Mishima

They’ve sadistically bullied Lacey for over seven years. They could have found ways to deal with it all more appropriately but it’s like they can’t entirely control themselves. And that’s their fault.

This morning as Lacey woke up she saw a man who looked like Colin Jost dressed as Michael Rockefeller. Not necessarily Colin Jost but someone who looks like Colin Jost. …He was trying to mimic Michael Rockefeller.

*Lacey laughs*

Apparently this man is exhausted trying to channel Michael Rockefeller. Somehow the Illuminati convinced him that he either was Michael reincarnated or they thought he had the same “vibe” as Michael Rockefeller. He’s not Michael.

Sunday by DJ Day plays.

But Lacey has had problems with Hollywood casting choices for decades. It seems that overseas the casting has been better. But in the US they rarely get it truly right.

“You all misunderstood me too.” says Lem to them.

“We think the Colin Josts of the world are fantastic but they are themselves.” says Lacey.

Lacey stares in rage at God, but still worships him while a witch tries to express how she’s able to be like Maria Callas. It’s because they’re alike.

“The thing is…you’re edging us toward extinction.” says Lacey. “Just because the music still can be heard doesn’t mean you’re not going to Hell for your evil if you don’t repent.”

“She’s not channeling me.” says Maria Callas.

“Then what am I doing?” a witch asks Lacey.

“You’re just impersonating her and then you lose track of your reality and demons fool you.” says Lacey. “She may be there, actually. It’s like you called her phone number maybe? So she listens or God does. And at times maybe God does allow us to hear the ghost’s response or even channel them for our protection but it’s not like it happens so often and so so easily. And in some cases like pedophilia things are thankfully impossible. …I suspect it’s not meant to be impossible to contact Michael Rockefeller but I think it has become impossible.”

“Can we contact any of your gang other than you?” asks a witch.

“Not likely.” says Michael.

“You’re literally enslaving their kids. Literally.” says a reader of the blog. They mean to suggest that the Illuminati needs to wake-up and realize that they’ve got those ultra elite dead people’s kids in horror shoes they’ve made their lives. Based on some deranged idea of their parents or a Satanic fouled up sacrifice Lacey’s family to control oil and clean energy both.

“How do you sense that?” asks Mr. Blue without irony of the blog reader.

Astronaut In The Ocean by Masked Wolf plays as Mr. Blue has decided that that’s his “vibe.”

“There is no God!!” yells the crowd who claim to be protecting Mr. & Mrs. Blue and Co..

“I’m sorry, but you’re wrong.” says Lacey. “There is a God but the entities you’re talking to may or may not be able to handle that fact.”

Let The Drummer Kick by Citizen Cope plays.

Lacey listens to fight them using the Holy Spirit and the fools insist they will prevail.

“Nah, bitch! We is poor!” says the American Catholic Church to Lacey. Possibly the Western Catholic Church.

“Oh! And in your pathetic state Jesus compensates?” asks Lacey. “Then where is your Jesus power?”

“Should we just blow up the west?” China asks Lacey kindly.

She breathes a sigh of relief. Now things are on the right track again.

But before the Illuminati can intelligently process the situation at hand Mr. Blue insists his presence.

“She came in through me. I’m her handler!” he insists.

“You inculcated me in against my will.” says Lacey.

“Dammit! Why does she always demand that her little life matters to us?!” asks Erin. “Wait, no I get it. It’s because her kids are in sex slavery now. But…it’s still annoying. She isn’t Wobbly.”

“It’s a lie. There’s no way all those kids could be kids anyway.” says a Western witch.

“That’s not true. They’re all my kids.” says Lacey. She thinks. “Now don’t try to get them to attack me. And don’t be stupid.” She thinks. “It’s your fault they’re suffering. And possibly not mine at all.”

“It’s funny. It’s like they don’t get that we could just kill you all.” says Putin.

“It’s up to you.” Lacey says to Putin, cheerfully. But she prays he does press it if necessary. And actually most Americans agree.

“Push the button!” yell the pedophilic arrangers at Putin through Lacey.

“You can’t tell Putin what to do.” says Lacey.

And then the pedophilic arrangers believe it works anyway. Because they can’t process that they’re insane. And they can’t process that they want Putin to kill them and put them out of their misery of being so lost to life. …Because going to Purgatory or close to Hell is better than being alive if you’re a pedophile.

