In Bobby’s World

In a world dominated by the United States of America the Kennedy Family who have often been called “America’s Royal Family” Bobby Kennedy Jr. is one of the most powerful and influential and dangerous overlords to exist.

Stay by Rihanna plays.

But you don’t see it. Because Joe Kennedy Sr. who fucked Lacey in her bathtub…rigged it up so you’d not notice.

“I did. I’m still trying to get over her.” says Joe Kennedy Sr..

See…Lacey’s father is Thomas Banks. And it’s possible he helped Joe Sr. rise to power. Genuinely.

“Yeah.” says Louis. “This is bad guys.”

But in 2016 Bobby Kennedy Jr. determined Lacey wasn’t possibly his aunt. He decided that was impossible or highly unlikely. Why? Just because. …He likely has reasons but he makes his reasons meaningless because to him that’s a smart idea.

Stay by Rihanna plays.

“But what if kids being held hostage…suffer?” says a hostage business owner.

“Or what if we move to Edina?” asks the leader. “And decide to not help ourselves but be evil?”

“Keep trying. Go ahead. EVIL HAS LIMITS. …And…God doesn’t save us through our works alone.” says Thomas Banks. “Of course, it’s our hearts that matter. And evil has limits.”

“We’re lying about that. In the US.” say’s Hollywood.

“Oh! You LOVED that lie.” says Lacey. “And it’s an exhausting one.”

“Nah. Bitch my hoe!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr. about Lacey.

“How?!?” asks a lucrative child hostage ring, in tired desperation.

“I don’t think it’s fair.” he says.

“What’s not fair?” asks Russia.

“Lem! It’s not even that Lem is a faggot it’s that…he’s…a faggot.” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“Can I give you another toy?” asks the child hostage ring leader, foolishly.

“I love that you’re desperately trying to get my autograph!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr.. He’s being sincere.

“Whatchu you do for the Hudson River?” asks the man’s business associate.

“I’m not talking about that. Look it up!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr. smugly.

“You think you’re better than everyone.” says the man’s business associate.

“Yes! DUH!” says Bobby Kennedy. He’s being completely sincere.

Stay by Rihanna plays.

“Are you really serious dude?” asks the man.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. thinks. “We took Lem hostage to gain power. And yes. It worked. …I’m the biggest deal on the entire globe. Because America works.”

“Okay. So…you’re holding the whole world hostage?” asks all child hostage rings worldwide.

“Yes.” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“So why don’t we just Jill you?” asks the CIA.

“Because I’m scary to kill.” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“And you’re scared of Lacey? Why?” asks the CIA.

“Why?!? Because no reason.” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“I know why.” say the Rockefellers.

“Because you controlled Lacey’s sex life her whole life. And you worry you don’t understand what that actually did and means.” says other Rockefellers.

“Can you let her be with Michael?” ask the Gettys.

“No. Because I’m a dangerous man.” says Max. “Lem can’t handle me.”

“Yup.” says Harold Loeb.

“You don’t even know if I exist.” says Max.

Stay by Rihanna plays.

“We’ve discussed this she’s with me.” says Lem.

“Lem why didn’t you just kill him?” asks Bobby Kennedy Sr. sincerely.

The song plays.

“See…Lacey and I would have worried.” says Bobby. “And we’d have wondered if he needed to be put in a safe place. Lem possibly wondered too. But Jack is oblivious and self-focused and Joe is too chicken.”

“What would you have done with him?” asks Ethel.

“Drilled a hole in his brain.” says Bobby.

Lacey laughs. “Is that what happened to Rose Marie?” asks Lacey.

A moment later.

“You’re right.” says Ethel.

“About what?” asks Lacey, confused.

Bobby nods his head at Lacey. “Look. This is why is doesn’t work.” says Lacey.

“America?!” says Ray Craft.

“Yes!” says Lacey.

“The power dynamics in my family?!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“Pat what would you have done with Bobby Kennedy Jr.” says Max.

“Max was your family in the Kid Cann Gang?” asks Dick Van Dyke.

Kid Cann laughs.

“We might as well have been?” says Max. “People are complex.”

Pat Wilson thinks.

“Umm…why is he a problem?” asks Pat Wilson.

“Umm…lots.” says President Joe Biden. “There are lots of reasons, Pat.”

“Okay. Pat. …You’re going to let my brother away-get away with stuff?” asks Joe Kennedy I..

“He’s my friend.” says Pat. “He’s the reason I married his uncle.”

“Your friend?!” asks Chris Hayes.

“Yeah. He’s my nephew.” says Pat innocently.

“Okay. So we decided Pat Wilson was Bobby’s aunt to snub Lacey in 2017. But…in reality…we didn’t even have a clue?” asks the CIA. “And because we’re all dealing with an actual afterlife…because this is the actual Illuminati…we now have an actual huge mess.”

