Snobbery

Get Into It by Doja Cat plays.

Mr. Blue is the Batman.

And when he saw the photo above he thought of Carolyn Kennedy. In 2016.

“Except…they don’t look that much alike.” says Lem. “That’s Lacey above but…we had to possibly literally kill her for a second to take that photo… She goes white in her head. It’s a bright light in her head that flashes for a second and then she goes back?”

“You sound like a gay black man above Lem.” says a gay hater.

“No! I don’t. But you can read it that way.” he says, exasperated. “Meaning, you can make my words sound that way in your head…not in reality.”

“So how do we go from thinking she looks like Carolyn Kennedy to violently insisting for years that she’s evil white trailer trash?!?” asks Sean Collins.

“No. Not all shire people are the same.” says Lacey to Africa. “Shire meaning white.”

“Fine.” says an African. He thinks. “You don’t mean guilt versus innocence.”

“Of course not you racist or bitter darkie?” says Lacey. “Is that your bitter peach, Tom Ford?!” She thinks. “Shake your slutty ass, you liar?”

“I’m not a slut!” he insists.

“Your whole perfume line is based on being a proud slut!” says Lacey. “Stop insulting me!”

“I agree.” says the African to Lacey.

“We’re not all like that. But also…we’re not all like that.” says Lacey.

“I don’t like Tom Ford. …The cherry one is kind of nice.” he says.

“I agree. It’s cherry though.” says Lacey.

“You don’t want to smell like a fruit?!” he says laughing.

“No!! Isn’t that weird!?!” says Lacey.

“I agree!” he says.

Worried about the prospect of discussing reincarnation she decides to end the conversation.

Whatta Man by Salt-N-Peppa plays.

“Why are they mocking my soul?!” asks Lacey. “That’s disgusting.”

“I agree!” says the African leaving the conversation.

The song plays.

“I hate this song too.” says Lem, embarrassed and disgraced.

“I don’t care. I still love you.” says Lacey sadly.

Louis recalculates his situation.

“You’re an ignorant bitch!” says a whore to Lacey. She’s a singer who’s black and sang in the 1990’s.

“Why do you hate Africans?” asks Lacey.

“She’s like a sexy mommy!” says Kenneth Copeland about Lacey. He’s a white trash fool who sucked Satan’s cock to get rich? Lacey is not a sexy mommy.

“I’m a closeted, Satanic, New Age lesbian.” says Joyce Myers. “I used to think God could heal me…but I’m still queer. So…after giving-up on God…I gave-up on God.”

“Why!?” asks Lord Snotgrass. “Do you know if this is real and it very well could be because it seems as though telepathy could be something being hidden by the CIA that’s an actual psychic, scientific phenomenon. I can see why Lacey wants you to just blow her up if this is the level of stupidity, people have. And I mean explode with a bomb, her and her family. I would feel like that too after a while if I was worried about what the rest of my life or my children’s lives or my grandchildren’s lives are going to be like because you people are totally psychotic! You’re psychotic.”

“I didn’t think God…existed after the Illuminati found me. They could explain away every miracle I ever saw.” says Joyce Myers.

Lord Snotgrass is shocked.

Beware Of The Boys by Panjabi MC plays.

“More like beware the girls.” says JP Kennedy in regard to Lacey.

“Joyce came onto her.” says an adult female sex slave.

“Yes. And she didn’t take no for an answer so I’m still having to tell her no.” says Lacey. “Because I find women entirely sexless and repulsive in that way. I’m not attracted to them.”

“I’ve been schooled that that’s impossible.” says Joyce Myers.

“That’s idiotic!!” yells Lacey.

“Who ‘schooled’ you?!” asks Lord Snotgrass.

“The Illuminati.” says Joyce Myers.

“I LOVE JOYCE MYERS!!” yells Mr. Blue, joyfully.

“They’re…not Christians.” says Lord Snotgrass.

“I couldn’t find anymore excuses to believe in Jesus.” says Joyce Myers.

“That’s possibly eternal Hell! …I’m AGHAST by how you just totally disregarded your faith!” says Lord Snotgrass, concerned.

“I just couldn’t keep believing.” says Joyce.

“That’s not…sane. Or you’re wrong.” says Lord Snotgrass.

Holiday House by Beach House plays.

“I used to wonder Joyce if you were just arrogant. Now I worry you’re a reptilian freak.” says Cherilyn Nelson of John Piper’s church.

