In La La Land

II. by Philip Glass plays as performed by Adele Anthony and the Ulster Orchestra plays.

“We have a problem with a decaying world order.” says a man in Northern Ireland. He’s orange.

“It’s been decaying since American forces faught in the Spanish American War.” says Lacey, hypothesizing.

“Covid 19.” says Lem. “The Spanish American War. Spanish Flu.”

The song plays.

“I exist too!” says Harold Loeb.

“Anyway.” says F. Scott Fitzgerald. He laughs.

“We’re poor!” jokes the nation of Ireland.

“Well it had nothing to do with us.” says Molly Q.

Entry Of The God’s Into Valhalla by London Symphony Orchestra plays.

Molly McQuillan…IS…Q. From the grave. QAnon is run by Molly McQuillan, F. Scott Fitzgerald’s mother. Yes. Molly McQuillan IS the real identity of QAnon.

“Why does the wealth of Ireland have nothing to do with you?” Ireland asks Molly McQuillan, condescendingly.

“Because I was in St. Paul, you buffoon.” says Molly McQuillan sharply.

“I’d bet there’s a reason the Illuminati is scared to kill Lacey.” says Lem. “Is it mere class insecurity and jealousy or are you all afraid of dying and going to eternal Hell?”

“Because of Calvinism.” says Sarah Jessica Parker.

John Belter eats another German pastry.

“When is that from?” asks Lacey.

“1905.” says John Belter. “Düsseldorf.”

“Oh that sounds good.” says Lacey.

“It is!!! Go skiing!!” says John Belter before walking off laughing like a ghost.

Lacey thinks she should.

“But Lem will you come with me?” asks Lacey.

“I can ski.” says Lem.

“Lacey was supposed to go skiing last winter. And they just don’t want Lem and Lacey to exist. Because then they’re going to have to be Irish Catholic peasants with ugly teeth.” says Casi Brooke Hart about the Kennedys.

M79 by Vampire Weekend plays.

“Watch your step along the arch of glass.” says QAnon.

“It’s all rubbish!” says da Kennedys.

“You be frontin’ y’all?” asks a black wombs of the Kennedys.

“We have the the two Kennedy Assassinations!!” protests Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“What does that even actually mean?” asks black America.

“Boom boom!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“What does that mean?” asks the black woman.

Unbelievers by Vampire Weekend plays.

“We dance!” says Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg.

“And go vroom.” says Bobby Kennedy Junior.

Ethel smiles her ugly yet conceited grin as she leads the entire group of Kennedy children in a dance routine. Wearing a 1950’s sundress and hat.

“I’m HOT!” yells Ethel sincerely offended.

“My mom is hot. Grow-up!” yells Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“No. She’s butt-ugly.” says Molly McQuillan about Ethel Kennedy.

“We scored Lacey. But we didn’t think she’d be okay with pedophilia so we decided to kill her.” says the Illuminati pedophiles.

“I’m not okay with it.” says Lacey. In the literal last sentence to this one Lacey is trying to say that she’s not okay with pedophilia.

“Why did you fuck me, so often?” Ethel asks Bobby Kennedy Jr..

He looks at her sadly.

“I’m handsome. But I’m short! And…I think we’re close to equal. …I don’t know. I just loved you. You were fun.” says Bobby Kennedy Sr. to Ethel.

“I have a hard time accepting that.” says Ethel.

Bobby Kennedy Sr. gets angry.

“Why you angry dog?” asks Biggie.

“Because in my demented family I can’t let Ethel know how much I love her this way.” says Bobby Kennedy Sr..

“You can’t be this honest!” says Biggie eating ribs.

“No. It gives the women too much power in the relationship.” says Bobby Kennedy Sr..

“Well…Lem did you feel loved?” asks Lacey. “I didn’t.”

He thinks.

Campus by Vampire Weekend plays.

“Yes you did feel loved!” yells Joe Kennedy Jr. at Lacey.

She laughs. “You’re such a clown! No, I don’t and didn’t necessarily feel loved at all. I really don’t and didn’t. And I’m just going to go skiing and take my money with me and you can all just go do whatever the hell it is that you do. I’m sorry for swearing.” says Lacey sincerely.

“You FELT LOVED!!!! IT’S IN QUOTATIONS!” yells JFK at Lem.

“Her family money? Not Kennedy money.” says Molly McQuillan. “$15 million today.”

“That’s not that much.” says Michael Rockefeller, who’s just as confused as Lacey.

“No. I did not feel loved.” says Lem Billings, sincerely. “And Lacey is my wife!” he yells.

“Why did Ethel know we were joking and no one else did?” says JFK in a complete panic.

“What’s the joke?” asks Lacey.

“That you have such power in the bedroom that we have to compensate.” says Bobby Kennedy Sr..

“How?” asks Lacey, irritated.

“I was extremely aroused by you!” Joe Jr. yells at Lacey.

“So are most men I sleep with.” says Lacey. “And I add men because people get confused nowadays if you don’t specify. I only sleep with men. One man as of late.”

“Knock knock! It’s reality! …I don’t think this sexual logic is going to make sense to like Lacey and Lem and the British aristocracy.” says Hollywood.

More later.

Let’s Get It On by Marvin Gaye plays.

Ten women who’s “feelings have been hurt” by this blog dance in bikinis to Let’s Get It On. They have huge beach ball tits. Almost no hips. Huge butts or no butt. And very mannish faces. Strong jawlines. Big noses. Big mouths. Big teeth. And lots of thick heavily styled hair. Their shapes are feminine but…only in the details. Overall they look like men with no penis.

M79 by Vampire Weekend plays at the end of their performance.

One old, white billionaire claps his hands like a fool.

“Yay!” he says patronizingly. He raises a fist into the air in empathetic triumph. “Go Queen!” he says to be loving a liberal minded man. He believes he’s a high-minded person.

