A Chat With Joe Kennedy Junior

“God please restrain him. I beg you.” says Lacey to God.

“So! Why are you obsessed with me?” Lacey asks Joe.

Later.

“I’m repulsive.” says Joe.

“Okay. That makes sense. …Why did you like me?” asks Lacey. “I’m baffled!”

“Umm…your eyes?” he says.

She thinks. “But is that just beauty or something else?”

“It’s both.” he says.

“Shoot! You really do see my beauty!” says Lacey.

Joe thinks.

“What do you mean?” asks Joe.

“It’s like you see it and other people do actually see the same thing. They see it…but they don’t really see it the way that you do.” says Lacey.

He has to leave the room.

“You’re ignorant, you’re an ignorant bitch!” says Payton Manning.

“No, she’s not!” says Joe Kennedy Junior.

“Then what’s with all the jerky mannerisms because that’s so fucking white trash it makes me excited.” says Payton Manning.

“No that’s not what she’s doing. That’s not what she’s doing.

You’ve never seen an upper class British person. Who’s not a maid?

I’ll find a video for you alright. I’m sorry you’re so stupid.” says Joe Kennedy Junior

“Joe had to leave. We couldn’t find something and the best we could do was finding Zelda Fitzgerald either being channeled or very well impersonated in Midnight In Paris. Go watch it!

Lacey is jerky in the way that Zelda Fitzgerald would be if you imagined Zelda and her feminine, aristocratic southern sort of manner. She’s very ladylike, very cute by some people’s estimations, sort of being a bit jumpy, a little on edge, sort of shaking just a tiny bit? That’s what Lacey‘s like…just a tiny bit at times and actually it’s very aristocratic. She does it…and it’s not particularly common today. It is a British style of movement and Zelda is the best we could think of. Lacey and Harold are Zelda and Scott: the Loebs. …Umm…and Lacey and Zelda get along very well. If you want to get into a discussion about what it means to be white trash with them I am sure they would potentially do it, but be prepared for quite a discussion.” says Lem Billings.

“And Lacey likes to wear her hair like that times two doesn’t she!?” asks Payton Manning.

“Yes she does.

Yeah she does and I just have to kind of get used to it. Don’t I?

No…the truth is I might actually like it. I told her to cut it. She had it long for a while and I told her to cut it.

I’m sorry you don’t like my energy being sincere and straight. Do you want me to kill you? I’m bigger than you so should I kill you?” asks Lem.

“We’re going to start writing things very slowly because you people are taking fucking forever to catch up with reality.” says Harold Loeb. “So we’re going to rewrite every single paragraph if it’s not worded the way that it supposed to be without editing. And then people reading this blog can figure out if there’s a CIA and if there’s an Illuminati and if Peyton Manning just made a total ass of himself because he’s white trash and he’s not very nice and he’s kind of a dick and he’s ah…psychotically threatened by her and her family. Did you kill Matthew Nesheim?”

“No I’ll just threaten your life because I’m a football star in the Illuminati and a you’re being honorable and I’m not and I’m punching below the belt and I have no sense of honor cause I’m a shameless bitch peasant in reality with a ego problem. I can do illegal, criminal, disgusting, vile, heinous acts like a Nazi from hell and be fucking proud of myself and sadly I want to. Truth serum right now, fuck!” says Payton Manning.

“Did you kill me?” asks Matthew Nesheim.

“I’m hotter than Joe, right? I’m a football star.” says Payton Manning. He tries to grab Lacey’s boobs.

“ I answer the question

“Answer the question!” says Matthew Nesheim.

“Ahh yeah, I was part of the plan-behind the plan- plot to kill you.” says Payton Manning.

“Why!?” asks Matthew Nesheim.

“Lacey knows you from television commercials and by hearing your name otherwise she’s have no idea who you are.” says Lem laughing.

“Because you’re hot. I just wanted to kill you because you’re good-looking!” says Payton Manning.

“Yeah, no I am of thatlooking people in my family that’s true that was really a real reason

“Yeah, no I am one of the more good-looking people in my family. That’s true.

That was your real reason?” asks Matthew Nesheim.