“I agree, Cherilyn.” says Lord Snotgrass.

“I would be careful of her. I don’t think she’s a witch, but it’s weird that she understands African witchcraft. Be careful.” says a black man in Africa about Lacey.

“So…you are too conceited to admit you lied.” says Lord Snotgrass to Joyce Myers. “You’re a psychic now?”

“Possibly.” says Jennifer Aniston.

“So you’re a New Age psychic instead of admitting you were an intellectual fraud.” says Lord Snotgrass to Joyce Myers.

“We are brave!” says an 1800’s African warrior. He laughs…gleeful over Christ’s victory on the cross over evil.

I’m Sending You Away by M83 plays.

“See! That man was a real Christian. If he existed…or a man like him exists. That’s real Christianity, Joyce.” says Lord Snotgrass.

“Why did you choose your ego over Christ?!” asks a JP Morgan. “Did you?! Or not?? …Because if you did…you could…suffer.”

“I’m sorry. If the Illuminati contacts almost every truly famous person to control them…at least nowadays…I am disgusted.” says John Piper.

“Joyce you HATE Lacey?” asks Jennie Jerome.

“Yes!” spits Joyce. “She’s a liar! And a lesbian fraud.”

“So you’re a malignant narcissist, Joyce?” asks Jennie.

“Yes!” says Mr. Cologne 76. He’s being brave.

“I’ll pray for you.” Lacey says to him.

“Oops.” says Mel Pantell.

“You almost married my father.” says Lacey. “Or am I illegitimate?”

“Yeah.” she says in response.

Reta smiles.

“I would see through you.” says Mel to Lacey, lovingly.

“My father who raised me said that you had dreams of the two of you going off to Africa.” says Lacey.

“See if I just did that to try to help her it was effective to some degree and that’s the kind of stuff that I used to do all the time in prayer meetings and what scares me is that I can still do it. How do I-how am I doing that if I’m not a Christian? What is that? And that’s part of what I get caught on.” says Joyce Myers.

“The same way that Mel had visions Joyce. Jim is a totally abusive dysfunctional man. He would’ve abused Lacey and her mother in a terrible way and it would’ve broken Mel because her father was not as bad as Jim and it would’ve been heartbreaking, but Mel got psychic visions of Jim and her going off to Africa. To be missionaries. I may have been there when she had them. It’s very disturbing, the Catholics have an interesting explanation for it it’s called Purgatory. At least that’s the explanation that we found so far…I’m talking through Lacey. How is she even doing that? It scares her and in the opposite way that it scares you.” says Benjamin Yusef of Bethany College.

Al Franken laughs.

“Joyce I have a feeling there were people in the Illuminati in Great Britain. Who are Christians. How do you account for that?” asks Dr. Thorsten Moritz.

Skin & Bones by Cage The Elephant plays.

“See the problem Joyce is that if there’s Purgatory, it’s far more easy then you might think to be ‘all good’ in your mind than you really are. Maybe you given a vision from a demon or a human or to hear things that you maybe are or were not supposed to hear because Purgatory is possibly here on Earth leading to Heaven. And that’s not quite the right way to explain it maybe…but the idea is that some humans while they’re alive, have a somewhat Purgatorial experience and then, when they die, they could still be in that same realm.

It sounds like New Age, but it might not be and all that high frequency vibration stuff is real potentially, but it doesn’t work, because the cure is Christ, and the sickness is sin, and so you can temporarily raise your frequency, but God is the only one that can really lift you up potentially past a certain point. And in death, you discover your vulnerability, and you realize at the whole time you were incredibly vulnerable. Heaven is Heaven and Hell is Hell and there are some humans who are closer to Hell than they’re supposed to be.

So people can get confused. It’s a human weakness?

If your ability to help people has lead you away from Christ, it may not be entirely from God. It’s possible that Satan has used that ability to fool you. I’m surprised no one has ever told you this. It makes me suspicious that there’s something wrong with your brain Joyce and you’re a psychopath and if you are we know that and God knows that.” says F. Scott Fitzgerald.

“There is a black New Age man in the occult of the Illuminati not entirely by choice. It doesn’t bother me because I don’t see the problem if Catholics want to go to Purgatory that’s between them and God, let them work that out. Maybe it’s good for-maybe they like taking things more slowly? Umm…why do they have to go straight to Heaven? Or there’s no Heaven at all?” asks a cradle Catholic trying to reason with Joyce.

