Premise: In the Illuminati they desperately try to be pedophilic atheists.
Why desperately? Because some of them actually aren’t pedophiles. But devoid of a backbone they cower under each other’s bullying. And the most narcissistic and violent and cunning voices in the room are the pedophiles.
So…when they found out Lacey’s family had oil it scared them. It scared them because they get scared very easily these days. Because being a pedophile makes you weak and useless in reality and the smartest pedophiles know that. They’re also most often incapable of existing in such a way as to work their way out of their derangement coupled with too much money and power and (obviously self-defeating) narcissism.
They might be better off dead. Literally.
They’re mostly all posers nowadays.
“Swim Until You Can’t See Land” by Frightened Rabbit plays. Lacey’s seen them live in concert before the suicide. They were genuinely good. Literally. I don’t lie…often if ever.
“But wait!” you might say. “Wasn’t Mr. Blue the one who found Lacey Rockefeller and got angry she thought she was better than him?”
“Who is the real Mr. Blue?” asks a reader.
“A man who wore a bright blue suit on MSNBC in 2015.” says Lacey. “He’s about 6 ft. tall.”
“See…the public really is supposed to be able to trust the press.” says Michael. “They’re not supposed to be pseudo-psychic bullies in a secret society crumbling because of their own lack of wealth they hide in stupid ways.”
“The Queen saved their asses her whole damn life. Didn’t she?” asks a perfume hater.
“Yes. She helped them think.” says Lacey. “Epstein helped too, believe it or not. Actually a great many people who have died in the last five or six years were their lifeline to existence.” She thinks. “Most Boomers are idiots on a certain level, unfortunately. Including Epstein. And it’s mostly the Greatest Generation and the Silent Generation who saved them from complete narcissistic self-implosion.”
“The Millennials probably are more helpful than they’re allowed to be.” says a Millennial.
“Why don’t the adults just have sex with each other and save their organization?” asks a perfume hater.
“Possibly because they feel above it.” says Lacey. “Like, they got some idea into their heads that they had to look the other way because having normal heterosexual sex was inappropriate. And the pedophiles bullied them into submission.”
“That’s why if she wasn’t a sacrifice I couldn’t…” starts Mr. Blue. But he can’t finish the sentence.
The truth is…if Lacey Rockefeller wasn’t an intentional sacrifice…Mr. Blue just couldn’t comprehend that she wasn’t his metaphorical chew toy. And his wife has massive delusions that she’s Beth Gallagher and Lacey is Alex Forrest. Which is funny considering he had regular affairs with actual co-workers of every gender and his wife either looked the other way or didn’t want to believe it. …Lacey’s never met him in person. He’s just stalked her and so have his mistresses, sadistically since 2015. …He just inculcated her into the real Illuminati against her will to get back at her for flirting with him.
“Why is it so offensive that she flirted with you?” asks Michael of Mr. Blue. “I mean you called her face a dog face.”
“I don’t have to answer her imaginary Michael? Do I?” Mr. Blue asks his handlers. He scoffs. His wife who believes her ugly chin, giant ears, tiny mouth, snowman cheeks broad forehead. And hideous nose are objectively hot as heck…scoffs. She’s thoroughly convinced she’s a true old-money, posh, elegant heroine who was targeted by Lacey. She sees herself as the puritanical, English aristocrat. The true old-money lady. She’s a (unobservant) Jew. New money. And not very (genuinely) bright. She talks fast. She flashes her side breasts because she was enabled to by her bourgeois family and her vain stupidity. …She’s pushy. She’s obnoxious.
“Her neck is ugly too. And she has man hands.” says Lem. “She’s very mannish although she’s actually a cis woman.”
“Is that why Mr. Blue liked her? Because she’s a very manly woman? …So it’s like…she has all the societal clout of a cis woman but…she’s vain and doesn’t realize she looks like a man?” asks Lacey.
“That’s extremely likely.” says Michael.
The Nazis crack-up laughing.
…The Nazis crack-up laughing.
