Author Archives: L.

(July 15th, 2024 – Mid Day)

Philip Glass plays. Closing but edited by Debussy and Philip Glass and Elgar. In the future. …To be honest it’s…better. Sorry.

A few years ago Queen Elizabeth II and Lacey may have been cursed. By the dead. …If there’s an Illuminati Jack Kennedy may have become…unreasonably enraged by jealousy…because of their lovely friendship. …Elizabeth truly understands Lacey, as real friends do. And she was…a beacon of hope of the light of God for Lacey in her last years. Elizabeth is a great woman. …And so, if there’s an Illusion and Jack was able…he found a way to curse them both from the grave. Lacey’s valiant warrior spirit is why I’m able to tell you this today…if it’s true. She’s eternally at the Lord’s service, in deep humility. So is Queen Elizabeth II. They’re both warriors. Dignified. Ladylike.

Written In Stone by Ólafur Arnalds & Alice Sara Ott plays.

Lacey will be fighting fiercely for God after she dies…if He can use her. Fight. Fight. …Of course God has already won…but as humans we have to demand that be manifested.

My life wasn’t a tragedy, like my family suspected. It was a catastrophe. Why? …Because I knew so much.

Shannen Doherty died. And if there’s an Illuminati she heard Lacey preach the Gospel to her often. …And they were alike in some ways. As people. And…Shannen in angry. Actually she’s furious. …So is the father and husband from Pennsylvania who was shot protecting his wife and daughter. Some people have compared him to me. The man I was supposed to be. The sort of man I was supposed to be took the bullet. …And I saw it. God enabled me to be there when it happened, And be with my family at the same time, because I’m dead.

…Lacey’s right. That shooting was also catastrophic. For the US. At least as the country we’ve known for decades. …There’s a contingency of people who are not going to be lured into the…muck of the current argument as it stands, but who have guns. And those people aren’t afraid to use them if necessary. I was actually very good with a riffle. And that’s not something you’ll likely ever read anywhere. And they mostly all are too. …A lot of people…are suspicious.

Joe Kennedy Junior may have loved Lacey. And that’s where things get damn ugly. Because she’s…entirely…lost.

Oil by Jonny Greenwood plays.

Lost? Yes. …Because he was dishonest with her. He gave her the impression that…it meant nothing for her to be talking with his ghost. He gave her the impression that he was talking to her spirit because “at the end of the day” he was just an ordinary person. …And she was just extremely ordinary. …They were ordinary together. And…she took that to heart. …So…when she experienced anything…grand since then she’s assumed it’s…in this sort of…ether of ordinary.

Metamorphosis: Five by Philip Glass plays.

And actually Lacey made logical assumptions about the nature of her eternal bond with Joe because of the way he treated it. And those assumptions were horribly inaccurate. For a moment they were soulmates…and God was always going to have to correct that. Because that wasn’t necessarily His design. But things had been so tampered with in the fallen world that it temporarily became that, in a way. And it was Hellish for me to watch. …But I did drugs and was going to let teenagers die alongside me. I led a terrible life. It was far removed from what I was designed for. It was, as I wrote, a catastrophe.

Cantus in Memory of Benjamin Britten by Arvo Pärt plays.

Why did Joe tell Lacey they were nobodies? That’s an interesting question. …But regardless, it’s dire now. It’s a dire situation. And the world is still in shock and denial. …She’s not necessarily ordinary. …And he wasn’t entirely either. …But he was trying to create romantic love between them…and he knew how much she was in awe of him… And he had a choice. He could be honest with her…and tell her the truth…or tell her a half truth. And he chose the half truth. And she’s not capable of getting her own head out of that mindset.

What is it? …Lacey is and was extremely beautiful. …And instead of telling her that in an honest way he told her that she was beautiful to him. …That he would have fallen in love with her. …He made it about him. So…through all of her 20’s he told her…not that she was being bullied because women were jealous but that…she should be more hopeful…because mysteriously…for some reason…he would have found her extremely attractive. He told her spirit that. Repeatedly. So…she realized that there was something special about her…but…she never knew what it was really. …And so…she’s never realized how heartless people have been to her fully. Until recently. How little they cared. And how…heartless and dishonest they’ve been. How they CHEATED.

And they did. They LIED.

How? They’d tell her she was beautiful. Extremely beautiful. A rare beauty. …But…it was said in a way that almost made it seem…meaningless. Cheap. …Or she never grasped what they were really saying.

And to her…it’s all…nothing now. Absolutely no big deal. Dull. Stupid. Loveless. Joe killed her spirit…because they were never meant to be together. He had no bloody right to talk to my wife, instead of me. But he did.

Departure (Reflection) by Max Richter plays.

I was an eccentric fool, maybe. So eccentric and unusual most people can’t easily grasp me or my mindset. But Lacey does. And I need her and needed her. And she’s- She longs to be loved by me. Desperately. You don’t mess with that! It’s a GOD DAMN LIE…that I was gay. And I obviously believed it myself too. But…it was a lie. And that’s OBVIOUS. But…not everyone is Red Fay or Lacey Banks. Not everyone sees the lie. …I was straight. I’m sorry.

…But anyway…Lacey doesn’t understand. She doesn’t know. …And I’ve tried telling people that. But I don’t think they understand. Or they don’t like it. …Being Tom Banks’s daughter…possibly conceived in his late 80’s…seems…ordinary to her. Discovering the real Illuminati accidentally…seems ordinary to her. FOR REAL. Being friends with Queen Elizabeth II seems ordinary…even if she honors the Queen and her non-ordinaryness, so to speak. …But I could be Emperor Constantine and she’d find that painfully ordinary. Just…made absolutely dull with the ordinary. …Because people have so abandoned her and lied to her…that she cognitively can’t grasp it anymore at all. She’s been so unloved it seems…totally unimpressive.

Open Spaces by Jonny Greenwood plays.

Why? Because she loves God. …And so she compares everything to Him. And compared to Jesus…being Scota…is NOTHING. Extraordinarily unimpressive and unimportant. Really made important only through Him. That’s just true. …And because she’s been so lied to and unloved and alone…the context of everything else…and everyone else’s experience is lost to her. People have been so narcissistic…that they have given her the impression that they’re not insecure at all…and truly feel vastly superior to her.

Summa by Arvo Part plays. Entirely. For strings.