“Listen, if Putin doesn’t kill you…maybe we can get a hurricane or something to kill you all.” says Lacey. “How about an earthquake?”

She’s being serious.

“I just don’t get how your family’s oil matters in this conversation. And honestly…I don’t really understand the Electoral College.” says Erin.

“I don’t get the Electoral College either. I mean…why does it matter. Right?” asks Mr. Blue.

“Do you respect the Norwegian Royal Crown?” asks a self-titled pleb of Mr. Blue.

He laughs. He pretends to be shooting basketball hoops like a cocky jock. “I’m not threatened by them or you.”

“‘Yeah, you and who’s army!’ is my favorite thing to say to people like that.” says Erin who will now call Batgirl III. Why Batgirl III. Because Erin is being mocked for being such a stupid loser by Lacey. If you use logic it’s quit obvious that Lacey is the one who’d call her Batgirl. Right?

Erin is Batgirl? Yup. Not the actual Batgirl. She’s a fake Batgirl who saves the city at night from oil. She goes to the gas stations and finds what she considers clever ways to drain our oil supply by flooding the streets with it.

“See…if Lacey is too powerful because of her oil…and if the gas is connected to her oil…then…if I extinguish it from the pump then…it’ll set the flow.” Erin says to herself coyly. “It’s my evil plan!” *she cackles* And she believes that through witchcraft it’ll work.

Silence.

“Oil is…not cool. I can control it.” says Erin.

“What do you mean?” asks Michael Rockefeller.

Erin snarls a laugh.

“It’s whatever God thinks is best. I’m sorry I can’t offer a better response at this time.” Lacey says to the Chinese.

Silence.

“Go on Erin.” says Michael.

“You’re not relevant!” Batgirl III says to Michael. “See! That pause was because I’m superior to you! I’m wreaking havoc!”

“Tell us more about your plans in the gas stations!” says Lacey.

“I don’t do that!” says Batgirl III. “You are making a joke of my life.” She seethes. “I make myself a star everyday. You’ve never made yourself a star.”

Lacey yawns. “Tell us more about my inferior family or your impression of what the Electoral College is.” says Lacey.

“It’s like a college. From the Latin collegium.” says Erin a.k.a. Batgirl III. Batgirl III as in Batgirl the third. Apparently there were two other similar Batgirls?

…

Later.

Batgirl III starts a fire in the stream of oil flowing down the street. Somewhere in Illinois.

Why?

Shine by Wild Belle starts playing.

“Why? Why is the Electoral College important if it’s like a college?” Lacey asks Erin.

“Because it’s Latin. See I just get the cheat codes.” she says, filing through the cheat codes to the world in her purse with her long, fake plastic nails.

“And then what do you do with them?” Lacey asks as the fire spreads.

Batgirl III stares ahead in defiance of Lacey.

“I take no credit for Erin because if I do I have to be an atheist to fathom myself.” interrupts the entire Middle East and Africa.

“Why is the Electoral College important?” Lacey asks Batgirl III.

“Because it’s…like a college.” she says.

“How does it affect us?” asks Lacey of Batgirl III.

“It makes it all gel together like a cake.” says Erin.

“What answer does Batgirl III have?” asks Lacey.

“I don’t know.” she says. “But if I think about it with help I do.”

“So with your Millennial intellect-hacks and the help of the Illuminati you seem like you know more than you do.” says Lacey.

Batgirl III laughs.

“Are you proud to be truck driver’s daughter?” Lacey asks her.

Batgirl III looks miffed.

“Why are you starting that fire?” she asks Erin.

Batgirl III stares at Lacey in response.

“Why are you starting that fire?” Lacey asks her.

“I didn’t.” says Batgirl III.

“Yes! You did.” says Lacey.

“I can’t help it.” she says.

“You like fire?” Lacey asks.

“I just thought it would release the facilities from compensation rights.” says Batgirl III.

“Hey, no thanks, lady!” Mr. Blue appears to save Erin by calling Lacey a pedophile for talking to Erin considering how stupid Erin is in comparison to Lacey.