“Let’s be nice. She’s an unobservant Jew.” says Lacey.
“They aren’t even Jews.” a dead Neo-Nazi says about Mrs. Blue’s family.
“This is an explosion blog!” yells a brain controlled member of the public being directed to find a way to attack Lacey.
Because if Lacey isn’t an intentional sacrifice she’s annoying to the Illuminati outside of those aligned with the dead Queen because she’s not a gullible, dim bourgeois female idiot. The they in the Illuminati refuse to understand that she’s not in love with Mr. Blue. Mrs. Blue can’t stand that he found Lacey attractive?
“See…she’s not lying, Kate. She’s not.” says Michael calmly to Kate. “You’re an ugly, shrewish, frigid whore.”
“You’re just saying that because you’re hurt I wasn’t in love with Lacey in any real way outside of my sadistic narcissistic obsession.” says Mr. Blue to Michael.
“No. I don’t so.” says Michael to Mr. Blue, condescendingly.
“So…why don’t…you two care?!” Mr. Douglas asks Lacey and Michael. He covers his mouth, laughing.
“We do care about monogamy.” says Lacey to Mr. Douglas. “It’s just that we genuinely are looking for love.”
“Yeah.” says Lem, slowly. He’s getting confused similarly to Lacey.
“See…it’s not that we don’t care about monogamy or fidelity or marriage it’s that we’re above your bourgeois, arbitrary nonsense.” says Lacey to Mr. Douglas.
“So…what? I wasn’t supposed to be hurt?” asks Mrs. Blue.
“No, it’s that we’re a bit similar to the actual, original hippies.” says Lacey to Mrs. Blue.
“Kate, why don’t you get it? She didn’t want to hurt you.” says Lem.
Kate Spade giggles.
“The thing is…Harold Loeb vouches for Judaism.” Lacey says to the Nazis.
“Well…I’m sorry I had a brief, foolish fling I took to heart and got devastated by. On my birthday in 2016 I wept because I realized how little Mr. Blue cared about me at all. On my birthday. Very drunk. And then I picked myself up and slowly got over him. And by 2017 I was almost entirely over him. And now I’d like to brutally torture you both for ever talking to me. Not out of jealousy but because I can’t stand that you were both born.” says Lacey to Mr. and Mrs. Blue.
“You genuinely find them that annoying?” asks Mr. Douglas flippantly and perverse presumptuously of Lacey. He’s going to stand-up for Mr. and Mrs. Blue on some grounds of a self-perceived moral authority.
“Why don’t you find me annoying?” asks Donald Trump of Lacey.
“Because you have actual authority.” says Lacey.
“So when I speak to you with authority it doesn’t bother you because I’m not a bully to your face at least and…I actually have authentic, non-delusional, non-narcissistically perceived authority.” says Donald Trump.
“True.” says Lacey.
“Why do you let her speak to you that way?” asks a bourgeois reporter of Donald Trump.
“You think she’s disrespectful?!” he blasts the woman with saying.
Lacey sighs, exasperated.
“Why does it bother you that I can’t let go of the daily fantasy I live in that I’m the victim of Lacey and that she’s the Bunny Boiler?!” scoffs Mrs. Blue under the influence of Illuminati witches.
“Because it’s so perversely delusional. You are both sexual predators. You’re wretched people. And I’m stalked by both of you.” says Lacey.
“We don’t stalk you.” says Mr. Blue. He gets huffy.
“Umm…no…you both are homicidal, obsessive, psychopathic terrorists in my life. I never pay attention to you until you try to contact me through the Illuminati or contact or hurt my kids.” says Lacey. “I don’t talk to or about your kids. I’ve prayed for them. I’ve never bothered or approached either of you since about…2016.” She thinks. “Actually, you both scare me.”
“How often do they try to contact you?” asks a hater.
“Weekly. Sometimes daily.” says Lacey. “Or they get a Kid Who Cares to do it for them.” She thinks. “The Queen protected me from them, but she’s dead now.”
