The Girl

Well…I really will return to my reviews but I guess I’ve been in the mood to write something else. Sorry…

Someone seemed to be wondering today what the “other woman” in my previous posts was like. You know who you are… They seemed intrigued to find out what sort of young lady my ex’s now wife was (and possibly is).

Let’s see if I can describe her well enough.

I guess we can start with shallow matters and then go from there. So, to begin with, she was quite petite. I was actually about the same height as my ex. and when I wore heels I was taller than him. They often say that it bothers men in heterosexual relationships to be shorter or too equal to their girlfriend or wife in height, and honestly, I can’t help but think he did appreciate how this young lady was obviously shorter than him.

She was fairly average looks-wise overall, to be brutally honest. But she did have nice, clear skin that was a pale color and bright blue/green eyes that complemented her truly thick, red hair well. And her hair was long and lustrous.

I recall her having a somewhat Avril Lavigne circa early 2000’s aesthetic to her style. But it was Avril Lavigne as a red-headed, bubbly cheerleader.

She was very slim. And of course, that just made her seem all the more petite.

She was sassy, a little brash, and seemingly into guys in general and going on dates. She liked to have fun. And I think she had a special thing for the guys who were considered “super smart” on campus. One of my very good guy friends confided in me that she had been somewhat aggressively after him too and he had an iq in the 160’s. Haha… Seriously though, I think a high iq was a powerful aphrodisiac for her.

She was…sweet…but also very clever and street smart, and not entirely in a good way necessarily. While I was dating my ex she “befriended” me and peppered me with questions about my relationship that at the time seemed to be coming from a caring friend. So of course I told her too much because I was under the impression she was asking for kind reasons. And I’m sure that she appreciated that information because it was likely all very useful. Ha!

She…seemed a bit insecure. But I never got the sense that she let that hold her back from going after whatever it was she wanted. And I’m sure that my ex loved that about her. I had a tendency to analyze and ponder (still do) when I had a big decision or a problem. I wasn’t one to put myself out into the fray until I was sure it was right, and I think she tended to be more, “shoot from the hip” and “full speed ahead” in her ways. I’m just more reserved… And he definitely preferred her manner. I think he saw it – her push to action and occasional craftiness – as part of a brilliant sort of confidence.

What else? I think she liked beer (although nothing too “snobby”). She was the kind of person who likely ate pizza passionately (and not in a foodie way). And I cannot imagine her enjoying a g&t as a habit, a too complicated glass of red wine or even sipping champagne on a “non occasion.” People would say she was very “down to earth” here in the US, I think. And I think he loved that about her too – her “down to earth quality.” Maybe in part because he was a lot like that. For example, he really enjoyed pretzels. There was often a bag nearby. And he was also into amusement parks with all their attractions.

No, they fit together well. And actually, I would have been a lot less hurt and at least somewhat understanding if he had just been honest with me and told me he was falling for her instead of hiding it. I would have felt more respected as a person. But, oh well… I have actually forgiven him.

…I think she was also less of a serious person (or you could say deep). In the instances where I would argue against Friedman and make him mad she likely looked at him admiringly and just listened. And it wasn’t in a fake way either. I suspect she just agreed with most of his views or was so in awe of him that she didn’t bother to question him intellectually. And I think he was the kind of guy who wanted that (and no not all men actually like or respect that sort of adoration, of course).

Actually, I look back at it and wonder. I wonder why I didn’t break-up with him first. They really were soo perfect together. And when they kept hanging out…I should have known to step aside. I mean, I saw their relationship coming (I even told him she was interested based on how he described their outings)… But I should have done one better and just left the relationship. *sigh*

But anyway, that’s a bit of who she was.