Some people may be open-minded and honest enough to understand us. Even just a bit. They might clash with you or not on some things, but at heart they are possibly capable of understanding. One hopes…
And then there are those who maybe consider the idea of being real or open enough to understand those who are different than them but simply can’t be. Or maybe decide not to be. You can explain everything to them using science, math, logic, the arts and history and yet they…find it all too “baffling”. Too “peculiar” or “unusual”. “Strange”. “Unbelievable”. Or so they claim. It goes beyond a lack of enough open communication. You might talk to them for hours and they still wouldn’t truly understand something. Become otherwise good friends perhaps… But they just don’t quite seem to…want to understand.
“How can you possibly be really named Barb Wire? Who in the world would name their child that?!” a man named Franklin Roberts might scoff at the poor someone actually named Barb Wire…as Frank at least pretends to consider Barbie a fool on occasion. Or maybe just does consider her a fool? A fool for trying to trick him perhaps in this particular case. How? Well he’s quite sure there was a trick involving Ms. Wire coming up with odd stories about being given a weird name at birth.
“But my parents really named me that! See, my name is in the phone book and it’s on my first driver’s license.” Barb insists and holds up a phone book from the 90’s for evidence. (The year this story takes place in is in the present year of this post. 2020. By the way.)
But…no. Franklin has made himself seemingly impossible to convince. Perhaps, however, what he really is looking for is a professionally certified birth certificate with the name Barbara Jane Wire (Barb Wire) written on it. Although, he still might insist that even given nickname customs of shortening Barbara to Barb, her name really wasn’t officially, truly, obviously Barb Wire. It was Barbara from birth officially. He might even argue if he felt so compelled that she could have and should have fought her parents on being called Barb as they insisted she be called to shorten the name they (intentionally and fully consciously) gave her.
“Gosh,” the Barb Wire doubter thinks to himself in a private moment of honest reflection, “…if her name really is Barb Wire then she must have had a rough time being bullied growing up with a name like that. I shouldn’t have made those jokes about her being ‘wiry’.” *he laughs* “I was making a jerk of myself in that case and I wasn’t really trying to. Poor thing. …But I don’t trust her. No. She always made me feel more insecure than I already feel with her endless puns. *scoff* I love puns! And her story that she learned them in childhood due to her given name? Childhood trauma surrounding her name, I guess? Well, it’s all very uncomfortable. More likely a crazy story about something as silly as puns to cover for her own massive insecurities. I love puns. Not her.
It must have been on purpose! The way she made puns around me and I felt so…beneath her. Nobody could accidentally do something like that. No. She’s terrible. She knew I’ve always wanted to make a good pun but it’s never come easily. I have to think about them for hours sometimes beforehand. I told her that! In confidence. Jerk!
No, she’s probably just lying and insecure about her real given name. I bet! It’s probably something dull and common.
But truly, using her weird ability to make puns to hurt me. To think of it! Someone who loves puns like myself. Struggles to make them!” *shaking head* “And telling me in a manipulative way that illicits my sympathy too. Sick. Who would be cruel enough to name their child Barb Wire?! Fake trauma!” *rolling eyes* “Maybe she would name a child that. Barb Wire. The bloody idiot. Probably.” *scornful laugh* “Terrible person. Terrible.” *shaking head*
…No, but back in reality Barb might actually like to change her name or find a name a kind and merciful uncle wanted to name her. If she even has a kind uncle who had raised objections about her name at birth, that is. Maybe he suggested Sarah or Rose? Isabelle or Caroline might have been favorites as well.
And so she does actually. Change her name. But no matter. She’s still “weird Barb Wire who named herself that” to at least a person or two. Including Mr. Franklin Roberts who insisted we don’t know to this day what stupid-Barb-Wire’s real name is. If cornered with old phone books (the ones with her name in them) a couple of other doubters take a different defense of themselves than Franklin Roberts and claim they really did care about poor Wire’s feelings to a point, but it was just impossible to know it wasn’t Ms. Wire’s fault she had such an utterly ridiculous name. They heard Franklin going on about her once and, more importantly, they just couldn’t believe any human being would name their child Barb Wire. *they roll their eyes* No, that’s something you do to yourself to get attention when you grow-up, they claim. It’s like a gimmicky, strange stage name?
But..in reality while slightly unusual it wasn’t quite that…unlikely. They just felt too awkward. Too…uncomfortable thinking about it? It was too complicated! Or maybe they were bothered by her uncanny ability to make a wickedly clever pun. A glib joke! …But again, in reality, people do sometimes give their children difficult names to manage. …And sometimes people don’t realize how they’re triggering other people because it’s almost impossible for them not to and still be themselves. Some triggers are caused by evil and others are innocent. In this case, Barb (innocently) likes making puns. It’s also how she copes and coped with being made fun of as a child named Barbara J. Wire. Barb Wire. She saw the silver-lining in her pain. She learned how to distinguish a good pun from a not so great pun by hearing them everyday, at her expense, over and over again for years… Hopefully Ms. Wire won’t realize she’s triggering people who are then attacking (and rejecting) her cruelly at times without explanation and feel so hurt, pushed around and misunderstood that after a while she weaponizes her realization… Starts showing off her amazing ability to make a superior pun to irritate and intentionally trigger those who have decided she’s “a fool”. Who refuse to understand considering that the truth is less than simple and is also somewhat unpleasant all around…considering. For them too in a way, because all they seemingly wanted in life was to make a good pun and- Well… Anyway, that would be a mistake.
– Ha! Can you imagine being so stupid and as to name yourself Barb Wire as an adult?! Just to get attention? And then to decide to blame your parents?!
-But I heard she renamed herself Isabelle now? That’s kind of pretty.
-No! She’s too stupid to think of a name like Isabelle herself. She’d only name herself something dumb like Barb Wire. She named herself. She really did. I’m sure of it! To get attention. Total fraud. Loser!
-I’d bet so. Sure. What an idiot! Sure!