“I bet Donald Trump tries to protect you? And possibly Putin, the Chinese…North Korea…and possibly a few other groups.” says a hater to Lacey.
“Aren’t you scared?!” haters in the Illuminati says to Lacey daily. “They’ll think you’re crazy!!!”
Lacey is annoyed. Sooo annoyed.
She does get scared to be honest…but…as a Christian she’s accountable to God. God is her fortress.
“I’m not an idiot!!!” Mr. Blue yells at Mrs. Blue.
“So…let me get this right…you found her attractive…you couldn’t stand her upper-class manners and attitude and then what…you decided to react narcissistically at every turn afterward?” a witch asks Mr. Blue.
“She fell in love with me.” he says in an exhausted, potentially imposed-upon voice.
“Did she though? Or did you just fool her into thinking she was in love with you long enough to hurt her?” asks the witch of Mr. Blue.
“You ask her?” Mr. Blue says, stumbling. He thinks, “See part of the problem is that I keep telling everyone in the Illuminati that she’s a pedophile and they’ve believed me to feel superior, but in reality I’m a pedophile and so are they, mostly. Like, we’re demon infested, degenerate perverts.”
“Could you be bringing about the end of the world?” asks the witch of Mr. Blue.
“I doubt it.” he says. He shrugs.
“So she’s not a pedophile at all?” asks the witch.
“No.” he says, casually. Sincerely? She isn’t one either way.
“So…she’s a victim of molestation who is recovered and…you chose that as a device to attack her…sadistically attack her with?” she laughs at him. “And you’re a real, evil elite pedophile, sex ring, monster we hear about on Tik Tok?” she giggles.
He looks scares. Stares at her.
“Why not just say yes?” asks the witch of Mr. Blue.
“I don’t have to without a lawyer present.” he says, stupidly. “See…she just has the impression I’m a pedophile because I work within a community that condones pedophilia to some degree, at least.”
“That’s not true. I bet you molest your own kids in some very covert way. A lot of you all do. And you are all dumb enough to think that that’s fine and not pedophilic. Because it makes you all scared to consider the reality of it.” says the witch.
“Does your wife protect your kids from you or not?” Lacey asks Mr. Blue about Mrs. Blue.
“No.” says Taylor Swift. “No, she doesn’t protect her kids from her husband.” She’s referring to how Mrs. Blue doesn’t protect her kids from Mr. Blue.
“I guessed as much.” says Lacey. Lacey is disgusted by them.
Mr. Blue plots to kill Lacey. He troubleshoots (yet again) how to kill her with his handlers.
“You’ve never agreed to or slept with any of these people? Or have you Lacey?” asks a witch of Lacey.
“No. That’s not true. She’s been running the country for years. Secretly. As much as they let her. …It’s more like she cleans up their messes… Putin might have killed the world, literally if she was truly game. …But…no…she never makes Faustian deals. Ever.” says Michael.
A witch in England cracks-up laughing. She’s likely laughing because Michael is right…but Michael is…umm…dead.
“Oh, no…the kind among you have helped me talk to ghosts. Seemingly.” says Lacey happily.
“She can’t be pretty enough or smart enough to talk to ghosts!!!” a perfume hater violently yells about Lacey.
“That’s…hopefully not a real opinion. You’re butt ugly. I can see you in my head.” Lacey says.
“Am I?” she threatens Lacey by asking.
“Yes. Are you brain dead? I’m gorgeous but I’m better looking in person. You’re ugly. Ugly. Like…genuinely ugly.” says Lacey.
“Am I?” asks the woman stubbornly.
“Are you brain dead? Serious question.” says Lacey.
Joe Kennedy Jr. freaks out realizing he’s genuinely been cursing Lacey in Purgatory by sleeping around considering he stole her soul.
“I’m ugly. Not brain dead.” says the perfume hater. Her friends try to get off her ego by laughing at Lacey for made-up reasons.
“She’s over me?!?!?!?! FOREVER?!?!?” Joe Kennedy Jr. screams in terror.
