Poison

Daylight by David Kushner plays.

Lacey is…alone.

Does she indulge or not? In what? Analyzing reincarnation. If she was reincarnated…the photo above maybe is slightly what she looked like. Except with darker hair. Possibly with dark brown eyes. AI always analyzes Lacey’s face…and soul…better than almost any living humans do.

Another Love by Tom Odell plays.

“I feel for you.” says a man in the Illuminati identifying himself as a Kennedy.

“Oh, fuck you!” says Lacey. “You are the most pretentious bastards I’ve ever met.”

“We’re not that pretentious!” says a woman claiming to have married until the family in the Illuminati.

“Oh fuck your too, you conceited, arrogant bitch.” says Lacey casually. She laughs. “Ha!”

“Lacey, I’m sorry.” says Gore Vidal.

And at that Lacey almost allows herself to cry.

About The Weather by Tom Rosenthal plays.

“Lacey you shouldn’t call yourself an author.” says a Kennedy.

“You barely read, you perverted ass!” says Lacey. “Go shoot yourself in the head to make me smile, Jack.”

“Lacey…why are you angry?” asks David.

Look Back & Laugh by David Kushner plays.

“Go ask Lem.” says Lacey as she leaves.

Her ghost takes of her Birkenstocks and walks barefoot away from the Kennedy Cape Cod mansion. A car runs over her. She’s hurt…but…she decides to lay on the pavement and enjoy herself.

She glares up at God.

Meant to Stay Hid by SYML plays.

Lem stands…newly dead in 1981…and sees her laying there on the ground. Beautiful Lacey in 1910’s lacey summer haute couture on the ground. She weeps.

Suddenly she looks like she’s considering napping in the street. Just laying there…letting cars run over her.

And Lem…is…baffled.

He starts walking slowly toward her.

And at that Louis Hill Jr. from the future…stabs him in the heart with a dagger, jumping out of nowhere to do so.

Me and My Husband by Mitski plays.

Lem is…shocked.

F. Scott Fitzgerald takes Lem to the 1920’s. In an odd Woody Allen moment with Hemingway…they sit at a Paris cafe. It’s smoky, busy and Lem drinks absinthe…

“Are you a homosexual?” Hemingway confronts Lem. “You talk like one who’s…inhaled a helium balloon.”

“You aren’t really a homosexual are you?” asks Scott, intrigued.

“What makes you think that?” asks Lem.

Hemingway and Fitzgerald stare at him.

“You act and talk like one…but you don’t seem authentic.” says Scott. “So, you’re either desperately hiding your true identity…or you’re not really gay.”

Lem thinks. He sinks into his seat.

“Oh! I might not have been?!?” scoffs Hemingway in imitation of Lem. He’s annoyed.

Perfect Life by Belong plays.you

“So you see that man over there dancing?” asks Hemingway of Lem. “That’s Harold Loeb. Robert Cohn.”

Lem becomes nervous. Taps his foot.

“He’s fucked your wife.” says Hemingway.

“So have I.” says Scott.

“You don’t want a wife though, so no matter!” says Hemingway. “I haven’t, in case you’re wondering. She’s not a slut, you gross bastard.” He pours back a drink, laughs.

Scott laughs. Then he morphs into Louis.

Midnight Snack by HOMESHAKE plays.

“I partied in the 1960’s too on occasion.” says Louis. He laughs. “I hated myself for it though.” He laughs.

Lem stares at him.

“I’m in love with your wife. …And you don’t know her like I do.” says Louis. “At all.” He laughs and then cries.

“Do you know his wife?” asks Jerome suddenly sitting across the table from Lem. Hemingway is gone. Scott is gone. But Harold in all his 1920’s glory dances in the background. A group of women circle around him, all vying for his attention.

“No! I’ve never met her…” says Lem.

“You’ve never slept with her? …Really?!” asks Lou.

“No. Why?” asks Lem, uneasy.

He sees Jack sitting at a table awkwardly.

“Wanna go join your friend?” asks Hemingway suddenly appearing. “I’m asking so Louis can get rid of you, if you’re at all interested.”

Michael suddenly gets in Lem’s face now. “My cock has been in Lacey’s mouth.” he says.

“Oh! It’s all just an animalistic way of saying I love you!” says Mary drinking at the table now. “I marry your son. He leads me to want to hang myself…so…I do!”

Jack turns and waves at Lem. He smiles sheepishly at Lem. Shrugs.

