Pontico

Are used to hold Nelson Rockefeller‘s hand and weed skip through the meadow and smoke pot. Just kidding that is not at all what happened but I think if I told you guys that you’d believe that in an instant.

And to tell you the truth, if you’re secretly loyal to Lacey and you want to keep her in your crowd, you probably should tell people that because I don’t think she knows that necessarily and that’s not safe for you or for me. I think that’s where you got a realize that there are lots of people like Lacey if she’s not with you feel free to disagree. If she’s not with you, then you gotta understand that there’s another woman who will love Harold far more than she can.

And there’s nothing I said that there’s something wrong with her wrong with Harold it’s just that eternity is eternity. You have to spend eternity with us person so even if they’re soulmates, it’s maybe not they could love each other for eternity of God, Craft, that way and a necessity because they’re soulmates, but That’s probably not the way he designed it and so we can’t really violate that you know? And actually it’s despicable that they didn’t get to enjoy that part of their interaction in a more normal healthy way, which is what Harold was trying to talk about the other day when he said he was castrated it’s actually very weird that she was born as late as she was if she’s Tom’s biological daughter, if she could’ve been crafted and be the basically same person there’s something very disturbing about the fact that she was born in 1983.

The truth is the sun also rises would’ve been a depressing book but there would’ve been a happy ending for people who lived in after the holocaust or possibly even before the holocaust because the idea would’ve been yeah, he got his heart broken but then you know 10 15,20 years later, he marries this hot young woman who he’s madly in love with and she’s in love with him and they’re happy for the rest of his life so that there would’ve been a sort of context that would’ve provided people some help he would’ve been writing a memoir in the 60s or 50s he would’ve been you know enjoying life and people would’ve known that and they may even have commented on it and historical discussions of the book and of him.

The thing is though they might not have stayed together after death and this is where it gets so messy doesn’t it because I was alive would we never have met maybe so doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t have been with her for eternity or is it possible as we decided recently that they would have had a very happy union that would’ve cheered him up. I’m sorry if that’s crass but that’s possibly just reality so he would’ve had a very good healthy relationship with her that would’ve lasted for 1520 years, and it would’ve ended with him sort of realizing that he was still in love with Brad Ashley, even though even though Lacey was so beautiful and better than the better than Brett, he would’ve possibly be had to be far more honest about what what was really going on in his head that he was in his memoir, and he may have written a novel or two about it that were actually really good novels to be blunt and I’m having to say that because Scott’s insisting on it, he may have written an an an excellent groundbreaking, romantic difficult novel in the 60s About him and Brett Ashley that would’ve been the answer to the sun also rises and it’s sad that we didn’t get to read it. I think Lacey‘s been trying to help him write it for probably over a year and they’ve just never gotten around to it because she feels for him. She really does. She really doesn’t love him And so it’s like well. What happened? What really happened then Harold because I kind of know you and I don’t think you are that shallow of a person so far out your heart. Let’s figure out what really happened with her. Why does this but why can’t you get over her but we’ve never been able to get to that conversation. We’ve never been able to deal with it because it’s just things are so toxic and it’s sad.

And frankly, that’s where Lacey Hass to let go if she’s Dutch old money from New York. Her father may have been very close to some Jewish people. One of them might’ve actually been George Gershwin and Ira Gershwin and it’s very hard for them to let go because they were the Jews, possibly really cheer them up when Thomas sad his best friends who cheered him up the most in America were Jewish and it’s hard for them to let go because it’s New York and it means something to them because they’re Dutch old money they’re from New York. They started ems new Amsterdam seemingly so if that’s where the relatives are from that’s where their ancestors are from and then you know there’s a Gershwin‘s in the 1920s because that’s how her father is that’s when he was born, so to speak he was born in 1894 and he was a bootlegger that’s her father so don’t forget that so no in the 20s in New York is best friends were Jewish or is cousin of his closest friends who would cheer him up the most when he was really sad I don’t know some heartbreak or something maybe thinking about his dad mom and no it wasn’t sexual they were just very good friends people just understand that so no it’s hard for them to let go and just let Harold and the Jews tell his story because they just want to help write him But that’s where it’s like they have to sort of like oh maybe have a little bit of the glory because it’s not theirs and they know that they do they know that but there’s just he. He was very close to these people and it wasn’t sexual so it’s just like he wants to tell the story, he wants to tell the story of what happened not Ira he wants to tell the story but it’s Iris story and that’s real people are like that so Lacey and her father have to sit on their hands and bite their tongues and just let them tell it because it terrifies them that they’re going to botched the story Because it’s so meaningful it’s like dammit you’re not gonna screw the story up here old you’re not gonna screw up the story because you’re screwed up in your memoir so part of it is an ego thing where they don’t want to let go of the glory, and that’s her father not Lacey for the most part yeah that’s her father not Lacey who wants to know how to hang onto the glory of the story or something but they’re also worried that they’re going to botched the story so sorry about that.