“Is Max just Lem?” asks the FBI.

“It’s unclear.” says the CIA.

They all stare at Lacey like it’s her fault and she has to fix it.

Pat looks hurt, angry and confused.

“What’s wrong with Bobby?” asks Pat Wilson.

Stayin’ Alive by Bee Gees plays.

“Good song!” says Pat Wilson dancing prettily with Joe. She has a hearty, sexy deep voice but with a posh sounding Australian accent. And amidst her silliness and possible personality disorder tendencies she…adores Joe Kennedy Jr.. And he eats it up and gets very high.

They cut the rug. Uninterested in them they have been having regular normal sex and have a healthy relationship. She’s cold and distant and he isn’t faithful but…they’re happy. And it’s an improvement on his parent’s marriage.

“Okay. What next?” says Lacey, bored.

The music plays.

“Are Lacey and Pat Wilson like Edith Beale?” asks the CIA.

“Yes.” says Lem. “In a way. Joe had a type.”

Both Pat Wilson and Lacey are mildly offended.

“I think I’m the type.” says Pat Wilson.

“I agree.” says Lacey. “Yes. That’s far more accurate.”

Edith Beale shrugs. “I think we’re all originals. But Lacey and I are more easily categorized together with Pat as her type.”

“You’re lucky to have missed the 1970’s.” says Lacey to Max. “Eww!”

Night Fever by Bee Gees plays.

“Why?” asks Max.

“It’s annoying.” says Lacey.

“Yeah.” he actually agrees.

Elvis plays.

“No! Don’t.” says Lacey.

“See! I thought you’d love Max!” says Pat Wilson snobbishly and obnoxiously to Lacey. “He’s more your speed.”

“But I love Lem. And I resent your interference in this case.” says Lacey. She begins losing patience.

“I took her virginity, Pat.” Max tries to explain. “And she’s devastated Lem didn’t do it.”

“Lacey isn’t a man!” yells Lem. “SHIT! Joe…she’s not one of yours at all.”

M79 by Vampire Weekend plays.

“She looks like us.” says Edith.

“Not really.” says Max. “Shit, Americans are a problem today.”

The song plays.

“Lem! Process her memories!” says Max. “And stop fixing them to make you feel better.”

“But they’re mostly memories of her fucking you.” says Lem.

“Yeah! Exactly!” says Max.

“How much do you love me?” asks Lacey.

“Lem…I’ve been following her around for over ten years.” says Max.

“Yeah. Okay.” says Lem.

“He’s been possessing my husband for over ten years. I can sense it.” says Lacey.

“When?” asks Lem.

Later.

“Fuck you, America!!” yells Lem.

The Swan by Saint-Saëns plays.

Nocturnes (2) For Piano by Chopin plays.

“Almost every time she’s had sex with her husband and it’s been good…it was Max.” says Lem. “Literally…almost every single time.”

“How did George Soros know to get along with Max? Or pretend to. He knew Max was a big deal.” says Lacey, impressed.

“So, we’re done.” says King George V. to America.

“Yes. We’re done.” says Queen Victoria to America.

“I’m finished.” says Edward VIII. to America.

“King Egbert smiles. …I knew with Ebert. The math teacher in the 8th grade. She got an A!” he says.

“Yes. That was a rejection of the US.” says King of Wessex, Aethelwulf.

All kings up to King William I, The Conqueror agree to rejecting the US. Then, “I don’t regard them at all.” he says about the U.S..

Edward II decides to weigh in for those after William I and before him. “Golly. America is cute.” he says. He giggles. “Lem. Let my life…be a sad lesson to you. Up the ass…is undesirable for fellows like us. Also, be wary of getting into fights with Christians in Scotland. …All that being said, goodbye sweet America. I shall miss your beautiful company…you are my special friend.

Knives Out by Radiohead plays.

Ever since the rule of John Fitzgerald Kennedy I have been running your country in relation to the rest of the world. That’s what you get for delving into the afterlife the way you doin the Illuminati. If Lem was straight…Jack’s glory in his gorgeous American family…created a hole. And I climbed through it by force. …And through my leadership…you’ve fought all wars since. Rather, with my hand guiding you…you’ve fought all wars since.

So. Vietnam.” he clears his throat. “Umm…that problem with Reagan in…North Korea? No. Iran. …Let’s see…”. He stumbles backward. “Oh dear. No. I had help with the Gulf Wars from the Bush family. Umm…I tried to win in Afghanistan but I had to give up and go home. The Ottoman Empire were pests!” he says.

“Oh! We’re wondering if you were gay?” ask American gay men aside from Anderson Cooper.

