Some Christians are quite sure I’m a demon. Other Christians think I’m a real ghost. The Christians who think Purgatory is possible are more likely to believe I might be a ghost. And they’re right. I am a ghost.
Last night I realized something. You don’t understand how foolish you’re being about me, especially in regard to reincarnation. I am Emperor Constantine or something should suggest that he’s helping me. Why would he help me? Because he understands my perspective. And he understands my story of sexual abuse as a young man and the reality that I faked being homosexual. There were many men in his day who did that. Why? Because they felt that they were gay too, even though they were not. So to him, my psychology isn’t foreign. It’s rather commonplace, so to speak. And I do look like him and he just feels bad for me, I guess. …Or I am him. I literally am him.
No. No, I wasn’t gay. No, I wasn’t. …I didn’t not come out of the closet to protect Jack Kennedy. I was uncomfortable talking about it because it was absolute bullshit…but I had these bad memories and misunderstandings of human sexual behavior that I knew meant something and I was very protective of myself. I didn’t want to get into a debate with anyone about homosexuality because I didn’t think it was safe for me. I felt morally compelled to be homosexual…but I also didn’t feel able to defend myself on some intuitive level and that left me feeling unsafe discussing it. I wish I had, but I didn’t trust people in that way. And to be honest people often let me down, so I wasn’t insane in my lack of trust.
I lived a miserable life. I’ll answer my own question. Of course I would have been happier married, and settled down and living somewhere. But I didn’t think I had that option truly. And I meant that statement in a sort of dark, biting, ironic way. How you interpret those words says more about you and your vulnerabilities as a person and your relationship with truth than how I felt. I meant them to be mean. I wasn’t being loving when I said that. I was mocking people. I was mocking people. …And if you know or knew that…I invited you to join me.
Who the fuck…really doesn’t want to be settled down and living somewhere? Married? Hmm. Fine. But I had to say that. I think. Maybe I should have left that out. But it felt necessary to say married too. Anyway…who doesn’t prefer that? Who doesn’t really prefer living? I wanted to make a statement that would fool some assholes and make other people think.
Why? I WAS STRAIGHT.
*a living gay man laughs*
I was so unhappy. My family knew that. … I was miserable. And it wasn’t because of Jack Kennedy’s death. My whole life was messed-up. People interpreted my pain differently than how it actually was. I was very misunderstood.
Look…I lived the life of a gay man…but I was straight. Of course I was bitter. And invoking my name is very dangerous because of that. That’s bad news. Bad! The Obama Presidency was possibly cursed because of the David Pitts book. And the ensuing death or near death and destruction of the DNC might be related to it too. It’s bad news.
You all don’t know. Or do you?
Here’s the thing…I feel bad for actual gay men. But…I can’t empathize with perversion and what you’ve done with my name and my legacy is perverse. I had some grace for it because I did say confusing things and I did act gay convincingly. But…I can’t stand how Lacey’s been treated. And it’s egregious to me to be sitting here with her writing this.
You’re intellectually perverse.
Kick In The Door by The Notorious B. I. G. plays.
Why do you celebrate Lacey’s misery? Do you? Do worthless men get off on her pain? Was that the idea? Sodomize me to steal my pot of gold and then throw me to be crucified by the Jews? Well. I don’t have a pot of gold. I ain’t no leprechaun, you silly bitch. And the Jews are my friends. The Kennedys were Irish. But I was not. No, I was English. We don’t have pots of gold. We have…estates. And…names. And profound rage.
You have no idea how angry I am.
I…was…heterosexual.
I was straight.
I wanted WOMEN.
You use me. You use my name to harm people. You use my very tragic psychology to harm people who trust the story that I was gay. JFK Junior was one of them. He was disoriented before he flew into the ocean. Thinking I was homosexual was totally disorientating to him. He had no idea what it meant to be a man on a certain level. He was constantly contorted inside to make sense of it all. And if he wasn’t straight…he refused to believe that. If he was bisexual it confused him and made him a very vulnerable person in his lack of self-awareness. He married a woman who was a lot like Pat Wilson but then he was told by the US Press that he has married Marilyn Monroe. *I’m laughing* He sort of believed them too. And…so…he had no idea how to handle her. A bisexual married to Pat Wilson…who thinks she’s Marilyn Monroe when she’s angry and is afraid to mortally wound her by upsetting her too much or breaking her heart.
No. And my Lacey is…also baffled.
Why? Because she has no idea what it’s like to be genuinely loved on a personal level other than as a parent or even parent figure. And I can try to love her…but…it’s extremely difficult now. You’ve all made it very difficult over the last few years. I actually don’t love her any less…but it’s difficult. Because I’m hurt. But I almost don’t have a right to be.
“But Lem!! Why would it be any different with JFK?!?” you whine. Right?
*I roll my eyes*
I’ll tell you why. It’s simple. Jack Kennedy never admitted he was even attracted to me. Not really. He never admitted he was even attracted to me. Not really. And he certainly never had any…respectful conversations with me about our relationship. He was…a rapist. And an idiotic narcissist. He assumed I wanted him all…the…time. It was…a bad marriage. But it wasn’t even a marriage at all. It was a defilement of my soul.
And you don’t want her to write that? Why? It’s sad? You know it’s probably true. Huh? But it’s so sad!? Wow!
Why is it sad? It’s not your life and you’re not me. Why the fuck do you all care SO DAMN MUCH?
I’ll tell you why. Because the middle class is in trouble. And it has been for a while. And the idea that you can read my sexual orientation based on hearsay and my faked manners and my misinterpreted words…is comforting. Because it makes popular people in history seem approachable and understandable by the common person. It feels safe. It feels happy. If David Pitts is a good historian than you can be too. You don’t need to be so…cold. Right? So intellectually dry and removed from popular consumption. You can be…normal?
But what if I was straight? Huh? What if? …Then you can assume that Red Fay meant I was bisexual and the US Press misinterpreted it intentionally? Maybe. …Maybe not. But if I was straight…then what does it actually look like to be gay? Or even bisexual? What if it is a look? What if…JFK and his son look bisexual? What if that’s what actual bisexuality looks like in reality? Are you gonna assume their wives are men now? Or what? Is that what you’re scared of? Rejecting Carolyn Kennedy? Yeah. I can see why. She was very stylish. Who wants to have that conversation in their heads who isn’t rich and conservative. Right? That she…was married to a bisexual. And her clothes? And frame? Was she non-binary? Or was she was just…masculine? Or was she chic? Or have women with strong chin lines been increasingly popularized since the 1940’s? Is it to fight more successfully in wars? Make the nation wealthier? Why? It’s not a sexy thing. But they can be sexy. But it’s not actually that sexy. It photographs well. But Zelda and Lacey are more attractive. A chin without the masculine part. They have that. But it didn’t and doesn’t photograph well.
Anyway…Lacey has no idea how much I want her. And as much as God has allowed me to interact with her…I still have limitations. I’m dead. But…I do exist.
You know what else she doesn’t understand? Why you were offended. In the perfume community. She thinks you just were delusional narcissistic fools and she burst your bubbles. Is that all it is? Am I being too hopeful? Because part of me wonders if you all also did actually feel hurt.
Why would she assume you were all narcissists? Because you LIED.
I think Casi eventually thought Lacey was poor and bisexual because she couldn’t imagine Lacey not understanding why she was offensive. But no! That’s not it at all. Lacey really didn’t get it.
Her impression was vastly different than your reality. So to her…you’re bourgeois, spoiled, happy assholes who were very full of yourselves. Especially Casi. And referencing poverty as you experienced it will make no sense to her. Or even being middle class as you experienced it. You’re truly talking past her.
“What does she think we’re experiencing?!” says a woman who collects perfume.
“You eat out. Weekly. Or every other week.
You buy $500 bottles of perfume. Every two or three months.
You have almost no debt.
You easily pay your car payments. You have no serious money problems.
You rent or own. Either way it’s a neat, cozy, well furnished space.
You buy a few new clothes every once and a while. Not that often. But with some regularity.
You eat very well. Or well enough.
You get your hair cut regularly by decent hairdressers. You use good skincare products.
You use nice dinnerware. You live nice lives.” says Lem.
“So she wasn’t at all surprised when I got married. Or by my ring. She thought my ring was crap. And I was sad.” says Casi.
“She was happy for you. It was sparkly. It was pretty. But it wasn’t…at all…impressive.” says Lem.
“But me getting married was-“ says Casi.
“Totally blasé. Expected. Dull as dirt.” says Lem.
“Yeah! And she’s right. Which is why I trust her.” says Tsar Putin.
“So…it was all very clear. She knew I was going to get married?” says Casi.
“She expected it was likely.” says Lem.
“But she’s way off about our financial situations?” says Casi.
“Yeah. Not astoundingly off. But more than just mistaken.
Look…she’s…not who you want her to be.” says Lem.
“So tell us more about who we seem like to her.” says Marsie.
“Give me a place to start.” says Lem.
“What do we eat?” asks Stephanie.
“Sushi. Fresh, homemade sushi. Carefully crafted dishes. Or perfectly stored leftovers.
Look…right now she’s reorganizing her house. And she’s happy to live where she does. But…she’s not…thinking it’s going to really impress people. To her it’s just…what it is.” says Lem.
“Yeah. I know what she means.” says one of her first cousins.
“So shopping at Scully & Scully isn’t impressive to her?” asks Nancy.
“Nancy. It’s as impressive as eating meat regularly.” says Lem. “Or being able to buy Bath & Body Works as a teenager in 1999. Every month. It’s…nice.”
“So…why is she so sheltered?” asks Casi.
“Casi! Most people are. In some way. But…why doesn’t she know at all? Because I was gay.
Because I was gay!!
Right?
No. I wasn’t. I wasn’t gay at all.
I was straight.
If Lacey had been aware I was capable of being attracted to her she’d have a vastly different view of the world. If Skippy Handelman was a real person and she’d married him…she’d have a wildly different perspective on you and poverty. But that’s not what happened.
I was a lot like Skippy. And maybe there could have been another man like that. But she never met him. And so…as it is…the world is sadder. Because Skippy was a nice person.
Peter was a nice person. But he died in 9/11. The world would be better with him here even if he’d not married her. Love really does win. But only if it’s God’s love.
I was straight. The world needed me too. The actual me. And you barely can imagine I even exist anymore.” says Lem.
“What does that have to do with her perspective on us?” asks Casi.
“ because she can’t she can’t see the world. The only thing she can see is sort of what’s right in front of her face so whatever love she’s received from people she can experience that, but she can’t experience some thing. People aren’t allowing her to comprehend if she had someone who loved her, my guess is that she’s suddenly start taking some time to sort of analyze things outside of her daily existence in a different way so it’s like my twin flame apparently doesn’t want me. Oh well I guess I’ll just start from scratch or something which is actually interesting because then who does she end up with depends on what happened if part of Lem’s’s mistake was that he was raised so well and such Puritan all the money that he no longer understood how vulnerable he was to someone like Jack, then then yeah that’s part of why she ends up with Michael or Louis or Harold Lowe because because those are not men who would’ve assumed that Jack was safe, they would’ve thought I don’t care how old money my family is these people are dangerous because there’s so many there’s a laundry list of reasons why I wouldn’t have trusted that myself, but not that I’m the best judge of character but I don’t I think a decent number of people would’ve been suspicious of Jack and his kindness and the whole family’s kindness even though they insisted that it was the other way around, I think if love was actually straight, but especially if he was innocent in anyway, and a good person and by the way for the record, I have to say that it’s glaringly obvious that he was probably bisexual. If he wasn’t straight, I would say it’s glaringly obvious, and the fact that historians have mismanaged history and rewritten history, so that he was gay is obnoxious.
