Lacey: Will he die?
God: Within 10 years.
He just has to survive the next ten years.
Lacey: So kids being sexually abused who are trying to escape by starving themselves? Have how long?
God: They’ll grow older. That helps. Some. But…around…five to ten years.
It’s successful, but not really long-term.
They’re lying.
It’s suddenly a super effective procedure. Because if kids can die…they’re FUCKED.
That’s how pathetic they are.
Satan: I’m out.
You people are LOSERS.
God: And that’s why…if there is an AntiChrist…he tortures you. And there’s nothing I can do. If there’s a rapture.
That’s the theological idea.
Because…Christians are gone.
A male reader: So…ten years?
God: Yeah?
It’s not normal.
It’s not a stable long-term solution. 30 years? At most?
Satan: Why don’t you get it?
You’re LOSERS.
You’re LOSERS.
Answer me this. Do you have free will with Lacey?
A male reader from the perfume community: Not entirely?
Satan: WHY?
A male reader from the perfume community: Why didn’t she trust Casi?
Lacey: I don’t think she was trustworthy.
Satan: And that’s where you lose your free will.
Because what did you just do?
You instantly threw that out.
Don’t completely dismiss what she’s saying.
A male reader in the perfume community: Okay.
Why didn’t you trust her?
Satan: Lacey’s not at all attracted to women.
She’s already answered the question.
A male reader in the perfume community: I CANNOT HANDLE THIS!!!
God: No, you’re refusing to.
A male reader in the perfume community: Fine.
Casi’s a complete loser.
Lem: Yes. Colloquially speaking, yes.
Lacey: Why are you so weird about that!?
Satan: Do you feel more free will now?
The man: Yes.
But why must I-Why must I accept what she’s saying as true?
Satan: No. It’s not about that.
You’re not using critical thinking.
You’re just blindly rejecting everything she says.
So if what she’s saying…is actually true…you’re making yourself vulnerable to the consequences.
A female hater: Wait! So she’s not JFK?
Another female reader: FUCK! Are you DUMB?
A female reader: I can’t handle it.
She’s prettier than me.
Satan: SO WHAT!??
The Illuminati (?): We did that to her.
Satan: Yeah. You did.
You’re such idiots!
The Illuminati (?): That doesn’t bother you as much as you currently think.
We put a curse on people to not be able to handle it.
It’s the oil, I guess.
But it’s not working out.
A female hater: What did I think before?
Nefertiti: You were an adult.
You cognitively understood that she was merely just prettier than you. “Oh well! That’s life.”
And then you’d have found something superior to her. Something.
The female hater: *Smiles*
Yeah.
I’m a better driver?
Nefertiti: EXACTLY.
The female hater: *Goes into shock.*
I miss that. That’s how I cope.
LET ME THINK!!! *She screams at the Illuminati, should it exist.*
The man: Hold on.
Guys…let’s grow-up. There’s probably a real Illuminati.
Now…how did I lose my free will?
God: You abdicated it.
The man: WHAT!?
God: You didn’t want to think.
You genuinely all decided to let the Illuminati, if it exists, do your thinking for you. Years ago.
At first, it made you feel good. Superior even. But now, you feel scared? Or no?
The man: How did I decide this?
God: You got angry.
At Lacey.
And…when they asked your spirits if you consented, as adults, you agreed.
So they’ve been controlling your brains. Like you have no will. For a few years.
At times.
It’s minimal.
Almost unnoticeable. But…you’re willingly going along with this.
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: So…I can get out of this!?
God: Yes!
You’ve been willingly going along with this.
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Why…-
Okay.
I can see why I did.
But why did they?
God: Why did you?
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: She belongs in Gettysburg. Helping them.
God: Okay.
Why did you do it?
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: *Looks embarrassed.*
*Laughs.*
I’m poor. Okay?
Lacey: I was never attacking you!
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Yeah.
My family doesn’t have homemade macaroni and cheese, Lacey Banks.
Lacey: Then come have dinner at my house!!!
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: My dad says…that your dad…judges us.
Lacey: *Looks deeply upset.*
I don’t!
