Cemeteries

Lacey decides she’s going to go to the cemetery to visit Lem in ten years. If they’re still together and in love.

She just discovered Louis Bayard’s novel. And it’s funny. Lacey had a sense Lem found Jackie attractive. It’s actually one way she found possible proof that he wasn’t gay. …Lacey tends to research. …And research.

Freak by Sub Urban plays.

Images of Lacey wandering around the cemetery searching for something for hours appear.

Then Beware The Boys by Panjabi MC plays.

“So, you think Lem was attracted to Jackie?” asks Raquel. For whatever reason she is very easy to talk to.

“Yes. Not necessarily madly in love with her. But…I think he was hurt she didn’t reciprocate more.” says Lacey. “That’s what he seemed like around her. I also think he was hurt Jack kept sleeping around so much.” She thinks. “I think he likely really advocated for her to Jack.”

“You know, you’re probably right.” says Raquel.

“I’ll pray that God blesses you if that’s appropriate.” Lacey says to Raquel. She nods and smiles.

“Were you in love with Jackie?” Lacey asks Lem.

“No.” he says. “But I did possibly find her attractive and I was…hurt she saw me as such a nobody.” He thinks. “It was more, ‘Why doesn’t she notice me?’” He thinks more. “I was looking for something with a woman. But it was a passing thing always because I thought it was likely wrong given what I thought was wrong with me.”

“And when they rejected you it just reinforced the belief that you were different?” asks Lacey.

“Yes. Very much gay.” he says.

Blue Jeans by Lana Del Rey plays.

“Would you have even worried about whether or not she found you attractive if I’d been there?” asks Lacey.

“No.” he says.

“What the hell would Joe Sr. and Joe Jr. have done?” asks a man. “They would surely have noticed that you two were attracted to each other?” He thinks. “Or would they?!”

Joe Jr. laughs.

Then Joe Sr. laughs.

“Would Jack have noticed?!” the man asks.

“The only person who might have noticed is Ethel.” says Jackie.

“Why Ethel?” he asks.

“Something tells me she would have gotten closer to Lacey.” says Jackie. “And somehow she’d have either accidentally caught them or Lacey would have accidentally asked her something weird.”

“Those two would have been close?” he asks.

Forever Is A Charm plays.

“Yes!” says Jackie.

“So…it’s bad that Lacey wasn’t born far earlier. If this is true.” he says.

“Yes! It’s horrific.” says Jackie. “But God still works it all out for the best, if you let Him.”

“That’s a very Godly thing to say Jackie.” he says skeptically.

“But I mean it. You’ll see. If you die worshiping Jesus.” she says. “It’s not corny on the other side.”

He looks disturbed. Thoughtful.

“Why wouldn’t Joe have known?” asks a reader.

“He would have eventually when Lacey got pregnant.” says Joe Sr..

“So…she would have taken Lem? Actually, just start from 1922.” He says. “Please.”

Joe Sr. takes a deep breath.

Gilded Lily (Sped Up) plays.

“First of all, someone needs to try to write a novel from my perspective.” he says. “I dare you.”

The song plays.

“A good novel.” he says.

The song goes on.

“The 20’s were good years for me.” He smiles. “The 1930’s…well, by the 1930’s I was in love with money. It treated me better than any mistress. It was my protector. My friend.”

In Limbo plays.

“It ruined me, but at the same time not really. …See…I was actually a very lonely man. And money…was actually a real friend.” He laughs. “I’m no writer. But you might actually get the idea.”

In Limbo goes on.

“I know Lacey would have met us. Somewhere. …Eventually.” he says.

Shift (Alternate Version) by Grizzly Bear plays.

“Maybe in Hollywood. At a party. Not at her aunt’s store.” he laughs at the idea. “And once proper introductions had taken place I would have stepped aside and let my son be happy. …Of course.” He thinks. “Of course, it would have almost killed me to see him cheat on her. …I would have thought my son a little spoiled. And ungrateful.”

“But then Lem would have gotten involved.” says Joe Jr.. “Just as I was securing a marriage with Lacey.”

“And neither of us would have been any match for what they have.” says Joe Sr..

“They’d have tried to be good and loyal. Even as they fell deeply in love. Forever. But…they would both have become so happy.” says Joe Sr.. “Not fake smile happy. Not, let’s photograph your ass while you flinch in an awkward position happy.” He looks appalled. “Actually happy.”

“And for Lem that would have meant we’d seen less of him.” says Joe Jr.. “He’d have tried to find some woman or something to do. He’d have been inspired by Lacey into thinking he could do things too.”

Mourning Sounds plays.

