Author Archives: L.

“WHY DID YOU TURN SO COLD!?” says Mr. Guerlain to Lacey.

She thinks.

“I’m lost…” says Lacey. “COLD!?”

“YES!! …YOU WEAR the perfume.” he says.

“But people do die.” says Lacey. “One can appreciate the notes too.”

“I AGREE!!” says a woman in Sweden.

“Her way of analyzing the perfume is very Scandinavian.” says Norway.

“She’s abandoned and freezing to death inside. And doing her best to enjoy freezing to death.” says her Scottish mother who exists regardless of reincarnation.

“So you are trying to enjoy your own death!??” says Mr. Guerlain, scoffing.

“YES!!!” says God. “YES!!!!”

“I gave up and just died.” says Matt. “Matchy matchy.”

“Holy SHIT!” says King Charles III.

“Excuse me!?” says Lacey.

“Yes. I’m swearing.” he says.

“Okay.

But…what’s your meaning?” says Lacey.

“I’m worried about Matthew.” he says.

“I’m fine.” says Matt.

“But you committed suicide!” says King Charles III.

“Yes. …But I’m…or was…insane.” says Matt.

“Is Lacey insane?” says King Charles III.

“NO.” says Matt.

“What’s YOUR PROBLEM!??” yells Dennis at King Charles III.

“I’m VERY IMPORTANT!” says Monsieur Guerlain.

“I did love you. But I messed you up.” says Queen Elizabeth II to Charles.

“I’m not that bad!” says Charles.

She cries.

“I think she tried her best!” says Lacey about Queen Elizabeth II.

“She did.” says God.

“I LOVED…MERLE HAGGARD!!” says JFK’s residual energy.

“Lacey! YOU WEAR PERFUME!!!” yells Monsieur Guerlain.

“BLAH!! BLAH BLAH!!!” says Lacey. “Blah!!! Blah!!!”

He cries.

“Oh dear. …Was it that offensive? What did I say?” she says. “I had no idea you were fluent in blah.”

Silence.

“Lacey!! We need to keep the roads in working condition!” says a man in Elon Musk’s crew who has discovered how the elites are paying for the roads.

“Does this have anything to do with the precision conversation or not?” asks Lacey.

“No.” he decides.

“How bad would it get?” she says.

“I know!!!” says Elon.

“BAD!!!” says a Republican.

“Like how bad!?” says Lacey.

A woman in the Republican Party laughs.

“Umm…ten collapsed bridges. Three useless highways. …That’s…the beginning.” they say.

“SUCKERS!!!” says Lacey. “What else?”

“A whole highway that’s…dead.” says Donald Trump.

“OH DEAR. Wow!!! …So you thought sending kids to living Hell was worth that shit!?” says Lacey.

“I kinda agree.” says Jeff Bezos.

“Yeah. That’s..stupid.” says Lacey.

“Just let the bridges go.” says a hospital.

“Yeah. Focus on beefing up the hospitals in each city. And let the bridges be completely torn down. …You could make it seem normal even!!” says Lacey.

“Could you have even done that!??” says Israel.

Donald Trump laughs.

“YES.” he says. “40 years ago? YES.”

“Why are we bleeding money!?” says Lacey.

“You!!” says Donald Trump Senior cryptically.

Lacey thinks.

“Yeah.” says Lacey. “Dammit. We needed those steel mills.”

“How much would that have done!?” he says.

“We’d be 60% recovered.” says Lacey. “Who thought snorting coke was a healthy thing? In the 1800’s? Or did they mean to obliterate their soul?”

Louis thinks.

“Kansas is taking credit.” says a dead sports announcer.

“The meat industry!?” says Trump.

“RELATED!” says Kansas.

“So you’re headquartered in Kansas City?” says Trump.

“YES.” they say.

“So was IHOP supposed to cover for you?” asks Lem.

“We had problems.” says the meat packing industry. “A lot.”

“How did you ruin the entire country!?” says Bill Rhea.

“We had issues with three things.

1. Prostitutes
2. The safety of the meat
3. Native Americans.” says a man.

“Did they attack you?” says Lacey.

“YUP!” says Kansas.

“The prostitutes and the Native Americans?” asks Joe Biden.

“YES!!” yells Kansas.

“And you put soap in the meat? And dead mice. And…slabs of meat were covered in saw dust and poop.” says Lacey.

“Among other things.” says Kansas.

“Like what?” asks Lacey.

“Dead humans. Dead Indians. Dead women. …Dead…energies.” says Kansas.

“And how did that ruin the country?”says Donald Trump.

“We mismanaged it all. Just enough to cause problems. For everyone.” says Kansas. “And we made it. But it was still lingering into the 1980’s when the Illuminati first started selling children to get by.” says Kansas.

“That’s so pathetic. And yet…it’s amazing how well the US has done.” says Lacey.

“I agree.” says Kansas.

“Does this make sense!?” asks Donald Trump.

“YES.” says God.

“How do you let a bridge being used die!?” yells a man in Connecticut at Lacey.

“You’ll have to wait.” says Lacey. “I’m busy. I’ll be back soon!”

Later.

“Somebody in Kansas in Purgatory has been helping Jack and he used all of that just to attack Lacey.” says George. “They trusted because he’s JFK and they didn’t look into it because they’re in suffering in Purgatory for their sins that they have less grace to let go of than when they were alive even though they can still do it that…that he was going to use the power that they were giving him to save the US. And instead he’s used the power to just attack one person who is the twin flame of ex basically even though it’s not really his ex it’s a man that he was taking advantage of because the man didn’t realize that he was actually just straight.”

“That’s LEM!” says a gay man reading her blog.

“I’ve heard that name before.” says George.

“Yeah that’s Lem Billings that you’re thinking of. JFK was with that confused man? Yeah…that’s Kirk LeMoyne Billings.” says a gay actor.

“Yeah, his name was Kirk!” says George.

“Yes, that was his first name!” says a gay actor.

“Except I was told not to trust you, and I’m amazed that your identifying him as he actually is.” says George, laughing.

“I guess I’m just deep.” he says.

Later.

“How do you kill a road!?” says Lacey. “You let it die.

Then you say…’How much do we need the road?’” says Lacey.

“To be honest if I was there, I would’ve said, ‘I don’t know! Do you want to go shopping at the mall of America or not?’” says Louis Hill Junior.

“And I would’ve thought about it and wondered why the hell I’m supposed to care so much about shopping at the Mall of America and then I would’ve thought no I guess that’s important? And I would’ve said, ‘Aren’t their back roads?’” says Lacey.

“And I would’ve said, ‘Yeah, but how are you expecting till-that the other people are going to be OK with that?’” says Louis.

“That’s a good point!’ I would’ve said. ‘Why can’t we just make the malls in the suburbs better?’” says Lacey. 

“You’re right, that might actually work if we could convince people that the mall of America is more of a tourist destination, and that the other malls in the suburbs are more for locals and actually make it seem sort of like a Minnesota secret.” says Louis.

“Yes and the irony is that that’s how it is anyway but I think we’d probably have done stuff like that and it actually would’ve made the whole state most likely better than it is now and then people would’ve thought, ‘Why did we even need that bridge in the first place?’” says Lacey.

“Yes and then there would be very few things that we would end-up building almost anywhere.” says Louis.

“Does this end-up working out, Louis if I can say that, does this end up working out?” says President Donald Trump.

“ you’re using her to talk to me and the irony is that she doesn’t realize that yes actually it doesn’t up working out. She’s a genius and the John birch society is ready to make her an honorary member. That’s how they think and they’re not stupid. I’m sorry it’s hard for me to know what to say because my wife was the sort of woman who wanted to sacrifice anything for a good deal at a Bloomingdale’s will say, so I got used to thinking like that my second wife and somewhat my first Lacey‘s way of thinking is totally different it’s like a British aristocrat whether she has one or not and so it’s foreign it’s old Ed it’s very stabilizing but it’s not American and you have to kind of get used to it.” says Louis.

Later.

Lacey eats Korean ramen. She buys it at Asian markets.

“With egg and green onion.” says Tara Fitzgerald.