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Well…-
Well…my dad says so.
*She shrugs.*
Lacey: That’s not true!
We’re not judging you!!!
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: See…you’re not.
But…-
*She thinks.*
You are.
Lacey: *Thinks.*
I need a second to process this. I’m sorry.
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: *Nods in understanding.*
*Later.*
Lacey: Well…can you build an army?
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: No.
*He shrugs.*
Lacey: Okay.
I can.
My people did and do.
…I can be your friend…as long as you don’t let someone else come for me…while we’re hanging-out.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Seriously!? *He says to someone else.*
You’re for real?
Lacey: YES!
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Okay…
*He thinks.*
But that’s not what we’re talking about?
Lacey: Actually…I think it is.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: *Looks shocked.*
I don’t understand.
Lacey: So…your television is old.
Right?
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Yeah…
Lacey: WHY!?
Oh! I know why.
Because…Lord Marlborough…bought your turnips.
He did.
And I know why he bought them-
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Well…yeah.
Because he gave us a better price…
Lacey: Yes. Okay.
Because he’s attacking me.
So…if I hang-out with you…I’m going to be weird about your old television. Not because I’m judging you…but because you’re working for my enemy.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Okay.
But…our new oven…is because of him too.
Lacey: I’m willing to overlook that.
What bothers me…is that you’re-
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: No. See…that’s my choice.
Lacey: But you’re making a mistake.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: Maybe I am.
Maybe I am.
Lacey: Well…it bothers me.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: Umm…-
I think I’m judging you.
Lacey: Huh.
For what?
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: You’re too nice.
Lacey: That’s just my personality. There’s nothing I can do about it.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: I can’t stand how you walk around my house…figuring everything out. It’s…totally overwhelming.
Lacey: *Thinks.*
I do do that.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: Can you stop yourself?
Lacey: No.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: Why does your brain do that!?
Lacey: *She thinks.*
That’s all there is to think about.
A man on behalf of the Tarot Card reader: *Thinks.*
Lacey: Yeah.
And it’s done for safety reasons.
Queen Elizabeth II: I did it too.
It’s instinctual.
Lacey: I could do a quick sweep.
But there’s nothing else to think about…
You don’t even like me.
So my brain is BORED.
The Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: You’re right.
Lacey: Yeah!
I’m not “judging you”.
I’m keeping myself safe.
The Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: Were you protecting immigrants?
Tom Banks: DUH!
Yes.
She’s not evil.
Just because she’s able to see through you, doesn’t mean she’s evil.
GOOD GRIEF!
A Tarot Card reader in the perfume community: What do you want from us?
Lacey: NOTHING!!
You all were HARASSING ME.
It was NOT the other way around.
The man who was helping the reader: I kind of think she was right, here. I’m sorry.
The Tarot Card reader: I can’t handle this.
The man: *Rolls his eyes.*
The Tarot Card reader: I CAN TELL YOU THINK I’M DUMB.
Lacey: You are.
You are!
You’re BUTT UGLY compared to some other women who you’re currently bullying. And they don’t know that. They think they’re the ugly ones. Because you’re a lying bitch!
You’re incredibly dumb!
Another perfume collector: Why is that dumb?
Lacey: You don’t understand why that’s strategically very stupid?
Another perfume collector: No.
Lacey: Because…you’re actually weakening your base.
Your…ability to defend yourself.
Because you have no real honor.
You’re completely full of shit.
So…if anything comes for you…and it’s so likely it will…you’re FUCKED.
Jeff Bezos: Lacey…we don’t teach them this anymore. Because current billionaires don’t like it.
Lacey: Oh.
When did that start?
Jeff Bezos: *Thinks, and freaks out.*
*Takes a deep breath.*
In the late 1990’s.
Lacey: Huh.
*She thinks.*
I hadn’t noticed.
I’m too old.
Jeff Bezos: *Laughs.*
Yeah.
It’s…not something we want to accept.
Lacey: You know…it really is true though!
Jeff Bezos: Is it?
We have so much control over nature nowadays.
What is this inevitable threat?
Lacey: Well…what about the current fire situation in Europe?
