“I have to confess. I may have had sex with Casi.” says Alisha.
I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry plays.
“I’m not at all a lesbian.” says Lacey.
JFK shakes his head in denial.
“Jack why don’t you like that Lacey is not a lesbian?” asks a man.
“SHE IS MY MUMMY!!!” screams JFK.
“No Jack she’s not.” says God.
“I WANT HER TO BE A LESBIAN!!” bellows Jack Kennedy.
“Because of Lem?” says the man.
“Would you let me talk!?” screams JFK.
“We are, Jack.” says John Lithgow.
“Look…LACEY IS A LESBIAN!!!” screams JFK.
“So you’re in love with Lem…and you need us to believe he was gay and that she was a lesbian?” asks John Lithgow.
“NO!!!!” says JFK.
“So from you that’s a yes?” says John Lithgow.
“Just let me go back to sleep!!!” screams Jack Kennedy.
Jack dances to Katy Perry. He’s started to “experiment” “again” with women.
“HE IS SO OBVIOUSLY not Lacey.” says John Lithgow.
The song starts over.
“So you genuinely think he’s not her?” asks a desperate Illuminati.
“YES!! He’s obviously sexually experienced with women. Lacey…gets squeamish and grossed out by sexual contact with other women. It’s SO FUCKING OBVIOUS. …DEAR GOD!!!” says John Lithgow in exasperation.
“I can’t stand that!” says Erin.
“Erin we don’t have sex either.” says John Lithgow. “Did you imagine we were or would or easily could?”
“Yeah?” says Erin, embarrassed.
The song plays.
“Are you actually attracted to women!?” says Lacey to Katy Perry.
The song plays.
The song ends.
The song starts over.
“Yes. But…not often.” says Katy Perry.
“So…you’re bisexual but totally violently closeted?” says Lacey to Katy Perry.
Russia laughs.
“Yeah. I guess.” says Katy Perry.
“Why do you do that!?” says Lacey, offended.
“Because I’m not actually as comfortable with homosexuality as I pretend to be.” admits Katy Perry.
“So then what the fuck was this song about!?” says Lacey.
“I was being both good and evil.” says Katy.
“So how many of you ladies are closeted?” asks a Belgian gay perfume collector, genuinely confused.
“Let’s say this is Alisha:
“I’m trying to channel Helena Bonham Carter, and Lacey and May in that picture because I want to be fucked. I wanna be fucked and worship too bitch and I wanna be hilarious too! By…someone!” yells Alisha.
“She doesn’t really look that much like my wife, but evil demons and people are helping living humans look like people to try to threaten us.” says Lem. “No I am not attracted to Alisha Garrity. I think she’s actually rather ugly and plain but I don’t think she’d be able to handle hearing that and so the whole fucking world automatically feels incredibly unfathomably sorry for her.
“What did Alisha look like before she fucked Casi to smite you?” asks the gay perfume community.
“Oh wow! She has changed.” says a gay perfume collector.
“But I think my eyes look like Scotia’s!!!” yells Alisha, crying.
“So DO MINE!! Hey! Maybe she isn’t even real!??” says this woman
“OH MY GOD!! SOMEONE GRAB LEM’S DICK. HE’S GETTING AWAY!!!” yells JFK.
“They LOOK NOTHING ALIKE!!!” yells John Lithgow.
Millions of living and some dead women cry. Pour. Scream. As JFK dances in 1912 to arouse them and control them all like an evil puppeteer.
“Oh my god! It’s Britney Spears!” says Britney Spears mocking people who often say Lacey looks like Britney Spears.
“They’re almost identical.” says a ghost hunter who’s Queen Elizabeth I if there’s reincarnation.
“They’re IDENTICAL!!” yells God. “SHE IS SCOTIA IF THERE’S REINCARNATION!!!!”
“BUT SO DO I!!!” say Alisha, violently but very nicely.
“Actually I think I look like Lacey and lots of other women! CHILL OUT GUYS!” says Alisha. “Geez!”
“No. We do not look alike really.” says Helena Bonham Carter. “But you are clearly cheating and channeling me, inappropriately.”