“The problem is Joyce you didn’t let them finish the conversation and that’s a red flag. I highly suspect that there are demons that enabled you to fool people because they knew you’d be effective. What scares me is that there are eternal repercussions for your soul. You and I have had many theological arguments over the years, but sadly based on the current state of your Christianity if you truly are not a Christian, you’ve lost every argument potentially or have you? Because it certainly seems like you’ve lost every argument with yourself, so why would you win? Why would I lose? I think you really need to reevaluate what why you are so convinced that there’s no God. Or what do you think now?” asks John Piper.

Al Franken laughs.

“I am hopeful in a way that there’s still God but the truth is I am definitely bisexual and it’s very hard for me to move beyond that as it is a Christian because I don’t see the theological basis for it and I just think how is that possible that God could’ve allowed that or how is that possible that I could be that if it’s Christianity if it’s real. And honestly if I am just a bullshitter…no that’s why I was so vulnerable to it. It could be what’s wrong with me but whether I am a psychopath or not I can see why people might wonder… And as to whether they have a right to wonder or not, I don’t want to comment.” says Joyce.

“I refuse to say if this dictionary. It might be thesaurus. Right Ben?” says Lacey to Benjamin Franklin.

“Yuppies!” he says.

“Yes! That’s who hates me!” says Lacey.

“You think I’m a yuppie?” asks Jan Hertel.

“Yes!” says Lem. “But…you knew Tom Ford was loud. How?”

He smiles. “I heard it. In Zurich! Or…I have very good taste.”

“I know. They still think I’m attracted to men.” jokes Lem.

“I’m not going to be surprised if you’re not. I’m tired of men being so backward.” says Jan. He thinks. “Where are you on the Kinsey Scale?”

“I’m a 17.5.” jokes Lem at his own expense. “That was a straight joke. I’m entirely straight.”

Jan laughs. “I’m sorry. Not…I’m not. That’s good. I’m fairly straight. But…but…I got into homosexuality and can’t imagine easily transitioning out of it at my age.” says Jan.

“I was mostly straight. Just a bit to the gay of Lem.” says Michael.

Jan laughs. “Gosh…that must have been weird to do!” says Jan to Lem.

Lem almost cries. “It was…disgusting.”

“Yeah. See Michael and I can only partially understand. Or is that true?” Jan asks Michael.

“I can understand now! …I would have struggled while I was alive.” says Michael.

“You were just the tiniest bit homosexual?!” asks Jan.

“I was. …Possibly. I am a ghost on a blog. …Maybe…I would have gotten confused.” says Michael. “Like…some living people do today who are closeted bisexuals pretending to be gay.” says Michael.

“How many people are like that?!?” asks Jan.

“A lot!” says Michael. “It’s possibly part of the reason why everyone wants to assume Lacey is not straight and that Lem isn’t either because they look different than a lot of people who are slightly bisexual who are alive today.”

“Do you think that people are intimidated by us? Why do they harass us because you and I and them are men and as I’m sitting here talking to you in my spirit I am wondering why why are they doing this because I don’t think we have a problem. I think it’s their problem and then what is it?” says Jan.

“Well we’re being nice and you’re being nice too. I really I think that’s all there is to it. I think some people are well bred to understand that things have to be analyzed and understood not just throwing up in the air pick and choose see what lands, I mean. I’m sorry I can’t make a conspiracy. I think it’s really just sadly down to breeding, it’s it’s pathetic it’s obviously pathetic.

You’re either a liar and a fraud or if you’re sincere like Lem and I then hopefully you too can see him how vile what you did to Lacey was. You abandoned her. She would’ve been far more careful if it wasn’t for you. She thought she had you on her side, and for all she knows you stabbed her in the back because you were a competitive narcissistic asshole to her. …Do you wanna play tough? You don’t want me to patronize you? Then there you go.

You used her friendship.

Her family is far more elite than yours and you lie about that or you did. And really at the end of the day all she wanted from you was just friendship. If you couldn’t love her she just wanted your friendship. Sincerely she’s that deep and she liked you that much as a person and that’s what I would say to you as a man. Do you still count yourself as one of us or not?” says Michael.