“That’s SPICY!” says a woman.

“Yes. But good.” says Lacey.

“We’ll have to close certain bridges.” says Donald Trump.

“Pick the right ones!” says Lacey.

“How does that not create more poverty for certain people?” says a Native American.

“You just have to pick the right ones. You have to research the demographics and pick the right ones.” says Lacey.

“So there are bridges in downtown Minneapolis that you could’ve closed and saved money on closing ahead of time before they collapsed. Yeah. So probably would’ve saved the state like $5 million but that’s still that’s $5 million that’s still at it adds up.” says Andrew Engen.

“Yeah… so probably close that bridge beef up the others and then you end up saving 3 million because you have to care about the other bitches more than you already. Do see you save three and then you just start paying more attention to the reasons why people use the bridge so you beat up the hospitals in each city you may be start having sporting events. I’m trying to think let’s see with other issues in mind so bridge where in tear Hass to be focused on sporting events and then you’re sort of keeping people outside of the cities so St Paul State, Isn’t St., Paul, Minneapolis days and Minneapolis for the most part other people do I was the travel sub but not that much so then you’ve got a focus on making jobs in both cities hospitals in both cities schools and both cities obviously and they have them here already and they’re in Minneapolis-St. Paul. They really won’t be that big of a problem. It’s pretty well allocated everywhere. There’s not that much of a problem at all. You just don’t have to discourage people somehow, maybe from wandering over unless if it’s absolutely necessary, and then you know there’s sporting events in Minneapolis and St. Paul but that’s a rare thing you don’t generally use the rich so maybe there would even have to be a better St. Patrick’s Day in Minneapolis. Maybe there would have to be at a better time. I’m trying to think a better midnight mass I mean what are we using these bridges for like sporting events the airports possibly and so yeah OK maybe we have to have a better airport in St. Paul so they would have to have a better airport and St Paul would have to have better hospital stuff like that but I don’t see how that’s a bad thing anyway I really don’t and I think people could’ve afforded it and then like a small of America is popular but probably always pretty much more of a tourist destination which means that it may have ended up failing and going bankrupt about 5 to 10 years ago or coming close to it yeah and then I don’t know it, Mary not even exist, and it may have been seen as sort of a failed experiment and making a giant super giant mall and that’s the thing in Minnesota people be like oh no they’re Southdale. There’s Maplewood and people would probably still be going to those places and just hanging out even and it just wouldn’t be the thing to go to the mall of America and yeah, it might not have last very long, so I think maybe it’s possible that this would’ve actually worked.” says Lacey.

“ so I think what she’s maybe trying to say is that use that as an example so there’s not a full proof way of doing it with him but as long as things stay stable it’s kind of like Jenga.” says Lem.

“ yeah you don’t want to top of the whole thing over.” says Donald Trump.

“ yeah and then do a little hard as possible down harmony communities don’t hurt people keep things pretty much status quo unless if you think you could address an issue but then that has to be done very carefully.” says Lem.

“ so if they thought rationally Lem and Lacey, that would be really helpful thing to say.” says a Native American.

“if they don’t think rationally, the country will eventually collapse, and it’s starting to.” says Lacey.

“Yeah. No, this makes sense.” says Casi. “I’m SO CONFUSED.”

“So what are they doing!??” says Lacey to Casi,

“They are…fools.” says Casi.

“And they’re… trying to do what??” says Lacey.

Casi smiles. “ I am curious too.”

“ let’s find out!” says Lacey.

They wander over to Mr. Guerlain.

“ I need a new perfume to wear!” says Lacey to Mr. Guerlain.

“ I don’t know.” he says.

“ wasn’t that the point of this whole blog post you had some great revelation for me some scathing insights and brilliant perspective!? pay up!” says Lacey.

“ I don’t know.” he says.

“ was Monger Lane a good perfume for me to wear!?” says Casi.

“No!! The opposite!” says Lem.

Casi shuts-up.

“ why the fuck do you people keep fooling yourselves she’s obviously supposed to be wearing perfume that sexier.” says Lem.

“I would have said the same thing.” says Kasey.

“ how gosh we fucked up I think we took her way too seriously in the wrong way.” says Mira.

“ yeah a but not serious enough at the same time Lacey speaks literally and so what you needed to realize was that when she said Chanel 22 was an oil factory equivalent of her soul that maybe that’s all it was.” says Lem.

Silence.

“ why the fuck is she wearing an oil factory equivalent of her soul?” says Lem. 

“ I don’t know.” they say.

“ yeah. But that’s not really normal!” says Lem.

Silence.

“ she’s very pretty and so what you should’ve been saying if you’re going to offer advice that was totally on requested was that she should be wearing sexier stuff things that are a little less well the way that people today would perceive them would be homosexual. Chanel 22 is classy, but it also could end up seeming homosexual to some people and it’s not but people are desperate nowadays a lot of women are desperate to find a wife or a girlfriend, and they delivered them selves into thinking that women who are interested in them as friends are interested in them for some other reason like Casi did with Lacey. And so you could’ve observed that Lacey was straight because she obviously fucking is that I am too, but you could’ve knowing that a fact you didn’t know that and then you lied to yourselves and believes yourselves, which is really scary and sick. And part of the reason you were able to do that is because Jack’s energy is tormenting her, and has been enabled by other spiritual beings to do that. So what you needed to do was guide her towards some thing that’s a little more sexy to men. So mine grew Lane or Prada candy kiss, or a black opium, or a decadence by Marc Jacobs things that actually are supposed to be arousing and on her are if she was supposed to be wearing stuff like that but men have never been honest with her, and they’ve been very cruel, and Phyl blew it today. He was supposed to be vulnerable with her for five seconds and he chose to just be an ass.

And that’s not surprising to me we don’t hate him, but I’m very disappointed in him as a person. So what we needed to do was just what you needed to do rather was just guide her towards perfume that was more sexual like Coco mademoiselle is fine, but not that terribly sexy. She’s very feminine, so sexy feminine perfume is what she should be wearing and she does somewhat, but I realize that she thinks it’s a little girl little girl like as so it’s hard to convince her to wear it because to her it’s just stupid as fuck.

Who sells she wears youth to she wears Chanel number five for me because I actually completely agree with her to some degree that a lot of the sugary, sweet perfumes of today are kind of childish and stupid. Because I was straight and still up, and I liked the perfume of my own era. so yeah for me she wears taboo and stuff like that and I like it. I do actually like some of the more modern perfumes on her as well though because I’m still a man and I’m straight and I’m attracted to her so I’d like monger laid on her. It’s not really a perfume that Casi could wear. I’m not stupid just because I’m straight and faithful.” says Lem.

“ do you like youth dew?” says a man.

“ yes I do. Are you deaf!?!” says Lem.

“ what does she like?” says Mr. Guerlain.

“ she likes she likes a lot of different perfume. She doesn’t have a favorite anymore.” says Lem.

“ we keep making it impossible?” says Jennifer Aniston.

Coco Chanel nods. “ yes because you’re too offended.”

“ what would have been your favorite perfume in the greatest generation?” says Jeremy Fragrance.

Lacey thinks. “ you’re not going to like this I would’ve worn a lot of different perfume lotta different a few. I love perfume but what I would’ve done is find a way to take vanilla extract or vanilla oil and mix it with Nivea lotion and I would’ve just worn it every day. I would’ve just smelled like vanilla all the time.”

“ see you would’ve always smelled like vanilla mixed with other perfume, but you would’ve smelled like vanilla all the time?” says Maria.

“ yes vanilla possibly with a little other bit of perfume I might’ve just wore the perfume by itself but I suppose if vanilla it was everywhere on my clothes and such eventually I might have mixed it with vanilla but no I would’ve smelled primarily like vanilla all the time lotta vanilla.” says Lacey.

“ I would’ve said you’re wearing vanilla extract!” says Elsie.

“ and I would’ve said yes I am and mixes very well with people cigarette smoke.” says Lacey.

“ what is food!?” says Elsie.

“ and then I would’ve said well shoot you’re right I should probably figure out some other way to just wear vanilla.” says Lacey.

