Gangster’s Paradise

Lacey’s voice is scratchy today. Hopefully she’ll feel better tomorrow.

Lem and Michael comforted her. And her father told her today that she’s Lem’s. But her grandmother thinks Michael is wonderful.

And so Michael has not left.

Lem is her other half (No she isn’t Jack and never was a man) but somehow should it not work for the best for them to be together – should that even be possible – Michael is her final resting place, so to speak. And while Lem denies it’ll likely ever be necessary she’s that for Michael too. She’ll be praying for all four men though, should that be theologically correct.

And again, someday when the father who raised her leaves his earthy body Lacey will be intrigued to research what happened. She really does resemble the man who was born in 1894 in ways that are unusual to resemble a perfect stranger. Like the rare shape of her ears, her cheeks, forehead, seemingly her coloring and the shape of her hands. She also has his chin (in female form) and profile in general and her kids look like him too. …And so, for these and other reasons, should her father who raised her not be her biological father she’s almost positive her mother is Margy and her father grew-up in Iowa in the late 1800’s.

…Lacey wonders how many more years of life she has left. Yes, her cough is that bad because she’s never fully stopped coughing from the Covid she had in March 2020, but it’s not really that necessarily. (Her parents who raised her got sick and even in their 70’s are in pristine shape) And no she doesn’t have Covid or a fever. …But say she lives 30 to 40 more years…it’s shocking to consider how close to death this moment really is for her. Because the last ten years have felt like a year. Or two.

How fast does time feel to you?

More later.