She’s not fooled into thinking they’re really as pretty as her. Or as well off. …She’s very rational. …But they lie so well. And they’re possibly mentally-unwell. And so she believes they have some secret…bliss. …I genuinely was straight. …I’m really that rare. I’m really that complicated of a person. I was really that…free-thinking and…outrageously…different. …I just fit in well enough to seem…relatively relatable, I guess. Somehow. …But I was really a very eccentric, artistic, unusually intelligent heterosexual…with what you’d call clinical depression that I hid from most people. …I could be very jolly about…food. I practiced thankfulness. To my detriment. …And I don’t think you understand how much I hid my suicidal tendencies with my ability to appreciate anything and everything of value in life. …But there’s no way I could have been that happy at Jack’s wedding if I wasn’t able to not care in some profound way, like being attracted to women and never actually being attracted to him. …If you can’t imagine it…I’ll have to hope God can help you understand. Lacey can’t keep reexamining it and explaining it over and over again for the rest of her life. It’s totally sick and unfair to her.

Look…her family really does have a staggering amount of oil. Crude. Light crude. …And she really might have married Michael Rockefeller. For real. …And…things like that…astound her. Because she’s trying to be humble. And listen to other people. …But ironically if left to her own devices she’s…not at all…even aware of what any of that means. Really.

She understands…global politics. Science to some degree. …Economics fascinates her. But…you’ve all lied too…damn…well.

See…she knew I was straight the second she saw me. Or seemed straight. And she’s smart enough to know she shouldn’t disregard that information she provided herself. …But there’s possibly really no way for her to know you’re suffering, if you are. She can sense distress. And…she’s very compassionate. So…if you didn’t lie to her she would pick up on your…unhappiness or insecurity in a loving way. But…you’ve lied so damn much. And you’ve often even yelled at her and embarrassed her for being worried about you. Because of pride? Or…narcissism? Whatever it is…she has no clue.

Yes. I’m an entity writing this through Lacey. …I’m actually Lem Billings. But how would you know that? And to many Christians it will seem like heresy or it will seem sacrilegious that I’m writing this, and therefore impossible to be of God. Be careful.

“What does she think we’re doing? Behind her back?” asks a reader from Instagram.

“We tried to Satanically or through Black Magic cut off any and all human compassion for Lacey. Years ago. …But we’re not Old Money enough in the Illuminati for it to have worked entirely. And the dead have been very active. As has God possibly. As has Tsar Putin…Iran…and North Korea. Sometimes even China. …But…we didn’t and don’t control them as well.” admits the They in the Illuminati.

“What does Lacey assume?” says Lem. He laughs. “She assumes that…”

Summa by Arvo Part plays. Entirely.

“You have a swimming pool. And you lay there on a cloudy, June day…in a huge floatie…isn’t that what they’re called? A floaty? And…you sip lemonade and stare up into the heavens and listen to the birds. And think. …Stuff like that.” says Lacey.

“What was my life like? In Texas? When you were trying to be my friend.” says Casi, somberly.

“You watched Unsolved Mysteries. …In your pajamas. While eating McDonald’s. In your living-room. …And spent copious amounts of money and time spraying perfume. And smelling it. …And driving. And online. And high on pain pills. And…talking with people. And…you…could have worked. But you chose not to. Because you were and are…entitled and angry. Or something. I don’t really know.” says Lacey.

“That’s not you!?” scoffs a hater.

“How IN HELL…did and do you ever make that mistake!?” yells Lem. “OF COURSE NOT!!!”

“No. That’s a sick question even.” says Lacey.

“What do you do?” she asks. “I can’t imagine it.”

“BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT TO FEEL UGLY AND INFERIOR TO HER!!” yells Lem.

“Dammit.” says a man in St. Paul, feeling guilty.

“My life wasn’t that…posh.” says Casi.

“How often do you eat McDonald’s?” asks the hater of Lacey.

She thinks. Looks confused. “Every…two or three months. Maybe less.” says Lacey.

“So you cook!?” she says to Lacey.

“She’s an excellent cook. I can tell!” says Casi, freaking out.

“Yes. I cook.” says Lacey.

“I didn’t really know you.” says the hater.

“Yeah. And I assumed you were a different person than you are.” says Lacey.

“What do you do?” asks Casi.

“I can’t discuss it.” says Lacey. “It’s too upsetting. But…some days I write. More than I’d like. And…I cook, clean, tidy…plan.”

“Do you dust?” asks a reader.

“Yes!” says Lacey. “I love dusting. It’s such light yet instantly rewarding work.”

Casi nods. “It is.”

“She gardens.” says her neighbor.

“Yes! I may have included that in tidying.” says Lacey.

“Do you read?” asks a man.

“Not anymore. It’s too depressing.” says Lacey. “I’m too unloved to enjoy it anymore.” She thinks. “It just makes me angry.”

“You read the New York Times.” says Bill Gates to Lacey.

“Yes. And stuff like that. …But I can’t read. Really read. Not now.” says Lacey.

Another one of Lacey’s neighbors nods in understanding.

“You know…darling…if Lem wasn’t gay…he wasn’t gay.” says her neighbor to her.

“Then…what…the Hell…is going on?” asks Lacey, poetically.

“FUCK!!” yells a dead American journalist, in shock.

“We took ourselves way too seriously in my family.” says Joe Kennedy Junior.

“Ya think!?!” says Casi.

“What happens if Lem wasn’t in love with Jack at all Lacey!?” asks Joe Kennedy Junior of Lacey.

Lacey sighs. “And he was misquoted or misunderstood?”

“Yes.” says Joe.

“Or he was confused?” says Lacey.

“Yes.” says Joe.

She thinks. Takes a deep breath. “I have to think back to my childhood maybe.” she says.

“Lacey. What you don’t tell them is that you eat chocolate covered strawberries. And drink good iced tea out of $60 glasses while watching Wimbledon. …After vacuuming.” says Joe.

“Oh! Who cares? They think that’s stupid June Clever stuff anyway.“ she says.

She thinks.

“You’re very, very docile. And good tempered. And sweet. …And hardworking. …But you’re a real lady. And…sharper than a tack. And…dangerous…if pushed too far.” says her step-mother-in-law. “You’re not mean. You’re…like a sweet, wild creature. Dignified. But not for a zoo, so to speak.”

“What does she do in a zoo?” asks her father-in-law.

“She escapes.” says the woman. “And becomes a dangerous invasive, albeit beneficial and occasionally benevolent, species.”

“Dangerous how?” asks her father-in-law.

“She’s…one of a kind. And…irreplaceable. Like a potato. But as potentially deadly as a polar bear.” she says. “Or…a hungry snake? An alligator. But she’s fully human. It’s…hard to describe, I guess.”

“Like heroin. But…better. Because it’s what God created Lem for. For him to experience becoming one with.” says a reader.

“She’s better than any drug.” says Lem.

“So you just…do housework. And…then sip tea. In $300 tea and saucer sets. And analyze something. And…plan dinner.” says Casi.

“Yes.” says Lacey. “On a good week day. For a bit.”

“What’s embarrassing about you?” asks a hater of Lacey.