“ oh, and then you would’ve just started trying to find ways to make vanilla oil or you would’ve started sourcing vanilla oil?!” says Elsie.

“ yes cause I’m determined to smell like vanilla I want to smell like vanilla so I would’ve found a way to get vanilla in a way that people wouldn’t read as food.” says Lacey.

“ she could’ve she could’ve done it. Sincerely, she would’ve researched it enough that she would’ve been able to find some sort of vanilla source that would’ve worked.” says God.

“ would you still just wear vanilla?” says Casi.

“ yes I would but people are sick of it I don’t wanna be offensive it’s fun to express myself using different perfumes, but I think to be honest that probably is my favorite fragrance to smell like other than maybe some more costly perfumes and no I do it it’s just vanilla I like the smell of just vanilla as my scent.” says Lacey.

“ love would have liked that and I have known this for many years and I have Hella hit it from all of you because I don’t want you to know the secrets of my soul. Lacey is his lover I am not apparently at all.” says JFK.

“ yeah well Jack, that’s true.” says Kasey.

“ a lot of women had the same idea as Lacey and her generation.” says a woman

“ yeah so what I like it I would’ve just found a way to make it smell good it’s not a stupid idea.” says Lacey.

“ do you have any idea how arousing the smell of vanilla is to a man?” says Elliott Roosevelt.

“ yeah I know it’s arousing so what I would’ve thought. No it’s just my scent is my thing and I would’ve just made it. Smell good.” says Lacey.

“ what else? OK that’s actually really funny. What else would you have worn?” says Jeremy Fragrance.

“Platine by Dana, probably Dana Emir, definitely Chanel No. 5, and then I would’ve started smelling more expensive perfume and I would’ve decided that I didn’t like it. No I like it but I’m sort of I like being independent and so I wouldn’t have wanted to wear it. I probably I probably would have loved Chanel number five regardless. And I would have definitely appreciate it others, like crêpe de Chine, a Guerlain Shalimar, and other Guerlain fragrances, probably lots of things like that. I would’ve liked Vent Vert… I would’ve liked probably Miss Balmain. I would’ve liked him put a few different fragrances ummm… but I would’ve gotten sick of the whole thing and I would’ve thought no I’m just going to wear vanilla I’m just going to wear straight vanilla.” says Lacey.

“ do you think I’m going to be sexy or not?” says Jeremy Fragrance.

“ I think to myself, ‘Oh men find that sexy…I guess???’” says Lacey.

“That’s NOT YOU!!!” yells Jeremy.

“No. That’s insane. That is me.” says Lacey.

“She’s right. That’s her.” says God.

“ Did did my story offend you when I told people about how I had a friend I who was wearing vanilla all the time and someone said oh you are where vanilla or no that’s not how it went it was she was asked by bunch of guys what she was wearing because she was so sexy And she said oh vanilla it’s my favorite fragrance. That’s all I ever wear. It’s my signature fragrance?” says Franny.

“ I thought you were dumb as fuck.” says Lacey.

“ how good is the sex between her and Putin?” says Suzanne.

“ we don’t keep track of that kind of thing that’s not our priority.” says America.

“ Harold, how good is she compared to Brett Ashley?” says a Native American woman.

“ I love how you just jumped in there to say that I’m not really Jack I am a demon controlling bits and pieces of his leftover energy. I’m making you say that I’m tempting you to be egotistical and you’re choosing to.” says a demon controlling JFK’s residual energy so people can talk to it.

“ there are actual ghosts stop making such quick assumptions.” says God.

“ I mean I’m not gonna even really give you a good answer because I don’t want to. They’re both a ten in different ways.” says Harold.

“ Harold, who is a 10 in the way that I mean!?” says the woman.

“ Lacey obviously.” he says.

“ i’m not gonna talk about it either.” says Putin.

“ so she’s not like a man at all she’s just like Hedy, Lamarr and Marilyn Monroe combined?” says Jeremy.

“ no she’s herself get a fucking grip!” says Satan in frustration.

“ yeah, I suppose men do like vanilla.” says Franny.

“yes, obviously they were all hitting on her.” says Lacey.

“ you’re not funny that is true. It’s kind of a stupid story.” says Alisha.

“ no I felt embarrassed for you and then I thought no what a bitch or that woman was a bitch and I couldn’t figure out what was going on so I tried paying attention to you and I came to the conclusion that you might just have been a stupid bitch.” says Lacey.

“ i’m trying to imagine meeting you with you wearing high heels a long skirt made of wool nylons and a tight cashmere sweater with your hair up perfectly and pearl earrings with red lipstick wearing vanilla.” says Bill.

“ yeah and this is why she has no fucking clue because that’s what dip shits in your generation say to her. What would you get from that if you couldn’t read minds like a normal human being can’t!?” says Lem.

Franny laughs.

“ I am yeah, Bill Bill what are you even suggesting I don’t understand.” says a woman.

“ that can’t be true. Lacey is a whore. She slept with my husband for his money. She knows so much she hast to be stopped.” says Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy.

“ sweetie she was never going to get any money from your husband that’s insane.” says the CIA.

“ no these women are all up to something and he doesn’t even want it.” says Rose.

“Then how is he sleeping with them?” asks God.

“ I don’t know yet! I haven’t figured that out…all these years.” says Rose.

“ I don’t think she would’ve ever been involved with your husband sweetie if you hadn’t fooled her.” says God.

“ I mean vanilla is really sexy??” says Jeremy.

“ what the fuck!?” says a dead man.

Lacey kills a mouse.

“I stabbed.” says Lacey. “Lem helped.”

“It was stuck on a trap.” says Lem.

“ I can’t kill mice otherwise. I feel too bad for them.” says Lacey.

“ I bet you talk to them Lacey.” says a reader.

“ yes I hope that some of them are in heaven.” says Lacey.

“ and they are.” says God.

“ they’re really very loving animals if you get the right with the right group really if you find the right if you find the right mouse at the right time you find out that they’re actually quite quite nice.” says Lacey.

“ oh, how smart are mice?” says a Jew.

“ they’re extremely smart.” says Harold.

“ I think they understand English potentially.” says Lacey.

“ could they be spying on us?” says the CIA.

“ they communicate with other creatures dogs are smart cats are smart, but they’re creatures they’re not like humans.” says God.

“ you guys this is getting really dumb. Lacey is sexy. She doesn’t understand what that means because no one tells her she likes vanilla I’m actually not that surprised and yeah cats are smart. Wow this is really some thing. Other than finding out that spicy ramen is apparently really good from Korea and that it’s good with eggs and green onions and hopefully some thing that Donald Trump has learned and finding out that King Charles swears I don’t know what the point of this blog post was.” says Casi.

“ yeah, she likes vanilla fields.” says a woman in Sweden.

“ yes she does. She also liked Kashmir by Shapard and Shalamar has a little bit of a vanilla in it, so did Chanel 22. I am baffled as to why we’re still talking either but that’s kind of where things are right now.” says Elliott.

“ I am not straight.” says Jeremy.

“ are you joking Jeremy or are you actually trying to come out of the closet right now?” says Franny.

“ i’m trying to be honest.” says Jeremy.

Silence.

“ OK I will. I’m gonna be honest I was in love with you.” says Bill Rhea to Lacey.

His wife laughs.

“ do you love your wife more?” says Lacey.

“ yes!” he says.

“ OK wow are you OK?” says Lacey.

“SHIT!!” says JFK.

“ that’s not the way she was supposed to respond!!” says a huge group of dead people in Saint Paul.

“ according to who!?” says God.

“ the demons that told us stuff!” they say.

“ why the fuck would you be dumb enough to trust a demon? What the fuck is wrong with you people!?” says Lacey.

“ what was she supposed to say?” says Becca.

“ she was supposed to have said, ‘Oh my gosh what Bill!? I had no idea!’ or something like that.” says Jack.

“ does that seem like something she’d say??” says God.

“ she’s very feminine though, and we can tell that.” they say.

“ yes but does that seem like something she say!?” says God.

“ no but we liked that we were surprised by it, and it seemed helpful to us and our evil.” they say.

