“Fraud” by Michael Rockefeller

Brokeback Mountain is a joke. Those men are bisexual. They are not gay.

I watched it recently and it pissed me off. There’s no way an actual gay man could get aroused by a woman the way they’re represented as experiencing. That’s stupid as hell! No…they’re bisexual.

That film is a fraudulent film. It’s evil. It’s cruel. It’s a narcissistic piece of festering shit.

All that film is about in reality are two people who are really dumb. They are experiencing being in love. But instead of being together and finding some way to make it work…they lie to themselves and others. It could just as easily be about people of completely different orientations and genders. Lots of heterosexual couples experience the same exact thing. They marry other people and then later they can’t resist each other when they see each other again.

Lacey and I don’t get it. …Why the fuck are you all so fucking backward? …There’s nothing special about that film. I was practicing homosexual behavior in the early 1960’s. LOTS of people were. …And I’m not saying it was right…but why did it take so much time for a movie at all about the soap opera side of homosexuality to be made? It’s disgusting. …At least it is to Lacey and me.

What…the fuck…did you all think homosexuals were doing? Knitting sweaters? OF COURSE they had drama. Brokeback Mountain is not a revelation it’s an embarrassment.

It’s a cheesy, narcissistic joke. It’s a lie designed to hurt people. It’s evil. But…it is and was celebrated as an epic achievement because you all are so slow!?!

Is that it? You’re all slow!?

Well…Lacey and I aren’t that fucking slow. I’m sorry. …And thank God I’m not dumb enough to buy into the notion that children are possible sexual partners. That’s the new trend. It has been for a while. And yes, unfortunately, you can blame many homosexuals for that. The fact is the homosexuals as a group were on board with that idea decades and decades ago…even if men like myself and Lem disagreed. Actually lots of gay men disagreed. It wasn’t a popular opinion within the homosexual community but it was the official stance, per se. Why did we have such a profoundly evil view? Maybe homosexuality isn’t normal or sane. Maybe…we were just heartless jackasses. Maybe we were extremely desperate for support and allies and we had convoluted ways of reasoning through our own experiences. Either way it’s not something to be ignored.

Why would I have fallen in love with Lacey? Because I’m actually not a pedophile and I preferred women…even if I was technically bisexual. And I would have loved her more than anyone else I could have met. And that’s where we are. Ten million light years ahead?

Look…I’m sorry if I sound like a mean person. Maybe you’re not that stupid and evil. But I’m exasperated this morning.

If you’re going to violently insist that homosexuality is permissible…for decades…and shove loud, colorful flags in everyone’s faces…and take over the month of June…during a global climate crisis…can you fucking try not to be backward leeches?

What is so difficult about understanding the concept of bisexuality? How did you all make it so weird? As gross and perverse as Kinsey was…he did understand it fairly well. There are degrees of orientation. The Michael you knew was mostly straight but slightly bisexual. I could have just as easily have been happy with a woman as a man if they were the right people. WHY is that such a taboo, foreign concept? And don’t tell me it’s not. I’ve done research. People in 2024 are still baffled by this idea or bothered by it or what? You find it too snobby? Too upper-class? Too old money? Too educated? Too mature?

Look…Christians worry that homosexuality isn’t allowed in Heaven for a reason. And the non-violent Christians with any sense or desire to communicate and a decent understanding of homosexuality in the Bible are worth talking to, if you can find them. Be careful. Don’t trust people too easily. But…even if they’re right and it’s not allowed in Heaven…people are still experiencing homosexual feelings that are real. And it’s irrational and irresponsible to ignore that. It always has been.

…Lem was straight. Jack Kennedy was bisexual. Jack Kennedy was bisexual. …Jack Kennedy was bisexual. …John F. Kennedy was bisexual.

So…what that means…is that Jack Kennedy had sexual and romantic feelings for men and women. Frankly I think he had a tendency towards homosexuality…but he did certainly find women attractive too.

What does that mean? Jack Kennedy was…attracted to Marilyn Monroe. And Grace Kelly. And Inga Arvard. Sure! But…lacking honesty and integrity through lack of self awareness…and accountability…he may not have…appreciated heterosexual sex for what it is. So…he shit all over heterosexuality. For all of us. Not just for himself.

Lem is being accountable for the role he played in enabling Jack’s idiocy. But…regardless, Jack was…a problem.

Jack…found Lem Billings and Red Fay attractive. And Rip. And Tennessee Williams. And possibly Gore Vidal. And Francis McAdoo. But…being problematic he never took time to think about that. He never sat around and thought about why he found those men attractive. Or how attractive they even actually were to him. That’s an adult thing to do. That’s a sophisticated and mature and respectful and reasonable and responsible thing to do. That’s helpful to everyone. But he never did that. If he had…he’d have realized that there was something wrong with Lem. And he’d have fallen far more deeply in love with Red Fay.

And don’t tell me that as a narcissist he wasn’t capable of it. Narcissists are far more capable than you think. Narcissists do have a tendency towards evil and uselessness…but they can choose to be more aware and less evil. He could have just sat and thought for five minutes…just five minutes…about the men he found attractive in his life. Even in some closeted way in his own mind. But instead he chose to be a blind bat out of Hell.