“Illegally, really.” says the Illuminati. “Alisha if this was at all intentional…you’re a thief.”
“But don’t we?” says Alisha, weeping practically.
“No! There’s a HUGE DIFFERENCE!! You may be violently violating her psychically. But you don’t actually look like her. ALISHA…you aren’t May or Lacey…nor Helena.” says God.
“I AM!!!!” yells Alisha violently, throwing a fit.
“NO YOU ARE NOT!” says God.
“Please!?” says Alisha to God.
“NO!” says God.
“But then how will I ever be happy!?” says Alisha, FREAKING OUT.
“Alisha…you aren’t as glorious as me nor Lacey. Do you have a hard time with me too?” asks God.
“Come to think of it…yes.” says Alisha. “HOW DARE YOU!”
“How dare I be God instead of you!?” says God to Alisha.
“Yes.” says Alisha.
“Alisha do you even want to be Lacey or God?” asks a reader.
“No! I’m like you. …I want to be sexy…cool and fun…but without the effort or pain. I want to steal Lacey’s soul…steal her identity and be God. But…the easy way.” says Alisha.
“Wow. That’s extremely evil Alisha.” says Jonah Wiley.
Rich Girl by Gwen Stefani plays.
“But Alisha, you don’t look like Scotia.” says God.
“No. She just doesn’t!” say a group of Rosicrucianists. “As in, Alisha just doesn’t look like Scotia nor Lacey.”
“BUT THEN LEM WAS STRAIGHT!” yells Bobby. “Because Alisha also looks a hell of a lot like Helena.”
“And ELISABETH MOSS!” screams the CIA.
“Damn! You all are SUCH FILTHY FREAKS from HELL if this was intentional.” says the CIA to Alisha and Casi.
“Alisha…you are CLEARLY trying to imitate both Lacey and Helena.” says a gay perfume collector. “How did you figure out it was Elisabeth Moss and Helena helping Lacey?”
“She’s mentioned them.” says Alisha.
“Yeah. I once chewed Lacey out over Helena Bonham Carter.” says Casi. “I claimed to be her. Or a lot like her. In a way Lacey isn’t. Literally. Because Lacey said she admired Helena’s sense of style.”
“WHEN!?” yells Russia.
“IN 2015?” says Casi, baffled by what the problem is.
“Yup. The photos Alisha used subconsciously or consciously to channel Lacey and Helena are on the blog. We aren’t going to keep catering to Alisha’s lower IQ.” says God. “Nor Jack’s nor Erin’s.”
“So…why Helena?” asks Mary the Mother of God.
“Because she’s a British aristocrat. And we reckoned she was a fraud-good-person like Lacey.” says Alisha.
“Why?” asks God.
“I’m probably richer than Helena.” says Alisha.
“But she’s rich.” says Ireland to Alisha.
“Ahh…moviestars go through money fast. I have a feeling she’s poor now. Like 50 Cent.” says Alisha.
“She’s not poor…” says a Native American woman, who’s suddenly baffled by the perfume community. “Helena Bonham Carter?
She came from Old Money.” says a confused Native American.
“But that’s the:
CHEAP SILVER!
And this…place.” says Alisha.
“$60 million isn’t that much.” says Lacey.
“Yes! And Helena volunteered a lot! She’s very philanthropic!” says Jim Craft, confused. “What do you expect Alisha? For the whole world to literally revolve around you? …You know? I mean…it’s insane.
Could you try to understand!?”
Alisha looks upset.
“You’re not supposed to care about Lacey!” she says looking for more clues how to imitate Lacey and other Old Money “characters.”
“Why don’t you get it!? You’re NOT HER!!!” yells Jim.
“Why are you defending her?” asks JFK of Jim.
“GO AWAY, JACK!!” yells Jim Craft, literally pushing him away.
“Give me a kiss!” says JFK trying to rape Jim now to get him to stop trying to defend Lacey.
God has to subdue Jack.
“So…you’re a closeted lesbian?” Jonah Wiley asks Alisha.
Alisha looks disturbed.
Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” plays again.
“You’re GAY!? You!?” says Jonah Wiley to Alisha.