Lacey thinks. “I can’t buy more than one Launer at the moment. Nor can I completely remodel my kitchen at the moment. Nor remodel most things at the moment I want to remodel. …We wasted $60,000…thanks to Citristrip. Truly. It was terrifying.” says Lacey.

“You had to redo your wood?” asks a reader.

“Yes! They paid over $20,000 to redo the wood. In one room.” says Lem. “Thanks to Citristrip.”

“Was it Citristrip?” asks a reader.

Silence.

“Is there an Illuminati!?!” says Michael Rockefeller, getting annoyed.

“Yeah. $60,000 is a lot to lose. By accident.” says a man.

“It is.” says Lem.

“I’m still here. Watching.” says “Grandpa Pantell.“

“So you’d be redoing your kitchen?” asks Casi.

“Let’s not talk about it.” says Lem.

“What else is embarrassing?” asks her hater.

“We need to clean our yard.” says Lacey.

“They do. So do we.” says her neighbor.

“Yes! And I have a weed problem in my garden.” says Lacey.

Her hater nods.

“What else?” says Lacey. “Oh! My kids eat too many sweets. …We have mice. But I’m addressing that. …Our front porch is sagging due to age. …Etc.”

“Like you need new paint?” says a reader.

“Yes! Our roof is good. But there’s lead paint that needs a safe scrapping. And we’d have painted and worked on our deck but it’s rained too much.” says Lacey.

“What else?” asks a hater.

“I love perfume even there’s phthalates.” says Lacey.

“Why can’t you fix your deck?” asks the hater, suspiciously.

“Because it’s rained too much. Truly.” says Lacey. “It’s wood. It would need to dry.”

“Oh. Before you sealed it?” she says, suddenly realizing Lacey isn’t lying. She looks awkward.

“Yes.” says Lacey.

“Did you have to save your tree yesterday?” asks her neighbor.

“Yes!” says Lacey. “It fell over.”

“It looks fine now.” he says.

“It’s being held up by metal and rocks.” says Lacey.

He nods.

“What did you all plant yesterday?” he asks.

“Basil and peppers.” says Lacey. “We tried to grow basil from seed but it was unsuccessful.”

He nods.

“Or peppers I mean!” says Lacey, correcting herself.

“Someone is trying to kill you.” says her doctor suddenly. “That’s the thought that keeps coming to me when I see you. But I ignore it.”

“Because it seems insane?” says Lem.

“Yup.” she says.

“Who channels all of us!?” asks a reader.

“God. Demons. Ghosts. …Possibly also psychics.” says Lem.

“What else is embarrassing about you?” asks her hater.

Lacey thinks. “My carpet upstairs stinks.” she says.

“In your upstairs hallway?” asks the hater.

“Yes. It’s old. But Mark doesn’t want to replace it yet.” says Lacey.

“Okay. Umm…so you’re tired and haven’t gardened enough. The carpet upstairs in your house that has a nice problem smells bad. And…your kids eat too many sweets. And…you need to do a few repairs. And…you foolishly assumed Citristrip was safer than it is…for you… What else!?! What’s…down-to-earth about you?” she says.

“That’s what I could think of.” says Lacey.

“Your messy yard!?” she says.

“Yes.” says Lem, annoyed.

“What financial problems do you have?” she says.

“They’re fine.” says Lem. “It’s hard-work. But they’re fine.”

“So you have money. Okay. Umm…you’re really the person you are on Instagram.” she says.

“In a way.” says Lem.

Their neighbor nods.

“You’re stuffy.” she says.

“Maybe.” says Lacey.

“She’s not as fake as you want her to be.” says a woman. “She’s…not trying to reject people. So much as fight for her life.”

“You’re not like us.” says her hater.

“Okay.” says Lacey, irritated.

“Shelly Long’s character was possibly supposed to be a cartoon version of Lacey that insulted Lacey’s natural beauty. I’m sorry. But…it doesn’t work.” says a dead Shriver.

“Get over it Shelly!” says Shannen Doherty. “Lots of women were prettier than you. Including me.”

“Yeah. Okay.” says Shelly Long.

“So…why McDonald’s?” asks Lacey’s hater.

“Because she showed photos of herself eating there.” says Lacey. “And captioned it by saying, ‘I’m lovin’ it.’” says Lacey.

“Yeah. Okay.

She was fat.” she says.

“Yes. But that’s not why I said that.” says Lacey.

“So there’s nothing narcissistic about you almost at all?!” she says.

“I hope not!” says Lacey. “I mean I hope that’s true. Good grief.”

“I don’t understand why you were friends with Casi.” says the hater.

“Why not? She collected perfume. Why shouldn’t I have been following her?” says Lacey.

“Because she’s rude.” says the hater.

“Lots of people are rude.” says Lacey.

“Yeah. Okay. …But she’s so far beneath you. I was too.” she says.

“And I only cared about that after you all made it matter.” says Lacey.

“So we’re the ones with a problem.” says a man in Scotland.

“Yeah.” says Lacey. “I guess?”

“It was just stupid jealousy.” says Casi.

“I see.” says Lacey.

“So you just saw me as another follower?” says Casi.

“Yes.” says Lacey. “Which isn’t an insult necessarily.”

“You know…you are boring.” says an Illuminati woman to Lacey.

“I am.” says Lem. “We are.”

“I’m not bored by him.” says Lacey.

Lem smiles. “She doesn’t bore me either.”

“So the only way to make you both exciting is to defile you?” asks a reader.

“Possibly. Even if there’s reincarnation.” he says.

“Look. Lots of famous people might be boring. Some people are engaging and some are not. …Lacey and Lem are kind. And good listeners. But Michael Rockefeller was engaging. Louis was fun to watch. …Scott Fitzgerald became fascinating. …Harold was stunning and mesmerizing to watch. …But Lacey and Lem prefer quiet. Not because they’re gay. …And yes. It’s a huge mistake to have so malignantly bothered them.” says something.

“So you need to mow. Trim the edges. Clear out weeds. Pick up sticks. …Wow!! And…your city has a mice issue.” says her hater.

“Yes. Saint Paul has had one for a few years.” says a reader.

“Okay. Umm…I’m sorry you can’t buy more handbags!” she says.

“I don’t care. I’m feeling like I have too many, to be honest. …I buy them to fit in.” says Lacey. “Or be respectful.”

“What are your essentials?” says Casi.

“My silver teapot. My tea cups. My dinnerware and silverware. Glasses, etc. kitchen supplies. …Some of my jewelry. My Launer and Noe. …My makeup and skincare. Ahh…good food. A safe house. …Clean water. A washer and dryer. Internet. …My Audi in good condition. A good driver. …A good mirror. Clean towels. Clean, good beds. Umm…a few good paintings, or prints. …A television. …Clean air. …An oven. A good, safe oven. Stuff like that.” says Lacey.