“No I’ll tell you the truth. I really wasn’t just after madness. That wasn’t what was happening…and I felt like she was above me socially. It’s possible I feel like she was entirely socially above me…and so I reacted poorly to that because it irritated me. And what really irritates me is that if she’s not this evil-hearted person. I don’t think she’s been understood. I did suggest Coach to insult her, but not entirely.” says Jan.

“Well, why did you suggest Coach?!” asks Chris.

“I suggested Goyard as well.” says Jan.

“Did you suggest Coach because she was looking at Louis Vuitton monogram?” asks Michael.

“Well…that’s not preposterous no. But I can’t rule it out.” says Jan.

A beautiful French friend eyes Jan. Intimidated by her he becomes shy.

He smiles.

“I’d like to meet her in Paris. Maybe if we can’t meet here in this life then I hope we meet in the next or in death. I’m interested in this woman just for a date. It might be fun.” says Jan.

“I bet that woman is like genuinely really beautiful too isn’t she?!” asks Casi.

“Yes, she’s gorgeous; she’s an usually gorgeous woman.” says Michael.

“Why can’t you protect her from Chris?” asks Casi.

“I think you know Chris better than I do why did you lie about the fact that you’re poor because you are you’re poor you know what a muse is Lacey and I am trips her up is that you seem to be kind of a yuppie even though you’re poor how did that happen you might be an unusual person to just like Lacey and I don’t know why that’s never occurred to you that your unusual and so she in different ways socioeconomically speaking.” says Michael.

“If I am Mel Pantell’s father, I’m a very tough person and she’s not dying until God says so. And I mean Lacey. I’m sick of being bullied and so is she.” says Mel’s father.

And right at that Lacey’s son screams in pain.

“I’m either a demon and I caused it or I’m dead and I knew that was about to happen and I’m serious. I’m sick and tired of being bullied. I don’t care who your little shithead works for you don’t know who I am…you really don’t and trust me if you did, you’d be even stupider.” says Mel’s father to Mr. Blue’s employer.

“Do you know Mr. Blue I think you have a very violent attachment to the idea that Lacey is poor. I don’t know how that started entirely and I’m looking into it.

I’m wondering if you have been channeling me and you somehow started talking to her long long before she even realized it…like when she was still living in Saint Paul. And that’s the thing God does order the universe Joyce, and so it’s possible that he somehow is stuck on the same frequency so to speak as Lacey. And so for her talking to people supernaturally he could’ve gotten her connected to him and that was probably very dangerous. He’s not her false flame, he is-it’s more like a catastrophe waiting to happen which is what’s happened.” says Michael.

“Where did you stay when you got married?” asks Nancy.

“Those rooms are so cheap! It was not that much. It was like $100 or $80 a night or something but it was a huge suite in the nicest hotel. …Well it was probably the nicest in 2010 no 2011 but it didn’t cost that much. It was only $100 a night, but they also got married in August so in August in Las Vegas it was $100 a night but it was a very large suite in the nicest hotel in 2011. MGM something but it was the nicer one. Well whatever. It was nicer when they were in 2011.” days Lem.

“What was it like then?” asks Nancy.

“It was the highest ranked hotel on TripAdvisor in 2011. It was lovely! Las Vegas was hot but dry. Very beautiful!” says Lacey

“You liked Las Vegas?” asks Nancy.

“It was hot but dry.” says Lacey. “Not as hot as it is now though.”

Nancy laughs. “Did you actually see much of Las Vegas?”

“We went on a quick walk at night once. And we were in the heart of Las Vegas and we ate at lovely restaurants. But other than that I didn’t see much.” says Lacey.

“Well you didn’t see me.” she says.

“You sound insane.” says Lacey.

“Where would you stay now?” asks Nancy

“Honestly, I just took a quick look and I wouldn’t even bother. It looks like they updated it. Se stayed at the MGM Grand in a suite I think it was the Grand. It was the nicest MGM I think there are two and our room really wasn’t that much but it was probably right before they remodeled it. It looks like they remodeled it, so if they remodeled it then yeah it looked very similar but it’s been updated.

I actually liked it better before. It looked a lot more like The Four Seasons looks now. But of course that was 10 years ago so it wasn’t as dated 10 years ago. It felt very fresh and new 10 years ago…but now they remodeled it. It was 10 years ago. It was over 10 years ago.

I don’t think I’d probably stay in Las Vegas, again. I’m sorry I just wouldn’t, because it’s just it’s too expensive and it’s not worth it. I really don’t actually like Las Vegas all that much.