“Yeah. Kinda. Maybe.” says Alisha.
“I never would have thought that.” says Jonah.
“Wanna have a foursome in Heaven!??” says Jonah to Alisha, excitedly. He rubs his hands together in anticipation.
“Ahh…with you?” says Alisha to Jonah.
“OH MY GOD! YES! …What’s wrong with me?” says Jonah, hurt.
“I can’t. Lacey would never. Neither would Helena. …And I have to stay in character.” says Alisha.
Circus by Britney Spears plays.
(Adult content below)
“Oh! Because Lacey’s so sweet?” says Jonah.
“YES! She’s a stuck-up, uptight, peasant butch bitch.” says Alisha.
“Not really.” says Jonah.
“Okay.” says Alisha.
“So…you wanna have fun!?” says Jonah seducing Alisha.
Alisha comes close to losing her mind in real sexual pleasure.
Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado plays.
“Jack is this another song about you?” asks Africa.
“DUH!!!! He’s a sort of skinwalker.” says God. “Yes, I’m talking about Jack Kennedy.”
Alisha stands naked as Jonah prepares to penetrate her. Moaning in ecstasy.
Curb Your Enthusiasm as performed by Megaraptor plays for us.
“Oh my god!” says Alisha. “This is weird. My boobs are so big. And I feel so…weird.”
“WHY??” says Jonah.
“Because I’m not a comedian!” says Alisha.
“You’re not a WHAT!?” says Jonah.
Alisha laughs. “I’m not a liar!” she says, almost absentmindedly.
September by Sparky Deathcap plays as Alisha walks off naked…very awkwardly. And honestly somewhat masculine.
“Alisha…I’m not being funny!!” says Jonah…racing after Alisha.
“I’m not listening!!” yells Alisha, covering her ears.
“Come to me!!!” yells Jonah at Alisha.
“No Jonah!” yells Alisha.
“Come to me!” yells Jonah.
“Jonah. No. I’m not your girl.” says Alisha.
“You can be! Come here!” says Jonah, opening his arms wide.
“No! You’re silly!” says Alisha.
Jonah giggles. “I think you look purty!” he says smiling.
Alisha weeps.
It’s OK (Slowed) by Edith Whiskers plays.
Jonah holds her. Rocks her in his arms.
She backs away from him.
“WHY!?” she says to Jonah.
“Because! I’m like that!” says Jonah. “Alisha…I’m just like that.”
“No. I’m LEAVING!” says Alisha.
“No. Stay!” says Jonah to Alisha, very sexy and dramatic and possibly sincere.
Daylight by David Kushner plays.
“We can’t help it.” says Jonah to Alisha.
And at that they race into each’s arms and start making awkward, intimate, love.
2:10
“What about me!?” says Casi, awkwardly emerging.
Ahh…what inspired the Illuminati to put a curse on top of an already extremely cursed situation? They saw it in a movie. And while movies can be helpful…they aren’t…safe to follow like we may follow the wind.
And i’d go a thousand miles by Montell Fish plays as Alisha and Jonah have sex.
Casi stands and watches in confusion. Arms limp at her sides.
Hidden In the Sand by Tally Ho plays.
Softcore by The Neighbourhood plays.
And Casi just stands there. Watching.
They all just “hang-out” in a posh upper middle class American kitchen. Either in the here and now in their spirits or…in the after life.
Universe by David Kushner plays.
Casi starts mumbling to herself. She backs away. Rests in her arm on the pretty counter top. She seems to be in the same mood as Stephen Root from “Office Space” was in about his stapler.
The song ends and Alisha and Jonah move upstairs.
Casi just stands there wearing “lesbian clothes.”
Sit Down Beside Me by Patrick Watson plays.
Casi hears it and if she has a soul at all she breaks into weeping. She falls to the ground. Weeping. She leans against a cabinet on the ground.
She cries for a while.
Stretches out her legs. Crosses them, thinking. Holds her hand to her mouth. Wipes her nose. Stares off into the adjoining living-room.
Then she winces in pain.
3:58
The song ends.
She ugly cries.
