some respects) of more authority but…  I don’t believe that they are more inherently evil or awful in any way than women.  People are just people.  You know?

Furthermore, I don’t think people in power are more inherently “evil” either.  I think some might like that myth because it’s kind of glamorous or satisfying in some people’s imaginations, but I don’t know that it actually stands to real scrutiny.  I think there are people of all sorts evenly spread about…  Perhaps the one caveat to this is that when you have more resources you can indulge your every whim to a greater degree.  So, if you’re someone who likes pot you might smoke more pot, etc.  *shrugs*

But…  lets go with this “rich people are all evil” trope for a second.  I enjoy analyzing this one…

I have long been of the suspicion that people who think “rich people” are mostly sleazy, sex obsessed perverts or vicious narcissists with really pretty shoes are generally those who grew up outside of real wealth.  Sorry.  Just being honest…

But it makes sense.  The “nice people” aren’t the ones who look beneath them for someone to bother.  People who are anxious about their status (most often new money) or who simply are just mean are the ones who try the hardest to interact with those they think are below them.

I learned this when I was growing up in an affluent suburb in Minnesota.   I had quite a few teachers in high school honors, etc. classes who came from rather nice families and they were well educated, kind and generally tolerant.  They were also the best teachers.  And there were teachers (one second grade teacher in particular) who were clearly obsessed with befriending the “cool kids” and somehow breaking into the “well bred” crowd in life and they were the worst teachers and the rudest people in general.

My family is complicated socially speaking.  I refuse to divulge how much money or prestige any one person or people have (or have had) because that’s degrading and utterly ridiculous but suffice it to say that my immediate family was probably the poorest in our extended family overall.  My parents were the exception among their relatives.  Not the rule.  They could have chosen careers that “made money” but they didn’t.  They were hippies…  Remember?

Anyway, I really did have a unique view of issues of class.  In one regard, I was given some social skills that helped me fit in with “my betters” and yet what we actually had made me rather vulnerable to bullies who wanted someone to humiliate to feel better about themselves.  As I wrote, my second grade teacher was a perfect example.  She once had all the students in class talk about how much money their families had or didn’t as part of some “special in-class assignment” and she used this information to arrange us in her mind in order of importance.

No, Mr. Blue (formally Handsome) was not the person I had hoped he was.  I’m glad we never had a long in person conversation.  Best case scenario, if he was at all sincere (and he wasn’t of course) it probably would have been awkward for both us for different reasons.  I don’t think either of us really had a really good understanding of each other (another reason I refuse to ever even attempt romance over the internet again)…

I hope Mr. Blue forgets about me entirely.  I think that would be best…  Although of course I wish him well regardless of how mean and silly he has been.

How is that?  Is this blog post “bitchy” enough?  I hope?   (please note sarcasm in case it escapes you *rolling eyes*)

…Unless I’m completely wrong about him.  But in that case, I don’t think there’s any way I’ll know for certain if he doesn’t contact me.

More later.


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