“ why do you know at least he’s right why the hell would that be good thing you’re in Purgatory do you have brain still or not!?” says a living Catholic.

“ yeah we’re all narcissists OK but we’re narcissists from the early 1900s so we aren’t as bad as most of the people alive today.” they say.

“ so you just thought that that was helpful to you?” she says.

“ we are not ready to receive that part of our salvation yet we are OK we received it, but we’re working through this with God and Jack tempted us to be evil, and we accidentally took the bait.” they say.

“ I mean, what are you allowed to do then?” she says.

“ we can’t harm children demons do, but we can’t demons do with the living not with the dead so dead children are safe living ones are not a weak or able to harm ourselves, were able to harm other adults, and where you can just choose to get rid of whatever is wrong with you, but we are just not at that point everyone’s path is different and we just aren’t there. That’s purgatory to be honest with our repentance. This has been helpful to us cause we’re learning that we can do serious harm, even if it seems innocent. so we regret it to at least some degree.” they say.

“ yeah, I was in love with you!” says Bill to Lacey.

“ OK so that’s good I guess in a way that’s good. Hopefully you didn’t suffer too much.” says Lacey.

“ yeah, I’m married now to someone who I love more but no it was actually a little hard on me.“ says Bill.

“ why was it hard on you?” says Lacey.

“ I’m starting to get mad at you, I really am.” says Bill’s wife to Lem.

“ because it just seemed so difficult to get you to notice that I was in love with you. And I just felt incredibly angry that you were in capable of understanding my feelings. I had no way of expressing to you how I felt because I just knew you’d be a big a big softy or you’d be a bitch or I guess I just assume that we just start passionately making love and I had no idea that would be your reaction.” says Bill.

“ did you actually suffer though like did you emotionally suffer?” says Lacey.

“ yes.” he says.

“ how much did you suffer?” says Lacey.

“ on a scale of 1 to 10 about an eight???” he says

“ did anyone else know!?” says Lacey.

“ oh, shit you’re not who I thought you were.

Yes, I told people.” says Bill.

“ OK that’s sad. I’m sorry you suffered so much. Why didn’t you try like pursuing me more?” says Lacey.

“ because I don’t have the guts to do that.” says Bill.

“ then why were you expecting it to work out?” says Lacey.

“because you’re in love with me.” he says.

“ no, I was repulsed by you you’re very short!” says Lacey. “ but if you tried to pursue me, I might have taken you seriously I don’t. I did go on that something with you and I would have thought well maybe I should just get over the fact that he’s short and that that repulses me because it actually does I would love a 6 foot four and I’m with him for eternity you’re very short to me.

Sweetie, my twin flame is 6 foot four. You’re short to me to me you are extraordinarily short it’s repulsive. but I would have gotten over it if you had pursued me and you did not do that I wouldn’t have wanted to be with you for eternity, but I wouldn’t or even maybe to get married but I would’ve considered dating you if you if you would pursued me because you were an intelligent person, and you seem to have character.” says Lacey.

“ did you think I was better looking?” says David.

“ oh my goodness yes definitely but you were taken. I liked your personality more to, but you were taken. But Maggette but but but like I mean, but but but who the fuck am I talking to Bill but Bill you actually are good looking you’re just short for me and obviously lots of girls found you very attractive. I just didn’t find you that attractive.” says Lacey.

“ I did not necessarily know that at all.” says Bill.

“ well, I mean I like talking to you. You are a very fun person to talk to, but I was definitely not in love with you absolutely not not at all.” says Lacey.

“ was there anyone who you were really in love with?” says Joanna from the library.

“ no oh hell, no oh fuck no no Jack ruined my entire fucking life. There was a young mad at you in de name Joel, who I could’ve dated, but I think other than him there probably may have actually been almost nobody my entire fucked up miserable life.” says Lacey.

“ yeah, I did that to her it was it was a reward for Lem shooting me in the head!” says JFK.

“ are you trying to be funny or is that really something you feel the need to say right now?” says a psychic.

“ he he doesn’t actually exist because he went so far off the deep end with his evil, that he actually genuinely temporary does not exist. I think that that was just something he should have said.” says Lacey.

Silence.

“ well, I’ve just been holding out hope this whole time that line was gay and that I was better than her. I’ve got to be honest.” says Diego mocking Bobby.

“ so there was nobody at Messiah who you were really genuinely in love with because there are people who you thought you were in love with, but they turned out to be different than you thought they were going we’re going to be and then you ended up just being totally alone. And then you were in your 20s and that was it really matter to you. Did you ever think of killing yourself?” says Joanna.

“ yes I did. I thought about going and killing myself, but I couldn’t figure out how to do it appropriately and most importantly, I thought it was wrong. And I just thought it was a bad idea in general.” says Lacey.

“ why the fuck is Poland so important?” says Joanna.

“ no Vladimir Putin would’ve been fine without Lacey. It’s nice but no that was not necessary for him to do well.” says God.

“ Poland is important for strategic purposes, Joanna thanks so much.” says Lem.

“you literally she literally never ran into anybody anywhere!?” says a living gay man.

“ no other than Joel there really has been absolutely nobody.” says God. “ I rarely make people cease to exist. Jack’s abuse of his love from me is off the charts. And he’s one of the most vile humans I’ve ever created, and all of eternity. It was psychotic to think that Lem could be genuinely in a loving relationship with him at all. Most living adult people today, including you have a perverse sense of superiority. Jack ruined her life. He prevented her from ever meeting anybody he was absolutely obsessed with destroying her. Why would he go after her and not lamb because going after Lem would make him feel weak. Going after Lem’s would make him feel weak because Lem’s is mad and he doesn’t want to sink that lamb was actually responsible for rejecting him so it’s like oh no, no no no let’s technically was the one who actually rejected me, but Lacey is the one who really thought of the idea somehow it isn’t really sane Because we can’t control other peoples thoughts to that degree but Lamb was very confused and he was very controlling of him and manipulative and he came to the conclusion that Lacey would’ve had to have been 10 times worse because he thought he was better than her right off the bat The first time he even knew she could vaguely exist probably before that he’s insanely obsessed with being superior to her. And he’s made other people experience the same thing, even though it isn’t the same delusion because they’re not the same person as him. But he’s given them the same sort of view of her, even though they have a view of her that way for totally different reasons, but he’s been able to sort of make the whole thing coagulate and keep together through a lot of demonic activity. But no, he assumed that he was better than her that she had done some thing really terrible and then he thought you know, I’m going to find a way to hold her accountable for everything that she did to me and in the process of doing that, he began to realize that it wasn’t likely that she was actually at fault Because it just started making sense and that’s for some people hope that he would stop and leave her alone and that was in the 1990s. But instead of doing that, he got incredibly evil. He started telling people that he was basically a superhero with super powers sexually and otherwise.

It is funny it’s sad but it’s funny. Why did he start doing that? Because he realized that line was just better than him that Linn was taller than him and smarter than him and kinder, and you know the whole, the whole gamit. Because he realize that Lacey really was kind of superior to most women. She was developing her beauty more, and she was developing her intelligence more, and he realize that she was better than almost any woman that he’d ever slept with if not all of them. And so his reaction to that was to just give up on God in life almost entirely, because he just thought fine if I can’t be better than Lem then I give up. because he became obsessed with being better than her but originally he actually had a desire to be better than that which is why he was homosexually obsessed with him. So he thought this guy is vulnerable. He’s confused, but he’s better than me, and I’m going to use the fact that he’s confused as a noose around his neck to slowly strangle him to death and laugh at him while I do it. He was a heartless psychopath to some degree, but mostly he was just a heartless, narcissist, with psychotic violent tendencies at times, he never killed anybody but some of his ancestors dead, and he had it in him to be a serial killer, but he never was one.

People alive today if I’m hearing this offensive because they’re dumb. they’ve been dumb down.