“This is stupid. Lacey. They’re just jealous.” says Casi.

“But what about Lem!?!” says Lacey.

“He’s probably there with you. And he’s possibly a straight dude.” says Casi.

“But it’s the end of the world.” says Lacey. “Aren’t I responsible?”

“Who told you that!?!” yells Casi.

“I don’t know.” says Lacey.

Casi fumes. Thinks. “Lacey I don’t think Lem is gay. I don’t think he ever was.”

“But they swore he was.” says Lacey.

“They might have been lying.” says Casi.

“LYING!?” says Lacey, in shock.

“Lacey!! People LIE!!” says Casi.

“No!” says Lacey.

“No. Sweetie they do. …They lie to you.” says Casi.

“Not all of the time.” says Lacey.

“They do.” says Casi.

“Then this is bad.” says Lacey.

“What is!?” says Casi.

“I’m GOING TO DIE!” yells Lacey, in terror.

“We all are.” says Casi.

“No! They’re going to kill me!!!” yells Lacey.

“WHO!?” says Casi.

“The- Native Americans? …Or no. Umm…the communists!?… I don’t know. But I feel my life being threatened.” says Lacey.

“Or maybe you’re feeling your father’s trauma?” asks Casi.

“They’re going to kill us!” says Lacey.

“Who!?!” says Casi.

Lacey thinks. Tries to figure it out. “The communists?”

“Why?” asks Casi.

Lacey thinks. “I keep destroying them?”

“That’s your dad!” says Casi.

“But it feels like me.” says Lacey.

“It’s not. Almost guarantee it.” says Casi.

“But I’m involved.” says Lacey. “I can feel it.”

“Not that way! …We don’t necessarily even know you exist.” says a dead Mexican drug lord. “If you’re his daughter. Or didn’t. I’m dead. And he’s dead too!”

“But I can feel like I’m involved.” says Lacey.

“Yeah. That’s how it feels. And you are. But not like that. Not with us. …It’s complicated.” he says.

“What’s GOING ON!??” yells Lacey.

He nods. “You’re life was taken and thrown up into the air. And it’s not turned out well. …It’s a mess.” he says.

“And our jealousy is too much.” says a hater.

“It’s too damn confusing. She’s sorting through tons of baffling hate mail. In her spirit. Daily. And has been her whole life. …And it’s too confusing.

Tell me. Why do you lie so damn much?” he says.

“To feel better about ourselves.” says her hater.

“Well…I didn’t know you were lying.” says Lacey.

“So I have a PhD. Stuff like that.” says the hater.

“Exactly.” says Lacey.

“I’m not that sophisticated.” she says.

“I see.” says Lacey.

“What do you want from her?” asks Lem.

“An apology.” says her hater.

“For believing you.” says Lem,

“What seemed fake?” asks her hater.

“Not much.” says Lacey.

Casi nods. “No. She assumed we were all mostly honest.”

“You seemed authentic enough.” says Lacey.

“Average upper middle class, middle class families.” says a hater.

“Yes!” says Lacey.

“And you didn’t have to have it absolutely correct so you could be a little wrong.” says Casi. “So…good enough.”

“Maybe.” says Lacey.

“No. Lots of people lie.” says Casi.

“It’s too sad.” says a hater.

“Okay.

Well that’s sad.” says Lacey, with sincere empathy.

“Did you ever lie?” asks a hater.

“Possibly about how clean my house is.” says Lacey. “Not really much else.”

“So you’re prettier in person?” says hater.

“Yes! Much!” says Lem.

“We lie about that.” says the hater. “The other way.”

“Oh! I see.” says Lacey.

“You’re not mad?” asks a hater.

“Oh a bit.” says Lacey.

“What’s in your collection right now?” asks a hater.

“Everything on Instagram.” says Lacey.

He nods.

“Anyway.” says Lem. “Someday you can apologize for all being psychotically obsessed with being better than her. …It’s very stupid. And maybe you can also apologize for making big assumptions about me. But…that’s not as insane. As insane. You’ve still ignored common sense about me and my feelings and life for decades. …You bought Jack Kennedy’s lies. Sold yourselves. Sold your communities and families. To buy his lies. And now you’re underwater. …But that’s life! Right? Or is it? Is it a bigger deal than that.

…Say…why are you all so damn obsessed with being better than Lacey…when the real problem is the toxic nature of the current American culture? Why does it feel like an emergency to defeat her? But not Climate Change?” says Lem.

They think.

“Who’s brainwashed you all into thinking that!?” says Lem.

(July 14th, 2024 – Afternoon)

Last night a storm blew through my neighborhood. And it rained. It’s been raining every other day for months now. …It’s part of a trend emerging in the area. Minnesota is getting more wet.

What’s happening is truly terrifying.

And Shannen Doherty died. At 50. 50. …Let’s be real…she wasn’t that young. Lots of people over 40 die of cancer. …But I vividly recall her being a teenager…and feeling like she was so young…and so…popular. …I didn’t necessarily follow her lead at all…but I recall feeling as though I should. She was supposed to be my role model. And now she’s dead. In reality of…what might be slightly natural causes. 50 is beyond middle-age. 50 is old. I’m not some rich, spoiled Boomer who’s determined to make it something it’s not. …50 is old. I’m 40. I’m ten years away from being genuinely old. Not as old as one can be. But old. The start of being truly old.

Things don’t look good.

It’s the possible end of America. Mark my words. We’re close to total collapse. Why? Because of the assassination attempt on Donald Trump. …He’s not a “progressive.” He’s a renegade but he’s not…liberal. Politicians like him aren’t supposed to be targeted in this way. …George Wallace was. But as much as the US media loves to demonize Donald Trump as a crazy ultra conservative according to them…he’s very popular. He’s very, very popular. …George Wallace had a following but if I’m not mistaken it wasn’t like Donald Trump’s. Donald Trump isn’t an outlier. He’s thee leader of his generation in our current era. Let’s be real. Psychologically that was a…very…big…deal. What happened yesterday was huge.

What does that mean? …It’s what I’ve been saying for years now. …There are fault lines in the US. And Pennsylvania is right on an old fault line. It’s no coincidence he was shot there. I mean…Gettysburg.

Jack Kennedy’s assassination was in Texas. Makes sense. The old guard was calling him and his family and what he represented out by killing him. Bobby Kennedy Junior was assassinated in California because, again, his candidacy was somewhat like his brother’s but also he was…a wing of the Democratic Party people found issue with. If there’s a conspiracy, of course. Or perhaps…even if there was not. Psychology is fascinating.