“I was in love with the version of Mr. Blue he put in my head via his role in the Illuminati in the public eye.” says Lacey. “I can’t stand who he really is. I loathe the actual person.”
“Do you promise you loathe us?” Mrs. Blue says about Mr. Blue and herself.
“I don’t think I can’t go so far as to say I completely loathe you and Mr. Blue 100%. But it’s at at least an 80%. Objectively. I find you two to be repulsive people. But I imagine God still wants you two saved, so to speak.” says Lacey. “He wishes for no humans to go to Hell. Hopefully you aren’t going to literal eternal Hell.”
“So you don’t think you were ever in love with me?” Mr. Blue asks Lacey.
“I was in love with a tiny part of your soul. But that’s all. And I respect parts of your wife’s soul. But no, if I’d known who you really are I wouldn’t have found you attractive at all, so to speak.” says Lacey. “I can’t imagine that hurting you in any real seek way to read that though. Right?! Do you have real feelings like other humans?” She thinks. “Or a brain that functions well enough beyond your lies to process the concept of human emotion?”
Mr. Blue decides to ignore Lacey.
“You don’t seem to understand. She’s never necessarily wanted to have any sexual or romantic interaction with you almost at all. And your obsession with making it otherwise has brainwashed a lot of other people.” says Jeffrey Epstein to Mr. Blue. “She being Lacey.”
“She’s not entirely over me. But she’s moving on.” Joe Jr. says objectively about Lacey’s romantic and sexual feelings for him.
“Isn’t that nice?” Lacey mindlessly says joyfully to Mr. Blue. “See, it seems heartless but it’s so convenient for you to walk away. Because I genuinely want to have nothing to do with you outside of the parameters of Heaven, should we both go there. And no, that’s not a sexual interaction for us at all. I would find that more likely to be close to my Hell.”
“You’re not being honest!” 99% of all living men insist of Lacey. Women are far less sure that that’s true. But many cower under the fear and decide she must just be a lesbian.
“Are you all demons?” asks Lacey almost sincerely.
“I doubt it.” says Pat Wilson to Lacey.
“Then how do you explain their obstinate idiocy?!?!” asks Lacey breathless at their repulsive, overwhelming response.
“Are men’s sexual-romantic minds owned by the Kennedy’s and therefore Lem had to be gay and I still have to be weak, vulnerable and disgusting?!” asks Lacey.
“We’re stronger than you!!!” a perfume hater yells at Lacey on cue.
“How did they buy you all?” Lacey asks them.
The Illuminati feels threatened.
“See that’s the thing. I keep thinking we need to humor her.” says Mrs. Blue to the Illuminati like she’s crisis managing a crazy, slutty, asinine, poor bunny boiler.
“You are soo in love with with fantasy. Aren’t you?” Lacey asks her, sincerely but bitingly.
“It’s not a fantasy!!!” shrieks a group of mildly unattractive but pampered, cool-girl Millennial women who undoubtedly are real sluts.
“They’re slurs!!! You make slurs!!!” yells a woman at Lacey from the grave.
“Then why are you so angry?!” Mrs. Blue asks Lacey, with profound idiocy.
“No!!! I make no bones about it. I cut through your perversely controlling attempts to make me dumb.” says Lacey to the woman in the grave.
“I’m angry because a. You’re delusional. b. You’re incapable of forgiving me for catching your husband’s eye regardless of how little genuinely even happened. c. You’re perversely stupid but highly publicly respected for your leadership and intellect. d. You are a stalker but you have narcissistic fantasies you seem to genuinely have a bizarre almost religious faith in of me being that instead. e. Your husband is objectively smug, ugly and disgusting and yet you enable him to think otherwise.” says Lacey to Mrs. Blue. “And most importantly you’ve violently terrorized my entire family and many other people as well. You and the people you’ve been sexually involved with your husband are like a small gang of serial killers via the Illuminati. …But you don’t have to be accountable to them because you are mildly important to the Illuminati and you’re officially a member. You guys are either really dumb or really evil. And honestly…you’re far worse than the Manson Family because you and Mr. Blue, and about five of his concubines have been spiritually responsible for the pandemic, the war in Ukraine, and who knows what else. …You…may…be…responsible for the pandemic. Think about it. You stalk me…and I’ve told you soo many times that I’m sorry and I’m over your husband. That I’m not even sure it was real. And yet you cling to your vain innocence?” asks Lacey. “Or is it possible that just because you were legally married, I had such real deep emotions that weren’t narcissistic…and I got angry when you started attacking me and you and your murderous gang can’t stand that I stand-up for myself…that you think I’m the Bunny Boiler. …Because you’re an intellectual fool and dolt. You think that if you’re married and a woman who threatens your sense of supremacy in the family gets angry…that that makes her a bunny boiler. Because that’s how weak and paltry your ugly literary analysis skills are.”