 So he became obsessed with her, and he decided to destroy her because somehow by doing that he could convince himself that Lem’s actually had been in love with him the whole time, and that he really was defending them as a couple from this hideous bitch. He thought that he may have just lost his mind, and that somehow, if he got rid of her or made her ceased to exist or just tormented her that eventually she’d come around and tell him the truth, that you know, she plotted the entire thing from a past life or some thing, and that really, you know he was just a victim of her. He was one of the best men davit live, that he never had sex with anyone hardly ever including lamb, because he was like chased British lord, living in an Irishman‘s body he imagined himself as lab. Basically, Haslem could be living in an iron in an Irishman’s body, who is just a terribly misunderstood and lived a terrible life because he was so loving and saint like never swore never smoke never would’ve cheated on his wife, if you keep me a thought, he didn’t even have one that he was basically just a celibate Monk living in the White House briefly he was delusional absolutely delusional.” says God.







“We’re not related. The Illuminati told Lacey in 2019 that you and I were related!” yells a woman in Connecticut. “They said that we were distant relations and that I was somehow helping you. That I had some tricky way of like tracking you down or tracking her down on your behalf, rather, and it seemed possible and Lacey still isn’t completely sure, but it seemed really possible to her and right now God is demanding at least in some way demanding that I be recognized as not a member of your family.”

“I’m still not convinced that she’s not your relative!” says Lacey.

“The thing is Casi I am upper middle class. I have a Louis Vuitton handbag. I have decent clothes. I might drive an old Beamer that we owned and we make about a joint income of about $110,000.00 year.  You’re not in my class. I am upper middle class, like just at the very bottom of the upper middle class in all honesty and you’re a poor person from the south. 

And Bobby Kennedy Junior decided for me because he’s basically bankrupt that I was supposed to somehow I feel sorry for you and that Lacey was just an icky poopy head. Because he’s bankrupt and he’s gay at least somewhat and he has a psychotic fixation on them and he’s not normal in his head and so he decided that I would feel sorry for you and so we should pretend that we were related. And because of his issues in the Illuminati they they take him way too seriously and so she got confused and thought that I was actually related to you and she blocked me and I have felt weird ever since spiritually because I got cursed.” she says.

“Your mother did not wear the perfume that you claim she did. She didn’t even have a favorite perfume. Your mother was never into perfume Casi until you decided she should be.” says one of that lady’s relatives.

“Your mother wore perfume based on her mood and whatever was available. You lied about that in the perfume community for years before Lacey was ever even in the community.” says another one of that lady’s relatives.

“My mother and I are poor, and my mother is not a lesbian like Lacey‘s mother, who raised her, but I am somewhat of a lesbian.” admits Casi.

“But then Laceys a lesbian too obviously! I mean, come on!!!” yells Bobby.

“No I’m not one! Obviously! You’re psychotically fixated.” says Lacey.

“Bobby she has rejected hundreds of advances of women! You’ve witnessed that. Why the fuck do you even think she has to be a lesbian!?” says the CIA.

“Because there’s no possible way that that Casi could’ve been that interested in her without it being mutual that’s impossible.” says Bobby.

“ oh, no, that’s bullshit and you’re actually dissolving human rights by insisting that body that’s completely bullshit. There is something to be sad for the mutual nature of love, but there are a lot of psychologist who’s been totally fucked up about that one for decades well-intentioned or not because they don’t understand pedophilia they don’t understand sex, or the nature of consent, and that’s where psychology has become useless to lots of people because they actually aren’t aware of the nature of bias in the psychologist the way that they should be even in research, they’re not actually a scientific as they pretend to be, I think God, there are some psychologist who disagree who are reputable but there is a number of usually very annoying people in my opinion who tend to think that there Hass to be this mutuality and that’s just not true Casi experiences things that are not experience by Lacey. They’re not the same being so her perception matters but it is not the ultimate perception and part of the problem is that a bunch of bitch narcissistic whores decided to take over feminism and I’m saying that is a liberal and they want to think that women don’t have a way of concerned that humans basically don’t even exist because they’re psychotic monsters who sings that they can control people when they can’t or that they can decide what isn’t isn’t real and they cat that’s not even science that’s bullshit that’s post modern narcissistic intellectual thievery of the Academy. So the truth is no there’s a lot of con artist who have emerged in the last hundred years things to America and its attempt to try to save the poor.

I’m not going to let that be Casi‘s excuse until we know for a fact that she was that well intentioned.

And so unfortunately, no Bobby, and no incorrect narcissist potentially things are not always mutually experienced which really is just common sense, but they don’t want to admit common sense anymore. They’re not living in reality in some way.

Am most likely I can’t send every single case. I thought it would flush out that way, but I’m somewhere they’re not living in reality or they’re just wrong.

But then how could you possibly be that wrong that easily but that it without being a little insane but but that’s that’s a different topic.

So the thing is that Bobby know just because Casi experience a sexual desire for Lacey, does not mean that Lacey automatically is experiencing sexual desire for for Casi but that is the nature of meeting one person may reject someone else in a very authentic way.

So that’s where heartbreak comes from Bobby and love yeah that’s why your wife hung herself. That’s why your wives get hurt by you because they actually experience love for you that’s real that you’re not experiencing that still matters even though you’re in the illuminati and they’re not necessarily in the same way.

And that’s where the CA totally blew it last night because they don’t seem to understand the actual scientific nature of objective reality they’re living in a post modern day Loulou bubble.

I am so unfortunately I’m gonna have to stop taking you seriously right now Bobby because you’re full of shit and you’re insane on this issue.

So Casi had feelings of desire and interest in Lacey that Lacey did not have for her just as Lem may have had no interest of any nature in you, Bobby, and you were very fascinated by him.

Casi, I think you did have a crush on Lacey could you at least admit that?” says someone in the Illuminati.

“ no!” says Casi.

“ OK but by saying that you’re actually admitting that it was real for you.” says a woman.

“ so what!?” says Casi.

“ so then we’ve got you you’re actually admitting to it you’re actually admitting to it Casi, but with no dignity.” says the Illuminati.

“ why could you know what I really believe that Lacey actually did reject you and that she wasn’t even aware that you were all that interested but why can’t you just let Lacey have that it may not be that big of an otter but it’s a little bit of an honor why can’t you just let her have that!?” says a man reading her blog.

“ because that’s mine!!” says Casi.

“ no if you choose to act on it if you choose to tell her or really anybody Casi that you’re attracted to them or looking for sex, you no longer have that that’s like basic hermeneutics.” says Dr. Moritz.

“ so we can debate and hermeneutics what actually matters but because of the sort of social nature of human interactions, and our spiritual nature is beings when you give information out to the public Casi and the way that you did when you hit on me publicly on my Instagram account when I first started talking to you I mean I don’t think I’ve had. I don’t even know if I’d ever talk to you that might’ve been the first thing you ever said to me I think you might’ve liked one or two of my posts and then you might’ve commented and hit on me, and so I think Casi if that matters that was the first thing you’ve ever said to me possibly and you did it publicly so because of the spiritual nature of things, because of the the context of sort of the human interaction in a matter of social interactions and social functions of humanity what you did matters.” says Lacey.

“ but you rejected me and it was embarrassing.” says Casi.

“ so what!?” says a straight man.

“ I agree we’re not your babysitter?? I mean it is absolutely repulsive Casi that you can’t just be embarrassed!?” says Lacey.

“ because I don’t want to be embarrassed! I refuse to be embarrassed!” says Casi.

Jan laughs.

“Why didn’t you hit on me!?” says Marjolijn.

“ I did!! I definitely did!!” says Casi.

“ I didn’t get it!” says Marjolijn.

“ did you hit on me!?” says Shaveydavy.

“ kind of.” says Casi.

“ you know I found that really offensive. but I was also somewhat confused by it.” says Shaveydavy. 

“ that’s fine!!” says Casi.

“ no, it’s not fine!” says Lacey involuntarily.

“ no, it’s fine!” says Casi.

“ this is where the pandemic came from.” Sara China.

“ I don’t like the fact that she’s doing that to them. Why do they choose not to give a shit!?” says Lacey.

“ what happens if I don’t care!?” says Shaveydavy.

“ well old sport, you could end up killed or you could end up choking to death I mean it’s not good.” says Will Smith.

“ I didn’t you were offended one second ago, and then the next minute you’re not offended why??” says Lacey.