I don’t know what they could’ve possibly taken from what red face said other than to me that he was bisexual that was on Wikipedia. Hopefully it’s still there. He was bisexual, or he was straight or he was may be gay but I have a feeling he was probably definitely attracted to women, and I have a tendency to think if this blog is real and if she’s not hallucinating, and I doubt that she could be hallucinating, somethings somethings are a logical and clearly there’s something going on. I don’t think it’s possible that he wasn’t straight at this point on a certain level. I don’t know historian I’m not an expert but I don’t think it’s possible if I’m being honest, it was It’s to me. It’s obvious that he was straight, he’s pointing out that he was so happy at Jack’s wedding is brilliant and that was a ghost that did that Lacey didn’t come up with that on her own. Something told her that I had a brief experience with her myself and I know she’s not someone to come up with things like that she misses stuff like that, she knew he was straight and then we brainwashed into thinking otherwise in the same way that she could tell that I was attracted to her eyes she’s not stupid, but she does miss stuff like that so I highly doubt that was her own intuition. I think that he told her that, and I know her well enough as an individual to say that I don’t think it’s likely that that was her idea.
Why is my spirit or my energy deciding to talk like this into the phone? Because I think grab a Pantell is right love I think she’s wasting time. Writing these post a list of their therapeutic for the two of you and maybe they are here and that’s great I don’t see the point because I don’t think you’re going to convince these people that she’s a good person.
I think Lacey and I are a lot alike and someways as much as it might not seem like that to some people. I think we’re a lot of like my parents have a very nice house in Germany. They seem rich. I have nice things. I was a copywriter in me and Zürich for a long time And I’m somewhat handsome and when people interact with me, they assume usually that I am well bred and him they might assume that I’m gay and they might not be but they definitely assume that I am well off that I’m kind of a spoiled rich kid. They never assume that with Lacey not really and it’s unfortunate because I, I don’t see a difference between our lives all that much to be honest I think given where they’ve chosen to live 160 to 190,000 a year or is probably for a family of 40 but equivalent to my hundred and $10,000 salary hundred and $15,000 salary in Zürich in 2014 as a single person I don’t think there’s much difference. Um also my parents gave me money but I am her parents give them money to I mean there’s not a huge difference between us and what is actually starting to piss me off if I’m reading this blog and just analyzing it why do you people relate to me like I am so far above you And then relate to Lacey like she’s a piece of shit socially because that’s part of the reason why she has no fucking clue what’s going on.
Oh, you can’t expect her to know the way that you do when it when ask yourself this question when did she ever ever live on her own?” says Jan Hertel.
“ Jan are you imaginary or are you a real person?” asks a demon.
“ I am a real person.” says Jan, smirking.
“ so why are you attracted to Lacey?” asks Suzanne.
“ because she was extremely beautiful and she were Schnell 22 and I knew what it smelled like and the thought of her wearing that being a little older than her I was in my 40s I was in my late 40s and she was in her early 30s and being a little older than her, I just thought her this young beautiful blonde woman with big brown eyes who wears Chanel 22 there’s no way that she is like most people and I was I was attracted to it.” says Jan. “ for a 30 year old woman woman of her beauty and intelligence, who seemed a normal you know not pedophilic to be wearing that it I think maybe I knew she was a bit ditzy, but not stupid and it just made sense to me and I was lonely and not entirely gay and I just thought you know, I think she has a clue what she’s doing she’s this young attractive blonde with big brown eyes wearing Chanel 22. No she has no idea what she’s doing but I have a feeling being 50 that she would definitely be interested in meeting poor than most women who are 30 and look like her, and then it’s like what does that mean? I think that means that she’s probably good and bad and that she’s probably not promiscuous but not uptight either. I have a feeling that I could probably flirt with her and get somewhere if I was so inclined, and I was so inclined and so I did.” says Jan.
“ I see you’re about the same age as Skippy Handelman?” asks an actress.
“ yes, that’s interesting that you say that yes.” says Jan.
“ and Skippy is Jewish and German and your grandfather was a high-ranking Nazi official?” says the actress.
“ yes are you trying to suggest that I was part of the inspiration for him?” says Jan.
“I think it’s eerie. I think it’s extremely unlikely that you had nothing to do with it. I don’t know how it happened but I would bet that there’s some attempts on servers parts to do something positive. I just wanted to point that out because to me, it feels like that if there’s an illuminati, and I am actually the actress that played Mallory that she’s channeling right now or someone’s channeling me she has no idea but no it’s creepy how much I am like her to be honest Terese lately and it’s creepy how much our names are like Mallory and Lacey there’s something weird Lisa Miller about those names and Skippy and lime sound similar to but then he’s Jewish and my brother is is Jack and I I just I don’t know how the whole thing works I don’t know who’s idea it was I have no idea but it’s very eerie to me. I have a very strong sense that it was someone’s idea somewhere was going to be no is that her father‘s involvement in Hollywood had something to do with it and that maybe there was an argument between a Jewish movie producer and did not see a official and they said if you really care so much about white people, then why don’t you take care of some of them now the ones who are being bullied by other white people who you didn’t, you know no were Jews cause you couldn’t tell or something like the Kennedys oh dear god that could be what it is. Yeah so it’s like Jack and his family could be secretly genetically somewhat Ashkenazi, but it’s not obvious to judge genealogists or even geneticists but when you’re dead you can see it because it’s probably all perfectly clear and so maybe there was an argument where it’s like you didn’t know who was Jewish and who wasn’t anyway but hey if you’re gonna take what you said so seriously about the Jews being evil then why don’t you go to step further and figure out who’s not Jewish but is or something like that, so Skippy Handelman still Jewish but he’s actually white and then the Kennedys are the real Jews and so then we’re gonna do now you know and maybe it was something like that where they were trying to sort of make a point and there’s not see you took it very seriously and decided to do some thing about it because no I mean I believe it’s pretty unlikely that the Jews of today are related to the Jews of ancient Israel. I don’t think it’s likely there’s not some you know genetic correlation connection but I don’t think I don’t think it’s as clear as they thought it was, and know this is fascinating to me as an intellectual.” says Mallory.
“ well and also just what if it’s not about being Jewish what if there is just evil people and it is so much genetic I think it’s interesting that Ted Bundy appeared on this blog. What does I should say as you scroll down and apparently he’s not in hell he’s in purgatory. It seems like he opted when he was dad to have some sort of brain transplant or something so he’s not himself anymore, and he was perfectly fine with it because somehow, some part of his spirit didn’t fully reject Christ, even though he was insane and evil, and so he somehow was capable of being restored in a way where he’s now able to be helpful to people which is interesting because that’s not what I would assume, but I wonder if there are some people who you’d be surprised by it’s like when they die they really are just in shock and how awful they were because they were so insane and then it’s like I was that evil oh my gosh I was nuts and then it’s like yeah so do you want you know to get the surgery to fix yourself or not And then I guess it seems like some people it’s not surgery but it probably is the best way I can have explaining it and then it’s like yeah they probably do and then some people like Jack simile. Choose not to and that’s sad because that’s not what people would’ve wanted for him even if he was evil.” says Jewish man.
“ anyway getting back to Lacey and the testing is that actually it is possibly I would just like to know why exactly it is that you people think she has a clue what it’s like to be middle class I have some idea because I worked and I lived on my own in Zürich but if I had a sister’s and she’s somehow been sort of a homebody and she married in her 20s after living at home after college I can’t imagine I truly I can’t imagine her being aware of what it means to be middle-class because if she chose to be a housewife and have two or three kids and live and let’s say Paris with her husband even in an apartment that was reasonable but fairly inexpensive because he was only making 150 thousand in Paris and they had two kids and she didn’t work in 2010 they would’ve lived well. I don’t know it would’ve been dramatically different than how Lacey lived but it would’ve been yeah about $150,000 salary to kids in Paris very little Des… She has an art history degree from some German university yeah it it’s not that dramatically different than how she was living when I met her and then let’s say that he did better and suddenly was making 200 to 250,000 in Paris and now he’s making around 300 to 340,000 in Paris and she still is a housewife I really don’t think it would be that dramatically different than how she lives now if her husband had a $340,000 salary in Paris I really don’t think it be that different they probably owned something somewhere but it would be huge, so just imagine it I mean don’t because we did have a relationship, but just imagine that she’s capable of being my sister theoretically speaking, if you’re capable of that sort of intellectual hypothesis without making it reverse if you could make her my sister yeah and she’s living somewhere in Paris. It was very similar husband actually who is making 340,000 a year and a two kids and they own some flats somewhere or something and it’s very beautiful but it’s just a flat in Paris maybe the flats worth around 1 million I don’t think it would be dramatically different than how she’s living now I really don’t, I think with those numbers the illuminati would be a little more confused because they’re a little backward when it comes to analyzing things if they exist but I jolt I think they’d be more respectful to her as dumb as that actually is but but that’s who she is I don’t understand how you people don’t grasp that but if you can what makes you think she has any idea what it’s like to be you Casi she has no fucking clue who you are if show me really makes me laugh we might have a competition about who has better China you know I like my royal Copenhagen, and she has the upmost respect for my taste, and she likes that too, but she actually prefers things are a little different like Royal crown derby maybe her father was a very old British man.