“I don’t have a son. And how are you talking to me…if you’re not dead yet?!” asks Lem.

“I’m not dead yet.” says Mary. “You’re right!” she says leaning in as she smiles. “But…precious…you are!”

“He’s not your son! You never had a son!” says Hemingway. “Or did you?”

Lem thinks. “Who was that woman?”

“You know who she is.” says Hemingway.

“I’m in love with her. And you’re an asshole who doesn’t care. Right?” asks Michael. “You don’t mind…if I take her for eternity, I’m sure.”

Jack wanders over and in front of everybody says, “Lem…let’s go home.”

Scott grins. “In 2022 when Michael fucks Lacey…you could be married to JFK!”

“Come on, love bug! Let’s go home!” says Jack to Lem.

“Or don’t you want to actually be married to Jack?” asks Hemingway.

Lem laughs. “I don’t…want to get married…to him?”

“Oh, okay! But why not? Isn’t that a dream come true for you?” asks Scott.

“Who was that woman?” asks Lem.

Jack shrugs. Laughs. “We can separate sometimes and have sex with women.”

“That’s an open marriage.” says Lem. “You…don’t…want to marry me, Jack.” He laughs his laughs. “Let’s…be friends.”

“No! Let’s not! You were never my friend!” says JFK.

“That’s what my title was!” says Lem.

Jack looks uncomfortable. “That’s what we called you, Lem!”

“So what.” says Lem coldly.

“That’s rude!” says JFK.

Lem looks sorry. He thinks. “You were a good friend.” he says, fawning.

Jack smiles to himself aroused in victory.

“Anyway…I’ve got to go!” says Lem.

Jack looks uneasy.

“Where are you going?” asks Jerome.

“She’s at my house.” says Louis. “In my bed.”

Jerome laughs.

Jack looks confused. “I hate that woman. I’d sleep with her! But…she’s annoying.”

“Why is she annoying?” asks Scott at another table.

“Because she’s so hard to follow.” says JFK. “She’s difficult to comprehend.” He shrugs. “And I think she makes herself that way!”

“You trued to sleep with her too!” says Lem.

Jack nods. “Yeah! So what??”

“Why is she in your bed?!” Lem asks Lou.

“Because her head got hurt.” says Louis.

“She fell down the stairs and smashed her head into a radiator.” says Jack laughing at Lacey. He eats some peanuts.

“Oh! Yeah.” says Lem. “What just happened?! It’s like I went in and out of time?”

“Your dead!” says Zelda.

“So, let’s go!” says Jack.

A naked woman jumps out of a cake. The lights dim.

Jack pulls out an engagement ring. He slides it across the table. All eyes are on them.

“Lem…”. Jack looks into Lem’s eyes. “You…made me…love.”

Lem hears it.

“You accomplished with your heart…and your genius for romance…what nobody else ever could. And I…adore you, my love.” says Jack to Lem. He looks overwrought. “If not for your patience with me…I’d be a much smaller man.” He cries. “If not for your eyes…I’d never truly smile.” He laughs. “And your arms. And legs. And ass!” Jack winks.

“Where’s Lacey?” asks Lem of Michael.

Jack furrows his brow in earnest confusion.

“She’s in my bed.” says Louis. “You never wanted her.”

“Actually, she’s with me!” says Michael.

Jack looks increasingly confused. Then he sighs in boredom.

“Where is she?!” asks Lem.

“At my table.” says Michael.

“Where?!?” asks Lem.

“Over there!” says Michael.

Louis jumps out of his seat and darts over to Michael’s table. Suddenly he’s dancing with Lacey. She’s dressed for the 1940’s.

Petite Fleur by Sidney Bechet plays.

“That’s not my wife?!” says Lem.

“Anyway! Lemmers…will…you…marry me?!?”asks Jack.

Lem looks back at Jack. “I can’t take my eyes off you, can I?” Lem laughs. Then he cries.

“Yeah, that’s why it’s us. Us.” says Jack. “Did you hear me?! I said, US.”

Lem stands up from the table, grabs his plate of food and then smashes the food into Jack’s face. He laughs. …Then he picks the plate up and smashes the plate over Jack’s head. Then he strangles Jack’s neck with his bare hands while laughing.

Doctor Blues by Luis Russell And His Orchestra plays.

Jack falls to the ground.

Lem looks over and sees Lacey staring at him thoughtfully. Once he looks at her she smiles kindly and then quickly looks away.