“So apparently Lem was straight?” says Bobby Kennedy Sr. in absolute confusion.

“Yeah.” says Joe Kennedy Jr..

“Huh.” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“I know Lacey likes to sleep with men.” says Jack Kennedy sincerely.

Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana plays as Bobby, Jack and Joe Kennedy all sons of Joe and Rose Kennedy sit outside of Lem and Lacey Billings’s house. In a parked car across the street.

“Have you checked to make sure the Victoria’s Secret order arrived?” asks Joe Kennedy Jr..

“Yes!” says Bobby Kennedy Sr. “I found the tracking number.”

“She’s gotta be wearing it tonight!” says Joe Kennedy Jr..

Jack Kennedy tries not to cry in the backseat.

The three men stare at the house.

The song ends.

“It sounds like he’s singing, ‘You’re in denial.’” says Bobby.

“But that’s not the lyrics!” says Joe Kennedy Jr. holding-up his phone with the lyrics.

Bobby reads the lyrics as the song starts over.

“Are we sure they have sex with each other?” asks JFK.

“Yes!!” says Joe, exasperated. “She got pregnant from his dick!” he yells at his little brother.

Bobby sings along to the song.

Joe yells.

He gets out of the car and starts kicking the tires.

Jack head bangs to the music. But Bobby is worried about Joe. He gets out to go check on Joe and they decide to get back in the car. They stare at Jack who’s now air guitaring to the famous song by Kurt Cobain.

“Actually, it sounds like he’s singing, ‘WE are in denial.’” suggests JFK.

They sit and think.

“But I’m almost positive Lem is gay!” says JFK.

“Yeah. Lacey’s probably gay too.” says Joe Kennedy Jr..

“Why?” asks JFK.

“Because! Who has this hot of a sex life?” says Joe Kennedy Jr..

“Couldn’t you have?” asks JFK.

“No!” says Joe. “Lacey never threw herself at me the way she does with Lem.”

“And Lem never wanted me to touch him.” says JFK, snapping his fingers.

“Yeah. But what if they arouse each other?” asks Joe Jr..

Bobby Kennedy looks disturbed.

They all think.

Silence.

“What if…they…have some weird form of sex?” asks Bobby, sadly.

“Like what?!?” asks Jack desperately.

“Like pegging.” says Bobby. “The woman puts a fake penis in the man’s butthole.”

“But then how did Lacey get pregnant?” asks Joe.

Jack looks disturbed.

“Huh. Well!” says Jack before weeping.

“What?!?” asks Bobby.

“Nah. It’s not that good.” says Joe Kennedy.

“No. It is!” says Jack crying.

(Adult content below)

“Fine. So what. Her pussy is great when she gives it to you willing. But…maybe he rapes her.” says Joe.

Jack looks hopeful for a moment but then…he gets sadder.

“Why Lem does want to rape a woman?” asks Jack.

“It could be pathological.” says Bobby.

“Let’s find out!” says Joe. He gets out of the car. His brothers join him.

Jigsaw Falling Into Place by Radiohead plays.

The three Kennedy brothers march up to the door.

They knock at the door. No one answers.

“Do you hear them?” asks Jack. He grins. “I can hear them!”

The three brothers race excitedly to the shed in the back and place the metal ladder against the wall. Bobby and Jack take the ladder and Joe climbs up the ladder and looks into their bedroom window.

The Look by Metronomy plays.

He looks through the window and sees Lem wildly thrusting his penis into Lacey’s vagina.

“My goodness. That is very convincing.” says Joe quietly to himself in a studious manner.

Lem begins to orgasm and Lacey yells, “Take me.”

Joe watches them orgasm together. Then they cuddle in an incredibly happy manner.

Once he’s calmed himself he slowly climbs down the steps and yawns. Scratches his ear and stares at his brothers.

“Well?!?” asks Jack.

“They seemed normal enough to me.” says Joe.

“I’ll kill Lacey!” says JFK.

“Why?” asks Bobby.

“Because! She ruined my Lemmers.” says Jack. “He was gay and now he’s all ruined.”

“No. He wasn’t. He was probably just frontin’.” says Bobby.

“But! I forced him into sex.” says JFK. “And he didn’t kill me. So!”

“Was he weirded out by it?” asks Bobby.

“Yeah.” says Jack. “Big deal!”

“That’s not what your note said!” says Joe Kennedy Jr.. “Your famous note that was supposed to be in response to Lem’s toilet paper note claimed the opposite.”

Jack shuffles uneasily. And at that Joe Kennedy Jr. takes Jack and begins strangling him.

The two men fight. They begin pounding each other with their fists.

Bobby Kennedy Sr. watches in sadness.

Five minutes later.

The two men looks rough. Shirtless and bruised.

Tired of fighting and possibly both secretly hungry the three Kennedy brothers wander back to their car.

Bobby Kennedy gets behind the wheel. Joe sits in the front. Jack sits in the back.

“Okay. So! Do we all know that Lacey and Lem are heterosexual and in love now?” asks Bobby Kennedy Sr..

Je te lasserai des mots by Patrick Wilson plays.

And…ten dead heroin addicts weep.

“No!” says JFK.

“Yup! Saw that one coming.” says Michael Rockefeller.

Bobby Kennedy Sr. exhausted, weeps.

“Dad!! Dad!!!” whines Bobby Kennedy Jr.. “If Heaven exists…and God exists…why is our society and family suffering. “Dad!!! Why?!?

Lacey has heard him…if the Illuminati exists…whine about this so many times.

“Don’t destroy Ireland. Please. I beg you.” says Joe Kennedy Sr..

“I miss Lacey. But I’m a man. Let me be a man.” begs Joe Kennedy Jr..