“But by that logic Erin, as an adult, should be allowed to start the fires?” asks Lacey. “If she was a child breathing you and your pedophilic order would claim to feel morally offended. And you’d use that pretense you created in the Illuminati to molest the children and feel you might be morally correct.” She thinks. “That’s idiotic. And you’re so stupid maybe you should just all actually be euthanized?” She thinks. “And now, if we don’t get to it and Jill you all…quickly…you’ll cause more chaos? Abuse more kids?”

“How did Batgirl III and Mr. Blue and Mrs. Blue turn abusing kids into almost a genuinely good thing in plebs’ minds?!” asks a reader.

“Through their Illuminati privileges awarded by their employers and those higher up who work for, etc., etc..” says Lacey.

“So they’re trying to crucify Michael Rockefeller’s wife?” asks the perfume community, giggling.

“Be careful.” Lacey says to the perfume community.

Silence.

“Did your family teach you that you had an excuse to be evil?” Lacey asks Erin.

“I’m Erin from a farm family and we kick ass!!” says Batgirl III.

“So you like to start fires?” asks Lacey.

“Yeah! Sure do! You betcha!” says Erin, a.k.a. Batgirl III.

Humoring her in a likely attempt at self-defense, “So…you should start fires everywhere. Just start lighting gas stations on fire with the proper warning made to the police and gas station owner first.”

“Good idea.” say the Christian Charismatics.

“How about you also go to Ireland and try to investigate the caves with Mr. Blue. Literally.” says Lacey.

Silence.

“Have the Illuminati open up one of those caves. Literally. Go inside. Look around.” says Louis.

“We can’t.” says Erin.

“Why not?” asks Lacey.

“Because we jus can’t!” says Erin.

“Why not?” asks Lacey.

“Because we have work to do.” Erin says.

“Well, you’re not child sex slaves so what’s the problem if you’re so elite?” asks Lacey.

“So you want literally Chris and Erin to go into a cave alone?” asks Mr. Blue.

“An ancient, sealed Celtic cave used during Samhain.” says Lacey. She thinks. “Just a second. I’ll find one.” She thinks. “Turns out the sealed cave I had hoped to find may not be easily researched online at a moment’s notice. So…how about Oweynagat Cave.” says Lacey.

“You want Mr. Blue and I to literally physically go to Oweynagat Cave to figure out what’s going on sorta?” asks Batgirl III.

“To get a sense of who you’re talking to.” says a demon. “See…there are demons who the Irish worshipped and they might meet you there.”

“Wow! Should that demon be allowed to tell them that? That’s self-defeating for the demons.” says Lacey.

“So…Oweynagat Cave?” asks Erin.

“Yeah?” says Lacey, laughing.

“What if I don’t want to go there with Mr. Blue.” says Erin.

“Why?” asks Lacey. “It’s creepy?” She thinks. “Why is it creepy?”

Someone suddenly accuses Lacey of having sex with Erin a.k.a. Batgirl III.

“No! Certainly not!!! Never! If she’s raped me while I was unaware then maybe she’s raped me, but it’s never been consensual and it’s never been something I was or am aware of. I’m not attracted to anyone but men. And I’ve never-I don’t do that to myself. That’s vile. I know I’m not a lesbian.”

The Illuminati then erupts in chaos to Breathe Deeper. They start struggling to find a way to destroy Lacey and her kids and family.

“Mr. Blue spiritually walks into the Oweynagat Cave and what happens? His eyes light up.” says Lacey. “As in, they glow in the dark.”

“Aliens?” asks an Elon Musk.

“Or something earthly.” says Lacey. “And horrific? Or…sad?” She thinks. “Do you see well in the dark?” she asks him. “Or perhaps candlelit caves?” She thinks. “How do you conjure things so naturally?”

“Chris, are we very distantly related?” Joe Jr. asks him.

“That’s an interesting-“ starts a man in the Illuminati.

“So…we still need to physically go into the caves?” asks Batgirl III of Lacey.

“Yes!” says Lacey.

“Why?” asks Erin, the Batgirl III of Oweynagat Cave.

“I’m Mr. Blue by day and Batman when I want evil or when I want fries or when I want free tickets.” says Mr. Blue.

“Of Oweynagat Cave?” asks Lacey.

“Or some Samhain Cave?” asks Louis Hill.

“Or some occult practice in where Eastern Europe? Italy?” Lacey asks Mr. Blue.

He seemingly isn’t sure.