Ting Ma Ma De Hua by Jay Chou plays as Saoirse tries desperately to seem cool. She walks up to Bobby lip-synching.

“Why are you still trying to make it work?” says Lem.

“Because he wasn’t my uncle in his last life if there’s reincarnation, he was just a hot Chinese guy!” says Saoirse.

“Actually, that was the life before the last life Saoirse.” says a woman.

“OK!???” she says.

“But he was your uncle when you met him Saoirse.” says God. “Regardless.”

“So what!??” says Saoirse.

“So he’s your uncle. He’s not just some hot Chinese guy.” says God.

A reader laughs.

“No, that’s a con game! That is a con game!” says Saoirse.

“No, Saoirse that’s the nature and the fabric of the universe, whether you personally acknowledge that or not.” says God.

“You know what? I’m willing to talk but I’m a little lost.” says Saoirse. “Because I would like to think that I could have a hot Asian boyfriend and I knew that Bobby was interested in me, so why wasn’t I supposed to just go for that?” 

“Well because he’s your uncle!” says God.

“But I would never be able to get a hot Asian boyfriend who is as wealthy as my uncle or as smart, who is also a Kennedy at the same time.” says Saoirse.

“No but that’s just the nature of how things are.” says God.

“No that’s a con job, because bad things don’t exist.” says Saoirse.

“No, evil is real Saoirse.” says God.

“ I have a problem I’m trying to get prestige for my family but I was trying to find a way to bring it into the family so if I sleep with Bobby, I get the hot Asian guy and then if I marry somebody else I get that too and then I just get more because our family is running out of prestige. It’s running out of money, so I was thinking this would be a really clever way of like funneling it back in if someone illegal but I thought maybe it would work because he was Asian and I I might find Asian men kind of attractive. So that’s my thought that was possibly my thought. I mean if he did what you called molest me and I guess maybe it’s molestation because I still have nightmares about it even on the other side but I was watching the soul Olympics with him or watching figure skating like pairs, like couples, figure skating, and then that’s when it happened oh and then that’s the problem so I was really aroused by women no, I mean I was really aroused by men and I was really aroused by an Asian man and then Bobby revealed himself to me in a hot tub as an actual Asian in person and I thought oh this is like the coolest thing ever because he had been grooming me they call it but I don’t acknowledge that so then I thought no this is this is the moment when I really bring in the Dell Because I’ve got an Asian here and I am thinking about Asian men and I am a sophisticated elite so if I can just hook up with Bobby because he’s Asian then somehow I can get the double up so to speak you know like I pop the balloons, and I get all the tiles in order so to speak and then we finally got some traction and our family And we finally will get back on track so that was my thought but then the problem is that I am Dad because I lost my mind and I kept having nightmares and Bobby never came through.” says Saoirse.

“ what do you mean Bobby never came through?” says God.

“ because he refused to accept me as an Asian and he still rejects me. I catch him sometimes being Asian either because there’s a demon involved who’s fooling people into thinking there’s reincarnation or because he’s actually Asian and when he does that he just ignores me now.” says Saoirse.

“ so then you don’t get the double up you don’t get the tiles in order because he’s blowing you off now?” says a psychic.

“yes there’s no way to get the double up there’s no way to to get the tiles in order because he never acknowledges me. He just keeps blowing me off.” says Saoirse.

“ what would even happen though, if he did acknowledge you?” says a woman.

“ I mean I don’t know, but if I was molested, then I should get something because that I’m still a victim and that’s my right then as a victim to get something.” says Saoirse.

“ but did you know what you were doing sweetie? Did you do you did you turn yourself into a victim to try to trick God?” asks the Illuminati.

“ yes I did but I thought that it would work, because I’m still technically apparently voting to him a victim?” says Saoirse.

“ no you just are a victim but Saoirse trying to trick him might mean that you get nothing.” says an angel.

“ I still think that if I’m a victim at all, I should get something from his Asian heritage.” says Saoirse.

“ no, no you don’t search up if you were trying to trick me given the nature of the situation no, you would not get anything.” says God.

Saoirse looks sad.

“ but then I mean, how are you supposed to hack it? How do you supposed to do the shit!?” says Saoirse. “ because I was totally psychologically impaired. I had huge, psychological problems. I was having a hard time, keeping a stable relationship with anyone of any value, but I was the best looking person in my generation, and then I am’s like supposed to bring some thing into the family and I can’t fucking do that and it’s like what was I supposed to do which is part of the reason why I killed myself to you it’s like I’m not producing anything I am of no value to my family.” says Saoirse.

“ yeah and that’s your fault you dirty whore!” says Bobby.

“ hi Bobby, I did not cheat on you. I did not cheat on you.” says Saoirse.

“She did.” says one of her friends.

“ no because he actually cheated on me first.” says Saoirse.

“ that’s not true!” says Bobby panicking.

“ no I know you did. I have evidence now that I’m dead I have evidence.” says Saoirse.

“ and this is why I want to end the world.” says Lacey.

“ oh, so don’t don’t worry about that!” says Casi.

“ i’m not worried!!” says Marjolijn.

“ what is the thing is Casi you’re in a similar relationship with those people that Bobby is in with Saoirse.” says the CIA

“ that is possibly correct.” says Lacey.

“ which is why I spoke up and said something even if it seems offensive because apparently I’m exercising some privilege over Chevy, Davie and Marshall and that they don’t like him. I was actually trying to sound like potentially protect that so I guess they don’t want that, but then what are they going to do?” says Lacey.

“ they don’t need your protection at all!” says Casi.

“ why is that Casi?” says a woman.

“ because I’ve got oil wells!” says Casi sincerely.

“ how are you going to take her oil wells Casi?” says Dennis.

“ through the power of Jesus Christ!!” says Casi.

“ you’re trying to use the illuminati witchcraft and Jesus combined to get the oil wells from her whole family?” says a reader.

“ no I’m trying to use Jesus Christ!” says Casi.

“ the illuminati is using you to attack her family.” says the FBI.

“ and it’s impossible. It’s spiritually completely impossible. They’ll destroy the entire world before they’ll actually be able to do it. That’s how far-fetched and stupid this whole concept is sincerely.” says Dennis.

“DUH!!” says Queen Elizabeth I.

“ who thought that made sense!?” says a reader.

“ MSNBC and Diego’s secret boyfriend.” says the CIA.

“ and you guys are still doing that!?” says a reader.

“ yes because Diego is a divine revelation!” says an Old Money white man.

“ oh, no, he was not!” says Dennis.

“ I saw Jesus when I was hallucinating seven times when I was with him I took acid twice and once in the bedroom and six times in the living room, I saw a hallucination of Jesus when I was with Diego and he said to me you are you are you are he said you are you are you are!” says the Old Money man.

“ you are what!?!?” says Dennis.

“ I don’t think I should have to ask. I think I should be able to sense in my spirit exactly as it is as it is.” he says.

“ but he’s a he’s he’s telling you something he was trying to tell you something I’m almost sure if it!” says Dennis.

“ don’t you dare try to convert me back to your religiously false Republican close minded way of thinking!” he says to Dennis Anderson.

“ but fax or facts?” says Dennis.

“ no you’re clever too bad you’re not attracted to men.” says the Old Money man.

“ let’s stick to the topic, though that’s not really related.” says Dennis.

“ I can’t tell if you’re bisexual or straight!?!?” he says.

“ that’s not relevant. I’m not interested in having sex with you.” says Dennis.

“ no, you are you’re very attracted to me I’m an incredibly attractive person.” he says.

“ I don’t find you attractive regardless, let’s stick to the topic.” says Dennis.

“ that is the topic Dennis! Sex is always the topic it’s a hack I picked up.” he says.

“ no it’s not. Was your mother a whore?” says Dennis.

“ yes actually!” he says.

“ then you’re thinking like your mother not like your father that’s not the topic that we’re discussing I’m sorry to be so harsh.” Dennis says.

“It has to be. I can’t possibly think this through without that as my guide.” he says.

