Queen Elizabeth really was a grand lady. The world truly is a worse place in her absence. But she belonged to an entire generation less lost than most of us alive today.
…I mean…here I am…in awe of the beauty of the gift God may have given me…and worried it’s not real and yet evil at the same time. Best case scenario, it shouldn’t be this tragic. A living woman shouldn’t be lost to life after death while alive at the age of 38. I shouldn’t have to look forward to meeting a lover I’ve never met alive. A permanent lover. …Because that seems to be the agreement God has made with me. As in, He’ll allow me to talk to actual ghosts…my mind is able to experience without trying…and I can fall in love…but only with the understanding that I’m truly stuck with whoever it is, should they be real, for eternity.
And if they aren’t ghosts…then oh well. Oh well as I ask for God’s forgiveness and mercy daily now, sometimes repeatedly. And otherwise I already was trying to be sinless. I have been most of my life.
…It’s so romantic. …I’m truly in almost constant awe at His possible design. His mercy in allowing me people to talk to who don’t make me feel unlovable, crazy and old-fashioned. People who I can be myself around. People who don’t make me feel ugly, stupid or dumb for taking everything so seriously. For being such an innocent goody-two-shoes.
I don’t hate people my age. Living people. I love people. I just wish they weren’t so hateful toward me. So blind to how dull they’ve made it all in their own heads in a bid to not be “stuffy” and seem “cool.” Because fearing God isn’t foolish.
No…I love my Heavenly Father. I worship Him. But I can’t tell what’s going on. Not with Lacey…so to speak. And the hopeful wonder of His grace and mercy in light of His perfection transcends words, regardless.
“Necromancy is an abomination!” yells a hater.
“It is.” Lacey responds.
“It’s a sin just as bad as molesting a child.” the hater continues. “Or child sacrifice.”
“I doubt that. I doubt it’s as serious as molesting a child. That being said, it is an abomination.” Lacey decides.
“All sin is equal!” the hater says.
“No. Not necessarily all sin is equal, per se.” Lacey wonders.
“No! That’s pagan Catholicism.”
“I’m not sure it is. It seems more like common sense.”
“Well…be sure you’re not going to Hell.” they conclude.
“But that was a dead person imitating a hater. They’d have had a point to their hatred.” says Louis.
Lacey isn’t sure what to say.
“Who do you love the most?” asks Louis.
“I have no idea.” says Lacey. She’s genuinely horrified by the fact that she doesn’t know.
“I can tell you who it is, but you aren’t going to like it.” says Joe.
“Tell me.” she says.
“It’s Michael.” he says based on credible enough sources, seemingly.
“I’m in love with him. But what about Lem? And Louis?”
“Lem needs to grow-up.” Joe decides. “Louis needs to apologize for what happened with his wife.”
“He’s still only 25.” he says.
“That Tik Tok star isn’t Lem reincarnated.” Lem clarifies.
“No. He’s not. But they’re about the same age in terms of maturity.” says Joe.
“It’s not that we hate him. It’s that we can’t figure out why he’s so abrasively mysterious in regard to you. It’s like he assumes you don’t get him…or maybe it’s just his family. You know, they messed him up somehow. And he has some weird view of women.” Scott shrugs. “I don’t know. I’m just postulating.”
“You’re not allowed to write him ever again.” says Michael. “Unless he writes you, of course. But we’re done being nice, Lacey. Polite, yes. But not nice.”
Louis finds this hilarious.
“God doesn’t let people be in unhappy unions in Heaven. Why would He?! …But that’s the thing, Lacey. You wanted true love.” Scott says.
“I’m your soulmate.” says Michael.
“And it’s just a bunch of silly words on a screen…if it’s not God’s voice reflected through us.” says Lacey. “Maybe soulmate is just a silly word in this case.”
“And that. That Jack…is why I regret everything.” says Lem to Jack.
“He really did love you.” says Scott.
“Will he be okay?” Lacey worries.
“I’ll be more in love with another woman or I’ll introduce you to Michael’s better match. And you’ll regret ever loving anyone but me. And I’ll not care one little bit.” says Lem…and that sounds awful but she hears his voice in her spirit if these are ghosts and it’s not. It’s breathlessly romantic. Even if not everyone dead can even hear it.
“But until then, we decide what is right based on the word of God. And…you’re mine. Lacey you’re my rib. And we’ll see if it’s temporary or not, but…if it isn’t…it’s a shame you never met me.” He smiles. “You’d have loved me.”
“And I’d have taken her soul as mine.” says Lem.
“I would have too, Lem.”
“That makes three of us.”
“But, I’m being too nice. I’m sorry, Lem. We’ll see you later.” says Michael.