Jeff Bezos: *Thinks.*
Dammit.
Lacey: Mother Nature is…beastly.
*She thinks.*
I don’t think you can ever fully control Mother Nature.
Not fully.
Jeff Bezos: Well, anyway, I think we convinced people they were safe being bullies. Because somehow…we had more control now…?
Lacey: Thank you for telling me.
Jeff Bezos: *Nods.*
*Later.*
A reader from New Jersey: Do you think those are concentration camps?
Lacey: *Thinks.*
Yes and no.
No, in the sense that they often are criminals. And theoretically, I think they could just leave the country?
Yes, in the sense that they may be being tortured. And some of them are kids. And some of them are innocent.
Yet another reader: WHY THE HELL…did you all start attacking her?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
We felt…hurt.
Yet another reader: Ahhh…what?
Why did you sell your turnips to Lord Marlborough?
The perfume community: *Thinks.*
We sided with him.
To be honest.
Yet another reader: YEAH!
You’re such liars.
The perfume community: Shit.
Yet another reader: So…now what?
Because you chose to hate her?
You chose a side!
*He shrugs*
The perfume community: Is she even at war with him?
Lord Marlborough: No. I was a safe name to use in the metaphor.
Lord Loughborough: It’s a fine metaphor.
Go with it.
Yet another reader: So…you made your choice.
The perfume community: She hates us.
God: No.
You hate her.
The perfume community: Do I just want drama?
Lord Marlborough: YES!
I was extremely impressive.
You sided with us…because I’m Duke of Marlborough.
Prince Harry: Why did you think they were someone else?
Lacey: There either is no reincarnation, or…I’m confused.
Duke of Marlborough: That’s my home.
Lacey: I’m sorry I was confused.
Sir Winston Churchill: No!
Nothing to worry about.
The perfume community: *Thinks.*
So we’d choose them?
Over the Rosslyn family?
Lord Loughborough: Aye.
You like us…enough. But…you’d be more impressed by them.
Was Casi more impressive to you? Ultimately. Be honest.
The perfume community: Yes.
Lord Loughborough: Why?
The perfume community: Because she’s happy.
Lacey shouldn’t have trusted that we gave one shit about her, really.
See…she felt superior. But, she had a heartbreaking marriage. And we feel better than her.
I mean…she’s Tom Banks’s daughter. And that’s cool. But…they’re all dead. And I don’t give a shit.
I want a loving relationship NOW. In the flesh.
Sir Winston Churchill: Okay.
But…that’s not social class. Nor brains. Nor beauty.
The perfume community: I know.
We’re heartless.
We made it about that…because we didn’t want to be honest.
Sir Winston Churchill: Why?
The perfume community: Because we can’t tell her…”Oh! You’re not cool because we’re too adult to care about…money.”
Sir Winston Churchill: Why?
That’s perfectly reasonable.
The perfume community: Because then we look dumb.
Why care about healthy relationships…when you’re that totally heartless?
Sir Winston Churchill: Well…why do you care? When you’re that heartless.
The perfume community:
Eminem: No. This is what happened!
The perfume community: Because…
Listen to “Army Dreamers” by Kate Bush.
The perfume community: Because…we want success.
But not…loneliness.
And…we don’t care.
We don’t care.
I guess.
We want…all the stuff…it’s true.
But more than that…we want…happy relationships. Not with you. You’re not good enough for us, Lacey.
We want people to be happy. Or they’re not good enough for us.
We don’t feel that people who have burdens…should be near us. Even if they are fine and innocent. Because…we’re-
God: You’re idiots.
The perfume community: Okay.
Well…we don’t understand how people get happiness.
So…being around someone who has sadness…makes us worried we’ll get it too. Like a disease.
And we’re not quite that dumb. But…-
Casi Hart looks HAPPY.
Lacey: And you don’t care how dumb she looks.
The perfume community: No.
It’s fine.
Lacey: Okay.
Listen to “Cigarettes out the Window” by TV Girl.
Lacey: What if she’s faking it?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
1:09
1:22
The perfume community: She’s not faking it.
Lacey: How do you know that?