My father had a lot of our business connections there when it was very much still just Las Vegas and not as much of a resort town and I have the sense that I would’ve liked it better then because it was more like the Wild West. I think I would’ve thought that was kind of cool.

I don’t know I’m just I’m not, I’m not a huge fan of that that area in that way and I think you probably are…and then you pretend not to be to try to seem like me but you’re so obvious Nancy.

But…it’s not that nobody in my family likes that style. I have cousins that like that modern look. Nancy I don’t but there are people in my family who do…and that’s one of the reasons why you were so obviously a peasant and are in some ways still. Nancy you’re middle class, but the same time you were obviously a peasant as a middle aged adult because you were imitating me and you had no fucking clue what was actually popular in the upper class. I do know I do know what old money looks like to some degree and you can’t imitate it…because it’s a psychological experience. It’s it’s not just something you can pretend to be and America has never understood that.” says Lacey.

“What is their style?” asks Nancy.

“Not wildly dissimilar from yours. You just are trying to look rich and they actually are.” says Lacey.

“Do they still dress somewhat like you??” asks Nancy.

“Yes! But its extremely subtle.” says Lacey

“Well, what is it?” asks Nancy.

“It’s your mentality.” says Lacey. “When you grow-up that way, when you grow up in old money you see everything differently and so the way that you can purchase things is determined by that and so if you wanted to seem old money Nancy or even upper middle class you should’ve been buying Tata Harper not Charlotte Tilbury in 2014. Does that make sense? You should’ve been really into rose quartz in like 2017. Right now is not the time to buy Loro Piana, unless if you have a sense of humor. I am honestly your Louis Vuitton handbag would’ve been really nice to have had right now. You should have washed it in the washing machine. I saw that I was checking to see what was going on with you because I have to for safety reasons and you startled me with that one I could believe you actually did that when the world made you think that would work?” says Lacey.

“Do I didn’t influence your interest in emeralds? You really were going to buy one in London? Where on Bond Street I suppose for how much like $50,000. So why didn’t you?” asks Nancy.

“We went to London right before my father had to bail us out with a check for $25,000-“ says Lacey.

“Fuck! $25,000 that’s cheap shit! I mean I could barely afford to remodel my $4 million house with my wife was alive and we basically had to declare bankruptcy…but $25,000 isn’t that much…that’s like nothing…like she’s a peasant Nancy, for real.” says Wobbly, drinking.

“No, that is the thing. Nancy we’d been traveling for two years by that time and so we had spent hundreds of thousands of dollars traveling for two years. We started traveling in spring of 2010-actually yeah spring of 2010 and then we traveled until fall of 2012. So by that time we only had about $20,000 to $25,000 to spend on a ring and then we would’ve had to go home so we decided to stay and travel bit longer. I don’t know if we’d been more careful with how we spent our money we probably could’ve purchased an emerald for $25,000 to $50,000 but we weren’t really that careful all of the time but we really just had a very careless elegant vacation in London and all over England and in Cornwall for a month. I spent a lot of money on clothes and we rented a very nice car relatively speaking. I mean it wasn’t luxury but it was a Volvo…which is not that big of a deal but it still is a nice car when you’re just renting it you know and then no we stayed at the nicest hotels everywhere we had the greatest, best food and we spent tens of thousands of dollars, just because. And Mark did spend around $11,000 on a ring which today would be a lot more with inflation but in 2010 it was $11,000 so I suppose $50,000 I’ll be right back-“. She looks up an inflation calculator. “So that’s $70,000.00. Not $50,000.00.”

“Nancy, you could try desperately to be Lacey for the rest of eternity and it will never work because that’s not who I created you to be.” says God?

“But you could you have purchased, you you could’ve purchased a ring for how much then? I could’ve purchased a ring for $25,000. In 2010 we spent probably about $100,000 to about $60,000 on the vacation which today is about $84,000.00.” says Lacey.

“So you mean you could have a ring worth hundreds of thousands of dollars right now?!” asks Nancy.

“Yes, I could.” says Lacey.