But…yesterday was bad. Why? Because it’s the beginning of a fascist coup attempt…or…it’s a terrible, idiotic attempt to keep power on behalf of the Mainstream Liberal Regime, or…it’s an anarchist coup…or…a Russian maneuver…or…it’s the absolute decay of the United States of America.

Later.

This…is so sad.

So many people love her. She’s a well-respected Boston College professor. An author of many scholarly and well-respected US History books. …But I’m my opinion she’s a fool…a well-intentioned ignoramus…or she’s evil and working for very evil people. …I respect her call to…vote, and…work to be American. Or rather whatever part of it is sincere on her part…but…she’s missing so damn much.

“Take back your power!” she says. And then she calls on people to act…to recreate the American Revolution. …What THE HELL…is she inciting? Armed warfare!? …AGAINST WHOM!? …DONALD TRUMP!? And his supporters? How is that DEMOCRATIC!? *Huge eye-roll*

And then…she absurdly or…in sad ignorance claims over and over and over again that her view…IS THE MAJORITY. She…is brainwashed, brainwashing people…or she really has no clue. …I’m quite certain Donald Trump’s supporters are NOT a MINORITY. …What data is she using!? Or is she just imagining she already knows?

Does she imagine that mainstream Democrats are some…invisible vast majority? It’s…a huge number of people who are actually on his side. Or who side with at some of most popular policies. …I’ve been stunned and scared by the Democrat response of, “Oh! It’s only a small group of ‘mouth-breathing’ hicks who like Donald Trump!” that’s been repeated over and over again since 2016. …Are they en league with Donald Trump? Antagonizing people who support him to give him a reputation? Or are they just…disgusting?

Disgusting? Yes. I’m sorry. Hopefully they’re not. But to me…I can’t think of a better way to describe that kind of foul mindset. …Because it’s almost as if they’re…all…vain…self-promoting…social-climbing…materialistic…shallow…bimbos. …Fools. Immature fools. …Spoiled, power obsessed, narcissistic fools. …Because…they don’t seem to think there ever wrong. Ever. …Or ever evil. Or ever…anything but angelic superheroes. …Who are all fighting with their amazing heartfelt courage…for a…PROFOUND UTOPIA. A…GRAND…Heavenly….paradise. …And…it’s…what? Evil orange-white men like Donald Trump who are keeping them from establishing…something…AMAZING? Or what? …If we could all become androgynous zombies and eat each other without using language or any rule of law we’d probably have Heaven on Earth? …What is their end goal? …Because they seem like…fools. They seem like people who don’t know how to share power with people who…challenge them.

They aren’t at all challenged by purple haired, tongue pierced sluts. They’re challenged by the thought that Lem Billings wasn’t gay. They’re challenged by the thinking of the old aristocracy. Pat Robertson. Donald Trump supporters. Mark Zuckerberg. Vladimir Putin. …Anyone who makes them feel middle class…unattractive…or…deeply mistaken about something they use to feel superior to other people. They’re shallow materialists it seems. And they don’t seem to care…about anyone’s opinion but their own. …How…did they all become so entrenched…in one party!? …It’s astonishing to me. It’s terrifying.

And why the Democratic Party? Why!?! …The former party of the working class. The farmers. The DFL. Come on!!! …What…the HELL?!

Just The Feller by Thomas Newman plays.

…Well…let’s get back to Lem Billings. …It’s entirely possible I’m his “twin flame.” And I’m not JFK. I’ve never been him. …But…my father might be Tom Banks. …And I know his long-term mistress Thelma believed that the authorities turned on Tom Banks when he stopped donating money to the Democratic Party. …Up until then they possibly gave him an inordinate number of free-passes to do whatever he wanted that was illegal. He just had to pay his dues to the DNC. …It’s when he started supporting the GOP financially that he had to go to trial. …He’d been into illegal activity for decades at that point. …Anyway…why did he stop donating money to the DNC?

…Tom grew-up wealthy. …And I suspect he may have been Old Money. …I have to wonder if he felt alienated from the DNC in the late 1940’s or 50’s? …And if so, why?

I’m not sure…but I have hunch…it’s not…commonly discussed history, so to speak. …My hunch is that…he didn’t like…the DNC anymore. …He was a very intelligent man. …And I wonder…if he’d been…on the side of the Democrats for reasons of compassion. And a certain sort of intellectual depth. He was good friends with lots of Old Hollowed stars, remember? But…I wonder if he felt…alienated? …If he’s my father…I can relate.

If he’s my father…I suspect he was…categorized in his youth a…wild, crazy gangster. Right? A real savage. …And the DNC possibly embraced savages even in the early 20th Century. …But…growing-up wealthy, and white…with a personality like mine possibly…he maybe…became…too rich…and…

I am very often misunderstood. …Could he have felt…rejected by the Democrats? …How? …As an Old Money businessman.

See…you’ve heard about the rich old school Republicans who left the GOP for social reasons. But…that’s the common scholarly consensus. Isn’t it? What if…there were some Old Money…liberals…who were…wild in their youth who became more conservative? Right? Like before the Boomers did it. Right? I mean…it’s a thing. Why? …So…what if…Tom did that…but also…

I dunno. There’s something there. In the 1950’s. …And I keep thinking…he felt rejected. …By…people who just…didn’t…get it. …And actually…I wonder if Donald Trump is like that too? …And it seems like more than aging. It seems…like they discovered something wrong with the DNC. …What is it?

See…originally we weren’t supposed to have these two dominant political parties in the US. …So…maybe the DNC is the real problem. But if so…why? …They were the party of the old racist south. …And even though JFK is seen as a racial progressive…he possibly wasn’t really in many ways. Boston itself is historically very racist. …Minnesota can be too…but…I’d argue it’s hardly in the same way. We’re…suspicious. But it’s suspicious of everyone who didn’t grow-up here or who feels like an outsider. …I don’t think we’re actually one of the more racist areas of the US. …Anyway…I think…it’s hard for people like Tom and I to stay liberal as we age. And…yet…that’s evil…to so many people today. Not a majority…but rather…to the most popular people. To the…standard people. The people who tend to love the Dr. Cox Richardsons. And…I think…she’d be horribly intimidated by Tom Banks. I think…they’d cower. And…why? Because he’s…who they want to be. People copy me. People still COPY ME. …Why? Because they…like…what I represent.

But…I am that. So from my perspective…it’s not a competition. It’s…a world where my father was possibly drunk at 88…and my mother was…a failure. A beautiful failure. And my life feels…terrifying. And I’m constantly worried I’m going to die and go to Hell because I’m in love with a ghost.

Fratres (Version for Cello & Piano) by Arvo Part plays.

And…the one man who may love me more than anyone…was a brilliant, eccentric person…who misunderstood himself and believed he was a homosexual. And acted as one. …And I don’t bat an eye. Because to me it makes sense.