“ but that’s not what we’re talking about. We’re talking about the fact that you’re delusional and thinking that Jesus will be saying exactly what you want him to say.” says Dennis. “ when you hear something you have to be open to being completely obliterated or rejected because it’s the supernatural and you don’t know enough which is why you should be doing it because you don’t really know what’s being said and your way of interpreting it is going to be to protect yourself, and then you’re gonna end up hearing the wrong thing, there are some people in distress like children who are being molested or attacked or who are uncomfortable at all in anyway and then there are some people like Lacey, who are adults who are suffering immensely who may actually be able to talk to the supernatural and have grace for the horror, horrific nature of the entire thing, but you’re not engaging with it in that way you’re not in distress like a child or like Lacey you are trying to garner information and that’s necromancy and you’re not really engaging with it in a way of comprehension. You’re engaging with it in a very silly way.” says Dennis.

“ yeah, I suppose that could be true.” he says.

“ then you shouldn’t probably be doing it but you’re doing it and you’re getting confused.” says Dennis.

“ how did you just turn into my father and I my mom if my guide book is wrong?” he says.

“ Because that’s the nature of the conversation even if your guidebook is right a lot, it doesn’t actually work and so it can each of the conversation as such that I’ve become almost a protector of you but um, it’s still a faulty guidebook.” says Dennis

“ it’s possible that Jesus really was actually just telling me something else.” says the man.

“ I think he might’ve been trying to tell you that you are old money.” says a perfume collector.

“ I was also hallucinating and Diego did say to me you’re not like her and he did say you are right after that.” he admits.

“ so then why wasn’t he responding to you in the conversation?” says a perfume collector.

“ because I think I figured that it was him not that because I am part of a crowd of people who don’t like her and I just assume that because Jesus and I are best friends that he would never say anything like that because I just assumed that he would like her either.” he says.

“ how are you and Jesus best friends?” says the Pope.

“ thankfully with me it’s not consciously sexual. I’m not that crazy thank God. But I have gone to some charismatic church services and I may have gotten a little confused because I’m not a heterosexual.” he says. “ but I think I thought we were friends I had it in my head.”

What A Friend We Have In Jesus as sang by Merle Haggard plays.

“He bears it all for us, so we ain’t gotta do shit!?” says Lacey.

“No this is a very anti-catholic song but I don’t think it’s intentional.” says God.

The song plays.

“What fucking world is this man live in!?” says Lacey as a Christian.

“I completely agree. As a child who is being held hostage in the US who just recently died. I am glad to be dead. This song is fucking shit!” says the dead child.

“Hey Dolly, you want to get it on with Merle Haggard!?” says Lacey, jokingly and mockingly.

“Why can’t you interpret it like you just pray and then you get grace for what you’re going through!!?” says an angry white woman.

“Because that’s not reality!

At times if you’re being sadistically tortured, you might actually experience the torture.

If the person torturing you is good enough at it and you go to sleep sweetie you wake up you don’t instantly think, ‘I’m praying to Christ!’ fast enough they’re going to get you because everyone has a childhood. Everyone has a parent who wasn’t perfectly nice to them in some way and if the Illuminati exists and they can sadistically torture you how the fuck are you supposed to use Jesus constantly!? You end up going brain dead.” says Lacey.

“And because that doesn’t happen!!” screams JFK, with a Japanese accent.

Swing Low Sweet Chariot as sang by Merle Haggard plays.

“I’m a pervert sexually it’s true. You can hear it in my voice, I constantly wanted to get laid.” confesses Merle Haggard.

“Jack just said that that doesn’t happen so that must be true. He’s our guide so you have to respond to him.” says a huge portion of the Illuminati.

“No that does happen. Absolutely it happens. It happens in war Jack it happened many times in Vietnam.” says Lacey.

Suppertime by Merle Haggard plays.

“OK fine maybe that’s true! I’ve been told by people that they’re going to cut off my head even though I miss digital energy because I’m so offensive to them.” says JFK.

“Vietnam vets, Jack?” says Bobby. “I’ll kick their ass!” 

“How are you going to kick the ass of dead Vietnam veterans Bobby!?” says the Illuminati.

“I’m just gonna do it y’all! I’m just gonna fucking do it!” says Bobby.

1:33

“OK well that’s nonsense.

He’s not going to be able to do that and no unfortunately as much as people love music like this, I don’t think Jesus is our friend necessarily in the way that Merle Haggard sings he is.” says Lacey.

“That ain’t true! That true! I am a conservative Republican Democrat liberal Catholic…and this music is good!” says Bill Rhea.

“No it’s not. It’s not necessarily good at all.” says Lacey.

“Did you have fun on that date that I tried to take you on with David and his girlfriend?” says Bill Rhea.

“Was that even a date!?” says Lacey.

“There are lots of kids, Bill, who are suffering and they’re innocent children and they’d rather be dead.” says a dead child.

“Youseriously did not realize that that was a date!?” he says.

Why Me as sang by Merle Haggard plays.

The child is whisked away by God. From the conversation.

“No, I did not realize that!” says Lacey. “I thought it might possibly be one but not necessarily.” 

“I mean what was I supposed to do!? Tell you that we were on a date!?” he says.

“Are you serious?!?!” says Lem.

“Hey, yes I am completely serious.” says Bill Rhea.

“Then how was she supposed to know?” says Lem.

The song ends.

Like Spinning Plates by Radiohead plays.

Merle Haggard is blown away into the air…up into a cloud of dust. Sucked away by God. Into a vacuum. To be dealt with.

…

“Is he in Purgatory?” asks Lacey.

“Yes.” says a being. “He’s not in Hell.”

“If that’s true, that’s good. I don’t want him to be harmed more than he should be.” says Lacey.

“I’d that Lem’s heterosexuality the way that he’s coming on to people?” asks a witch.

“Yes but there were other men in my generation who are like that as well but that’s part of the reason it’s so offensive to Lacey is that she knows that it’s very possible that he was a pervert.” says Lem.

“I like this, this is refreshing!” says a witch.

“Why don’t-

Putin why don’t you just kill more kids? I’m completely serious. I think you should just kill more of the kids that are being held hostage. Just blow them up, choke them to death, because they’re going to be better off that than adults anyway and I think you should just do that.” says a Christian in America.

The song plays.

0:53

The song plays.

“I can’t be silenced. I am too damn angry about Bobby cutting out on our deal!” says Saoirse.

“Did you guys cut into her energy or the air around her?” asks a witch.

“It’s actually not her. They’ve been looking for her to try to torture her, but they didn’t actually find her. They found a lot of other stuff around her.” says Lem. “And they are perpetually angry about it because it never makes sense to them.” 

“They’re a cult essentially. They’re like a pseudo-intellectual once grand now bourgeois at best, cult.” says the FBI about the Illuminati in the last 30 years or so.

“That was my fault! OK fine!” says JFK.

3:31

The song ends.

“I don’t see why I would’ve had to tell you that we were on a date!” says Bill Rhea.

“Because she doesn’t know otherwise!” says Lem.

Silence.

“That was supposed to woo you.” says Bill.

“You made love to the sandwich!” says Lacey.

“Yes, I did call my roast beef sandwich, juicy and sexy!” says Bill.

“Yes exactly!” says Lacey.

“That’s a…cute…come on.” he says.

“I’m not a sandwich.” says Lacey.

“True!” says David.

“I mean it’s just a sandwich Bill.” says his wife.

“Exactly!!” says Lacey.

“Were you jealous of my sandwich!?” says Bill.

“It’s a sandwich!” says Lacey.

“Do you understand what we’re talking about?!?” says Bill.

“We’re talking about a date where you made sexual innuendos about a sandwich.” says Lacey.

“No we’re talking about your vagina.” says Bill.

“My vagina is not a sandwich Bill.” says Lacey.

“If I was a woman, I would want my vagina to be compared to a sandwich.” says Bill.

His wife laughs.

“What the fuck!?” says Vladimir Putin.

“I mean you don’t wanna digest my vagina in your stomach. You don’t eat somebody! You wouldn’t want to actually eat someone with your teeth.” says Lacey.

Lem laughs.

“OK that’s true.” says Bill.