“Yeah, I don’t think people in the perfume community realize that you when you say, ‘I could be a millionaire.’ that you actually mean it like net. I get it it’s old money and so we don’t understand but I think to everyone in the perfume community it’s confusing because we’re used to new money as you know and you probably know this but it’s-that’s why you wrote your post isn’t it-because you’re just like, ‘This is such idiocy you guys don’t get it!’ I am almost positive. I am not the one who wrote that comment about the ring in that that post about the rings and actually when I think back to it, it irritates me too because I like to think that at some point I could afford a $10,000 emerald or a $10,000 ring and I don’t want someone accusing me of having the same ring that I had before for $300, it is aggravating it really is.” says Nancy.

“Yeah, it’s extremely aggravating, but aggravates you about it?” asks Lacey.

“Because if I get to buy a ring for $60,000 someday to try to compete with you in my mind or just to try to live a fantasy life slightly I don’t want someone saying to me that looks like a you know $10 $15,000 ring like yours…because I’m better than you. See…I was nice to you but the truth is…I am a demon that possesses her because she does witchcraft, and I hate you.” says a demon.

Lacey laughs.

“God how is this demon being allowed to attack me so vociferously? That seems a bit insane. How is she allowing this demon to do this? This is insane.” says Lacey.

“It isn’t just witchcraft you’re right, Lacey.” says Lem.

“She’s part of our coven Lacey she’s in the Illuminati.” says Erin.

“I would be really surprised if that was true and if it’s not you sound like you’ve been watching too many soap operas.

You know it’s sad Nancy that if you read my blog and you actually have a demon that possesses you or works with you it’s it is a demon that hates you. You’re not being smart getting into witchcraft. You spent tens of thousands of dollars in Pennsylvania trying to be me Nancy and the CIA and FBI know about you of this blog is based on reality. And if I was you, I would be a heck of a lot more careful because they’re either gonna use you to hurt me and then possibly destroy the world if they’re stupid or they’re going to feel sorry for you and keep a very close eye on you so that you don’t seem like you’re being used and cause problems.

Can you afford a $70,000 ring? What do you have saved for retirement? Probably almost nothing and then you’re spending $80,000 to $70,000 to try to impress people. You could get an impressive ring for $25,000 or $30,000 even you don’t need to spend $70,000 to compete with me in your mind. Nancy, that’s insane. Listen the only way Nancy you’ll ever compete with with me is if you manage to buy a $30 million state, Nancy, in California if you actually want to win any sort of financial argument with my cousin, not with me. No….you’ll never be as beautiful as me, you’ll never be as kind or as well-bred or anything as anyone in my family Nancy, you can’t compete you’ve already lost. There was no competition with anyone in the perfume community and you get up to that point and then you don’t want to see it, so if you’re living a fantasy life you’re delusional to think that you’ll ever be our equivalent possibly in anyway. Can you you pretend to be a movie star? Yes. But can you pretend to be Nesheim old money? Oh heck no! Could you pretend to be a Banks? Yeah…you could but it would never work because you’re not that wealthy. Nancy you never will be most likely. I mean you could try to find a billionaire to marry but then you still don’t have the breeding that I would’ve had and this is what irritates me.

I doubt I actually want to be mean, but people keep competing with me and it’s a real competition it’s not just narcissistic delusion to think that if it means something. It does mean something. It is reality and I win. So by competing with someone who has already won you’re just acting like the Devil himself and it doesn’t make any sense and all you’re gonna do is just ride yourself into the ground and possibly to Hell. You’re not getting anything out of it.” says Lacey.

“I watched you and felt sorry for you Nancy.” says Casi.

“We were pulling for Casi and Nancy to win something somehow.” says an angry man in Scotland.

“You can be Scottish now?!” asks a Scot.

“That’s funny!” says the angry man in Scotland.

“I’m not even going to bother.” says the Scotsman.

“You don’t represent us.” says an Englishman.

“You little snake. You pretended to be her friend.” says Jan to the angry man in Scotland.

“I did. She seems British. And I’m hateful.” he says.

“So so you’re delusional too?” asks Lem.

“Yes…yes I’m very pretentious and a I don’t think I realized how dangerous that was with someone like her. I maybe know that with people here in the UK but I didn’t realize that someone in America could be a problem too, like you.” he says.

“We are British genetically, regardless.” says Lem.

Later.

“Did you have an affair with him?” asks Nancy.

“Umm honestly, it’s complicated. Short answer is no.” says Lacey.

“What happened?” asks Jan.