No really this isn’t. This is not is insane as you think it is so what if what if what if she was my half-sister living in in Paris with her husband and he was making 340,000 a year and they owned a condo and she became obsessed with collecting perfume for 5 to 6 years for some reason that my mother would’ve understood but I don’t entirely, am I I don’t think you guys get it. I might’ve actually cared about her somewhat but but I’m not always the best person but but still the argument stands why would she have any clue Casi how you live or who you are her days are filled with red wine that she hast to be careful, but she doesn’t drink too much of Making brisket crafting things with her kids, probably taking trips to the art museum, trying to teach them languages and expose them to the arts in nature as much as possible she is my sister will say as a housewife I don’t understand. Why are you people thought she could relate to you, when when was her experience being you I’m sorry and that isn’t it sad I think she’s a very compassionate person. She’s very loving, but she’s not you she’s a lot more like me I don’t. I don’t know how I don’t know how you people think she can relate to you
Do you know our family takes trips will say or would take trips if she was my sister I have a feeling we maybe do but I have a feeling we would’ve taken trips and probably still would. Oh, sometimes probably to the south of France we would stay in a nice place and hang out on the beach and live somewhat luxuriously for about a week and her husband would probably help pay for it occasionally, but I probably would’ve tried to and my parents would’ve probably also paid and know if we would’ve had a nice time at and that’s our life that’s just ordinary to us taking these trips, eating gourmet food. Lacey and I both like to cook or me sometimes we might even be slightly competitive about that with the sugar. I might be slightly disdainful of her practices at times when it comes to how she cooks things and then she’s probably worried that I’m not eating enough of something And buying too many Hermès scarves, no edit arm maybe that’s where we could be siblings but but let’s just say we could be theoretically how do you imagine that your vacations are impressive to her how how do you imagine that your life is impressive to her it’s not she has an all for all intents and purposes if she was my sister she would have a $60,000 ring from Bentley and scooter That’s the same quality that Kate has the princess that’s the same quality that Meghan Markle has that’s that’s the quality of their jewelry that’s the quality of her jewelry that’s what she’s owned. That’s what she would have the same ring essentially that the future queen of England may have that’s what she owned. That’s what she owns that’s who she is that’s what we have Casi that’s our level of opportunity and privilege and it’s ordinary to her. That’s how extraordinarily well off my family is, which is why you were very impressed by me in the perfume community
How the hell did you imagine? I’m sorry if this is heartbreaking that she could relate to you she can she just it’s not that she doesn’t want to relate she cat she she’s not stupid she’s very smart. She did very well in school. She would if she was my sister she did very well in school. She’s very intelligent. Her husband is very intelligent he said he’s very well rad very intelligent person in his own way, but he’s very business minded and know by the time he’s in his 50s he’ll probably be making even more money but and obviously were proud of him but we also wish that my sister was a little more happy because we don’t think that they’re probably soulmates him but that’s the that’s the thing How do you imagine that she can relate to you I think Dr. Moritz who went to Cambridge had a hard time relating to her as privileged as he is. I’m sure he has a nice house but I don’t think he thinks of himself as a wealthiest person, even if he is so wealthy, how do you imagine? How do you imagine she can relate to you how? How do you imagine she can relate to you?” says Jan.
“ I can Lem relate to us?” asks a woman.
“ oh, I don’t know I’m over late so you need to be careful because you’re sounding like you’re saying that we can’t figure out how you are existing as a human we aren’t not human we care about people. She’s at least she does very much human if you’re some poor person living somewhere especially if you’re a child don’t think she doesn’t care about you or that she doesn’t relate to you. It’s not about that it’s not like that. No I am specifically asking Casi. I don’t want to hear some middle class L advise, the person who doesn’t understand what’s going on defending Casi for the umpteenth fucking time I want an answer from these bitches like Susan and Casi and Alicia I want you to fucking answer me how you fucking thought this made sense. How the fuck did you think she could relate to you? I’m not talking to someone else I’m talking specifically to you people in the Perfume community.” says Jan.
“Ahh…dumb as dirt just dumb as dirt.” says Casi’s relative.
“ you think I’m dumb as dirt!?!” scoffs Casi.
“ OK I have dinner I have to say something I’m speaking from the afterlife. My name is Aaron I worked at travelers at the same time that Mark did her husband legally I am older than them. I am ugly as fuck compared to her I mean there’s no comparison, and I used to say stuff like that and it’s just true. I also thought it was pretty hot at the same time. Do you know why because I was slightly hot I actually was somewhat hot I am I mean compared to Lacey I am but ugly and so are you Casi but she’s an extraordinarily beautiful person, so it’s sort of absurd to compare yourself to her and people know that but then that’s my point compared to some people I was hot compared to I would say enough people I would say statistically I was pretty I was hot and so even though I was married, I had an affair with her husband and I assumed I am somewhat naïvely that he was far more invested and attracted to me than he was because he’s attractive but she’s actually way out of his league. She was way out of his league and I was doing well to be with him. I was like close to his league. I would say I was a little below him, but I was a lot closer to him than she was. She was way out of his league and I mean she was young so she still could’ve gone back to college and theoretically better lawyer this was this was a while ago now she’s 40 new be a lot harder and she’s also not physically doing as well because she fell down the stairs and almost died, but at the time and she’s anemic, but at the time at the time she was physically healthy enough she can have anything wrong with her really and I was very cruel, because I knew he was closer to my league than he was to hers and I knew because I was a little older and more experienced. I’ve been married for a while. I knew how easy it was to sort of sleep with people, and I knew how astronomically attractive she was, I mean she was breathtakingly beautiful I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone as beautiful as she was in person and that’s what she actually looks like. You have to understand that her pictures don’t do her justice. She was arguably the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen and it was natural. It wasn’t make up. It wasn’t pretense it was just her, I am dead as I’m saying this is from It’s all scary because how is this happening? Well it’s it’s the super natural, so yes I am talking to you through a wormhole in time which is why Lacey at the current moment feels like she’s levitating practically but she’s very physically used to this experience at this point in her life and so it’s not particularly overwhelming to her but I know she’s a little bit out of time as she’s writing this on her block it’s not something she’s grounded enough in the present to be able to write this, but she’s outside of time enough to be able to talk to me.
Oh yeah, science is very limited in our understanding of these things, and if there is an illuminati, it’s partially because they’ve hidden a lot of information from people and from scientists because they don’t want people to understand with the human mind is capable of.
That being said no, I was an absolute bitch to her it’s going to be able to say this I really was I was an absolute fucking bitch, but no I was I was I was I was her husbands week I was in her husband sleep well he was better looking than me, but I think he was out of my league, but not not like that much And she was way out of his league, his family I don’t understand them entirely the way they treated her. He was doing very well to be with her and they’ve made an absolute mess of the whole thing but um, they are what they are what I mean they’re wealthy by multiple standards they’re a wealthy family his family his mother was born middle-class but his father is wealthy at this point and that’s his dad so I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say his family is wealthy.
But no, she was way out of his league, and I took advantage of that because some people like Lem’s, and hold on like Herald Loeb to some degree and F Scott, Fitzgerald, and Louis, and maybe Michael to some degree and intriguingly enough Skippy Handelman Arkhip, the character would be capable of marrying someone far superior to them in terms of luxe and really everything they’re not overwhelmed by that as much it’s not scary to them because they’re so well. I was so loyal and dutiful as a person which is what Jack took it vantage of that he felt honorable enough to sort of carry that sort of honor as a man it didn’t feel shameful to him like he was with someone too hot for him or some thing was it was weird he felt special enough and romantic enough and deep enough because he was actually straight maybe even tall enough and buff enough as a person, maybe even smart enough to be able to sort of be with somebody who was way out of his league Because it’s like OK I’m not as hot as her but I am extremely smart and I’m very sensitive and I’m incredibly attracted to her and I’m digging in bath and I think I can compensate and convince her to really truly be attracted to me and he does ask if he could have two because that’s just who they were and so they could find someone who is way out of their league and takeoff their glasses and given her intelligence they be happy. They be very very happy together, because they were very deep unique people and that was exactly in my opinion what God had planned for her I think that’s I think that’s who she was supposed to be with someone who could really appreciate her, but who understood that at the end of the day she wanted them, and she just wanted to be loved And I think if they were possessive enough in the right way, no she’s there’s and I think those energy of enough to understand that one person is more than enough especially if you love them and it’s just profound beautiful thing where it’s like they want her and she wants them and nobody else and it’s so beautiful But that’s that’s not what Don Draper believed in right he thought love was fake I think because it never occurred to him that something that astounding could be real. He didn’t see it in his own life and he didn’t understand the possibilities of what human beings are capable of for good, not just for evil which is something that’s markedly, disastrously missing, and madman by the way, I was actually serve a man of a show you people never seem to understand how good things could be not just how bad they were.
I mean, the show is totally depressed and depressing. It’s just it’s like what does the show need Prozac or something? It’s just totally fucking depressing.
Anyway, I was a bitch and I I just am I knew that I was enough attractive enough where it’s like he would actually feel comfortable with me in a way that he wouldn’t with her and then Lacey I think you should stop at Casi and these people aren’t able to try to understand that they don’t get your perspective just stop sweetie they’re not there just it’s like you wanna explain it to them they want them to get it so desperately I don’t think they’re going to get it. I can vaguely understand their perspective because I’ve worked as an actuary and I kind of got how they’re thinking of things but I don’t really understand because I’ve been pretty privileged. I went old mess you know that I’ve been an actuary since I was in my 20s, I didn’t grow up wealthy but we grew up with enough so that I don’t really understand anymore cause I’m so well off at this point what it’s like to be poor and today stage I don’t know what it’s like anymore either I just don’t know and this is her people piss me off because how the fuck am I supposed to know I work 40 hours a week I you know come home I try to keep my weight down I try to be healthy I try to have a life and I don’t know anymore how to relate to them because how who do why do I interact with them and this is where they piss me off and I just have to say this it was your job, Casi to be more humble and honest it was everyone’s job on Instagram to be more humble and honest 1015 years ago it’s still is but it’s specially what especially was 1015 years ago and tell people how they were actually experiencing things and not in this way, where it’s like you’re humiliating yourself But in a way where you’re letting people understand your actual perspective because imitating somebody who has more money than you isn’t helpful people like Lacey and I don’t go on Instagram to break necessarily we were on there for other reasons and I’m barely on there anymore at all but most people who have money aren’t on there bragging And the people who did some thing like that it’s like why are they doing it? I don’t know but I don’t think it was for normal reason so to speak and so the people who were on there who were wealthy, didn’t seem like it because we weren’t in that mindset, I just saw the illuminati baffles me I don’t get it I make up a lot of money my husband works we don’t have kids how do people think of us I don’t make $1 million a year I’m not some celebrity but I am well off do you just think that I am a peasant compared to you? That’s so fucking stupid I have a good retirement I have more money that I know what to do with I want me to do with it all I’m gonna have to retire in my 60s to just spend the money that I have because I don’t have kids I mean what the fuck do you think I’m poor What’s rich to you being gross as hell and owning five houses worth $10 million each and eating shit because you’re so fucking confused and what the fuck you people are degenerate slobs do you have no fucking clue what reality is anymore.
There are some people like the Rockefellers. There are some people who have a lot of money. If Lacey‘s family were to take all of their money out of the ground if they could, they would be wealthier than the Rockefellers. I don’t think people ever realize that if they could, yeah, they did argue with the most wealthy families ever exist, and I don’t think Forbes is worth shit and someways anymore for that reason, but that being said, I mean some people have that in their family some people are that wealthy some people just are but most people who have money are more like me and that’s more normal to have two or 3 million in your savings maybe four or five and just think well I will that’s normal wealthy Having $200 million and eating poop because you’re so confused is not normal that’s sick.