Expecting him to not be noticing her anymore she glances back in his direction curiously. Louis is dancing with his second wife now.

Jack comes back. Sits up.

“I’m back!” he says wiping mashed potatoes and gravy off his head, laughing. He grins. “Let’s go get married, Lem!”

But Lem is walking towards Lacey who tries not to look confused.

All Of Me by Sidney Bechet plays.

Lacey looks upset by the song. Lem, smiling, walks up to Lacey touches her arms with both of his hands. Grabs them. She looks down, collects herself, looks up into Lem’s eyes. And before she can speak he kisses her on her mouth.

She lets him. He picks her up and carries her out of the cafe’s back exit to the alley. He carries her to a hotel in town. Carries her up to a bedroom. Opens the door, throws her onto the bed. Shuts the door. Locks it. And then climbs on top of her.

She sighs, exasperated.

“I’m not sure what you want, but I want tea.” says Lacey.

Michael looks worried. He can sense something.

Lem kisses Lacey. She relaxes and then moves her head away. Wraps her arms around him.

“Are you evil?” she asks Lem sincerely.

“I’d have slept with you before marriage.” says Lem. “But…I’d have married you, all the same.”

“You’d never ask. Nobody has ever asked me to marry them.” says Lacey.

“I could easily make love to you right now. But…you want to be loved.” says Lem. “Will you marry me?” he says. “Yes! You are right! You will!”

“You left me to die.” says Lacey.

He kisses her mouth.

She moves her head away.

“You left me to die.” says Lacey.

“I don’t care! I’m sick of being nice!” says Lem.

Lacey listens sweetly.

“You’re mine!” says Lem to Lacey.

“Don’t mock me!” says Lacey gently.

“Oh, I’m not mocking you! You’re mine.” says Lem to Lacey.

“I hate that song!” says Lacey. “Why don’t you understand, I’m suffering.” she says.

“Not for long. I know what you like!” says Lem.

“That’s gross!” says Lacey.

He smiles. Laughs. “No, it’s not.”

“No, it is. I’m not that crass.” says Lacey.

“When did you stop thinking I could love you?” asks Lem.

“When did you turn me into a cheap, stupid floozie?” asks Lacey.

“I know what you like!” says Lem.

“No, you don’t. And if you do…then you don’t love me.” says Lacey.

“What did you want to say to me…in the cafe?” asks Lem.

“That I hope you and Jack have a very happy marriage. I’m just going to take a nap.” says Lacey.

Summertime by Sidney Bechet plays.

“That’s bullshit, Lacey. …I can’t love anyone but you. Not…really. And…I’m not afraid to be dumber than you…if I even am at all. …I don’t care if you’re unhappy. I am too.” He looks into her eyes. “I don’t…like it. But I don’t care about what people think of you. I’m not like that.” says Lem to Lacey. “You’re sad. That’s okay.”

“I’m not just sad. I’m ugly. And serious. And…horribly unloved and unpopular. Yet…peculiarly loved and popular. It’s…disgusting.” says Lacey.

“I’m sorry I picked you up. I should have. But not like that. That was…clumsy. I…love you, is all. And…I don’t love Jack. …What if I never did?” says Lem.

“Then you don’t love me!” says Lacey.

Lem laughs.

“Why…are you laughing?” asks Lacey.

“I didn’t know you were Jack!” says Lem.

“Oh, but I was! Because you love Jack…forever. And who am I compared to JFK?! …I’m nothing. And…he’s somebody! So…just go find him. If you give one shit about me I’m probably just him anyway, right?” asks Lacey. “Reincarnated.”

“You’re not Jack reincarnated.” says Lem.

“Just let me be miserable. I’m tired of being hurt.” says Lacey.

“You’re not being hurt!” says Lem.

“Don’t lie!!” says Lacey.

“No!” says Lem.

“You stopped wanting me…before I was made by God.” says Lacey sincerely.

And at that Jack feels that he’s being insulted and hurt. He feels sorry for himself.

“No! That’s nonsense.” says Lem to Lacey.

“I’m not Jack, you know. I was being deceitful to test you.” says Lacey.

“You’re not Jack.” says Lem.

“What do you want from me?” she asks.

“All of you. I ignored the song.” says Lem. “But I wanted all of you.”

“Am I like Jack?” asks Lacey.

“No! He’s charming. And glib. And…not worth talking about.” says Lem.

She goes silent.