“He was very very flirtatious with many women, and I know there were at least two, I think two women other than me who started developing feelings for him, and took his friendliness the wrong way. One of them I think thought he was inviting her to his house at one point and then he offered for her to come stay with him and his wife and she looked in my mind, I think she was shellshocked, I think she was actually gob smacked by that. And then there were at least me and one other woman and I’m sure Casi too who took his friendliness the wrong way.

I was in a rotten marriage that was dead. At that point that was after I actually had an affair with Jan.

But my marriage was basically over at that point and so I told my husband, ‘I am having an affair!’ and his reaction was, ‘I don’t like that!’ and that was about it. We’re still legally married but no the marriage it probably ended around the time that I started falling in love with Jan. And then Jan-it just didn’t work out with him. It just didn’t work out and then our friendship didn’t work out either. I tried to be his friend. I don’t know if he was up to that or not but the friendship just didn’t work out.

And when that fizzled out then I, for some reason, had the impression that a gentleman who’s in Scotland may have had a bad marriage himself. But he did not have bad marriage seemingly it seems more like he had a complicated marriage and I don’t know why he was so so flirtatious but no that ended very quickly. My sense that he was available ended very quickly.” says Lacey.

“Did he take you for a ride or something?” says Jan.

“That’s literally what I just said.” says Lacey.

“Well what did he do?” asks Lem.

“He-we had a conversation. I mean I thought there was sort of a rapport between us and then we had a conversation privately in direct messages but he was off to some Greek resort with his wife and I thought, ‘Well this is getting weird!’ because he possibly sent me a picture of himself, his face just his face at that point. But I thought what does this even mean to this man? I thought, ‘I don’t even know what’s going on.’ I can’t tell if he’s flirting with me or if he is you know a mean person…or if they’re in an open marriage…or if he has no idea what’s going on, and in which case I’ll leave it at that because if he has no idea what’s going on then that’s not good news because then it’s very unlikely that anything other than just random conversation is happening for no particular reason…and I thought, ‘No, I think I let this one go.’ Because ummm yeah it just it just didn’t seem wise. He just seemed too happy with his wife. You know it’s like why why would you ever you know even bother someone even if they have a somewhat bad marriage you know just let it go it’s not worth it. His happiness with his wife without him making some, you know meaningful moves to indicate no, ‘I’m in a bad marriage. The coast is clear!’ so to speak. And it just didn’t make any sense…so I just let it go.” says Lacey. “The thing is, I almost think it was for the best either way because it’s the same thing. I think it just worked out well. But I did try being his friend and I don’t know if he really thought of me as a friend. I don’t know if he even thought of me as a friend. But I get the sense that there are other people who let’s just say I think he found more attractive, even if I am unusually beautiful. There were other women who I think he maybe would’ve rather had an affair with if he was looking to have an affair.” says Lacey.

“I think most gay men think that Lem was secretly in love with them and not Jack.” says Lem. “There’s an asshole gay man right now we’re talking to who needs to stop embarrassing himself. I’m not in love with you. Lacey is not a fucking prick idiot so just go away.”

“Maybe so, but I thought I did have an affair with you.” says the angry man in Scotland.

“Like an emotional, vague, unspoken affair, or like something that actually happened that you acknowledged to me?” asks Lacey.

“I may have lied about what happened and said that we had an affair that was open to both of us but for the record that’s nonsense. You’re right. Neither of us had one with each other. I probably knew you were interested in me, but I had bigger fresh fish to fry so like you said, there are other people I was interested in or it was just my wife, but it’s possible that I wasn’t honest. At least that’s clearly what someone’s telling you about me whether it’s true or not about me…and do you believe it? Umm..not completely and since I’m not a ghost yet (?) you don’t entirely know where am I-I’m probably not probably not a ghost?” he says.

“Let me guess you had an affair with Shalimar?” asks Lacey.

“I know who you mean our beautiful, blonde, young lady, actress friend, possibly it could’ve been someone else too and or no one at all. That is not a dumb assumption. Yeah, she really did bully you with that?” he says.

“You know you both did you both did you both really wanted her to be hurt by it. I’m a ghost and she didn’t remember, but I watched and you were both so pushy and petty with it for years. I think you both thought that she was madly in love with you, and that somehow, she was going to be devastatingly jealous of your little Shalimar friend and she wasn’t. She didn’t know what was going on, but she wished the best for both of you, now let’s see what she would’ve said if I hadn’t interrupted.” says Mel’s dad.

