Rousseau

One of the most memorable experiences of my entire life has become my visit to Manhattan in the early 2000’s.

It wasn’t normal. It was a profound visit. And although that professor left feeling like she’d made little progress intellectually in the existences of her students en masse…I was certainly an exception. And if my life makes any difference in the universe, especially to God…she had hardly wasted her time.

“Something’s wrong with my soul…”

If the Illuminati exists the hateful, badly raised, only mildly wealthy at best, aspiring upper-middle class…evil hearted individual who decided to “notice me” online years ago was…exactly that. And Jack agrees with this assessment. Wholeheartedly.

Merely mildly…wealthy? Why, yes. …Mere wealth.

*Cue the sexy music* because we think “sex” and money are inherently intertwined in our “Western Society” (as we label it). And then comes…*cough* drugs. Because…drugs, sex and rock and roll??? *eye-roll* (note sarcasm and quotation marks in the following sentences of this paragraph) We are indeed sooo sophisticated… Especially nowadays with the suffocating domination of “sex” and “drugs” and “rock and roll.”

*smile*

And therein lies the problem.

Do you see it? Is it too narcissistically upsetting? Aww!

“Sex, drugs & rock and roll” are not all inherently intertwined outside of us. It appears so…for a reason. But that’s an illusion. In my opinion. Even this side of Paradise… The connection between all of them is in us. As humans. The forces outside of us that control those pieces of human existence…aren’t necessarily inherently intertwined. I don’t think…anyway.

We are the human species. That’s not just a saying.

Why do humans love money? There are many evil reasons. And then there are good reasons too… And reasons that are based on other people’s evil.

Six million Dollars (on their own) might seem like a lot to someone who grew-up in a poor family with middle-class roots. A virtually unfathomable mountain of money… But, it’s not. Not at all. At…all. *sad scoff* If food is money it’s peanuts. Food nonetheless but…cheap food.

…And land matters. Ask African Americans.

Billions are nice. Hundreds of millions. But even that isn’t enough to truly shield you and create absolute real stability. Nor truly lasting safety. And fighting forever…is exhausting.

So…how does one win? You follow God. Through it all. And submit to His loving rules. The Holy Spirit guiding you.

But…what about evil? And evil hearted people? …People who may or may not care about anything, actually? …You ask for grace and strength from God. Even if it’s one long, exhausting, miserable life outside of His miraculous mercies.

Can a “lucky” woman from the right side of the tracks…suffer massive indignities? The kind usually psychologically reserved for the truly poor? Yes. …Of course. But was that her fate? The meaning of her life? …Probably not.

And that’s where it ceases to matter at all if the Illuminati exists.

Because no matter how many times you appeal to Satan…you can’t leverage six million Dollars against endless trillions. Satan can’t…create. He destroys. He can try to destroy trillions. Endless trillions. But…he has his limits. Despite what black Satanic Billy Grahams said in cars in the 1960’s according to Tik Tok…Satan isn’t as powerful as God.

Sorry if that offends you? Actually, I’m not sorry…but people don’t want to hear the truth. And they live in an imaginary world where you can use true nothing to create everything. Maybe they literally think they’re the God of Abraham and Isaac? And yet no one but that specific God is.

No. US Dollars are lovely. But…they aren’t…stars. Literal stars. Or even trees.

And this isn’t childish fan-fiction. It never was. And I’m not a teenager nor like a teenager. I’m in my 30’s. …I’m not a mean girl. I’m not a man. I’m not Marilyn Monroe reincarnated. I’m not a man reincarnated…

You haters sound crushed to me in my spirit. You sound like you’re being literally suffocated. Killed. Slowly. Of course, that’s entirely in my spirit though. …So that must make me evil? Except it doesn’t. And that’s just fact. Mathematical, eternal fact. Beyond eternal. You can’t truly make evil good nor good evil. *Satan laughs at people’s stupidity in thinking otherwise* God can redeem evil people. But that’s not alchemy…

And so why would an “Illuminati pawn” not want to run back and hide from the scorching hot sun or the drowning rains? Why wouldn’t a lovely little piece of wealth – because if one respects and appreciates their peanuts and uses them wisely…one can live well – want to be nice and safe, and toasty and dry? Why wouldn’t that sound pretty? …Because of narcissism and…real anger. Or is it rage?

…Even if someone doesn’t cognitively understand or consciously want to understand how six million isn’t six trillion and a background nor even six million and a background…they might sense it. In countless ways daily. And they recall making hamburgers and being mocked during their later teen years. Or selling french fries and being mocked for seeming too uppity for their station to the wrong person…or for seeming vulnerable to a wealthier bourgeois jerk. And in self-righteousness they take their real pain and real bad memories…and the tiny amount of actual empathy they have…and try to squeeze the life out of someone who feels satisfying to strangle. And who was that someone? Lacey, of course.

Because she’s…so meek. And mild. And quiet and…confusing. And seemingly a perfect person to attack. With all her innocent, good-hearted – albeit at times unbearable for some insecure folks – genuine sweetness. For a bitter, enraged sociopathic man with an (at least) semi righteous axe to grind.

And the lower ranks of the “Illuminati” who tell themselves that they’re on top…enable it. Try to see it nicely. Lie to themselves. Because it’s too excruciatingly painful to see it otherwise.

It isn’t that painful forever. It seems less upsetting the longer one breathes and ponders it rationally and calmly… But discomfort is unpleasant and highly to be avoided by some folks. …And ironically that’s partially what righteously angers and hurts the former McDonald’s employee in the first place.

Former McDonald’s employee? Yes. Because that’s where some poor and middle-class people work. It isn’t in a dignified, unionized coal mine anymore.

…And that’s a long story. Isn’t it