Wendy Williams

I have a feeling I wouldn’t have gotten along with Wendy Williams. I truly admire her in a way, but I have a strong suspicion our personalities would have clashed. People like her often expect me to be willing to argue with them. They’re disappointed when I’m not more confrontational, high-strung or aggressive even though I’m supposedly “intense.”

But…I’m in shock reading about what has happened to her. It’s the last thing I would have expected. It’s…truly stunning. So much more bizarre than is being discussed.

…I mean…really. What in the world happened to her?!

Her sudden demise (?) feels…like a clue to other mysteries of the world. *laugh* Sound like hyperbole? …Well…yeah but think about how vivid and potent and in control she always was. A sudden serious stroke I’d be less shocked by. A diagnosis of cancer also would “make sense.” But…this feels…almost creepy. Like, it’s…a crack. Not in “the matrix” as popularized by Tik Tok, but more in “the narrative.” “The narrative” being the mindset people are supposed to be in in society… It’s a flaw. It feels far too off to fit.

I remember similar “cracks” showing-up in the early to late 1990’s. Like…there would be an interview on a late night tv show and some celebrity would seem really different than one expected. Not as in Madonna different but more or less their public persona was just so far off from the apparent reality of who they were or are. …And in retrospect all of those weird anomalies…added up to 9/11. Yes. 9/11. Because I grew-up hearing that America had never been attacked on its own soil. That we were sort of invincible in that way or something… That Pearl Harbor was just this absurd exception. And something like 9/11 felt…possible to me as I was fascinated by politics and there actually had been warnings of possible terrorist attacks in US for years…but also so unlikely. So genuinely unlikely.

But something about the “moments of oddity” in the 1990’s…felt like hints. Like this. Hints that not all was as it seemed. On top, at least. That things weren’t…”under control.” That the world was far harsher and more chaotic and untamed than we were starting to believe. Because in the 1980’s and 1990’s things really did feel so bizarrely settled. So peaceful. So…”post.”

I mean, sure, this is a woman who has struggled. Yet, it still feels really weird. And what does it mean?

I think it means that things are changing less than you’d think. I think it means that some conspiracy theories are nonsense…but that others simply aren’t. I think it means that climate change probably is both infinitely more serious than we realize and yet also surprisingly solvable? …I think it means that people with seemingly iron-clad public personas are sometimes totally lying somehow. And not necessarily how you’d expect. And is it maybe the people who also feel…secretly a bit evil? Not like outright evil evil…but…just not quite entirely positive somehow. (On a personal level I think about my observations about Lem and Jack. Jack oddly reminds me of Wendy Williams a bit.)

Yes. This all might sound like a bunch of ridiculous reaches but… *shrug*

I think someone like Nancy Pelosi vigilantly hides her cracks. Obsessively maybe even. (She reminds me of Richard Nixon at times, actually.) But…Wendy was too big of a personality or was it that she was less powerful and less wealthy and less likely to have the millions and millions and millions to control her every possible angle? Lots of people need Nancy Pelosi to never crumble. At all. Wendy Williams was more independent in a way but also is far less protected.

I just wonder what this means about the literal health of people “in charge.” Not like…they’re already dead as conspiracy theories go…but more like they’re suffering or falling apart in ways we don’t see. As in, how close to death or serious illness are people who we assume are “fine” because they seem “fine?” Or is it even that? Maybe not. Maybe it’s just…unsettling and it means there’s some other bigger shock coming down the pipeline, so to speak.

What is it? It feels really odd. Regardless, golly. I wish her the best.