“How is she wrong?!?!” Glenn Close, losing her mind defends Mrs. Blue. “I can’t stand people like you!!!” she yells at Lacey.
“Who am I?” Lacey asks Glenn Close confused.
“Who am I?” Lacey asks Glenn Close who may have inspired Mrs. Blue to think of the idea of a Bunny Boiler in the first place. Feminists love to attack Lacey.
“Lacey can sense Glenn Close trying to use witchcraft and Joe Jr. to not look like a freakish idiot.” narrates Michael.
“Oh dear God…we’re Boomers.” says Glenn Close.
“Nice try.” says Lacey to Glenn Close. “Answer my question you silly, violent, peasant revolt artist.”
“Oh dear God, she’s serious!” says another Boomer actress who’s mildly ugly but made fitness movies that were supposedly sexual in the 1980’s. She’s being incredibly condescending to Lacey for reasons of social class in the actresses mind. She believes her actor parents and associations with the Kennedy family make her a true elite as well as the mostly shit films she made.
“Who am I?” Lacey asks Glenn Close again.
“I mean you’re just…” starts Glenn Close.
“I’m just what?” Lacey asks her.
“You’re nice!” she says to Lacey.
Lacey rolls her eyes. “That’s a tired insult. I’ve heard that insult from people like you most of my life. You’re so condescending!”
“You can destroy us all. Can’t you!?!” Glenn Close yells at Lacey is faux fear.
“Why do you Boomers hate me so much?” Lacey asks Glenn Close.
“I just can’t let go of it.” says Mrs. Blue.
“Oh no! You can destroy us all!” Glenn Close says to Lacey.
“Let go of what?” Lacey asks Mrs. Blue.
“You seduced my husband!” she says to Lacey.
“You seduced my boyfriend!” says one of his gang.
She tries to think back to what happened.
“I mean I tried to show him a bit of attention. But that’s almost all I did. And at heart it was flirting. But…that’s all I did.” says Lacey.
“It’s all about social class. They’re just insulted you aren’t more intimidated by them socially. Because that’s what they get their life from. From feeling superior to others not in the Illuminati. And they’re too brainwashed to realize they’re peasants compared to you in most ways.” says a perfume hater.
“True. I think it is also what we’ve been saying in this posthough. It’s both.” says Lacey.
“You just think we’re all such liars!” says Glenn Close to Lacey.
“Yes!” says Lacey.
“Getting back to that seduction-“ starts a witch.
Michael interrupts, “I’m tired of Lacey being treated like a criminal. What’s her crime?!”
“I didn’t realize I was being so…insensitive.” says Lacey to Mr. and Mrs. Blue.
“That’s a reference to me.” says Harold Loeb, smiling.
“You think we’re uptight?” Mrs. Blue asks Lacey.
“Not necessarily uptight, but…rigid. And hateful. And reactionary. And…paranoid. And obsessive and contradictory.” says Lacey. “You’re the Bunny Boilers. Not in superficialities. But in…heart, and deed, and mindset. Possibly.”
“Are you Rebecca or Mrs. de Winter.” asks a hater.
“I’m Rebecca if Rebecca wasn’t evil.” says Lacey.