Of course. Of course.

…And…”Oh! You’re schizophrenic!!” you yell, seething? “There’s not a competition! I’m not jealous of you at all!!!” you shriek? …Ahh…but to me that’s gaslighting at its finest. …And…I am copied. …I am starred at. I am unusually beautiful. I…just am. …And…anyway…Tom may have been like that too. And…as “open-minded” as the DNC is…it’s…a party that was for many years for the benefit of poor…WHITE PEOPLES. And I’m not poor in any way. And I’m not necessarily racist. …Often…as popular as the Democratic Party’s ideology is…I am deeply antagonized. Especially as I age. Because…it’s political…and politicians lie. …And I don’t think they’re as nice as they pretend to be. Or as loving. …I think they may care about the poor…to a point. But I don’t think they give a shit about me and my family necessarily at all. …And I highly doubt Dr. Cox Richardson would admit that it stand to hear to even hear that. She’d probably act like it was a horrific personal attack on her and all that’s normal, sane decent most likely if I ever said that to her. Or she’d act like I was…a stupid woman. Something. …But the point is…people like her, from my experience, can never hear anything but why they want to hear. Not from adults. Not adults their age. They act like it’s WWII and they’re fighting the good fight if they do. …It’s so offensive. Because it’s not congruent with actual democracy.

No. My father was too stuffy, possibly. At heart. Too…fiscally conservative. Too…what?

“They tried to control me.” says Tom Banks. “The Democratic Party was very controlling. …Republicans understood I was really just a hardened businessman who had a deeply jaded view of the world. …Democrats wanted to make up my mind for me about everything, it seemed. And I resented it.”

“Okay. What about reproductive rights!?” says a woman on the left.

“You can still get safe abortions. They’re just not seen as a Federal sacrament anymore.” says Lacey.

Later.

“Do you hate Dr. Cox Richardson?” asks a woman.

“No! Absolutely not. …I find her sad. …She’s possibly genuinely patriotic. …But she’s…part of a group of people who hate people like me. …I have to walk on eggshells at my doctor thanks to people like her. …They control the popular narrative. And if you upset them it’s no different than the supposedly repressive narrative of the pre-revolutionary 1960’s. …They clutch their pearls too. …But with a sort of peasant-like, inner-city London accent. …Like they’ll smash you over the head with their umbrella and drag you into a basement and torture you. Just for kicks. Just to…amuse their egotistically offended selves. …You know in old England, in the 1800’s there were lots of poor people who were hardened and crass and very cruel. To rich people who were too trusting. …Rich children were often kidnapped? …The American trope about all of the poor being from Mayberry is bullshit. …And that’s the thing.

The DNC is the party of the New Money elite. The poor. The white bourgeois. …And…to a point it represents the racial minorities. To a point.

Republicans are expected to be old sports. Good chaps. Ladies and gentlemen. …And that’s supposedly repressive. …But I don’t experience it that way at all. To me…it’s just who I am. …I’d wear June Clever apparel everyday. …It’s sincerely who I am.

…And there it is.

Lem Billings wasn’t necessarily gay. Red Fay says so himself. …And actually…if I can talk to his ghost…he was seemingly straight. …And I think he’d of liked me in a dress and pearls everyday. Or at least at dinner. …And…I don’t mind that. …That’d be our somewhere. Right? …And if I’m sleeping with him…we’re hardly the sexually backwards, repressed, uptight fools the DNC narrative likes to suggest we are.” says Lacey.

“Yeah. It’s true!

If Lacey Banks…had married Lem Billings…and they’d chosen to live in Philadelphia…they’d have been…so traditional. And happy. And you’d have HATED them. …AND you’d NEVER…NEVER…have assumed he was gay. At all. …AT ALL. …Even if he had acted gay before he married her. …Actually…if he’d married her ever you’d have assumed he was bisexual or…somehow…just…different. …But…that’s not what happened. And as people from lower classes…trying to be accepted…the sort of conversation that would allow for you to consider if he was unusual and…somehow…eccentric…doesn’t happen.

See…posh people, and I was one of them, sat around and judged people. Openly. Back then.

‘Did you hear about Lem!? …You know…he was strange… When I first met him, he was…well… But he’s getting married to some darling young woman from Minnesota now. Just a doll! And I think she’s over the moon for him!’” says a woman from Pittsburgh. “It sounds so…mean. But people talked like that. In polite conversation. In the Old Money upper-class. …We didn’t just sit around and sip tea.”

“Lem…would you have lowered your voice…and quit talking gay entirely?” asks a woman today.

“I did. Regularly. …You can hear it. …It was an act. …Red Fay questioned my homosexuality for a reason. …It was an act.

And see…that’s irritating to have to explain that.” says Lem.

She closes her eyes and nods. “Yeah. Because to you and your Old Money family, including the Banks, homosexuality is a medical condition. Of some sort. …Not a choice. …So…it’s real. And…you either are or your not.

Lacey…does this…seem…like Hell?” she asks.

“How stupid the conversation is?” says Lacey.

“Yeah.” says Michelle Obama.

“Yes!!!

Why are we questioning whether or not homosexuals is a choice!?!? …A CHOICE!?!” says Lacey.

“But to them it is a choice. …Because they don’t understand. …They don’t understand the upper-class ideal. The…man and the woman. …I think maybe Lem was straight. …I’ve analyzed it. And starred hard at his photos. …He could have been straight. For real. …I think I can see it too. And…Michael was bisexual. Right? …I can see that too. …But…he’d of been considered straight. Like Jack! Because…for them…it was a choice.

And I think…it’s a bisexuality confusion. I think the issue of bisexuality is what made us think it was a choice to begin with. And possibly…POSSIBLY…there are many, many more people who were confused like Lem. Okay? Actually confused. …And for Lem…it’s a choice! …He was aroused by WOMEN. …But he chose to…live a gay life…because…he believed it was honorable. …He can’t have been the only person who gave credence to that. …So…confused straight people. Bisexuals. AND…gay people…who enjoyed their other sex spouses. …Maybe they married their closest friends. …Lesbians who married their male pals. Gays who married their favorite female friend. …And they felt…safe. Right? Financially safe. Emotionally safe. …And…they enjoyed parenting together. And…societal acceptance. So…they had reason to believe they were choosing too possibly.

Anyway…not everyone is as ironed out as you and Lem. …Do you really think it’s a class thing? Or an intelligence thing?” asks an Indian man.

“I think the upper class is less inclined to be confused.” says Lacey. “The Old Money anyway. Or was.”

He nods.

“Anyway…it’s likely a mental illness. Or it’s not. …That’s how I see it. And if it’s not…and it’s allowed in Heaven…then they’re just different. That’s all. …And perhaps they need to accept that themselves too.” says Lacey.