And you know some people who have more than that artist confused but I’m just saying the weird new money because it is new money. I’m sorry I’m so sick of people on Instagram suddenly making new money heroic. It’s not in that way it’s in mirable I’m somewhat new money. I’ve had to work for it to some degree I had to work hard but it’s not like you’re these you know, noble you know aristocrats you know riding on horses with swords and shit I mean fucking get over yourself that’s more Lacey‘s family. Yeah, I mean really I love to see if there’s no illuminati. I would love to see one person, who’s new money, discover the illuminati and write a blog about it, maybe some people could have that she’s not new money and that’s what’s happening literally before your eyes. If you’re reading this, that’s not typical of new money. This is more something someone would do when they’re pissed off and they’re old money and they can get away with it because they have 2000 readers. They have 400 people reading their Instagram account or more but still And nobody gives a flying fuck what they think because there’s some esoteric eccentric rich person that’s how she’s getting away with us because she’s a genius and this is ours but also because it’s like SNL it’s just a parity of reality but also because even if it’s true, it’s no one cares she’s not famous But she still is doing it so if there is an illuminati, she still is being very brave and very heroic and very honorable in a way that very few people in history probably in someways ever have been that is old money. That’s what I aspire to as new money that’s what white people are capable of when they’re not worthless pieces of shit like Lacey because even if there’s being her nation in this life, she’s white And I’m proud to say that as another white person we’re not worthless shit old money is not completely this erroneous nonsense thing there is something to be said for it which is why some people moderate is why it matters to some people it’s why they care about that aesthetic And I’m just speaking on their behalf when I’m saying no some people have money like me so we bought $4 million and it’s new and they’re proud of it and who works for it and I don’t know what the hell illuminati is thinking because no I’m not like you either if you met me you wouldn’t be impressed by me either probably or if you were, do you know why you would be because I might be smarter than some of you I’m a very successful actuary and I’m not as smart as her husband necessarily but in someways I might be smarter or I don’t even know maybe I’m about equal I don’t know the point is I’m not stupid and that’s why you’d be intimidated by me so I don’t you know, I mean God bless you people, but it’s pissing me off how you don’t seem to understand if you exist. If there’s no illuminati you’re in charge by mistake to some degree it’s a mistake.
Oh, I’m not saying no ilumiNATTI is a mistake. Some of you maybe are smart I don’t know so the artist like Jay Z maybe I’m completely stupid but other than him I’m not sure how smart you people really are. Or maybe Jay Z I don’t know maybe Eminem I don’t know maybe there’s one other person like Bill Gates or Elon Musk or some thing I don’t know maybe there is like 20 people who are actually intelligent and the rest of you are just there by mistake because I don’t think you have a fucking clue what you’re doing
I know I mean it’s just it’s just silly. It’s just silly isn’t it because if there’s an afterlife I am in my I am in my late 40s well yeah I am I am old a butt so I’ll be done well maybe 30 years that you know about 30 years I’ll be dead, which really is not that long from now, so yeah, in about 30 years, I’ll probably be dead And then that’s it I mean we’re all gonna die so I don’t know what the hell the point of everyone being so mean and evil why is anymore but I’m also saying that from the other side but no I just it I don’t get it I don’t get why you attacked Lacey I don’t get why you decided to throw her down the stairs because her neck is so fucked up and her brain is a little weird and no her hair is falling out and her doctor really wasn’t that sympathetic to her the other day and it’s just it’s absolute fucking shit absolute fucking shit and I I just have to say that we’re getting back to what I was originally going to talk about.
Hey, so her husband was more in my league even though he was out of my league at the same time he was younger than me he was not married he was in better shape, but I knew how he would age possibly to some degree and I also just had a sense I mean he was he was a tractive, but he was in my league, and she was way out of our league so yeah he he he was an alcoholic when I knew him I was alcoholic too, and we used to go drinking together and then we would be involved sexually because I wanted to be involved sexually and then Lacey became his first real serious girlfriend. I mean he had one but then he hadn’t had one for a long time and then she showed up and he got so much serious about her because I mean she was incredibly attractive and I think they got along really well And I have a feeling they were also I mean she’s she’s good in bed. I don’t know that from experience but I just have to assume using my actuarial skills that she she probably would have to be and I don’t think it’s some thing that you could make her do right I think it’s just who she is as a person get over it, so basically they met and they started seriously dating and I got very hurt in the process because I was in love with him and I thought we had some thing I thought we had something special I didn’t think he probably get into a serious relationship because he was so hung up on me in my mind. He was like Carol Bob I thought he what I had to laugh because I wasn’t expecting Harrell lobes actual soulmate because they are Lacey and Harold are soulmates. I wasn’t expecting Harold lobes actual soulmate just shut up and pursue a my special friend I was I wasn’t expecting that. I read the sun also rises I gave it to him to read, but I wasn’t expecting I wasn’t expecting you know Robert Cohn’s actual soulmate to show up and mess up everything.
*she laughs*
I so I thought that this was just like a ridiculous situation, right I thought he was young and naïve and in love with me and I was like Brett, Ashley and I had this husband who was ridiculous and I was you know, sort of wild and free and adults you know But I thought he was inexperienced in unknowing and that he was probably in love with me and that was wishful thinking. It’s the same thinking that lead people to write Jack and love by David pets it’s just absolute fucking bullshit thinking but it’s not OK it’s bullshit but it’s not complete bullshit, and if Lacey knew more about statistics, she might find that fascinating but it’s not. It’s it’s hard to explain, but I intuited that I intuitive that he was in love with me based on like his body language and different things that he’d say and not say, but it was an inaccurate assumption, and I was way off I was way way off in my estimation of him, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t totally off base it was based on Some actual you know fax and intuition but I miss calculated. So I miss calculated and I thought this is not. This is not a man who is Ken capable of love. This is a man who just needs guidance or help or some thing and so I had no idea how often I was the truth is I think Mark is a very stable person now in a way that he wasn’t before because of Lacey, but I don’t think am I I don’t think I don’t think his family understood how much people like me affected him getting fired. I think they blamed Lacey because she happened to come into his life right around the time that he was fired, but it actually is me and a lot of other people that he was friends with at the time who all were encouraging him to drink. It wasn’t Lacey I mean she was never at work with him. She never step foot in his office. Once I I don’t know why they assumed that she had anything to do with that. It’s so fucking stupid but anyway, the point is I miss calculated, I totally miss calculated his interest in me but it wasn’t stupid so it’s like I miss calculated but it wasn’t stupid
Oh, and it was stupid at the same time it’s complicated I’m a complicated person anyway pointers so so basically I was very upset. I was very sad. I was very attached to him and so when she came on the scene, I was determined to get rid of her and Her and I think that’s her people. I have to be careful with one. I lived experience that one milling supposedly lived with her husband Mark on one date in particular actually was several dates because he tried to get us to be friends and I can speak from experience part of the reason why this is so irritating to Lacey and Lawrie Merz because they will he knows who he is but also she has a pretty strong sense of what he experienced and was possible, I was married I was stable and I thought he was in love with me. I really thought that Mark and I had some thing and you know even if we had an in someways Lacey I think we did slightly but I don’t think it was all that I don’t think we had. It was not that deep, and no I mean anyway so basically on more than one occasion, even though she was the pretty one and she was the girlfriend, he was far more attentive to me and he was a lot more interested in me because he felt more comfortable around me. I also think he was trying to be avoided with Lacey but I also think he felt more comfortable around me even though he’s closer to her I think he felt more comfortable around me at times and so you think that that would’ve been happy it’s me and it was. I was very happy. We would go on dates the three of us and he didn’t seem to realize that inappropriate that was or he didn’t care. I don’t know but him he would be very cheerful and talkative with me in a way that he wasn’t with her and I can’t imagine that Linn wouldn’t experience that too if I had been gay and had had my experience because I was straight and I am straight and I was actually attracted to her husband. 00 and I don’t know that my sexual encounters were that different than what he experienced with Jack, they were very one-sided. I was the one putting out and it’s because he wasn’t that into me he might not even actually been attracted to me almost at all, but I didn’t care and I was that smitten by him and no it was not a huge burden to me, because in my mind he was in love with me And him I was devastating to him a big and then that’s where Lacey is a totally different person than me, but I don’t think that lamb would be dramatically different than me. I don’t think most people are that even if he was like lazy it doesn’t change anything but the point is, I love the dates where I got the attention but the minute that the attention shifted onto her it was devastating to me. I would get very upset and that’s why when Len brings up the pictures at the wedding and how happy he was for Jackie that to me is totally irrefutable evidence. I don’t think it’s possible speaking from experience For someone to be that happy at someone’s wedding and have it be real. You can tell in his face that it’s real. He sincerely happy like some pictures when he’s happy and smiling it’s like I guess he’s happy but it’s not like he’s that happy at Jack’s wedding. He looks sincerely happy, it’s just there I’m sorry I don’t you want for me it’s in it’s in the pictures he looks that happy and I would never have been capable of that in 1 million fucking years I don’t care how reassuring Mark was to Mesa text Julie or what he said I didn’t say or what was done or not done I don’t. I don’t care if we slept together the night before the wedding And I mean it doesn’t matter the next day I would’ve been devastated it’s not possible it and it doesn’t even have pretty Laceyz. It’s just not possible it is not it it it it is not in a way it does matter because it’s a whole gay versus straight thing, but not at the same time. Am I vandalize those basically no it’s not it is not psychologically possible And I’d I couldn’t have done it either in a similar situation I could not have done it either there’s no way and actually this is work it’s interesting because if I had been gay if I had been a lesbian and I wasn’t like 100 I’m not like necessarily 100% straight but if I had really been attracted to women even more than I am, and I might not be that attracted to him but if actually, I might just be straight but anyway, the point is it’s a people are complicated but no, and if I if I had been a lesbian though, if I just been a lesbian, I don’t know that it would’ve affected me as much. It would’ve pissed me off, but I think I would’ve been a lot more plastered about it because it’s not a love that I would be capable of experiencing it’s like, I care but on a certain very practical human level how much can I actually care which is probably why I love my street it’s like how much can I actually fucking care if I’m if I’m if I’m a lesbian if I’m secretly thinking about women and Mark is like someone that I think is in love with me and I’m attracted to him but at night I go home and think about women and he knows that and thinks it’s funny I I don’t I don’t I don’t think I would’ve cared as much. I just went up here as much as I’m just not capable of caring and that way it’s like you want me to gonna make me care I mean I care but not that much and I think that’s more than what I’ve experienced because I think he was probably straight. Hello it makes sense Him but OK that was sort of appoint that I had to make that’s not my final points and yes I’m trying to take up some time because I really think she needs to stop explaining herself to these people unless if they want to start reaching out to her I just watching from the afterlife I can’t stand it anymore It’s pissing me off too much. I’m sorry.
And John him saying that you know she could be like my sister and live in Paris on a salary of 340,000 a year I mean that’s a reasonable salary in Paris it’s not a lot but 340,000 no debt and you’re frugally living and you own your own place and it’s in a nice neighborhood. No that’s a nice life, it really is 340,000 in Paris and it’s a nice job and you’re in a nice family. No that’s a pretty decent life demographers need to stop making things up.
I mean it’s not like an exorbitant amount of money but that’s why I mean that’s the whole point it’s like it’s a nice salary him but the end but forget it if you don’t understand that’s who she is woman living in Paris on 340 thousand a year from a nice family With Jan is her brother then we’ll just have to leave it at that my point though is that I don’t think you guys get how insidious things can be, and I am not being able to say what I wanted to say completely which irritates me but last night Lacey was with One and they were falling asleep together in bed And they decided to think about what would’ve happened if he’d been there and by him being there I mean if he had been raised in the Midwest or somehow ended up living in Minneapolis and then about 75 years old in 2010 or 72,72 or 75 recently widowed Having a wife who just died five years prior and if he had been sitting outside of a concert that Lacey and her husband and I attended together at the fire line café in 2010 I almost missed my bus.