The perfume community: SHE CANNOT BE FAKING IT.
Lacey: Okay? But what if she is?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
She can’t be!
Lacey: Okay.
But what if she?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
A dead Black Slave: Now…how do you account for my life?
The perfume community: We don’t.
We don’t think of you at all. Almost.
Listen to “Bad Things” by Cults.
Lacey: What if she’s faking it?
The perfume community: *Thinks.*
She CANNOT BE FAKING IT.
Lacey: But what if she is!?
The perfume community: *Thinks.*
She can’t be!
Lacey: What? Huh?
No, but what if she is?
The perfume community: No.
No…
Fine!
I DON’T KNOW!
I can’t tell.
Lacey: Okay.
But what if she’s faking it?
The perfume community: *Thinks.*
*Laughs*
I don’t know…
Lacey: Well, think about it!
It’s for your own good.
Listen to “Things to Do” by Alex G..
The perfume community: Why are you suddenly force feeding us?
A dead Mexican: BECAUSE I WANT IT!!!
DEAL WITH IT!
2:11
2:22
The song ends. Listen to it again.
The perfume community: I can’t deal with it!!
0:47
Lacey: You don’t have a choice.
What if?
The perfume community: NO!!!
NO!!!
*It screams, rocking back and forth.*
2:01
A dead Mexican: *Laughs at them.*
Listen to “Angeles” by Elliott Smith.
Lacey: What if?
The perfume community: Then I’m…fucked.
Lacey: Why?
The perfume community: Because I was counting on her being happy.
Lacey: For what?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
2:15
The perfume community: *Thinks*
This song is creepy.
Listen to “Beautiful Day” by U2.
Lacey: Why does she need to be happy?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
Because I was counting on it. My whole life perspective- My worldview makes no sense…if she’s not actually happy.
Do you understand?
Lacey: So…you’re dumb?
Why do you need her?
Like…a cooking recipe?
The perfume community: *Thinks*
*Later.*
The perfume community: FINE!!
*It screams.*
FINE!!!
You’re RIGHT.
Fine.
…It’s stupid.
It’s stupid.
It’s just…haven’t you ever looked at people on Instagram and wondered if you could be that person?
Lacey: I don’t know.
Go on?
The perfume community: Well…we do that.
Lacey: Okay.
Go on?
The perfume community: We wanted to find someone to…admire. Or look to for…guidance. Inspiration. Leadership.
Casi Hart…even if she photoshops her photos…looks good. Happy. Successful.
Your haters always seemed happier than you.
And…that’s all I care about? Well…no. It’s not. But…she does seem happy. Okay? To me. To me she seems happy.
And…I guess…that’s more important than your humanity?
Maybe she’s a poor dumb bitch? Whatever? Because…she’s happy. And she looks good.
I want results.
Okay?
So…I buy dupes. For $50. And…to me…they’re better. Because they’re $50. You cost…$500. And…you’re gone on my skin in 5 hours.
Casi…is $50! And she lasts ALL DAY LONG.
Make sense?
Lacey: But what if she’s made of battery acid?
The perfume community: Okay.
Well…
You know…I almost don’t even care anymore.
Lacey: Okay.
Because if it smells good? And lasts?
The perfume community: Yes.
You’re…probably brilliant. Fine. Cool.
But…she copies you, I think. A lot of people do, now.
And sure, we can’t keep copying you. So…we’re fucked. Long-term.
But right now? *They shrug.*
And all I care about is right now. I tell myself I care about the future. But…I barely do.
Lacey: I actually have already aesthetically moved on.
You guys are like 2022. Earliest.
The perfume community: No.
Lacey: Yup.
It’s MY aesthetic.
I would know.
And I’m sorry. You’re FUCKED.
You’re stuck in what I was doing like…four years ago.
Do you understand how outdated you are?
The perfume community: No.
Why can’t we just your aesthetic from 2022?
Lacey: I’ve changed a lot in four years. I’m still the same person. But that’s ME. You’re copying ME.
In 2022…a lot was different for me.
A lot was different for ALL OF US.
Keen to Cross the Pond 
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