“So you feel like it’s obvious Lem was straight. And it’s somehow genetic. Or…a disease. …And we are…backwards?” says a living doctor.

“Yes.” says Lacey.

“Yeah. Because…it’s physically apparent somehow.” she says.

“Yes! It’s a…subculture. And they have a cultivated history of making their own mannerisms. …Like their own mannerisms that aren’t genetic. …But…I think they’re obviously not straight before they ever manifest their sexuality through their mannerisms.” says Lacey.

“Really!??” says Casi.

“YES! …Well…men anyway. But I can’t imagine women are for certain not as obvious too.” says Lacey.

“You’re so fucking threatening.” says Dr. Cox Richardson to Lacey. She laughs. “You know why?”

“Why?” asks Lacey.

“Because we can sense you own us. Or could. And it scares us.” she says. “Lem is OBVIOUSLY…OBVIOUSLY yours. …And…no…you’re not Jack Kennedy. …You’re frighteningly different than him.

…If Lem was bisexual…and he’s trying to tell you that but you can’t quite hear him…I think…Jack Kennedy was his false flame. …And you’re the real thing. …Your love for him is…moving. You truly love him. Jack Kennedy never gave him that. And…we all deserve that.

…And if he was straight…you bloody well know that…YOU BITCH.” says Dr. Cox Richardson to Lacey. “You are a bitch. You have to be. Right?

…Why…do you antagonize…the upper middle class?!?!?”

Lacey thinks. Rebelliously drinks her iced tea at 10:42. Because it’s so darn good.

“I’m mad.” says Lacey.

“Why?” asks Dr. Cox Richardson.

“Because I feel abandoned, I think.” says Lacey. “Totally thrown in a huge trash bin. In my soul.

And…I think I feel as though I’ve been forced to play dumb my whole life. And I’m sick of it.”

“So if you’re illegitimate you knew?” asks Donald Trump.

“Oh yes! I did. And still do. …If Tom is my dad…I don’t think anyone else is in my subconscious.” says Lacey.

“And you feel like we forced you to lie?” asks an Italian mafia man.

“The Boomers?” asks Lacey.

He nods yes and smiles.

“Yes. I’m sorry. …And it’s creepy. I feel like I was forced in that way to be everyone’s mother.” says Lacey.

“Because Tom was dad. And life sucked shit after you were taken from daddy. …And it was dumb to pretend otherwise…but we told you had to be happy.” he says.

“Yes.” says Lacey. “If Tom is my dad.”

“Eww!” says Dr. Moritz. “We must seem…pathetic.”

“Weak. You’d all seem…frighteningly weak.” says Lem.

“So…I’m not smarter than Dr. Moritz.” says Dr. Cox Richardson. “Just so you know. …And…I’m trying.

…You remind me of Shannen Doherty. The…British version, we’ll say. …Why…are you so…?

You know we’re poor. …Let’s move past abortion. We have different ways of dealing with it. And…if you believe abortion should be safe and accessible and legal…but not…a Federal sacrament…I think I can understand. …We don’t feel safe without Roe vs. Wade…but you seem to think we’re better off without it. …And when I say we…I do realize how…antagonistic that could sound. …Is that…triggering? …Let’s just say your mom did abandon you. Did I just trigger you?” asks Dr. Cox Richardson.

“Yes. …And…I can see why you don’t feel safe. But…I also know how men think. And they have a huge power insecurity with women. And…they do best when not antagonized. …In my experience…Roe Vs. Wade antagonized men. It didn’t make them mind. They didn’t…respect us more because of it. Not really. …Yes, it’s extremely important to protect the health of mothers. …But…making it a sacrament was dangerous. And evil. In my opinion.” says Lacey.

“So you feel states should protect the lives of mothers. …Discretely. But…making it…a front-and-center issue is…what? Too divisive?” she says.

“Yes. And…for what reason?” says Lacey. “I’m not prepared to get into it. But really…it was used to destroy us. Fascist Feminists are real. Evil Feminists are real. And they loved killing innocent unborn children.” says Lacey.

She laughs. She laughs more. “Yeah.

Well…okay. But why…the act? Why are you acting?

Do you hate…poor people? BE HONEST.” she says.

“No!! I love them.” says Lacey, sincerely.

“If you’re reincarnated…your view of Great Britain is very different than mine.” she says.

“It would be. Possibly.” says Lacey.

“Did you see your servants as people?” she says. “Be honest.”

“Workers. Suspect. …And I worried about them, a lot…secretly.” says Lacey. “Or I’m accessing someone else’s memory.”

“So I seem like one of them?” she asks.

“Yes. …At first, when I was little you didn’t. But as I’ve grown older…you do.” says Lacey.

“Who doesn’t seem like that?” she asks.

Lacey thinks. “The Royal Family. …Audrey Hepburn.” says Lacey. She laughs. “Man! …It’s creepy how few people seem like me. …Ahh…Donald Trump. …Possibly Tsar Putin. …Michelle Obama?” says Lacey.

“I did not expect Michelle Obama. …What does she seem like to you?” says the Dr..

Lacey thinks. “A woman who’s father…is from an aristocratic family. But who’s mother is…not. …And she’s very determined to prove his line.” says Lacey.

“Haha. That could be Michelle.” says a reader.

“So…what are we lying about?” asks Dr. Cox Richardson of Lacey.

Lacey thinks. “That’s the thing. …It’s not quite lying. …I’m so much more confused than that.” says Lacey.

“Yeah.

What are your…hunches?” says Donald Trump.

“I’m just so damn different than you.” says Lacey. “SO different. …I can’t figure out Americans. If there’s reincarnation I can’t figure you out.”

“We seem what?” she says.

“You seem…so…fresh. …So…personal.” says Lacey.

Donald Trump nods in understanding.

“Well…we decided in the 1960’s that reproductive rights were a thing.” says Dr. Cox Richardson.

“But why!??” says Lacey.

“Why is that weird!??” asks a British psychiatrist of Lacey.

“Because it’s so damn complicated. …I can see making abortion a medically important issue. But making it…dinner table conversation for decades…is WEIRD. And GROSS.” says Lacey.

“We needed sexual liberation.” says Dr. Cox Richardson.

“What was happening before!??” says Lacey.

The British psychologist laughs. “You don’t know?!?” he says.

“NO! I don’t think she does.” says Dr. Cox Richardson.

“We were uptight.” says the British psychologist with a lower class accent.

“Uptight?” says Lacey.

They become awkward.

(Genuine adult content below)

Donald Trump rolls his eyes. “Yeah. They didn’t have sex a lot.”

Lacey thinks. “Because of birth control issues?” asks Lacey.

“Yeah!” says a liberal doctor, shrugging.

