Q and A With Lacey Banks

“What are some old money mores and norms?” asks a reader.

A: I’ll answer those later when I have more time I’m currently being very violently distracted. I highly suspect that the evil Illuminati doesn’t like what I’m writing on my blog today and they find it very offensive because it hurts their feelings.

“Why did Great Britain attack Ireland?”

A: I’ll have to answer that later to for the same reasons.

“Are the living Kennedys really that obsessed and fixated on Lem being gay?”

A: If there’s an Illuminati then yes. Resoundingly yes. They need him to be gay. It’s unclear why. It might just be for personal reasons. I suggested to Bobby Junior years ago that the CIA killed his uncle. And if there’s an Illuminati he believed me. He even wrote about it. But he can’t handle hearing anything about Lem. He’s a dangerously fragile man in that regard, if there’s an Illuminati. Even as I’m saying this, he is violently arguing against me to the point of pettiness and being very pathetic that Lem was gay. He’s unable to even contemplate the idea that he was lied to by a man who shot heroin into his arm. He can’t fathom that Lem might’ve been trying to kill him and wasn’t just his best best friend ever who gave him illegal drugs, and encouraged him to destroy himself and die. He prefers to think of Lem as raffish instead of believing that Lem thought there was something wrong with him psychologically, and instead prefers to think that maybe Lem being so raffish was why he gave him heroin. Not that Lem was an adult, who, knowing how lethal heroin was simply didn’t care if Bobby died. And they never had any contact that was sexual so it’s not like Bobby’s covering up for a lover. It’s more that Bobby had a crush on Lem seemingly and prefers to think that Lem just never made a move for some mysterious reason, possibly that Bobby was too big of a deal and Lem felt too old and ugly or something self-aggrandizing on Bobby’s part like that.

More later.

“Lacey is not posting anymore for a while because she needs to edit the last few posts.

I really was a big deal. I really was high society.

Her second cousin Paula, no first cousin once removed Paula, had to contact Sotheby’s to auction off some of our things, years ago. That’s the kind of stuff I had in my house. I had rare things.

And I am not trying to be self-aggrandizing in saying that…just because I wore a tiara.

Lacey is terrified at the moment because she just listened to a piece by Vasily Kalinnikov that he composed in 1895 that spoke to her soul profoundly…a bit like Vaughan Williams, The Lark Ascending did. It was ah…Symphony No. 1 in G Minor. It was composed one year after her father was born and Lacey listened to it and found later that the Royal Scottish Symphony Orchestra had performed the piece beautifully. She wasn’t expecting almost anyone to have heard of it but no, it turns out the Royal Scottish National Orchestra did incredibly well, and that made her cry. It made her wonder if she’d heard it before in a previous life and that somehow affected her because all the sudden she started crying thinking about her dead husband never coming home and then she went upstairs hid under the covers in the darkness and felt a bit less insane at which point her legal husband Mark came up to check on her, and she had the strongest urge to ask for a very strong gin and tonic, and to get incredibly drunk. Lacey resisted the urge to get drunk, of course, even though it was a very strong urge and instead she’s having a spot of some tea. I highly suspect that Lacey would be capable of killing herself very easily if she didn’t have kids, and she hadn’t fallen down the stairs. I don’t know how, but I have a very strong suspicion if she listened to that song too much and she was 10 years younger she could easily end-up, drinking far too much and ending-up dead and that’s scary isn’t it? Because it makes you wonder if there is reincarnation in the Bible. You know let me talk about that for a moment.

*silence*

And I’m not going to edit this now. I’m gonna let her edit it as the evening goes on. I’ve been helping her lately with breathing and cleaning her house and it’s looking a lot better. Poor thing.

If there is reincarnation, it might’ve been nice to have had Lacey as my granddaughter. I don’t think Paula would’ve been a worse mother than Becca but I don’t know if that’s possible but it’s a nice thought. And believe it or not I would’ve loved her.

I had a very strong loyalty to the British crown, and if there’s reincarnation she would of, she would’ve made me smile.