Show me backtrack I was in love with Mark I was married, but I was trying to have a steady affair with him so to speak I was trying to have a stable affair and I thought there was something really going on between us and so Mark and I and Lacey went out together And we had been spending a lot of time together because it was right around the time of the state fair and so we decided to go to the state fair together but before that we were doing all this other stuff because I was in town for the week and so we were spending time together And I had spent the night at Marks apartment the night before he didn’t tell her, and I called in bed with him and tried to be sexual not like overly sexual but I just laid in bed next to him. I just laid in bed next to him and I am, he didn’t kick me out he didn’t even notice I was there until morning, and then he didn’t say anything and it was very intimate and I would say we cheated I mean it wasn’t sexual, but it was intimate and in a sense that it’s all for sexual so he had a sort of sexual intimacy with me in that moment and he was dating her at the time and I mean he cheated that we weren’t an open relationship with that point and he cheated that was cheating and so he didn’t even tell her but I knew it it happened and I was angry that he wasn’t sleeping with me I mean I was I was I was I was I was pretty much oil is a sexual instigator if not always and no I, someone assumed that was because I was married, and he felt guilty But no I mean so I was very intimate and he didn’t say anything to her and yes I was angry, that nothing more had happened to be very jealous and very bitter at the same time. I also knew that he probably wanted to be with her more than me, and that it was just a complete fuck up on my part because Yeah I just I knew that I had messed up but anyway him last night they they went to the date that he took her on with me the night after that happened and Lem’s decided to be a 72-year-old man waiting at the bus stop with us what happened is that, she was dating him. I was trying in someways to miss my bus because there was a bus between downtown Minneapolis and downtown St. Paul and if you were drunk like me and staying in a nice hotel in downtown St. Paul paid for by travelers insurance if you take a bus from Minneapolis to St Paul and that’s what I did I got on the bus between Minneapolis and St. Paul, and only thing is I miss my boss. I miss my boss with the intention of trying to stay with them again I had this fantasy I think where she’d have to go home or I would somehow stay with he would somehow sleep with me in their apartment while she was there and then I would somehow devastate her that way I had very little regard for her humanity, absolutely no respect for her humanity almost at all I mean really it’s very much like what you imagine. Linn felt with Jack because you know he had a room in the White House right? What do you think was happening? I mean your idea is that they were having sexual encounters in the same place as he was having them with Jack, Anne and Jackie with Jackie I mean him but but that’s the thing I see the difference is that there’s a lot of differences and I’m not gonna go into all of that but basically I was the one billings that you imagine existed with her actual husband so I had this fantasy of having my own room in the White House and showing her who his boss so to speak because I was there first and just like long was their first right except not really but that’s what people thought he was doing with Jack so anyway basically they visited that night last night And she went home with him. She went home with lap. He picked her up and even at 72 took her home with him and that’s why I’m talking on her blog.
What is the big difference is is that I was an actuary her husband was an actuary. There was no power and balance between us. Lem was supposed to be gay. Jack refused to admit that he was attracted to men at all. That’s one power and balance. Jack had a Normas amount of money and that’s the other thing. I really think it’s possible that he was basically holding them hostage, I don’t think Linn felt safe not kissing Jack’s ass. I don’t think he literally felt safe. I don’t think his don’t think he thought his family was safe. I don’t think he thought that it was safe to not be nice to Jack. I think Jack scared him shitless.
Add, I think he was delusional and thought that he was somehow indebted to him, and that they were somehow married. I did not have that view of things with Mark. I thought that I was somehow it was I had a very different view of things but that’s more what you imagined that Lem’s had with Jack can you get angry at them for hurting Jackie yeah But I also think he may have had reasons why he thought it made sense that we’re actually somewhat good hearted and tragic and I have a feeling that he would’ve been perfectly fine never seen Jack again to some degree if that’s what Jack had decided after he married Jackie he was happy at their wedding. I don’t think he really was upset by the prospect of Jack distancing himself and I’m having a life together without him. I don’t think that was devastating to him. I think he thought that somehow it was possible and that they maybe would even sleep together at all anymore I I don’t think it’s the same thing I don’t think people understand how off you’ve been in your analysis of him, and in a way, how perverted and narcissistic you’ve been, I think you have him in your head in this way, that you’ve sort of idealized him as gay men and I don’t blame you. Lacey is very attractive. Remember, I said she is arguably the most attractive woman I have ever seen in my entire life, and maybe there are some models or someone who is better looking than her but that’s saying something she’s extraordinarily beautiful. She’s a very unusually attractive, beautiful person when she was the I don’t well I hope she still is and she’s lost her hair and she fell down the stairs, but When she was young and healthy and herself, she was gob. Smacking me beautiful and that’s his twin flame so I mean yeah OK maybe he’s sort of unusual too. Maybe there’s something a little attractive about him and maybe maybe you know as much as he seems somewhat average maybe he’s not entirely and that’s why people think that it’s so cool that he was in love with Jack, but I think that’s definitely tampered with, and ruined your analysis of him, listen to the understanding you have with him. I don’t think you understood who he was in for info at 40 and I don’t think it’s fair to a lot of people because I’m still could be gay men like him that exists but I don’t think he’s one of them, and I think you altered our understanding of history by not realizing how Ludacris the situation actually is that you’ve invented.
I saw anyway that night I have a feeling that people were probably hitting on her or making eyes at her and she was trying to be faithful to Mark and it’s sad because he just cheated on her and no lame at 72 would have been fully capable of picking her up that night and taking her home I know it was not something even at 72 he would’ve had the skills and ability and know how to take arguably and astounding. The attractive woman who is on a date read the situation and then take her home with him. I am sure they would’ve ended up married I mean she was a hot 26 year old so at 72 he could’ve had a hot 26-year-old wife And I’m dead serious you don’t understand who that was. I mean you you know that he was capable of that which is why you think he was this love God or some thing but I don’t think you understand how creepy the whole fucking thing actually is that no he he was he could’ve totally taken her home at 72. Totally could’ve done it and if I’m dead, I actually sort of watched. I might’ve actually participated, and yeah she would have gone home with him. I don’t know how Mark would’ve really reacted to that because he would’ve seen what was happening you would’ve seen that she was going over the 70 something year-old I mean what was would’ve been attractive something 70 something especially in 2010 he would’ve been a good looking 72-year-old but no I mean, that would’ve been interesting and I just I have to say based on watching that last night. I have to say something about what I experienced.
So he, he took her home with him and let’s just start off from where I was in my state of mind right after she left lamb would have been a very wealthy man. He would’ve been able to order a car to come pick them up he would’ve offered to go get drinks with her she would’ve declined and she would’ve said let’s just, not then he would’ve said let’s just go home then let me just take you home with me and so he would’ve ordered a car to come pick them up so a Lincoln black Lincoln would’ve pulled up and she could’ve gotten into the backseat with him and left and then texted Mark saying I’m sorry I went home with someone For my own safety let’s talk tomorrow. I’d still like to be your friend. I care about you as a person. Let’s try to talk sometime soon but for my safety let’s talk tomorrow.
And I would have been trying to figure out who the fuck she went home with I would, for some reason have thought it was absolutely hilarious. I was a huge fan of how I Met your mother and so the thought of her going home with someone would have greatly abused me. I was also a big fan of Tucker Max, so I would’ve thought that it was the most hilarious thing, I would’ve just thought it was absolutely hilarious and I would’ve been laughing about it and then I would’ve been trying to figure out who it was. Mark would not have been as amused. He would’ve actually been mystified and hurt and somewhat pissed off and mostly at me and someone at himself and someone at Lacey, but I think he would’ve probably been gob smacked to say the least that he would’ve probably tried to have an attitude like he didn’t care so I would’ve been laughing about it and I would’ve been trying to figure out who she went home with and I would’ve that was it that old man and then she would’ve probably said or he probably would’ve said him I mean I don’t know who else would it be and he probably would’ve just kept repeating repeating what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck.
That and then I would’ve thought well what do I do now and I would’ve probably said let’s go get a drink and he would have been open to that possibility but he also said it probably just need to get home. I have work tomorrow I needed and I did too and so we probably would’ve just gone back to his place and something might’ve happened. Some thing might not have happened. I think I would’ve realized, though, based on how upset he was that he actually did care, and that would’ve been devastating to me I would’ve had to face the fact that she was affecting him in a way that I wasn’t, and that would’ve been devastating to me. It was devastating to me later, but I would’ve had to realize that that I really was intruding and I would’ve been devastating absolutely devastating him. I don’t know why people think again that lamb could be happy being a third wheel like that it’s really not possible to be happy being a third wheel for most people I would say nobody who’s at all capable of monogamy would probably be happy being the third wheel, because it’s just sad you know you just feel totally unloved and or even wants to be capable of monogamy. It’s just totally depressing and it would’ve been really depressing to me extremely depressing because I wouldn’t realize that I broke up the relationship because I would’ve been to her that somehow, she’d figure it out that we cheated or that something had gone through her head, and that she realized that that we That you know that she was on wanted and in someway on and that’s that’s where it’s like I really I’m just talking to you from the afterlife because it’s still hard for me to handle this conversation without being a jerk and I still have a hard time being kind to her But I am I know for a fact based on that that people who are in the Perfume community do not deserve pity because they’re assholes either I am one of them. I’ve been an asshole to her and now I at least know that that I I can’t handle I can’t handle that because I mean I was in love with her husband OK I was actually in love with her husband, we had sexual relations together of some nature I was actually in love with him. I don’t know what the fuck is so personal to them about her personal wealth. I cannot get over it that was an extremely painful period of my life I was in love with him for years. I don’t know what is so personal to them about her and her money it’s so shallow and so last night to me that they have taken it so fucking far.
Him I am I don’t get it he people are total idiots to me. I I just I don’t. I don’t get it. I’d like to be able to say it’s too bad One wasn’t there and part of me really you know to be honest this is where I have to grow up even though I’m dead if lemon could be the father of her kids and he’s actually been capable of being there and Mark could’ve been friends with her and they would’ve been fine and he would’ve been benefited by her friendship but she would’ve been married to Lem’s, I and it was actually him I I just don’t understand I’m not trying I’m not mad at his family I’m just saying, if in a different world, his parents had somehow raised in Minnesota or something but it’s just sad to me because it’s like as I think about it because yeah, if he’d been there, OK, I would’ve had to deal with the fact that Mark wasn’t in love with me and that would’ve been devastating But I have a feeling I also have to come to terms with things that I’m still coming to terms with, and I probably would be a far more happy person at this point in my existence and no I mean that yeah I I don’t know if I would’ve hooked up with him that night or not maybe I would have maybe I would have And tell you the truth if we did yeah it would’ve been eye-opening to me because that would’ve been the end of the relationship and I would’ve had to deal with that reality just that I ended it and no I mean it would’ve been devastating to have an away and I know that he’s even aware of that as I’m saying the start 2024 I don’t think he’s aware of how devastating it actually would’ve been to him which is sad She was very good to her very good to him. She was very good to her husband incredibly loving and understanding. Is she really just exhausted her resources and her patience and that’s why they’re not in a love type marriage anymore because it’s just she literally just came to the end of her rope and still wanted to be His friend and they were married and Jana actually was like why do you need to divorce him you can just stay married and it won’t disrupt your kids lives your son’s life and that’s why she still married to him that was actually Jan’s advice, and it was good advice because I don’t think there was a way for her to be happy in the way that most people are in this actually very sad because no mom wasn’t there that night I know I don’t think she would prefer a 72-year-old I don’t think she likes old man. I think she likes men of that generation because there are plenty of boomers are old now, and she is not attracted to them. She’s not, you know, just attracted to old man it’s not like that she’s attracted to men of a certain generation, and those men are all dead now for the most part and the ones that aren’t mean they’re 103 and she’s 40 and she could try to track them down but they’re 103. They’re literally close to death, and I highly doubt that it would even make sense anymore because it’s like they’re too old and just random old man I mean it doesn’t even make any sense so no on and frankly, a lot of those men might’ve even had wives who they were in love with, so it’s just it’s just sad. No, I mean she left wasn’t there that night.” says Erin.