“I I am I am lost I I I mean it’s it was sort of mean it was sort of mean the way that you guys sort of rubbed it in my face…that was that was mean. I don’t-It was mean, you’re very mean.

I was an fascinated by the two of you though, because I feel like there was something that happened there that if you did have an affair was incredibly covert. You’re both such a liars. …I mean you pretended to be happily married so convincingly and I was totally thrown off for the most part and then there she is and she is ‘I have a happy marriage’ in her bio right before she’s having affair with you? …If you even had one.

She was, ‘I’m happily married and then two months later she’s having an affair with you. I mean these are the reasons that I lost it on Instagram because I just I cannot imagine being that convoluted in that way and at the very least I just I don’t understand it but anyway.” says Lacey.

“I know what I am mad about. I am mad that a flight attendant’s daughter from the 1980’s who is hotter than me he might’ve been I don’t know married to an 80 something year old historical figure like Al Capone but old money and had her child raised by a pretty Norwegian, British aristocrat, landed oil money, family with a knighted author. I was in Playboy and married a sports star! I was a famous actress. How am I not better than you?!” she asks sincerely in a huff.

“I’m going to ignore that because it explains itself.” says Thomas Banks.

“I think they had an affair. I I think they had an affair.” says Mr. Blue.

“Why is that?” asks Lacey.

“Well, I’m telling you that and I’m claiming that. I can hear them talking to each other telepathically and the CIA knows telepathy for safety reasons for to protect the US. We know it because we’re the Illuminati. Honestly I think they had an affair to bother you.” says the FBI.

“‘To bother me?!’ Are you the Director of the FBI and you’re not a pedophile but you’re involved in the pedophile rings because you can’t keep your hands clean?” says the CIA.

“I’m not directly involved, but no I’ve found things that are concerning to me about my own organization, and it is very sad.” says the FBI. “I would bet that your hands are actually dirtier than mine in some regards, and yet not in others.”

“I am your top man! Wobbly! …Just so you know, by using a demon to control her hand I’ve got her fingernail bleeding slightly and ideally we’ll kill her soon. I am on the case trying to suffocate her!! So!! Cool!” says Wobbly.

“I’m sorry what was your name?” asks the FBI.

“Bobby Kennedy II.” says Wobbly.

“Is that Bobby, the son of Bobby Junior, or who’s son are you?“ asks Paul Wellstone.

“I am the son of the Bobby Kennedy famously shot in the Ambassador Hotel in 1968 Bobby Hickey. His brother was the slain murdered JFK shot on Saturday, November 22, 1963 so that’s who I am.” says Wobbly.

“So is your father Bobby Hickey or Bobby Kennedy?” asks a Real Housewife.

“No it’s Bobby Kennedy who is shot June 5 and the evening of June 5 at the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles.” says Bobby IX.

“Our numbers look the same!” says Pope Pius XI.

“I don’t think they say everything backwards in the Illuminati.” explains Mary Rockefeller.

“No my father was not shut-up then but that’s it no actually no he was. I’m sorry I was playing the role. …I know my father was shot at the Investor Hotel luncheon 6, no he was. He died on June 6th. He was shot on the fifth.” says Eobbly.

“So you’re Bobby, Kennedy, Junior and your father was shot at the Ambassador Hotel on June 5th, 1968, correct?” asks the Real Housewife.

“I want to hear about his uncle Joe, who is blown-up over a European country.” says Joe Kennedy Jr..

“So I mean, yeah, I had an uncle who was killed at war while he was fighting for the United States in the RAF. He was a very skilled and heroic man, and yet he did die in a very tragic, what was supposed to be important victory for the Allies. Turns out there was nothing there. There was no bomb even there …but but the bomb that he was supposed to use to get rid of the other bombs…blew him up…and that’s why he died and it’s that’s that’s how he died.” says Wobbly.

“Would you have known that if you hadn’t been talking to Lacey for the last seven years or not?” asks Joe Kennedy Jr..

“Not necessarily, it’s possible we weren’t supposed to talk about him almost at all.” says Wobbly.

“Yeah, I know…but I’m not sure that was the right decision. I think you guys needed to know which number to use for people’s names.” says Joe Jr..

“Anyway back to the people having the affair. What makes you think they were having one are-oh that’s right you heard they’re you heard their chatter so to speak yeah I’m still processing that it’s disturbing.” says Lacey