But that’s wishful thinking as an apology. Paula, I know you’re weeping sweetie in the afterlife because we become friends if there’s not Hell for both of us to pay, so to speak if we believed in Christ. He’s very forgiving if you’re too stupid to understand and possibly He might know that you didn’t really reject Him and that in your feeble mind you accepted as much as you could or maybe we’re both were Christians? But isn’t that sad Paula? You could still be on good terms with Lacey and I don’t think the Nesheims knows that do they? Dammit. …Oh well…right now I’m trying to convince her to send out Christmas cards this year. Hopefully you’ll get one Paula dear.

Lacey, if there’s reincarnation, really did lose Michael or Lem or someone else or she’s imagining that she did and she died an old woman. But if she did lose her husband in World War I or even if she could imagine losing him is-it-it’s devastating to her still and if it’s Lem, you can imagine it’s 10 times worse because people are insisting that he was gay and oh that sounds nice at first doesn’t it? ‘Oh your husband was so loyal to you dear that when he was reincarnated, he decided to be gay.’ But Lacey’s not that stupid and she knows that’s not rational.

I think you’ve got a recall the fact that Lem…made love…to her.

That novel that she’s writing is very incendiary, but it’s all covert. It’s all very thinly veiled, but the character of Lem Billings in the novel he came on to her. At first she thought it was mutual, and just sort of playful and then it became this intense, passionate love affair, because of him. He came on to her and after that it just snowballed totally out of control.

At first she thought he was either gay and she was an exception…or that he wasn’t gay anymore or-or that maybe he had been bisexual or pansexual. …She would’ve never guessed that he was straight. That is not her invention.

Be careful assuming that she invented this idea that Lem was straight because it’s very possible that he actually was just straight…and he’s had to fight tooth and nail for her to take that seriously.

‘How could a man pretend to be gay if he wasn’t gay?’ Oh, that’s very counter to your popular narrative isn’t it? It’s too complicated to think that a man would pretend to be gay at a time when gay people were generally pretending to be straight…and a man ‘in the closet’ too. But then you don’t understand how complicated reality is, do you. Or how complicated people can be. Especially when they’re very intelligent and sophisticated and they don’t have things to distract them like cell phones and televisions. That was before the Internet! A man could come up with a lot of interesting ideas about things…while he was waiting to eat steak dinner…possibly laying in his bed, staring at the ceiling…trying to sort things out in his head.

Some people seem homosexual and don’t just act that way and oftentimes they’re probably not straight. And they’re closeted or not and they’re bisexual or pansexual or transgendered regardless of whether or not those are actual things in Heaven, and if they’re not in Heaven they are states that people are in mentally on Earth and it’s very hard to get out of them…if it’s possible at all.

How could he have pretended to be gay…because he was just pretending if you listen to his voice, he doesn’t sound homosexual in a real way. Why did he think he was gay? I have a feeling he’s explained it to you. I have a feeling it was because he genuinely got sexually confused.

See when people touch people’s private parts unless if that person is sort of guarded they still fully experience it against their will if it’s unwanted. It’s sort of like being tickled when you’re not expecting it or being punched when you’re not expecting it. …He wasn’t expecting it. He was molested. I don’t have the specifics, but it seems like it was a priest. And it seems like it was when Lem was probably 12 or 13 after the family had lost their fortune seemingly, although I can’t guarantee that but it seems like it was after the family lost a fortune so I guess that this priest probably thought that Lem was vulnerable. He may have even had a better idea of Lem’s father’s health than the family did, but something tells me that regardless…this priest knew that Lem was vulnerable and so he struck. And unlike Lacey who was also molested and other people who I’ve talk to who were molested, he couldn’t tell that it wasn’t a sort of natural thing. Lem wasn’t a pedophile, and he didn’t believe that you should molest children, but I think he thought because he was somewhat of a teenager and he was big that it was likely that he was gay…and that this man had just sort of been too violent and aggressive about it. He thought it through and incorrectly came to the conclusion that it had aroused him because it was a man and that therefore he was gay.