“No. I wasn’t. That was the point.” says Edward II. “Don’t bother. I might have been fascinated by anal sex. I’m far more complicated than you think.” he says. “I was not like you. But don’t worry. You won!”

Henry VIII laughs at America. “She shouldn’t have been beheaded but…wouldn’t that have been kinder? Goodbye America!” he says on behalf of all before and after to some degree.

Bloody Mary laughs. “You fools!!” she yells at the US.

James I and VI of Scotland says, “Stop having her flake out and talk to me. I’m not God. …There is God of the Bible and that is your problem. …I don’t think you understand. She’s not supposed to be talking to us. But…we are. And…now it’s too late. Isn’t it. Huh…if only you’d known Lem was heterosexual. Darn. Say…mind if we take back the US in the next 40 years. Completely and permanently? Lem was straight, Bobby. You’ve ruined America.”

Weird Fishes/ Arpeggi by Radiohead plays as Bobby Kennedy Jr. struts his stuff like an idiotic, conceited jackass. He’s short. Mildly attractive and yet also mildly disgusting. He repulses Lacey. Literally his life makes her want to vomit. Poor thing. This beat his obnoxious short guy beat though. It’s the beat of a slob.

Jack Kennedy walks like him.

George I laughs. “I can’t think what to say on behalf of all those before me. Golly. Sorry, America. This toast is on behalf of a cool-kid who wishes you well. Rock on!” he says drinking and laughing. “It’s South Sea Bubble not Bobble, you were intuiting, dear gay men.

George III looks sad. “Disregard dear George I. He’s being facetious. Sorry. Goodbye America.”

George IV smiles. “I liked you. You had a good beat. I’m in mourning.”

Victoria smiles. “Hello again, America.” she says. “You’re all mine if you love Christ.” She thinks. “Through God. Listen…it’s okay. We’ll call it an expert experience and experiment. Good show!”

“Are they like Canada now?” asks Justin.

“I’m their only friend.” says Elizabeth II.

“Gee Elizabeth, I am going to steal your friend Lacey’s soulmate for eternity, and molest, and rape the man…that everyone thinks…he was in love with me and obsessed with me not the other way around. And then I’m gonna give you a picture of my face in a sterling silver frame. That’s right Elizabeth for one time and one time only my signed autograph is placed in sterling silver frame. It’s a collectible! So you can look at my face anytime you want.” says JFK winking. “Philip will think that is just for official business. But you and I know that it is in the right place at the right time magic can happen. Listen, no one will know because it’s in a sterling silver frame. Wasn’t that thoughtful of me?” says JFK.

“Jack.” says Queen Elizabeth II. “Why, lover, didn’t you make a gold cast of your cock like was requested, formally?”

“I don’t know. I was too busy.” says JFK.

“How do I masturbate with a sharp silver frame?” asks Elizabeth.

“Gee, Elizabeth…I didn’t understand.” says JFK sincerely. He cries in embarrassment.

“Dear idiot. See…we got bored with silver frames from you. You sent them every week.” says Prince Philip. “Starting in your teens.”

“I only sent them every once and while at most!” says JFK.

“Really? Aren’t we just joking?” asks Elizabeth.

“They’re a collection of…lovely frames really. But…we thought we’d help you a bit!” says Prince Philip suddenly cheerfully. “Why not…just send…your cock!??” he says brightly. “It’s much more to the point.” says Prince Philip kindly.

“The photo of you…in a silver frame?!?” scoffs Lacey. “That’s repulsive!!!”

“Yes. It’s like you’re too invested in your ego to realize that you suck shit to us.” says Prince Philip to JFK. “Why do we want your photo? To masturbate to? Why? What makes you think we’d want that? It’s an insult to us both on a very deep level.”

“And then he puts it in a silver frame?! How stupid. It’s pretentious and patronizing both.” says Lacey.

“Yes. We may have literally thought so too.” say Prince Philip.

“Jack! Why not just send a genuine 14k solid gold reproduction of your cock? It’s far more humble.” says Princess Margaret.

“Sorry, Jack.” say Queen Elizabeth II.

“So you weren’t jealous of them?!?” many living people who watched and produced The Crown ask.

“No. They were OBNOXIOUS. …We had some fun in the 1930’s. But…by then…they were impossible to get along with.” says Prince Philip.

“They being the Kennedy family?” asks the press.

“Who else could I possibly mean?! Yes!!” yells Prince Philip.

Later.

“So Lem…you really were feeling what in this photo?” asks West Elm.

“I hated him. You’d never know it by looking at my smile.” says Lem, succinctly.

“What?!?” asks West Elm.

Kennedys cry.

“Yes. I always secretly hated him.” says Lem.

“How much did this hurt him?” asks West Elm.

“He was in pain.” says Lem. “But as long as I kept smiling with the Kennedys I was fine. They were stupid.”

More later.