“ OK Aaron that was not a lot of helpful information necessarily other than the fact that you pointed out that it really doesn’t make sense that that guy was anything other than straight so I’m not sure what the point of her saying all that was but is there anything anyone would like to say from the Perfume community?” says Lem.
“ and I also just wanted to verify the fact that she actually would’ve got home with you and just say that she doesn’t have some fetish for old men. She’s genuinely just that tragic of a person.” says Erin.
“ I so let me get this straight she would have mats just get a visual. What does what do they look like?” says Casi.
“Okay. Umm…she’s not that pretty.” says Casi.
“That’s not true. She’s stunningly beautiful.” says Lem.
“Yeah. Okay.” says Casi.
“I’m just as pretty!” says Marsie.
“No. We’re not. Shut-up!” says Suzanne Little.
“Yeah. I cannot emphasize enough how beautiful she actually was.” says Erin.
“Did you want to hold Jack’s hand in this photo?” asks a woman.
“No.” says Lem.
Anyway, um last chance is there anything that you ladies would like to say and you gentlemen in the Perfume committee I’m gonna try to channel you as best as I can. Is there anything that you’d like to say to Lacey?
“ why don’t you understand our perspective?” asks Casi.
Because she hasn’t lived your life, Casi. She has no experience.
“ do we understand her experience?” says Marsie.
“ I I cannot believe that it’s that different!” says Casi.
“ OK it is that different. What is it that you think she does every day?” says Lem.
“ she gets up has tea with toast and jam like a pretentious bitch and some stupid fucking tea cup that I can get out of dollar store and washes her face puts on lipstick washes the clothes washes the dishes and then just make lunch for her family and then makes dinner for her family and then cleans and dust the house?” says Casi.
“when does she write this blog?” asks Lem.
“ you know you do look straight. Your eyes you’re making like a gay face with your eyes in your lips but the rest of you looks really straight. I just have to say that as if you weren’t making your eyes look gay, which I don’t even know how men do that, but I’ve seen gay men do that before if you weren’t doing that to your eyes and I’ve seen other pictures of you where you don’t look like that your eyes look more normal so if you weren’t bugging out your eyes and probably damaging your eyes, you fucking idiot and doing something weird with your lips I actually think you look entirely straight. There’s nothing about you that looks gay other than your mouth in your eyes I just want to say that, Jack just looks gay. I don’t know it’s just his body it’s his face it’s like the shape of his face. He just looks gay. I mean either being bisexual truly believe that it’s like a look that’s like an adult anatomical thing and that like I actually look so much bisexual I’ve had people tell me that that I look bisexual and I don’t think you look bisexual or gay love. I think you look straight think you’re a handsome straight man and I think lame I think you’re straight and I think Jack looks somewhat bisexual or gay actually think Michael looks somewhat bisexual too but I don’t think you do. I think you look more straight. I just wanted to say that that actually pisses me off so he isn’t intellectual if I am what it all because, I I just I don’t understand why people can’t just admit that that some people anatomically look a certain way it’s not just a mannerism.
That being said, then that means that conversion therapy is worthless because it’s not something that is easy to qualify genetically you know that there’s not a gay gene, but I would bet that there’s a set of genes that tend to be more gay and that’s why it’s like an anatomical thing I I mean I don’t know it could also not be but to me it seems like there’s people who look gay or bisexual and I don’t know why people haven’t studied that more in a more normal way because I I am a part of it is that I conspiratorially speaking I think it’s because of stuff like you I think people would have to admit that you look straight lame, and then they have to admit that people like Jack don’t and it would be a hell of a lot harder to fool people because people like rock Hudson do look gay he does. I think Paul Newman looks bisexual mostly straight but maybe somewhat bisexual. I actually think Don Draper looks slightly bisexual just or pansexual or some thing different than most people maybe the actors straight and slightly bisexual or maybe he’s demisexual I don’t know there’s something different about him And I I don’t think that something that we’ve been very sophisticated about that. I don’t know why am going off about this right now but this is clearly something that bothers me because it’s just so irritating because it’s so if if if if if it’s allowed in heaven, and if it’s between two consenting adults, and it’s not some thing that like is wrong with us then I don’t know why we can’t just say I look like this it’s not just my mannerisms is the shape of my face it’s Not just the way I hold my fingers it’s my whole lake body I don’t know maybe we’re just not kind enough as people and people who look like they could be and then art would be bullied too much or something. I don’t know whatever the point is oh, who is the address because if people would start casting people way too much into these types of people or something so maybe it’s not safe And that being said, I actually think I can see you and Lacey even if you were old hooking up yeah I know this isn’t where you thought I was going with us fine OK yeah she just I was bullshitting you I don’t know what the hell she does during her day she obviously writes on this blog you’re right lame. I don’t know why I read this blog sometimes maybe and I’m just over it, maybe I don’t know but if I do, I am just so fucking over it I was so fucking wrong obviously and I’m just getting over it. I really am I’m starting to get over it OK and yes, I’m a bit of a narcissist and realizing that if there’s reincarnation, I could’ve been aristocrat has definitely changed my view especially her saying that I’m thinking it’s possible if there’s rain Carnation, I mean good grief, she’s right it’s temporary before heaven we are clearly in different places I don’t know why I am a Christian. I don’t tend to think it’s karma. I think it’s some thing else and I don’t know what it is but it’s disturbing and I think we should all be happy and healthy and loved and rich and I don’t think it should be the way that it is but that’s just not reality, so yeah it’s sad moving on. I just wanted to comment because not fine. I don’t know what Lacey looks like in person, and I actually have a feeling she probably is better looking in person.
And I just have to say no, I mean, maybe there’s a little some thing with lambs pasture that’s a tiny bit gay but it’s like a posture. It’s the way he’s standing it’s not him and that’s the thing. It’s like the way he stands with the way he holds his mouth or his eyes that looks gay But it changes from picture to picture so in the one with apple his posture is 100% straight there’s nothing remotely guy about that posture and then his face looks pretty straight in that picture too. There’s really very little in that picture that looks gay. My guess is that he was caught off guard Because he’s laughing in a way that looks pretty sincere. I don’t think maybe he looks a tiny bit gay but I feel like he looks pretty straight in that picture and I think it’s because someone caught him off guard. I think that’s the thing we didn’t see him in person so I have a feeling that when he got caught off guard or when he was just being himself he probably seems straight because he looks pretty straight in the first picture he really does, there’s a tiny bit of some thing in his face where it’s like he’s kind of acting gay, but mostly he just looks straight. I mean really if I just saw that picture of him and he told me he was married and his wife looks like Mary Tyler Moore. I would believe it and I would think that he probably had a totally normal marriage. I would never think he had ever ever been gay. There’s nothing in that first picture that suggests that he’s gay almost at all. I mean there’s a little tiny something in the face but it’s debatable it’s really debatable, and that’s very weird. I’ve known a lot of gay men. I am so much bisexual myself. You can’t really hide it it’s just there it is it’s just there. It is the bit you can just if you know and I don’t think Lacey knows what the gay women look like as much but probably because they’ve lied to her and bullied her instead, but I think you can tell once you know what gay with gay women look like you can tell and I, I think I think he was straight I do I think he was probably straight I think that first picture looks 100% straight almost entirely if not entirely I think it’s obvious that Ethel was trying to sleep with him and it’s sort of pathetic plus Ethel’s hearts him you know it’s also pathetic is that she probably was trying to sleep with him and Dave lied about that. I don’t think that anyone want to say I thought he was straight and was trying to sleep with him because then it just ruined the whole narrative that Jack was the saints, who is somehow mysterious and not some closeted jack ass he was using everybody.
I just wanna say I’m devastated as a bisexual woman because I don’t think it’s likely that he’s not sleeping with you. I just I really doubt it like I’ve been looking at different things if I still read your blog or maybe if I don’t, but for some reason you’re hearing me say this in my spirit at some point and I just I just I think it’s sad because I look at that first picture and I think you know he does look straight. He does look almost completely straight in the second picture, he looks like he could be faking being gay, and really in other pictures. He does look like he could be freaked out by Jack. He doesn’t look like he was a sexual instigator, I’ve looked at pictures of him. He does look like he could be straight and then read Fais thought he was bisexual. That obviously is true. I don’t think it’s possible when I look at the pictures of the two of you together that you’re not sleeping with him if you think your listen sweetie, you’re very beautiful and you do look old. I’ve looked at your pictures before you do have a face that looks old. Tom looks like your dad he does. He looks so much like he could be your father personality your face, your mannerisms your everything you look like you’re his daughter you’re even aging in a way that similar to him. I truly think he could be your dad. I really do I would be not at all surprised if I find that out someday either on this blog or when I’m dead I would be 100% not surprised And I don’t think I don’t think that would’ve been as bad as it was if it wasn’t for the fact that your mom was a total fucking moron and I I am devastated because I think your mom really fucked up I do I think you could be Tom’s daughter and I think your mother totally fucking fucked up. I think your mother totally fucked up, Lacey I I I I just I think you were supposed to be a Millennial OK like you are biologically 40 and honestly I could see you dating someone like Skippy and I don’t know why you didn’t have a mother or someone who loved you who knew you were when you were a teenager who could’ve said you need to start dating people why aren’t you dating people you know like what is going on But you didn’t have anyone like that you didn’t have anyone who gave a fuck about you simulating that way at all I mean maybe there was like one person who said something to you in passing but no your life is totally shit Lacey you have a shit life you’re your in the upper class you’re old money you’re gorgeous you lucked out you’re like a perfect human specimen But your life is a fucking shit aside from what you’ve made of it. It’s total shit and I have a feeling you worked really fucking hard to try to make anything happy for yourself at all like your kids your finances being stable your husband being stable. I think you’ve worked fucking hard to create that for yourself And I don’t think I don’t think that’s at all what you even deserves, but I think that you’ve had to fight to the nail for any of that I just think it’s sad because who who gets to have it all you know you have it all then you don’t get to enjoy it I get to enjoy things that you Don’t then I don’t have as much and I just think who the hell has both like does that even happen and maybe it does you know you and I have an experience that but maybe there are some people who do I can’t help but think there are some people who do you probably have people like that maybe even in your family but I’m not one of them you’re not one of an a lot of people art, and I just wanna say on our behalf. Wow what the hell what’s up with the fucking help you know what to believe any bleep what the hell like I don’t think either of us deserve what we got out of life I feel ripped off and I think you were ripped off too. I’m just saying it I do I think we both got totally ripped off and I just want to say that.