Lacey thinks. “Why did America make that a front-and-center issue!??” balks Lacey.

“I hear you.” says Donald Trump.

“We may have been being lead around by evil people.” says a Republican man.

Lacey thinks.

“We’re trying to be…free.” says Dr. Cox Richardson.

Lacey thinks. “Are you real women?”

“Yes!” she says.

“I don’t think…it’s…something I can comprehend. …I have a womb. And…it’s mine. Sure. But…I’ve never questioned that. …Feeling owned is not my experience. Ever. Not really. …I get reproductive protections. But…it’s not quite the Wild West. It’s…common decency. It’s common sense.” says Lacey. “And the lower classes don’t get that. Possibly. …To you it’s revolutionary. To me…it’s…bizarrely obvious and odd to worry about it. In that way. …And I think it should be legal but not…’an issue.’ Because…it is murder. When it’s not medically necessary.” says Lacey.

“Like…medically. Hmm. Yeah.” says a reader.

“It’s a medical issue. And a moral one. But all issues are moral ones. That’s obvious too.” says Lacey.

“Why are you mad at us!?” says the reader.

Lacey thinks. “Because you’re all often…heartless too. …I suppose I don’t deserve any human life!? According to you?” says Lacey. “After Lem sucked Jack’s cock…even under duress…I was confirmed as not like…existing? Fo shizzle?” says Lacey, mockingly.

Dr. Cox Richardson laughs. “Was Lincoln bisexual?”

“Oh I bet. And it’s 100 years later too. Very Illuminati manifesting it by accident.” says Lacey.

“You’re not right.” says Dr. Cox Richardson.

“About what!?” says Lacey.

“There’s no Illuminati.” she says.

“How do you know?” says Lacey.

“There would have to be evidence.” she says.

“There is.” says Lacey.

“Not really.” she says.

“Yes. There is.” says Lacey. “There’s evidence everywhere. But it’s a secret.”

“I’m not in the Illuminati. I’m talking to you supernaturally.” she says.

“Okay.” says Lacey.

“You’re not Jack Kennedy.” she says.

“Nope.” says Lacey.

“I’m not complimenting you.” she says.

“It’s a compliment anyway.” says Lacey.

“So…why do you love Lem?” she says.

“Why THE HELL…DO YOU CARE!?” yells Lem.

“We messed-up.” says Bobby Kennedy Senior.

“Because! You were- Okay. So…

You don’t suck shit?” says Dr. Cox Richardson to Lacey from somewhere in time.

“No. I don’t.” says Lacey.

“So…we decided collectively…in the late 1990’s that your husband…who I’m sure gives you orgasms…was gay.” says Dr. Cox Richardson to Lacey.

“He gives me orgasms with his hard cock. And he gets a hard cock from starring at my tits. …How’s that gay?” says Lacey.

“So it’s not.” says the DNC.

“How is that possible!?” says a gay Democrat.

“It’s TOTALLY POSSIBLE! …You all made shit up…and assumed way too damn much.” says Israel to the DNC.

“Yeah. It’s so simple.” says Lacey. “Seemingly.”

“You know it really is. Why don’t they just get it!?!” yells Hamas.

“Because it’s so unlikely a straight person would ever…EVER…choose to act GAY!” scoffs a middle class white over 50 gay man.

“Not really. That’s very naive.” says Lacey.

“Actually…it kinda is.” says a Gen. Z gay guy.

“Really!? It was so risky!” he says, aghast.

“You’re overstating that risk. …He clearly wasn’t that worried. …He was ridiculously gay. …And it seems fake. But it’s LOUD. Almost like a parody. …I think…he was deep…and more concerned with harming people than being bullied or dying.” says Lacey.

“So he gave Jack whores…but didn’t want to infect nice girls.” he says.

“Yes. Seemingly.” says Lacey.

“And didn’t sleep with whores because he was…a gentleman?” asks the gay man.

“Yeah!! …I kinda thought I chickened out. …But…I think…I was deep. …Deeper than I thought I was.

…Sex meant something to me. I could dissociate. And I did. But…I had romantic feelings for women not just sexual ones. And I couldn’t turn that off and just make myself fuck some random person. …Very few whores aroused me. …I did make-out with one once for a few minutes but it was…dull.

…No. I should have been married. But…I was…tragic. …And…Lacey wasn’t there.” says Lem.

“Why does she choose you?” asks the gay man.

Lem thinks. “Because she’s mine. Even if there not reincarnation.”

“But no one else did!?” he says.

Lem thinks. “No.”

“That’s sad.” he says.

“Yup. My family hates Jack Kennedy.” says Lem.

“For his life or what he’s done now!?” he says.

“Now.” says Lem. “They didn’t like him. Now they hate him.”

“Lem is the US imploding?” asks Chris Hayes.

Awkward silence.

Lacey clears her throat.

“Because of this!?” says Lem.

“Yes. I guess.” says Putin rolling his eyes. “Just go to sleep you two. It’s late!”

“Are you okay!?” says Lacey to Donald Trump.

“I’ll be okay! There wasn’t that much blood loss!” says Donald Trump to Lacey.

“Good! And you’re recovering? Otherwise?” says Lacey.

“Yes!!” says Donald Trump.

“Oh good!” says Lacey.

“No, I’ll be fine.” says Donald Trump.

“Good.” says the woman who died in Pittsburgh.

“Well. It is late.” says Lacey.

“Yes!” says Donald Trump.

“Lem. Did you kill Jack?” asks Bobby Kennedy Junior.

Michael Rockefeller laughs.

“I think he did!” says the woman who died in Pittsburgh.

“It’s late. He might have. Whatever. You don’t care anyway.” says Lacey.

“You don’t think I care!?” says Bobby.

Lacey thinks. “Honestly? Not necessarily.”

“Why?” says Bobby.

“Because it’s not enough about you?” says Lacey. “It’s too boring to you?” She thinks. “Or it’s not the story you like about yourself?”

“What if that’s true!? I’m totally fucked-up.” says Bobby.

“You’re a malignant clinical narcissist? But…it’s only temporary if you go to Heaven eventually. And you might be able to improve it some here?” says Lacey.

“Our lives suck!” says Bobby to Lacey.

“If there’s reincarnation…yes. They do. …But God has an explanation. And we don’t have more than 40 years left at most. Maybe around 60 for me at most. And it’ll be quick!” says Lacey.

“I’m sorry.” says Bobby.

“It’ll be over soon. Just try to repent to God as much as possible.” says Lacey.

“We’re putting up a fight.” says Bobby.

“You have to!” says Lacey.

“Lacey…if Tom’s your dad at all…there’s a serious crisis. And it’s not just going to go away. Go to bed. I hope Lem can explain it to you. But go to bed.” says a man.