“I’m sorry.” he says weakly. “You’ve lost hope almost entirely in me.”

She goes silent.

Then she says, “I don’t think you understand how little I have to offer. I’m…death.”

Lacey sits in her house drinking tea.

Prelude For Piano No. 4 In E Minor by Chopin plays.

“I’m death too!” says Louis joining her in the twilight of Minnesota in May.

“Don’t be silly?” says Lacey sadly.

“No, I really am.” he says.

She looks at him. “But you’re…beautiful!”

He closes his eyes and smiles. Sinks down next to her. “We are.”

Nocturne No. 2 in E Flat by Chopin plays.

“Why are we so…deadly?” asks Lacey of Louis.

“We love sex.” says Louis.

“Why don’t they?! …Jack doesn’t?!” says Lacey confused.

“They’re not like us. …He’s a fool. He loved five seconds of it here and there. But he barely understood what it really is at all.” says Louis. “It’s not right. What he did. It’s not right. But Lem has to pay the price.”

“I’m exhausted.” says Lacey.

“You’re right.” says Louis.

“You’re not going to be able to lose me.” says Lem to Lacey.

“I don’t have people. What an insult!” says Lacey.

“I’m sorry.” says Lem. “I didn’t ruin your novel. Someone else did.”

“Go fuck Jack!!!!” yells Lacey throwing him off of her or trying to.

“I’m trying to tell you, I’m trying to tell you that that line…about us and how much I love you more than anyone else to ever exist…was real. I wanted that line to be used.” says Lem.

“But then how was the line supposed to go?” asks Lacey.

“I’m sorry, I’m not like Louis. He was a truly great man.” says Lem crying. “Let’s make love and lose ourselves to each other. ‘I don’t need to make love to find out if I love you more than anyone else to ever exist…but I need you.”

“Why?!” asks Lacey.

“Because your body is my Heaven.” says Lem.

“It’s just my body.” says Lacey.

“I agree! And I’ll take it!” says Louis.

“You don’t mean really take it?!!?” asks Lacey.

“He’s coming on to you. And I want to posses you.” says Lem.

“Like a demon?” asks Lacey.

“No!” says Lem laughing facetiously. “No! No! Lacey…no.” He thinks. “I’m not kidding! He wants you.”

Lacey thinks. “No, he doesn’t.”

Lem laughs. “Huh. So…you think that.”

“Go be with Jack.” says Lacey.

“And you’ll be alone?” asks Lem.

“I’ll take naps and listen. I’ll be invisible.” says Lacey.

“And no one is going to remember to think of you even for a second?” asks Lem.

“No. Other than my kids. But otherwise I’ll just nap.” says Lacey.

He vomits. And vomits.

Crying he wipes his mouth, “You don’t think anyone will try to make love to you?”

“No! I doubt it!” says Lacey.

“That’s insane!” says Lem.

“No…don’t patronize me.” says Lacey.

“That’s an interesting way of seeing things.” says Lem smiling like she’s crazy.

She smiles kindly, weakly. “Do you have some feelings for me?”

“Yeah!” he says. “What do you think of that?”

“That’s…oh who cares what I think!?” says Lacey. “Right?”

“Especially about me!” he says.

“No. I love you.” she says. “But…I don’t think my opinion matters unless it matters to you.”

“Right. Got it.” he says. “Hmm…well…Louis and Michael and Harold want you.”

“That’s not that many people.” says Lacey.

He smiles. “There are lots of other men who do. Lots.”

“Maybe in a meaningless way.” says Lacey.

“But they do.” says Lem.

“It’s just nonsense.” says Lacey.

“What do you really think of Jack?” asks Lem.

“I think he’s childish. But everyone else loves a man like him.” says Lacey.

“I don’t.” says Lem.

“It’s difficult to believe that.” says Lacey.

“So you think he’s…what?” asks Lem.

“Childish, boring, predictable…dull as dirt…cliche…shallow…needy…eventually possibly clingy…boring…meaningless…did I mention dull?” asks Lacey.

“What do you think he’d be like in bed?” asks Lem.

“When I was young I would have imagined he was good..but being almost 40 and having some experience I can say he is probably…cliche…boring and very conventional.” says Lacey.

“How did you get that experience if no one wants wants you?” asks Lem.

“It’s mysterious.” says Lacey.

“Well…you must know somehow. Someone must have wanted you.” says Lem.

“I doubt it.” says Lacey.

“Sweetheart, that’s insane.” says Lem.