You know…he could have just given five minutes of thought as to why he found Marilyn Monroe attractive. Even that would have been useful. He would have had to realize that he found…darker women with less curves…more charming. And it’s not actually a bisexual thing. No…I think Jack just…preferred a more androgynous look. …That being said…if you’re not in touch with your heterosexuality (and male gender, obviously) some women might seem too…feminine…and they do almost always appeal to healthy straight men automatically. …So Lacey, Marilyn, and lots of women who were more feminine…were hurt by Jack because he didn’t respect them for existing as themselves. He found them attractive and so since Lem and others let him have sex with anyone and in Lem’s case encouraged it…he liked them at first. They just seemed like arousing people. “Oh! How nice!” he might have stupidly mused. …But being a bumbling, narcissistic fool…he then began to hate them. Why? Because they scared him.

Lem finds feminine women attractive. That’s his type. Lacey’s very feminine. And Jack could sense that and it left him feeling incredibly skittish. And being a bumbling narcissistic fool he screamed bloody murder instead of taking five minutes to analyze the situation responsibly like an adult. …He was also anxious about his own sexual orientation and preferences. He raped and molested people and sexually assaulted his siblings…but he made excuses for it all…and kept it all on a subtextual level…so all still seemed bright and cheery and funny and fun. He was an absolute moron. But…he made it all work by using the right people. Jackie, Lem, his friends and family. He used lots of people. So…his instinct was to let feminine women die instead of accepting that he preferred Jackie’s tiny boobs. Yes! It’s that tragically petty.

See…to realize that he just preferred Jackie’s tiny boobs he’d have had to sort through his orientation and then realize that…maybe he was pansexual? Or maybe he just found a more androgynous frame more sublime. Maybe he liked curvy women…but swerved to something more non-traditional and liked a more gamine, modelesque, chiseled look in women. Which may just be his personal taste. He also used an exorbitant amount of bright colors in his paintings. Maybe he craved something…different in the way Jackie was different. Why did he have to make an ongoing national crisis out of the whole fucking thing!??

No. It’s clearly still an issue. Even long after he’s dead. How nice would it have been if America could have existed peacefully without having to babysit the Kennedys indefinitely? Because why the hell is it our job to unravel his psyche for him? …And poor Lacey and Lem. Poor me?

What happened to us before them? Back when poor people were scared of rich people. …Was that good or bad? Maybe it was somewhat bad…but…why were they scared of rich people? Was it somewhat reasonable? Was there something self-protective about it? …Because on the one hand you had to do your job…and be mannerly. All that hogwash, right? But…on the other hand…as long as you did your job…and followed the rules…you could be very subversive. A lot of trade unions were based on that invisible, impermeable wall between the front seat and back seat. And…it gave the poor an advantage of secrecy and psychological control over their own sense of self and community.

Change is change. And you have to recalibrate. But what if we don’t recalibrate? Then what? What are we left behind with? Small possible improvements and lacking resources. Because people adjust over time. So upending a whole ecosystem to alter the way one thing works…is often a dangerous process that can lead to more serious problems. And…that’s why the progressive ideal is…bullshit. Progressive views may not be absolute bullshit…but the ideal of relatively quick Heavenly improvements that work…is immature and foolish. We can and should strive to bring Earth into alignment with God’s will…but…making it all possible “in our lifetime” is absurd. That’s absurd! …We have to work. We have to be wise.

So…no…we are in shitty shape.

And on this blog…we discuss one thing. Unfortunately. We discuss the fact that Lem Billings was not gay.

You have it all wrong. Or you had it all wrong.

See…let’s say that Jackie was Lacey. And Lacey had married Jack. Or actually…come close to it. Because…no.

You have Jack as this hyper-sexual, super heterosexual guy. But the reality of him was quite different. So…while Jack Kennedy is prattling on about something to Lacey and he’s losing her interest, Lem is not running away with a mysterious air of gay ambivalence and insouciant cache from the scene, harboring a knowing look of devilish sexual glee. No. Get the fuck over it. Get…the fuck…over it.

No. What’s happening is that…Jack Kennedy has lost her. She follows Lem as he walks away from the scene with her mind. And his is more of an awkward, hurting, confused gait. Almost always. So she excuses herself and runs after Lem. Questions him about what’s going on. He smiles at her. Apologetically. It all pisses Lacey off and so she kisses Lem.

“NO!! She can’t do that!!!” yells herds of jackass gay men who loved Brokeback Mountain. “HE’S GAY!! And gay men don’t like that!!”

“So you’re policing Lem’s sex life now?!” asks JD Rockefeller.

“They have been for years now. Because they have no control over it.” says Michael.

“We barely care!” says a Millennial gay man.

“Yeah right!” says Doris Kearns Goodwin. “He scared and scares you all for good reason. Because you all knew something was amiss in regard to our view of Lem, historically.”

So Lacey as Jackie (yes this Jackie looks a bit different) begins sleeping with Lem. And they plot to send JFK off on an ice float, so to speak. None of Jack’s kids are his. Obviously. It’s a completely different story. But you’d have believed that just as fervently.

The only reason you think Lem is gay and that Brokeback Mountain is epic and pivotal and revolutionary…is because you were told to think that. Lacey tells you to think for yourself. In an edifying way.