And I just I’m sad and I just I don’t think it’s fair but no I just wanted to say that I want to voice my opinion if it’s possible at all I think one was probably strays I mean he was at least bisexual but I think to me really looks more straight and I think when I see him and Lacey together as I was trying to say Look I’m sorry if there’s no illuminati is gonna hurt someone’s feelings I’m not trying to be a bitch I’m not trying to be hurtful. I I look at them together though and honestly if she has a father who was born in 1894 and somehow she became a member of the greatest generation, which actually makes complete sense to me of her entire aesthetic and her personality if that’s who she really is I don’t think you guys get it that’s just who she is. It’s very easy with her to think she’s being pretentious or somehow she’s faking something she’s not that part of her is creepy or confusing, but it’s not like she’s trying to be, don’t I don’t think I don’t think she’s actually disingenuous and I think that’s where and I see them together then and I read some of the things that he writes on this blog that sounds like he’s I’ve read some of the things that he said when he writes, it sounds like him. It actually sounds like his personality at this even sound somewhat like me I really think it’s him And I don’t think it’s him an alternate universe. I don’t think it’s him time traveling from the past no, I think that it’s him now interacting with her as a ghost I really think that that’s all it is I think I think he’s a ghost I think he’s talking to her and I think he’s been trying to explain on his blog I was straight I faked being gay and there’s proof of it and some of the different things that happened to me That you can sort of you know look at and analyze and come to the conclusion that I was straight. I mean he does smile too much at Jack’s wedding, and it does look sincere and I think there are other times where it just doesn’t seem normal like in that first picture he’s smiling, but it’s a different smile, if he smiled like that at Jack’s wedding, I would wonder what I would do so I think he was sad that Jack was getting married but I don’t think I would think that he was in a good mood. I think he’s smiling in that first picture but there’s something about him that looks Dark. There’s a darkness to him in that picture the first one and people say he was raffish you know here’s the thing what the hell even is that OK? Because what I am just gonna have to say it I I think I think he has picked up Lacey as a ghost, I think I think he’s picked up Lacey as a ghost not a 72-year-old man is a dead man who’s over 100 I think he’s picked her up I do I think he has picked her up I think they’re together and I doubt that she could really be with anyone else at this point. I don’t think I don’t think it’s possible I mean I could be wrong, but I would be shocked And I don’t think you’ll probably disappear. I have a feeling the relationship will probably progress over time. I have a feeling it already has eight I don’t think you guys get it. He’s a real person and he’s dead and she’s talking to me in someway that’s rather mysterious, but This is where I need to be able to say this if some thing is stopping me you need to stop. I look at their pictures together and I think if she is experiencing a physical manifestation of a man having sex with her and I don’t think it’s possible, if that entity is claiming to be lame that it isn’t him, I don’t think it’s possible that’s a very strong statement but I have to say it because that’s my gut sense and I tend to be aware of stuff OK fine maybe it’s possible but I don’t think it’s likely just looking at their pictures looking at him, thinking, he looks straight And then thinking she could’ve had a father who was born in 1894 when I look at their pictures together no I don’t think it’s possible that they’re not sleeping together if there is an entity who is repeatedly sleeping with her and she’s physically experiencing it and he claims to be lame. I don’t think it’s possible that she’s not sleeping with One Billings I don’t think it’s possible.
So if there’s no illuminati wake the fuck up, I don’t think it’s possible that she’s not sleeping with Lem’s Billings. I don’t think it’s possible.
Oh, and yes Bobby, this goes out to you specifically and any other Kennedy in the afterlife or in the current physical realm who can hear me. This is not Lacey saying that this is my spirit practically manifesting through time and space I don’t think it’s possible that she’s not sleeping with Lem’s Billings or Lem unless if you don’t for certain from sexual things that he did with you that were really clear was probably straight Bobby and Ethel and Caroline and everyone else he was probably straight he was probably straight are you deaf spiritually? Or stop trying to kill Lacey and harass her because I have a very strong suspicion that when she dies we’re toast if there’s no who Menotti you people fucked the fuck up.
She should not have fallen down the stairs she should not be anemic. She should be dying right now that’s so fucking stupid. I am stupid but that’s even stupider.
No I’m sorry he doesn’t look gay. That is not a gay smile. That is not a gay laugh. It’s not get a grip. I don’t see any fucking difference between him, and every straightman of his age group that I’ve ever seen who are wealthy, especially he looks straight. He looks almost 100% straight in that first picture that I have to believe is far more accurate because he looks like he’s being caught off guard. He looks straight he looks entirely straight and I don’t think you have evidence to suggest that he wasn’t. I think you’ve made that up Bobby in your own fucking head although I don’t know that for a fact, but I wouldn’t be the slightest bit surprised if you and your whole fucking family deluded yourselves, and to thinking he was gay, and then you took it take it out most of western society with you I mean good God you didn’t you could even let red face say he was bisexual you had to even lie about that you could’ve just been smart and been like maybe he was bisexual, but you know he was in love with Jack why can’t you do that because you’re all fucking narcissist and you knew for a fact that if someone read that he was bisexual That they would probably start wondering if he was ever in love with Jack at all or they wonder what the hell really even happened and Bobby that’s where you’re an idiot. Your whole family is stupid as hell because why was that a loud why didn’t someone say I don’t know I kind of think he seems bisexual. I kind of think red faith thought he was bisexual. You know why Bobby maybe because he helped kill your uncle Sincerely I am a little worried that he literally was in on the plot to kill your uncle Jack. I think the CIA might have been a part of it but I really think that they hated him for a reason and honestly I’m getting to see why based on your presidency Excuse me your run for presidency I mean what the hell like are we supposed to support you or not know this entire country has turned into a shit show and it is very eerie how it happened right around the time. Lacey started thinking she was talking to somebody and she couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on no I’m sorry if there’s an illuminati, you are so fucking hot. You are so fucking hot.
Caught not hot.
And yeah Bobby, you coming out and saying oh I talk to dead people yeah no fucking shit you talk to dead people you know what else Michael Jackson wrote a post on this blog about how your wife is your sugar, mama and then a day or two later you end up having a running mate who is also your sugar mama whether she sleeping with you or not Your money belongs to Cheryl Bobby you are obviously terrible with money. Obviously you are terrible with money. I have a feeling your whole family is to be honest and that is so I’m sorry I’m embarrassed at people who are not old money. That is so new money that is so painfully new money, having no idea how to handle the money that they have thinking they’re being smart by doing one thing and then it really not being as smart as they think it is I mean no it’s sad and, I’m just angry right now because I have a very strong suspicion that you’re pissed off at Lacey and that she’s probably almost being suffocated as she’s writing this and I don’t think that’s right
I am I’m sorry, but no if there’s illuminati, you guys got caught and no motor brainwashing is ever going to change that you’ll never convince me or a lot of other people that have been watching that this isn’t real potentially listen, there is either definitely a supernatural or there’s an illuminati or there’s both I think it’s far more likely that there’s both And I really highly doubt that as I said all that that your brain didn’t revert back to thinking long was gay, but no, Bobby love was not gay that was probably straight, and I have a very strong suspicion that he’s probably in a very committed monogamous sexual relationship with Lacey and what sad to me I was trying to say is that she isn’t able to experience that because I have a feeling that it’s a real relationship and it’s sad because it’s very daring of her to even come out and say it at all I mean oh my word I don’t think I’ve ever seen somebody be this direct and honest about anything of that nature ever, which is so add mirable and sad because I can say with some relief that there seems to be some contingency of women who are somewhat supportive of her in the LGBTQ community but and maybe even a few trans people but I know I feel like most people are very antagonistic Especially gay men. And I don’t know why they don’t get it. You keep it this is Lacey would agree with me you keep adding these things on 2+ XYTQBGMNLMNOP. Yeah we’re gonna fucking get everyone in the community at some point yes, she says yes she’s straight, but she is has a father who was born in 1894 and it probably isn’t even an orientation. It’s probably just that those men are really on the same wavelength as her and they’re probably really who she’s meant to be with and so given how her life is gone, I don’t think she’s had a choice but to fall in love with them because Skippy couldn’t she could’ve married a Skippy Skippy was it it was a Gen X her, and if she’d had a parent who gave a shit about her they would’ve realized that and thought I think you should probably date somebody who is an older person not like old necessarily but like older I think you need to start looking at older men a little differently when she was probably in her 20s but no one ever did that no one said I don’t think your husbands gonna be I don’t think it’s gonna be easy to find a guy your age. You’re so mature for your age you should probably date someone a little older than you, but no no one ever said that to her and it’s just it irritates me because know she’s in a bad marriage her health is declining, and I really strongly suspect it has come to the point where she is in a monogamous committed sexual relationship with a ghost, I really do I think she’s in an actual relationship with a ghost I think it’s a thing I think some people have that experience I don’t think it’s an orientation I think it’s just a sexual experience that some people have I think the ghost and Mrs. mirror is cleaned up bullshit I have a feeling that in reality they were sleeping together which is why they make jokes about it and they’re like were they lovers and he’s like I’m gonna sleep in your bedroom with you and then at the same time he’s like but I am a ghost, so I think sexual is going to happen. I just want to sleep in your room with you and I don’t want you to be with anyone else and I’ll make sure that there’s nobody else that you could possibly be with but, well I am sleeping in your bed with you and well. I am shoeing everyone else away. Are you know I’m not going to have sex with you no that’s absurd. Listen if they can move things like doors I’m pretty sure they can have sex and if he is in the bedroom with her know, and I’m not sure that every spiritual entity that people interact with sexually is human, some people have an actual orientation where they’re just attracted to the supernatural that’s not what Lacey is but I don’t know why she wouldn’t be included in that community and that’s the thing because it’s not a typical sexual experience. I am even though it says it’s straight and it’s not her orientation it’s unusual, but no I I think that’s her people have to be a little smarter because how the hell does this make sense OK so this ghost is possessive of Mrs. mirror then there’s portrait of Jenny and I mean it what the heck were they doing if they weren’t, you know making out occasionally or something and obviously he ends up dead, and they end up being together, but I don’t understand why I don’t understand why that isn’t what’s happening to her I mean no I have a feeling that that she’s actually in a committed relationship with them. I’m sorry if that’s devastating to the Kennedys to hear but I don’t think that he was straight gay I think he was at least bisexual. If not, actually I think he was just straight. I’m sorry I do I think he was straight And I think it’s been very confusing because they’re actual ghosts and I have a feeling that Louis and Michael and Harold and I wouldn’t be surprised by Eli Roosevelt actually have had an interest in her as well and I don’t know that it’s the saddles as Linn wants it to be and if that’s his fault, then he hast to deal with that I think Lacey wants it to be settled but I think it’s just extraordinarily painful and sad and I think that’s where they’ve got a let go if they don’t have total absolute truth that he was gay I don’t think they have a leg to stand on and I think they just made absolute ass of themselves. If there’s an illuminati and enough, there’s not what I think the dead half potentially, but if there isn’t illuminati, no, they made absolute ass of themselves because, you can they can’t keep holding onto him he wasn’t born into their family and even if he was obi, really perverted and weird and you know it honestly reading her blog, I’ve read some of her short stories, and I have a very strong, subconscious memory or conscious memory of her writing about Joe. I am almost positive. I think she might’ve written about other people to like Louis, because I have a feeling that there is at least one story where Louis was involved somehow but regardless him I I have a very strong suspicion that I was being gracious and letting her be with Joe before Pat Wilson died and I think I I think that’s weird so if there’s an illuminati I can’t I want to turn the tables at this point and just look look at the illuminati and I just want to say from the Perfume community if I’m still considered a part of it because I actually think they might be a little angry at me why why the hell did you guys assume that Lacey wasn’t having sexual encounters with Joe? Why did you think that she wasn’t having some sort of sexual experience with Joe if you guys are so sophisticated and so worldly and so understanding of the supernatural why did you guys think it was impossible that she was having a sexual relationship with Joe Kennedy Junior?” says Casi.