Call think that’s what you have to understand is the context of Lem’s and Lacey Lacey is very feminine but she has a very dominant personality and so does her dad. But they’re very loving people. They’re very loyal and are very protective. Their extreme extraordinarily protective so they’re dumb and their dominating people but they’re also extremely protective. I am so keep that in mind. That’s also part of their fear that they’re not controlling so much is dominant I would say, but they’re also afraid that something bad is gonna happen if they let go.

I know the Jews understand that part of their personality, possibly, which is why they end up being so close.

Call the Mesa context of her relationship with One, even though even though she am even though she’s dominant, she’s a woman she’s feminine and lamb is able to sort of and her dominance completely, and just take over entirely take over in a way that astound people today no he just completely takes her over. It’s like instant and it’s not something that most people are capable of but he can do it with her. It’s just now he just instantly takes over that’s the end of story And you would think that of him you would think that of like he would think he would be that impossible his own way but that’s where his their British and nachos and they’re sorry if I confused you and that’s why I would love is also them and somewhat unique, and she submits to him because he really is able to be the man in the relationship They’re perfectly suited for each other.

Oh, but that’s the context of loves personality when you’re trying to analyze whether not, he was homosexual. If you even care, he, he hast to be understood as being secretly, very complicated and difficult as a man his surface is not who he is it’s part of who he is, it’s a representation, but it’s not what’s really there he it’s like an iceberg. He’s an iceberg. You see the very tip of who he is and that’s not who he really is the majority who he is underneath the water, so the majority of who he is is under the water not above and was under the water it’s like it’s like the titanic exhibit it’s deadly if he’s not your iceberg, his treacherous, very treacherous.” says a Ritter.

“ I am not a jerk, but I did possibly help kill Jack.” says Lem.

“ I think he did kill Jack I am I’m worried he actually literally was the one that fired the shot because he wanted to or they made him to keep him quiet but I don’t know.” says a woman in the CIA.

“ that might not be the case but I can see why she think that I am so I just told me to come out her to get her to see that I’m straight but I’m not gonna do that. Um, you people are nuts who are advising that I’m sorry.

Call what happened was that I was cold I was a cold fish. I never put out in a way that Jack wanted. Because I couldn’t even though I was acting gay I wasn’t really gay and I jack never could cognitively figure out what was happening. He was a pervert, but he also was incredibly stupid. It didn’t seem like it at times he seem very smart and incredibly smart at times but he was actually very stupid man in many ways.

He would hold my hand and stroke it, and he didn’t realize because he was so sexually naïve and arrogant that that wasn’t really what he wanted. I know he didn’t want oral sex either from me. He wanted to have me know hard-core real gay sex him but he was a fraud. He was a bully like a lot of narcissist can be, not all of them, but there is a number of them that are. So on the one hand, he was a predator on the other hand. He had no fucking clue what he was doing when it came to what he really want it and he wasn’t a pedophile he was just insane. There was some sanity to what he was doing, but it made no sense how he went about it even if it’s not allowed in heaven, it’s more saying that hurting a child and I could never give him what he wanted.