“How?” asks Lacey.

Lem laughs. “What do you suppose is happening?! And what do you mean by conventional?”

“He’s only going after what’s most…self-aggrandizing do to in bed. And that’s so common. So many people focus only on themselves and look at sex as a way to only reveal their credit score and foot size…but nothing more. And of course that’s idiotic. But it’s common to be that…stupid and dull.” says Lacey. “People sing the same way. And it’s annoying. But that’s why those singing shows are so popular because most people’s voices aren’t that great. …They’re only worth hearing if you like the voice. Otherwise…it’s just…screeching. And I’m sure Jack is a terrible singer, so to speak.” She thinks. “I…I don’t know. It was accidental?”

“Like what happened accidentally?” asks Lem.

“They…thought I was someone else?” wonders Lacey.

“Who?” asks Lem.

“Some…pretty woman?” wonders Lacey.

“Who isn’t you?” asks Lem.

“Lem…I’m lost.” says Lacey.

He smiles. “So…they thought you were you. But it doesn’t seem like that. Why?” asks Lem.

“Because the sex was good…”. She thinks. “Good enough! But…given how decent it was…or one time how bad it was…I should be being loved. I should be happy. Truly. …But I don’t feel quite…as happy as I should be.”

“That’s because you’re good in bed. …Were they?” asks Lem.

“There is no such thing as being good in bed.” says Lacey.

“You’re right.” says Lem.

“They were…fascinating.” says Lacey.

He laughs. “You’d rather have just been with one man forever.”

“It’s just idiotic! It’s like walking into someone else’s house.” says Lacey. “Some stranger.”

“And you feel…rude?” asks Lem.

“I repulse myself!” says Lacey.

“But no one ever truly walks into your home?” asks Lem.

“No.” says Lacey.

“You’re with me though.” says Lem.

“Not if Jack owns you.” says Lacey. “And not if you don’t walk into my house…”

“I’m not owned by Jack. And…I don’t care. I own your house.” says Lem. “It’s mine.”

“You hurt me.” says Lacey.

“Fine. That’s too bad. Really…” says Lem.

“You’ll chicken out?” wonders Lacey.

“No. You chicken out.” says Lem.

“How?” asks Lacey.

“You should just let me scare you.” says Lem. “Not like a ghost. I mean…scare you.”

“But you want Jack anyway.” says Lacey.

“No!” he says. He smiles. “You don’t realize how much I want you.”

“You don’t want me.” says Lacey.

“I want you!” says Lem.

“What if I just was myself entirely though?” asks Lacey.

“And ‘Jack could always be himself around Lem. Lem provided unconditional love, always.’ according to people who are supposed to know.” says Lem.

Lacey goes quiet.

“I sounded cold.” says Lem.

“They either don’t care…or my opinion is meaningless. See!” says Lacey.

“But when are you ever wrong?” asks Lem.

Lacey thinks. “Have I been wrong about men?”

“No! They…looked you in the eyes in a sexy way…and then claimed you imagined it. Every time. And you know you didn’t imagine it. It was intensely sexual eye-contact.” says Lem.

“Why did they do that?!” asks Lacey. “It almost seems petty.”

“They didn’t want you to know that they found you attractive because they enjoyed the power they felt with you not knowing.” says Lem. “It was mostly heartless.”

“They were such liars.” says Lacey.

“But…that’s why. No one is ever clear enough and so many men have lied. Giving you sexy signs of arousal and then giving you lies when you ask them out after they oogle you or stare into your eyes heatedly from across a room with a come hither look. …Or if they are clear…they aren’t clear enough.” says Lem. “You always have to wonder because you’re fastidious psychologically and intellectually and you know…that’s the thing. You’ve lost track. You have!” he says laughing.

“Because I keep track…and then get confused because it doesn’t fit together properly?” says Lacey.

“Yes!” he says.

She blinks.

“I’m going through talking.” says Lem. She smiles. “Come to bed with me.” He grabs her hand.

“I’m exhausted.” says Lacey.

“Then let’s go to bed!” he says.

“Mm… Okay.” says Lacey.

“I love being married to you.” says Lem to Lacey.

“Hmm.” says Lacey.

“Yes, let’s go to bed!” says Lem.

“You don’t want to.” says Lacey.

“No! You’re wrong.” he says. “Come on.”

“That’s…morose and strange!” says Lacey.

“Goodnight, Internet!” says Lem.