Angry…

I’m angry today.

I’m angry that I’m fighting a cold after just recovering from the stomach flu. I’m angry I’m so tired when there’s so much to do today… And I’m angry that I lost about ten followers nearly instantly on Instagram after sharing about my family again. <rolling eyes> And I tend to think there was a connection… It’s not a big deal but I’m getting tired of this sort of thing. I even went private to avoid a bit of this…

I mean truly, it’s a personal gallery now at the very least and frankly I get bored just reading about perfumes in my feed constantly… Don’t others? I love perfume but it’s not the only thing going on in my life. I doubt it is in their life either… Don’t they ever drink tea? Or go on a walk? Maybe read something? And can’t there be some combination of both?

<Sigh>

Not that devoting your gallery to only perfume is bad. Not at all!! It’s just…I can’t believe I’m boring them that much with a post every couple days (or less often) about my personal life?! I try to post enough perfume to keep those folks interested and entertained? Maybe it is that boring though… <thinking>

<sigh>

But I have a weird feeling a few of them just hate what I shared? I’m bragging? <sigh> Well…if you come from a family that has some aspect…really anything…nice about it…and you talk about your family you’re bound to “brag” about something? Right?

Like… I’ll borrow from the life of a young lady I was friends with in high school and still keep in contact with: Her mother was a stay-at-home-mom, but she was socially involved in her community, and she once had a lovely job in fashion. Her father was an executive. Her sister went to the most expensive and prestigious prep school in the state and then entered the world of high fashion in New York City… And her extended family lives in the Hamptons. Her house in high school was very large with a lake in back (they had a boat), both a formal and casual dining room, sunroom, basement gymnasium, six or seven bedrooms, office, grand staircase, two family/media rooms, parlor, kitchen…etc. and her parents promptly sold it when she graduated from high school so they could travel the world and buy a property in a very nice part of Florida where it’s warmer. First stop was India though for a lovely holiday… (they traveled internationally at least once a year) What the heck was she supposed to say about herself that wouldn’t sound like bragging to anyone but those of a similar background…or better…or who were TRULY raised not to judge people on such things but to accept them first as individuals?!?!? Her father once gave her a nice Lexus suv in her teens for voting. <smile> But really, first and foremost, she was a nice young lady and good friend.

I’m sure someone is reading this saying, “But that was your friend. Not yooouuu…”

<roll eyes>

Yes!!! I KNOW THAT!

<sigh and cry a little out of exasperation>

But my dear readers…my point is that it’s almost impossible not to brag if there’s anything “braggy” about you or your family and you’re telling about yourself. Right?

Or…what about another friend I had who’s mother was a single parent but who had an uncle who was a very famous professional baseball player in the 1980’s and 90’s (I will not name him). She casually mentioned it once and he even picked her up from school one time (it was kind of exciting), but if you had met her and she didn’t mention her uncle people might assume she was “a young girl from a total nobody family” because her mother was trying to do her best to raise her alone and at times it seemed challenging. But…considering her uncle and other things I’m not mentioning that wouldn’t have been entirely accurate. What was she supposed to share? Was she supposed to lead with the bit about her uncle?

People have got to learn to be more comfortable with whoever the heck they are and learn to cherish their gifts, blessings, accomplishments and etc. more. MORE not less… And not in some fake puffed up way either. They have to learn to value themselves… Because that’s the best way to deal with jealousy, hatred or overall insecurity – to truly, truly love yourself in a healthy way. Take an honest (not negative or falsely positive) assessment of who you are, how you fit in the world, and then learn to develop a taste for it… People are all a heck of a lot more special and fascinating than they likely realize. Everyone has some magic about them… Let other people be magical and be magical yourself in your own way.

Perfume lovers should recognize this. Not everyone is Chanel No. 5. I’m not!! I’m the “quieter little brunette sister” fragrance according to some descriptions (hahaha). But…if that’s me then so be it!! I ADORE No. 22 and it suits me like a glove. And I’d rather be comfortable and at peace than the top banana of classic Chanels.

Not everyone is a Francis Kurkdjian creation either… I’m certainly not. And to be honest I’m not that much of a personal fan of those fragrances, although I appreciate them! But if you are a Grand Soir while I cannot easily relate I can certainly see your fabulousness. Likewise, not everyone can be a vintage Guerlain or a vintage Dior or…something by Clive Christian. Or…any other niche, Chanel, Coty… (what’s wrong with being an original Coty as it was intended to smell)…or maybe a Balmain or maybe something by Dusita?

My point is that it’s sad that people can’t just let people be who they are without freaking out about it and comparing themselves. Or insulting people. Or lying. Or etc.

If you’re truly a very rare or exclusive Guerlain you have nothing to be ashamed of. If you’re honestly a classic Elizabeth Arden you have nothing to be ashamed of. I personally love them both and actually can’t imagine how they could replace each other… They’re both equally valuable (although one costs more) in their own way. They’re just different.

And we’ll all die one day. When we’re laying there rotting, if we have souls and can see beyond do you think we’ll be so concerned about these things?! Lord in Heaven I hope not.

In the meantime, I refuse to entirely shut up about what’s on my mind about my family or myself. There’s a heck of a lot I don’t share. Not because I’m hiding something but because I don’t want to upset people and lose all of my followers except for about ten or twenty… (haha) It’s hard to find a balance.

Whatever.

p.s. I still don’t generally take unfollowing me personally. I just feel frustrated because in some cases it seems to be for a semi personal reason and I’m perplexed by how to best handle it.