Gayest Soul

I think it’s unlikely the word gay didn’t secretly connate homosexuality in the past before it supposedly became popular slang in the 1940’s or so. It wasn’t popular but I have a feeling it existed based on what I’ve read and seen.

Homosexuals in the Illuminati struggle violently to accept that the possible ghost of Lem Billings has told Lacey repeatedly that he was heterosexual. Not even bisexual or pansexual, but heterosexual. Thankfully not clearly deranged as a pedophile or a narcissist either. He’s explained that he was molested and given the time it happened in and the beliefs of the time he internalized for both good and bad in he stupidly believed he was gay.

West End Blues by King Oliver And His Dixie Syncopators plays.

“So why did Jack call Lem the ‘gayest soul’?!” they pester Lacey by asking.

“Oh!! I bet it’s just because Jack was a narcissist! Right?!” asks a gay man in the Illuminati who knows he’s secretly enabling himself and other deluded people to believe it’s unlikely Lem was gay. Jack was gay possibly but…the narcissistic explanation seems a bit off somehow. And they all know that.

*Lacey rolls her eyes*

…Incidentally, the Lemp family feels grief for the state of Lacey’s life? Possibly.

And…they’re furious over this Lem business?

“So…what’s the story?” patronizingly asks a bourgeois female jerk in the Liberal Illuminati.

Smoke House Blues by Jelly Roll Morton’s Red Hot Peppers & Jelly Roll Morton plays.

“It’s actually quite tragic and fascinating.” starts Lacey.

They automatically bristle. They don’t want fascinating, tragic real takes on anything it seems? That requires intellectual, so-called pretentious historical understanding. It requires actual empathy. Actual depth as a human and maturity.

A gay man in Liberal Illuminati sighs, “Why can’t you just pretend you’re Jack reincarnated? We can’t handle it!!” he whines.

“Because I care about myself. That’s a sick thing to ask me to do!” says Lacey.

“But I’m more elite than you!!” he says automatically. “Right? Aren’t you supposed to be like…scared of upsetting me??”

“What if it’s the other way around?” asks Lacey.

“That’s fundamentally impossible!” says a Liberal Illuminati member aggressively to Lacey. He’s living on Long Island.

“I’m not so sure about that.” she says meekly. Quietly. Politely. Calmly. Kindly.

“Here’s the thing, Jack, based on what I’ve heard…was the one between the two men who was actually in love. Jack was truly in love as much as a man can love another man. And…in a state of narcissistic naïveté he stupidly overestimated his emotional security with Lem.” says Lacey.

“That happens to narcissists a lot!” says Louis.

“They overestimate their safety in things through some sort of blind arrogance?” suggests Lacey.

“Spot on!” says Louis.

“And the thing is…it seems Jack wanted and needed and genuinely believed Lem was the gayest soul. His Lemmers.” says Lacey. “He assumed it was thick, solid ice possibly for eternity regardless.” She thinks. “But Lem was seemingly actually straight based on what I’ve been told. He was very confused. A complex, mysterious…elusive person.” She thinks. “Seemingly, he genuinely thought he was gay for reasons that would seem fantastical and insane to most Americans today.” She thinks.

And at that Mr. Blue desperately tries to make Lem’s ghost say he’s gay. They can’t stand Lacey and long for her to be miserable.

Sobbin’ Blues plays.

“The thing is…Jack seemingly took those tragic misunderstandings on Lem’s part to heart. He bet his whole life on them, possibly.” says Lacey. She thinks. “He assumed Lem was as straightforward and simple minded as him.”

“Simple minded?” asks Joe Jr..

“Yup. Kind of like you?” Lacey says to him, bitterly.

“That’s not Joe Jr.!! We didn’t find you in 2015 writing about you and Joe Jr. being in love in coded stories on your blog.” says a Tom with vile narcissism in Illuminati.

“Except you did, of course.” says Lacey.

“Why are you all expecting Joe Jr.’s love to not really know him and his family at all?” asks a Lemp with a hopeful wink. “Could it be that she would and Pat did not?” He seethes. “Pat has suffered. Lacey has suffered. And yes, it seems you wildly overestimate your ability to be objective about social class in America.”

“It’s because they hate the British. They possibly think they need to conquer them.” says Lacey.

Black Snake Blues plays.

“Pat didn’t necessarily know a great many things.” says Lacey empathetically.

“Like what?” asks a gay man.

“Like how weak they all secretly are.” says Lacey. “How frighteningly vulnerable.” She thinks. “And you keep hoping Joe will pull through and be strong and finally either admit his love is and was a fraud or admit he’s a fool. But he never does.” She thinks. “He’s incapable of being strong enough to even do that.” She thinks. “And so I don’t trust him.” She thinks. “I’m not able to give him my heart or seemingly completely rid myself of him either.”

“French film in the 1960’s.” says a dead actor.

“Perfect.” says Lacey.

“And Jack is depressing. Because unlike Joe he seemingly has or had no idea what was going on at all.” says Lacey. “Or if he did eventually in the 1960’s it just enraged him as he felt bitterly betrayed. Or what? Violent? Soul crushed? …Lied to in general?” She thinks.

“It might have just not been a healthy relationship and the They uses this to torture you. If they know he was bisexual.” says a gay man reading to Lacey.

“I try to think that’s possible but…then someone tries to yell at me that I’m Jack reincarnated.” says Lacey. “And eventually I get this horrible sinking sense that Lem was straight.” She thinks. “I know I’m not Jack reincarnated.”

“No. She’s not Jack reincarnated.” says a Lemp.

“You guys do realize that she’s a real person and that they might still be too? Right?” asks an terrorist listening in.

Sugar Foot Stomp plays.

“I was straight!” yells Lem.

“The thing is…why can’t you be empathetic towards Jack?” asks Lacey. “Making vile sculptures of him raping Lem and Lem enjoying it in your delusional minds? If Lem was straight you’ve only just viciously mocked Jack’s awful pain and vulnerable derangement. His moral retardation was made into a statue that also mocks black pioneers in racial justice?!” She seethes. “In Boston?!!” She thinks. “That’s what it looks like to me. And honestly, if you all exist…don’t lie. You knew. The intent was to still what sacrifice me to assuage the earth for oil and so-called clean energy to merge?” asks Lacey. “It’s never going to work. It’s an idiotic, freakish conception.” She thinks. “You’re failures in that regard. Total jokes and losers. End of story. The end. I don’t have the patience to patronize you all.” She thinks. “Of course, sacrificing shit is dumb to begin with. Unless you’re an ancient Jew or God.”

“Or they’re just totally dysfunctional.” says a woman in her 80’s.

“And violently, psychopathically incompetent?” asks Lacey.

“Yes.” she ugly-admits.

“Was Jack comforted by Lem’s heterosexuality or even enjoyed the thought of hurting him for sadistic reasons?” asks a gay man.

“Mostly likely yes, if Lem was straight.” says Lacey.

—

Later.

So…Pat loves Joe Jr.. But she’s not Lacey. And it’s unclear what that means to Joe. …Lem is enraged. …Jack may be in Hell or close to it for defying God in the afterlife. And the Liberals refuse to accept the thought that Lem is mad at them for insisting he was gay, Jack may be morally weak…that Pat is suffering…that they’re a problem…and that God isn’t just a stupid jackass?

“She’s not going to genuinely lie to you.” says a Lemp. “Or is she? And if so, why?” He thinks. “Do you want for her to tell y’all that you is…ahh…possibly going to Hell for eternity?” He thinks. “If she told you that would you all die?”

—