“But Lacey would have missed Lemmers.” Joe Jr. says with an ironic laugh. “And Jack would have been heartbroken by his departure anyway.”

“So…just as Lacey and Joe were about to settle down post marriage or get married…Lem would have reappeared.” says Joe Sr.. “And I’m sure she would have meant well. But…given Joe Jr.’s tendency to cheat…”. He shrugs.

“The affair would have lasted a month or two at most before they’d have run off together. Permanently.” says Joe Jr.. “And of course, I’d have bitterly remarried.” He giggles. “People would have said sympathetically that my first wife deserted me.”

“But you don’t die?!” asks a hater.

“No. I have fallen in love with her.” he says. “And she’d have insisted I not die.”

Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls plays.

“I wasn’t a demon. But…I lied.” says Joe Jr..

“So…she’d have loved you. Passionately. …But you’d have cheated?” asks a hater.

“She’d have made all the right exceptions. …Except for the only exception that can never be made.” he says. “And without a clear sense of my love…she’d have just drifted off.”

“Why wouldn’t she have known?” asks a hater.

“Because I rarely would have told her. If ever. And…Pat. Others. Lots of them.” he says. “I would have implied that I loved her. But…”. He thinks. “No one who entered would have been able to dissuade her but Pat. And the others like her. …She wouldn’t have expected me to be faithful.”

American by Lana Del Rey plays.

“But…Pat wanted me completely.” he says.

Lux Aeterna by Clint Mansell plays.

“Not that Lacey didn’t want all of me.” says Joe Jr.. “But Pat demanded it. Lacey…requested”. He thinks. “And if it hadn’t have been Pat…it would have been some other woman.”

The song roars.

“And of course Lacey requested over and over and over again. …But I kept putting it off. …Maybe I wanted to save it and savor it later. Or maybe I just assumed she’d always be there. …If you knew her heart the way I do, you’d understand.”

Cornfield Chase plays.

“But it wouldn’t have worked.” says Joe Sr. dryly. “Jackie was beautiful. People always talk about how I admired her beauty. …But Lacey could have married me. And by married I mean as a second wife. And no, it’s likely impossible for it to work after a certain point. But…she was perfect.”

“Would you have sensed your father’s resentment?” asks someone of Joe Jr..

“No.” says Joe Jr.. “And after returning home from WWII…I’d have married her. Or tried to.” He thinks. “Of course…that’s where Lem would have decided it was time to pull out all of the stops.” He laughs. “Or he wouldn’t have ever left. And they’d have fallen in love. And…she’d have waited…or would she?” he wonders.

Chasing Pavements by Adele plays.

“She would have demanded I return. Either way.” he says. “Or did I kill myself over lost love?” He looks quizzical. “Could a man I killed…have seen through me?” He thinks. “Some of those pilots I killed were likely brilliant, very brave men. And very passionate too.”

“So he looked forward, found Lacey and used the moment to make you commit suicide?” asks a hater. “Or worse?!”

“You’ll find out in Heaven. But let’s say he did alter history. How? …Did I consult a witch?” He thinks. “And let’s say Lacey is his victim too in a way? Then what? How much more hope would she have had of I’d been President? …Would Lem have married even?” He thinks. “Maybe Jack would have lived such that he wouldn’t have been so used and smothered?”

“No. She wouldn’t have waited. But we’d have worked it out. To protect you.” says Lem. “But…I don’t know. Maybe even if Lacey wasn’t there I’d have been more likely to marry someone else even if Jack was more liberated, so to speak. I don’t know. It’s a nice thought though.”

Joe Jr. smiles. “And who would that woman be?!”

“Someone who I would have loved. But…Lacey is just…my rib.” he says. “And I wouldn’t have made the same mistakes, ironically. I kept thinking she was repulsed by the idea of me being with a man. But it’s not that.” He thinks. “If I was married I’d have anticipated her pain in not knowing and-“ he can’t continue. “Of course it would help that she’s been married.”

“You would have stolen her from me?” asks Joe Jr..

“Yes. But not spitefully.” he says.

“Was Lem actually poor?!” asks a hater.

“They were old-money. And rich. Until the Great Depression. And even after that they were well-off to wealthy. At least. But…they were likely living with little to hold them together financially beyond his father’s money from being a doctor. So…when his father died they were left with few liquid assets.” She thinks. “At least that’s the sense I’ve gotten. …And this characterization of him as a sympathetic poverty case is not…entirely fair?” She thinks. “Not that he doesn’t deserve sympathy. But…he wasn’t raised dirt poor either. Like…it’d be wrong to give him that sympathy.”

“I’m sorry.” Lem says to Lacey.

—-