Lem really was a very loyal, faithful, loving decent man who just never found someone to attach himself to. And that’s why he was so gentle and sweet and caring, but then also was able to do such a ‘raffish’ things…because his entire life, as he puts it practically, he was basically in a constant state of denial.

And what was he in denial of? Umm. Well, let’s see.

Jack sexually oppressed the hell out of Lem from the moment that they met. If Lem was straight or even bisexual or gay, Jack was incredibly controlling. And it’s actually quite common for a very controlling, manipulative narcissist like Jack Kennedy to be incredibly unfaithful. It’s a way of manipulating and controlling the situation, or at least it used to be. It might not seem controlling but it’s incredibly controlling because it leaves people constantly wondering what the hell is going on because you’re supposed to be able to form some sort of secure attachment and not be constantly questioning if it’s going to be taken away from you, which is what promiscuity does. The thing is, what does that mean? It’s quite simple.

I think Lem believed that he was a mutant. Lem felt that he was a mutant man. And in order to be moral he repressed his own heterosexuality and Jack oppressed him to use him.” says Mrs. Carlisle. “He simply believed that he was a mutant man who was somehow feminine in a way normal men are not…and so he acted that way.

I’m sorry boys…Jack was a sex predator. That was his psychological make-up.

Jack was a predator and Lem was possibly never gay at all. Lem was a perfect victim and Jack liked victims. Did Jack ever have a normal romantic relationship? Probably not. I don’t know if he knew how to. I don’t know if someone like him can ever really be that normal.” says Mrs. Carlisle.

More later.

The next day:

“I am going to let the last few days go as far as editing, but I would like to point out that Lem had the capability of not seeming gay at all. As in there was nothing gay about him beyond his gay and effeminate exaggerative mannerisms. He really did figure out how to look gay but at the same time a lot of it really was just exaggerated feminine mannerisms and it’s uncomfortable to say that because I can see it and Lacey can see it and Elliot could see it and Eleanor Roosevelt could see it…but apparently you can’t? Which is annoying, because it should be obvious that in pictures, he would pose to sort of accentuate his hips or his mouth or eyes or his hands in a very feminine way. At times he looked slightly gay, but again it was all very forced, and when he stopped acting that way it would disappear.

If you look at a picture of an actual bisexual or homosexual man it isn’t forced and their body looks relaxed and natural and it’s the whole body that looks homosexual. It really is the whole body and there’s parts of the body that might seem somewhat straight at first but to someone who knows what they’re looking at like me and Lacey, and probably other people they can tell by looking long enough that it’s the whole body.

Let me find you a picture for you and then I’m done because this is just such obvious stuff and I really have no idea why people are so slow. Lem didn’t seem gay. Red Fay said that himself! Some even wondered if Lem was asexual, not that current writers acknowledge that analysis anymore. Which is very suspicious.

But he wasn’t. He wasn’t asexual. He was very confused and unfortunate and probably straight seemingly, but for those of you who are too backwards I understand and I’ll find a picture of a gay man and I’ll explain what I mean.” says Mrs. Carlisle.

“Both of those two men have mannerisms that are slightly like the mannerisms that Lem Billings used. The problem is they both seem gay Lem did not seemingly because Lem wasn’t gay…at all. So what’s the difference what part of it is and that they are both relaxed and natural. Both seem-they both seem like they’re posing for the picture, but they also seem like they’re honestly somehow representing some part of themselves or their experiences. I but it isn’t just about how natural they both seem they both also seem gay, or lack of a better word it’s the energy about both of them. It’s their joyful micro expressions. Their authentic muscle tenor. Their entire bodies seem gay. All of them. Well…maybe the man on the bottom seems slightly bisexual…but they’re both likely to identify as gay. Lem has a gay or bisexual facial expression…at times…mostly…BUT…it always falls apart in his body.

Red Fay…saw it. He described it as neutral. Why do we seemingly lie about what Red Fay meant? Because it’s too damn scary?” says Mrs. Carlisle.