“I’m Rebecca‘s lover. If she was genuinely innocent and sweethearted.” says Lem as if
“And I’m her husband. And she’d never cheat on me. …With anyone. Which is why I would have to be so careful not to cheat on her.” says Michael.
“Why does it seem like you guys really are the crazy one though?” asks a reader of the blog to the Illuminati.
“Why are you guys torturing her? Is it a peasant revolt? Did the peasants take over the Illuminati? Because if so…we’ll destroy you.” says Joan Fontaine to the Illuminati.
“Why?” Glenn Close stupidly asks Joan Fontaine to try to get in with her.
“I don’t think you get it. You really are all mostly just bizarre peasants at this point.” says Lacey. “See…J. P. really is that smart.” says Lacey. She sighs. She sighs. “See…he gave you all power. And purpose. And then all you had to do was be nice and leave me alone.”
“Why couldn’t you just leave me alone? I was dying inside. Possibly dying. But I was a mother. And I’d have clung to life just like I’m doing now. Other than my daughter…my life would have far better been left untouched.” Lacey thinks. “Your batch is pure narcissism…and there’s nothing in relation you can get high on. And I thought he loved me…but when I found out he didn’t a turned on a switch and pulled out my sword. To kill you by chopping off your heads if necessary because you declared war on my soul.” says Lacey.
“You’ll be back. Right? Because it’s the way you are. Right?” asks Lacey. “I mean dang! You all are so sassy and classy and badassy.”
“We’re trying to imitate you.” says Mrs. Blue trying by to be annoying?
“You weren’t stunned by Mr. Blue’s hot sex life? His drug use?” asks a witch of Lacey.
Lacey cracks-up laughing. She and Jack do a parody of the sort of worm who would have tried to sleep with their fathers.
To parody the women: They stand in an airport waiting. They pull out air traffic control lights and Lacey grabs a tambourine. She makes a sign out of cardboard and permanent marker to offer sex services. They shake their asses. Jump around. Start sending off fireworks. Do jumping jacks. Joe Jr. and Kick join them. It’s hilarious.
Then another Joe seemingly starts crying. It confuses Jack slightly but Lacey more.
“You knew?!” Joe whispers to Jack. As in, he can’t believe Jack knew his father was such a “sexual-philanthropist.”
“Some ‘sexual-philanthropists‘ are far more evil and creepy than others, clarify.” says Lacey.
“So…to keep the egalitarian, semi meritocracy we-“ starts Mr. Blue.
“Had.” says Michael.
“All you had to do was leave me alone or just not be a weirdo.” says Lacey to Mr. Blue and the Illuminati.
“You’re the polar opposite of a Bunny Boiler.” says a Millennial woman.
“What am I?” asks Lacey.
“You’re impossible to steal from.” says a witch.
“True! As much as I don’t know if I share anything in common with Glenn Close’s character at all anymore…I do refuse to be stolen from.” says Lacey.
“Lem!! Stop protecting yourself if you want to be with her!!” a man yells.
“I’m not that dumb. I know I have to protect both of us.” he says.
“I let myself look ugly because I’m prettier that way. Socially speaking.” says Mrs. Blue discussing why she’s never had plastic surgery on her face.
“I doubt you knew. But if that’s true, that’s silly. It’s still unattractive. Don’t you care?” asks Lacey.
“Honestly, if I got plastic surgery he’d stop loving me.” she responds. He being Mr. Blue.
“That’s perverse.” says Lacey.
Michael kissed Lacey’s neck. He sang in her ear first. Then he kissed her neck from behind. Like he wanted to eat her. She loves him very much. But she also loves Harold…Lem…and Louis.
So then she recalls Lem. Just in the nick of time, she thinks.
Lem’s hurt but then he’s schooled yet again on her real pain. Not the bullshit people want her pain to be for reasons of social class insecurity on their parts. But instead, her real pain.
“I can’t stand that Lem is straight. He controls her.” says a Paul in the Illuminati.
“I can’t stand that she cares about her readers.” says someone else in the Illuminati.
“And I’m confused.” says Lacey. “Goodnight.”