He wanted actual sex. He wanted real sex with me not just me humoring him and patronizing him sexually and then being totally distant in my head and frankly in my body and not really even enjoying it at all you know I didn’t enjoy it at all and then it would be devastating to him, but he would refuse to believe it, even as he talk to me on the phone and a recording that is public. If you’re smart enough and perceptive enough, you can hear it. I am totally an asked him from beginning to end I’m eating on the phone I just like what the fuck you know you’re the president who gives a shit to talk on the phone and tell you that I am stuck somewhere and I explain myself I mean I was an asked him in that conversation. I am very charming but it’s totally superficial and he doesn’t even know that he thinks it’s real. He thinks that I am in love with him just madly in love with him he might’ve been in love with that perception of things, but that doesn’t mean that that’s actually what he was experiencing or that was it all reality I was not in love with him, and so that was his perception. His perception that I was that I was just madly in love with him and he never could let go of that perception. It was a profound illusion for him. He still has it possibly and that might be why he’s in hell because he really it’s just he’s he’s in capable, potentially a letting go of that he is in capable of letting go of the perception that I was in love with him and really believing it he wants to believe it it’s you. He sent himself over a cliff into hell practically, it his determination to believe that it’s sad on a human level. It’s tragic, but God knows how to sort through it, but now he was not capable of handling the situation like an adult people that might say.

So he would get stuck to him he would get stuck in that mindset and it would affect him when it start to burst it and that’s part of what did the whole thing of him going psychotic was about like in hotel room sometimes I didn’t really want to do Sorel socks, so I didn’t want him to touch me in the morning and I would roll over and get out of bed very sharply and go eat breakfast and he would lose his mind because we hadn’t had sex the night before we didn’t have sex in the morning and the oral sex that I had given him the day before, wasn’t satisfying to him anymore so I gave him oral sex gotten him off enough and then the next day he would realize that he just wanted to really have sex with me but but it was never gonna work you know, and I just would avoid him and I was devastating to him because he would realize just a tiny bit that I just wasn’t in love with him and I’d get up and I’d eat my breakfast and he would be upset and start using drugs and then I will take his clothes off and run around the hotel stuff like that that may not be literally what happened but it’s probably pretty close. If not literally what happened and then I have to chase him down. How did we never have sex because I didn’t want to have it and he was too naïve and inexperienced to realize if that was a problem and closeted him he didn’t know how to ask for what he really wanted an appropriate way or if he ever did, and I would say no and instead of just letting go of me, he kept thinking that eventually it would work out so to speak.

No, I didn’t want to wake up alone that’s a lie at the Kennedys orchestrated and some jack ass way to cover for. What happened I hated sleeping next to Jack. I hated it and he didn’t wanna except that and neither do that I will I will. I would love to have someone in bed next to me at times I did with boyfriends, but it never worked out very well because I was straight as I would always be creeped out by it and then I would just get up once they started touching me. I’d be like no I’m not interested you know I’ve got to go about my day I am and I didn’t have all I didn’t have any long-term relationships for a reason, but it still was a lie that I didn’t wanna wake up early I wanted to wake up alone. No that’s not it all what happened.

So no, I would try to do my best to satisfy him, but I hated it and then I would just avoid him as best as I could and there’s times where it’s like he could’ve said are you in love with me we could’ve had some deep conversation, and it never happened, because Jack never one of those kinds of conversations, which is something else has been misrepresented. I would try to say Jack you’re gay, not like we’re gay together and we’re love but more like Jack you’re gay and you’re in love with me, but he never wanted to talk about it.

Oh, and then I would try to have the conversation, but he never wanted to talk about it, so I never came to place in my head in myself where I would realize that I wasn’t in love with him either right I kind of knew that, but it took some time Off and sounds like Jack you’re in love with me and then Jack’s like no that’s stupid fuck you and then I would just lose it and it was like I say something like why do we keep avoiding this it would be more like why aren’t you honest with me about who you are, or something along those lines I know and then eventually if that’s probably part of the reason you never one of the conversation is because if if it if he if he said oh yeah, I know fine I wanna be with you I might’ve said to him at some point, but I don’t know that I really want to be with you And then I might’ve left and never seen him again or at least I would’ve tried to. It’s possible that stuff like that actually did happen in conversation but maybe never quite that bitingly clear you know where it’s really obvious that I’m just totally disinterested we may may may be to have never had that kind of an open conversation so he was able to live in this delusion that I was in love with him.

The problem is, it’s hard for some people to believe what I’m saying is true and Lacey doesn’t know that she’s very tender hearted.” says Lem.