“ because everyone claims to be having a sexual relationship with somebody in our family Casi.” says Joe I.
Casi laughs. “ yeah they do except they don’t all discover the illuminati. They’re also not all extraordinarily beautiful or artistic or his type or from a family that has oil, so why didn’t it occur so you guys back before Bobby started running for office before you guys blew up your entire fucking family name why didn’t you realize that assuming she wasn’t in a relationship with Joe Junior was dangerous?” says Casi.
“ because everybody, everybody and their mother, Casi thinks they’re having a relationship with us or they imagine they could.” says Bobby.
“ I think that’s a little delusional and I want to know what the real reason is.” says Casi.
“ yeah actually I kind of want to know too.” says Marsie.
“ yeah so do I.” says Tsar Putin.
“ I thought she could be Pat Wilson reincarnated until I looked into it and then I realize that it wasn’t possible that she could be Pat and I felt bad for her to, but I didn’t take her seriously enough as a person and I have to say her attitude creeps me out because her attitude reminds me it’s so eerie. It reminds me of my attitude but then it’s like how the hell does she have my attitude and then I think you know is she obsessed with us and she was intrigued by my family, but not as much as we thought she was, and so that kind of confused us, because we realized over time that she was just similar to us in ways that were creepy, and it couldn’t be accounted for with her stocking us or reading books about us or anything of that nature. It was all stuff that she didn’t even know was similar like that search I was fascinated by David and that she was depressed and that she was getting involved in the college Democrats there was somebody searching and Lacey were a little bit alike, it’s creepy and there’s other people that relate to Lacey to and it’s just it’s it’s cake it’s creepy and so we sort of rationalized it I thinking oh no it’s not something super natural and bizarre. It’s it’s that you know she is been stocking us, but now we realize in the last few years, if that’s impossible because there’s some stuff that similar that she would have no way of even just there’s no way for her to discover that, so now it’s very likely that she had some supernatural connection to my family and I don’t entirely know how that all works. I don’t know if it’s just that lame was there and he influenced everybody so much that we all sort of became like her which is actually probably really dysfunctional because then are we even supposed to be that similar to her, or is that part of why we followed it up darling you know it’s like how how do I explain all that I don’t know but I am to make a long story short I am narcissistic and a lot of other people in my family are.” says Bobby.
“ but see I still think there’s something there that you’re not dealing with and I think it’s part of the reason why you can’t except that line wasn’t gay and that he’s in a relationship with Lacey and I think it could even be super natural. I think your family has been trying to fit in with upper class old money for over 100 years and I think that she is a disaster because I don’t think you were planning for it. I think she’s a Lemmers twin flame. I think they’re in a relationship and I think her showing up is a worst-case scenario. I don’t think you anticipated that his wife would show up, I don’t think you thought she’d show up but here she is here’s here’s Linn‘s wife who turns out he enjoys sleeping with and would’ve preferred being with over your uncle or any other anyone else probably ever live so then worst case scenario you’re full of shit you had no fucking clue what his real orientation was you just lied to yourselves. You lied to yourselves and you told everyone else the same lie that he was gay and everyone believed you if she dies or even passes out I know exactly who did it.
I know your your your eggs are are hatching. She is lambs twin, flame and she’s not even trying to confront you want it you’re just to psychotically obsessed with the idea that he was gay to let go with him. And he’s never going to be gay because he never was and the one way your family ever made it into the upper class by having him join. You has disappeared because turns out you really were just holding him hostage. Turns out you really were just using him and he was vulnerable and confused and straight Turns out you ruined his life and now you’ve lost all your money to Bobby and so you have to help him and help you pay for stuff. Turns out the Kennedys aren’t rich anymore and the house is probably in decay and I bet that when Ethel dies it’ll be hard to know what to do with it won’t it Someone will inherit it and they’ll be some story about the person inheriting it and it’ll make it seem like they’re really rich and it was a really big deal but you know what they won’t talk about an NBC news how shitty the roof is or the mold problems in the walls or the fact that the sewer system is indicate and it’s absolute shit or that the wiring needs to be redone yet again or that there’s problems with certain walls. I know they won’t talk about all those problems that are wrong with the house. It’s a beautiful house. I’m sure it still is gorgeous to be in but I have a feeling that it’s not in the best shape it’s probably not in terrible shape, but it’s probably not as good of a shape as it should be And I doubt that it’s probably worth more than 12 million I mean maybe it’s worth 15 or 20 but that’s that’s the most that it’s worth maybe maybe 30 but really 30 million is not that much when I think about her her her father was worth 50 and how her whole family is worth 100 million and that’s just what they have at your house being worth 30 doesn’t seem that impressive. I’m sorry like, it’s just not that impressive breakers is worth 100 million or 200 million or something I don’t know there’s a reason nobody lives there anymore but it’s extremely expensive and they could afford that kind of opulence back then I don’t think your family can afford your house, Bobby I think Ethel’s dying there but I don’t think you guys can really afford that house and I think that’s part of the reason you’re running for president and he would be perfectly honest with you. That’s why I don’t understand your family. I don’t know why they don’t just support you because that actually makes more sense long-term if you’re running partially to get money to rescue your house I don’t know why they’re not just supporting you.
I have a feeling I mean I know I can get us there trying to stay in good terms on good terms with the Democratic Party because if they don’t, they’ll probably be in trouble cause I don’t have that much money or power anymore and so they have to kiss ass because if they don’t, they’re in deep shit that’s why but beyond that I don’t know why they are doing it because it’s really financially probably in their interest for you to win no you guys don’t have that much money anymore and I’m just putting I’m just putting that out there also I have to say it’s funny hearing her kids I’ve never heard them. I have a feeling that they actually sound like those people and those kids sound like they belong in the 1950s television show. They do have a feeling that they’re very normal kids and they fit in with their peers, but I wouldn’t be surprised if if they’re actually capable of also fitting in with Boomers or other people who are older and that amuses me their kids, but it amuses me because what the hell like you don’t you guys don’t get what’s going on let me just explain this to you OK and then I think Lacey needs to go, but this is the muses me to no end to be this voice of reason right now, considering how awful I’ve been to her and the problems I’ve caused it amazes me that I am being such a voice of reason But OK let me just explain something to you if Lacey is in a sexual relationship with Lem’s Billings and then we can probably assume that he’s not gay now sorry I had to say that no if if she is in a sexual relationship with him Billings Lacey is straight she says no he’s not gay I don’t know that he ever was according to him if this is him he was never gay, but so we could assume though that he’s not gay now and I think that’s more than a safe assumption if this is if she sleeping with him no it’s more than a safe assumption Based on the sense that I got is more than safe assumption that he’s not gay I am I do you think they’re in love I don’t think it’s likely if he if they can if they’re sleeping together I don’t think it’s likely that he’s probably going to let go of the whole thing I mean; say oh, I think he would but I doubt it but he is and he’s very he has his energy with her. Sincerely it is creepy I don’t know how else to say it it’s just not likely there’s some thing about it I just don’t think it’s possible, he because I actually think he’s capable of being really deeply in love with someone and I have a feeling she would probably be someone he be capable of loving that deeply. I don’t think that she has a choice. I don’t think she has a choice because I think he knows better and he knows that she doesn’t, she doesn’t have a choice because he just loves her that much because he knows what she’s looking for and I think he thinks no no this is it and you just don’t have a choice anymore and then she thinks well I don’t think I’d want to choice and he’s like oh of course not For the NASA thing if he was actually straight then it is it it it it really is even worse because I don’t think you I think he was a virgin when he died. Oh I don’t think you ever slept with a woman and I think he slept with her And I think he basically lost his virginity to her which brings her back to some thing I was trying to say he’s raffish. What does that mean? I have a feeling what it means is that if she was 16 and he was 50 he would’ve slept with her I have a feeling it means that he made allowances for Jack that he should not have made. I have a feeling that if they were 15 he probably would’ve had a marriage and they would’ve been grandparents possibly by now I think he’s raffish in a way, but I think he’s also not raffish I think he’s a very sexy man and that’s different than raffish. I think he I think he could be a bit raffish at times but I don’t think he’s quite the way you’ve depicted him, I think he is no more raffish than her husband and I think it’s a little stupid. I think he’s just a little more daring than most people in some ways, and I think he probably is also more sensitive and loyal, and I think I think that to be honest and Skippy could’ve been raffish to, I think that Mark price the actor who plays Skippy is a bit raffish. I actually think that character could’ve been that but just wasn’t for some reason but I don’t think it’s that. I don’t think you guys got it that doesn’t make him gay just because there’s something a little bit like edgy about him does not make him gay.
So that’s the problem I think what you’ve got is a little boy and a little girl whose father is dead no really I really think this is true. I think I think they know their dad is dead. I think that they’ve probably been sad about it. He and I think that that’s the problem I think that there I think that they’re fine but I think of Lacey died within the next 10 years that it be very unlikely that those kids would not both end up dead in car accidents, or from cancer or having some thing fall on them or dying in their sleep, they’ll end up dead her kids will end up dead and I don’t think it’s likely that her husband won’t either so if there is an illuminati and even if there isn’t, I highly doubt that if she dies that those kids will end up alive and I think that’s where you people have to lay off This is not going to end well this is not going to end. Well you’ve got a let go of it you’ve got to deal with the reality of what you’ve done because I don’t think it’s going to end well and that speaking from experience I don’t think it’s going to end. Well, I really don’t.” says Casi.
“ casi what does that have to do with Lem being possibly bisexual?” says Bobby.
“He was straight.” says Casi.
“Yeah. Okay.” says Bobby.
“ so why does it matter him because I think that you’ve pissed them off too much and I don’t think that you continuing to antagonize them bodes well for a lot of people.” says Casi.
Keen to Cross the Pond 
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