“And I didn’t think you’d make a sexual innuendo that was so sloppy or I thought that if you did you were clearly just rejecting me sadistically.” says Lacey.

“He’s not serious!” says his wife.

“Why risk it!?” says Lacey.

“For me it was worth it.” says his wife.

“It wasn’t for me.” says Lacey.

“She was out of my league.” admits Bill.

“Then why did you do the date that way? Unless if you meant for it to fail!?” says Lacey.

“I hear you!!” says his wife.

“Because I thought that somehow you were faking being rich.” says Bill Rhea.

“Even if I was, how was I doing it?” says Lacey.

“It’s a stylistic issue!” says the Old Money man.

“He’s got it!” says Lacey.

“What!?” says Bill.

“Sweetie if you wanted to out her you’d have to actually do that. Who the fuck did you think she was?!?” says the Old Money man.

Lacey laughs.

“No, I mean I could think of a of a sketch in my head where if I was actually fake you could’ve outed me, but that was not anything more than a horrendous insult.” says Lacey.

“I mean she’s right, so she’s not a butch woman or a whore or a Russian prostitute-

So if I suspected she was fake but I am so much fake myself but if I suspected she was fake I would probably have taken her sailing and said do you know how to say Lacey? Why doesn’t your elite family teach you how to sail? And if she was actually elite being herself, she’d be incredibly flustered and I hear about it 5 to 10 years later probably on Valentine’s Day if I really screwed up but if she was actually fake money but she’s not she’d probably realize what that I was onto her slightly and she start showing that, but what about what was an animal you might think old taking her sailing is a butch thing it’s not sweetie Lacey loves the water. I love the water she actually would love sailing although she worries she gets seasick and she might but she would’ve tried to enjoy it anyway because she likes it so much that’s not Butch that’s being a well versed person in reality. There are plenty of very feminine Irish women who like to sell, there are plenty of very feminine women who live next to the ocean. Who sale did you think because she was interested in politics, that she somehow be butch!?” says Joe Kennedy Junior.

“ you know I think what it is is that I copied you and Jack and I think my father doesn’t understand that I can be such a little hooligan.” says Bobby.

“ that’s part of what happened. Are you gonna find someone like Pat now I doubt it you’re obsessed with Lacey and Lem too Bobby.” says Joe.

“ so basically, you just told her that she was like a butch whore and that’s really how she perceived it. I don’t think that she was ever going to possibly take you seriously ever again unless if you could somehow explain yourself but no I mean what were you thinking!?” says Bill’s wife.

He smiles. “ well, how would you respond if I said that to you!?”

She laughs. “ do you think I’m butch?”

“ maybe slightly.” he says, shrugging.

“ OK but I can tell that you like me.” she says.

“ yeah, I mean he talked all about your body to me and how you exercise and that was fine but then he couple that with a lot of other very hurtful things that we weren’t friends that I had meant that much to him as a person at all that we never actually dated and that was hurtful, because I thought that I meant something to him as a person.” says Lacey.

“ so he used our actual beginning of like real love between him and I is the way to hurt you and you thought why can’t you just let us be friends?” she says.

“ yes because it was ludicrous he was clearly falling in love with you and it’s like no harm. No fault you found someone wonderful who is good looking who was clearly intelligent in someway you know to be blunt. I don’t know every what type of intelligence that she has, but she seems like she had some intelligence most likely and I just thought why would he need to to stab me in the gut right now?” she says.

“ because I thought that it made sense.” he says.

“ how does it make sense?” says his dad.

“ call fine I actually do you like my wife better than you.” he says.

“ yeah yeah so then how was what you did appropriate!?” says Lacey.

“ but I’m better off with her anyway!” he says.

“ but there’s a way to reject people without stabbing them in the gut.” says Lacey.

“ you’re more late than my wife and myself both.” he says.

“ okey-dokey what about what we’re talking about why don’t why weren’t you just nice about it!” says Lacey.

“ was there something wrong with her that night?” says David.

“ yeah it did. I smell bad. Did I look bad? What was it?” says Lacey.

“ no she has a habit of smelling. She wasn’t loved by her mother and she thinks like a warrior even though she’s a very feminine woman and so at times she didn’t wash her clothes enough at times she wore old shoes on dates because she sincerely didn’t realize that it would be a problem, she reason that people could barely smell her and that might even be somewhat true, but it’s possible that she made some mistakes.” says a man she slept with.

“ I know it wasn’t that she smelt bad.” says Bill.

“ yeah if we’re having a really gross discussion, I didn’t wash my jeans enough at times and so it’s possible that you were smelling my vagina and you thought all I’ll make a joke about it cause it’s offensive to me.” says Lacey.

“ no!” says Bill.

“ she was hoping that was true just now.” says his wife.

“

Well, I thought we were really going to get somewhere. I should have taken very better care of my clothes and it’s possible that the gay father, who raised me if he was a father at all, maybe wishes he spent far Boris Haim actually teaching me to take better care of my my clothing he did some of that, but he probably thinks he should’ve done more of it in the afterlife, he may not know about this conversation at all, though I could just be at a dead gay man who’s imagining things so never mind that.

No, I don’t think that was something. My father hurt, so no I wish that I had taken better care of myself, but I did I did take care of myself somewhat, but I do think like a warrior, so I had strategies that were possibly very ditzy, but not necessarily, so what was it that was so offensive?” says Lacey.

“ I have strategies like that too.” says Bethany from Messiah.

“ do you know talking to you? It was so helpful even though I didn’t get better grades. It was still helpful Bethany thank you.” says Lacey.

“ was she worth $200,000 to talk to you for four hours?” says Dr. Lauermann.

“ yes actually she was his messiah college condone such things or not?” says Lem.

“ yeah because it’s somewhere we under search other I’m not old money but I’m very smart and I think like her and I didn’t take showers enough because I was trying to work really hard and get good grades and I didn’t think I had time and that was the way I handle things and I also used a lot of herbal concoctions, and when I lived in New York, I talk to ghost who knocked on walls and such, and scared me when I was a small child turns out at least one or two of them actually were trying to contact her through me I was cooperating evidence of the supernatural and I’m fine, but ironically part of the reason why they did that the ones that were real goes was to try to talk to her to tell her that this is real in a sense.” says Bethany.

“ no I was trying to tell you that I was upset.” says Bill.

“ about what?!?” says Lacey.

“ I think he was trying to say that he was sexually frustrated.” translates Bethany.

“ oh, but I’m not a sandwich!” says Lacey.

“ what inspired you to say that that night?” asks the Illuminati.

“ that was me!” says JFK.

“ how would he have handled it otherwise!?” asks Lem.

“ I would have said that I was having a really nice time with you.” says Bill.

“ and I would have very carefully dated you and I don’t think we would’ve gotten married but it would’ve been interesting dating you.” says Lacey.

“ would we have slept together or not?” says Bill.

“ no!” says Lem.

“ and what would we have done?” he says.

“ you too would’ve gotten the idea in your head to go to museums in the area and you would’ve actually gone to Gettysburg and you would’ve convince David and his girlfriend to go with you on a day/overnight trip and stay at a bed-and-breakfast and his girlfriend and Lacey would’ve shared a room. Nothing sexual would’ve happened between them because Lacey is straight and she might be too and David and you would’ve shared a room and nothing would’ve happened between you, but you would’ve had a really fun time like a really fun exploring Gettysburg.” says a ghost from Gettysburg.

“ I think that sounds fun!” says David.

His girlfriend nods.

“ no I think it would’ve been fun too!” says Lacey.

“ and I would’ve still ended up with my wife!?” says Bill.

“ yes but you guys would’ve had a really genuinely fun time you would’ve had a great memory do you like good memories!?” asks his mom.

“ yes.” says Bill.

“ no I actually likes your mom and I don’t know that we would’ve ended up together as a couple forever at least but but it would’ve been fun to have met them and no I think it would’ve been fun to have visited Gettysburg. I might not have even met them, but it would’ve been fun to at least have going to Gettysburg.” says Lacey.

“ OK well I thought this would be helpful and I think it has been to some degree but Bill still not ready to deal with us yet so will have to move on.” says David.