“ I here’s the problem I am Nelson Rockefeller saying this and you need to understand that this could really just be true unfortunately and I don’t care what someone says other than her exact words. I kicked Jack out of my house in the 1950s. And I told him to never come back, and Lem almost killed himself that night. because he was triggered by watching Jack use him to try to molest my son, Michael. And it gets even deeper because Michael was slightly bisexual and Jack knew that somehow instantly about this 12 1314 year old boy because Jack was a sexual predator. He was a child molester. That’s what we’ve been lying about Jack molested, teenage boys and girls not young children hopefully Right but young teenagers he like to molest them 12 13,14-year-old kids and he picked up the idea by talking with Lem. it was a way of actually trying to molest Lem’s and throw in Lem’s‘s face the fact that lame loved him. He believed and loved him and so he try to sadistically torture them and some it was stupid as fuck, but it made sense to jack at the time he thought. Oh, lame loves me, even though he’s straight, which is not possible but that’s what Jack somewhat thought subconsciously and so he thought he was going to be really evil and clever and molest teenagers around the age that Lem was molested by the priest. And so he picked people at the age that they were at because it was supposed to be symbolic to Lem’s of what he experienced with the priest.

And that was a way of trying to torture them it didn’t arouse them. It was a way of harassing and sadistically torturing them and sort of saying to Lem, ‘I don’t love you but you love me and you can’t stop.‘. Oh and no lame wood language just sort of try to be understanding and think he was imagining things or something and that was very dangerous at to Jack’s safety after a while, because love almost killed himself. This whole bullshit about how lame wanted to kill himself after Jack died, is starting to destroy humanity. It really has gone that far because of what you people done to Lacey, and in the context of that, your insistence on your bullshit with the Jack and Lem thing is literally destructive to humanity

Yeah, I know I was asked to run by the Democratic Party at the time to waste Joe’s money in the primary. And I readily went with it I readily went along with it because I couldn’t stand that fake it and it wasn’t that I hated homosexuals necessarily although I don’t know it was that I couldn’t stand Jack. He was a favorite in the absolute sense of the word, he was a Nager. He was a fag, and he was a disgusting man and I have a damn right to say that you bitches he tried to molest my son and my own fucking house get a fucking clue.

Call that’s why this country is totally dysfunctional just because I’m the wealthiest man in America doesn’t mean that you get to rape my fucking son in my living room. It’s like what the hell the jack was why was he trying to molest Michael was it on behalf of Ireland Rockefellers were German I’m sorry we look too British to him. It’s just dumb as fuck.

So there comes Jack I know he was sensually molested, Michael he didn’t OK. It wasn’t quite that bad, but it almost was that bad and love knew that I was mortified because of who his family used to be in society, so because of who they used to be in society when that happened, and because of how miserable his life was, he thought about killing himself at night when they left, and Landon Jack didn’t know that Jack kind of understood that long was suicidal that night, but he didn’t really understand and the people who did remixed there were some people who were on Jack side and lied about it and probably still do if they’re alive or still would if they’re alive and then there were some people who were on the side of the Rockefellers and a lot of other people who couldn’t stand the Kennedys and saw them as dirty criminals. I could use the Roosevelts to edge their way in and start World War II.

Oh, so they thought you know fuck that let’s talk to them and start working with them because we can’t stand jack and they did it what it was that night or the night after that or a few nights after that um, they are they are they got him they got no they got love involved in their conspiracy to murder JFK eventually if they needed to if they needed to, so there was an underground conspiracy to murder Jack that was sub text Julie supposed to be in madman from the beginning of a serious. I’m not sure if it made it in or not, but it was supposed to be there to help people, understand history, and I’m not sure if it was included or not

And the idea though is that they’re lousy, and they’re traders and you can’t trust them, because no love tried jerking his hand away very violently very violently from from earth and I’m tried jerking him to away from him very violently. Yeah, I think I said that right and it was short it was people had him holding his hand for hours last night. We told Lacey this and that’s not what happened and he held his hand in public in front of Michael for maybe it wasn’t five minutes sub asshole possibly Bobby keep saying he held his hand for five minutes in front of that and so we’re gonna make a blog post about that now mocking you, Bobby and you’ll just have to deal with it.” says Nelson Rockefeller.