Meet Virginia by Train plays and Casi is forced to listen to it.
“Listen! If I’m Virginia…
Honey! SHUT-UP!!” yells Casi at
I can’t!!” screams Casi.
“Oh MY GOD!!!” says a reader. “Lacey reminded you of HIM!?!?”
“Yes. If there’s reincarnation that was one of JFK’s tricks. He fooled Casi in her subconscious into thinking Scotia was Emperor Napoleon III.
They look a lot alike. But that’s just genetics. Somehow. She’s not actually him.” says a man.
Meet Virginia by Vitamin String Quartet plays.
“WHY?” Casi yells at Emperor Napoleon III.
“But they’re obviously different people!” screams Queen Elizabeth I.
Shufflesteppin’ by Takénobu plays.
“Why did the Illuminati think Lacey was JFK?” asks a reader.
“Because we make stuff up. …To feel more elite.” says Billie Eilish. “Traditional z Rosicrucianists believed the eyes were the window the soul. …But today’s Illuminati…takes far too many shortcuts. We…sometimes just go with what makes us feel even slightly less unhappy momentarily.”
“So you go around evaluating people’s souls…and then…if this person
Seems like this person:
You just go with it!???” screams a reader.
“Yah!” says Chris Hayes.
“So…you think it’s unfathomable that Lacey would mistake Chris for Michael?!? …But you make HUGE mistakes daily!?” a reader asks the current Illuminati.
“YES.” says Chris Hayes.
“Wow.
What THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU!??” yells an American at the current Illuminati.
“I’m a Jew! First and foremost!” says Kate Shaw Hayes, proudly.
“That’s what my husband vaguely looked like. In his last life. If there’s reincarnation.
My people have never been convinced reincarnation doesn’t exist. …And we could be wrong! Okay!? But…my husband is secretly a good Jew. If there’s reincarnation.” says Kate Shaw Hayes.
“That’s a home very similar to the one he grew-up in. And owned until probably the 1970’s or so.” says Kate Shaw Hayes.
“Kate that’s a beautiful house! But it doesn’t absolve you of all guilt!” says a Rosicrucianist.
“Don’t worry about the fact that I kill Michael Rockefeller, and Papua New Guinea.
Architect of the Mind by Kerry Muzzey plays.
We have to defeat the British!
This is motto of war, death and seduction.
We are at a crisis moment.
I am Jack Kennedy, your guide to the afterlife, whether you like it or not.
We will let the Rockefellers suffer the momentary loss of Michael Rockefeller, man of some stature and importance to his family. I stand by them united in suffering and grief as the President of the United States of America! We shall stand united in victory against the darkness!
Today I come to you with some sad news. I’m about to tell you something very humorous…and it is Saturday, but not Saturday night in America, yet. I had to attack Great Britain using Lem Billings’s penis. Yes…I had to attack the British empire through one man’s underpants.
Do you want to laugh? I can tell. But it is not funny. We are at war.
The British are on the run. They are running away. …But I will stand united with Emperor Napoleon III of France, Emperor Constantine, my lover, if there be reincarnation. He is rhe heart of my soul, my soft place, my guiding arm! …I will stand united against Lacey Banks and her tits. …Yes, I said it! We will stand united against Lacey tank-or Lacey Banks. There I said it! She has a perverse nasty name, Lacey…Banks. It makes you think dirty thoughts about her boobs and lacey underwear. I find that important. …And I will not stand for it! Stop laughing. I’m being serious this time. I told good jokes while I was alive, but this is a serious matter.
We will stay united through the awe-inspiring force of Lem’s penis against Lacey‘s, big sexy tits in lace underwear to defeat the nation of Great Britain…once…and for all…for the nation of JAPAN!!” says Jack Kennedy, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, JFK.
“Lacey just for clarification: you find Jews attractive and if I’m Jewish slightly I’m just your type. Is that true?” says Chris Hayes to Lacey.
“Yes! I seem to find Jewish men attractive. You are not my lover. And I am not with you. …But you are my type.” says Lacey to Chris Hayes. “If you’re Jewish you are my type. …And you looked like Michael Rockefeller.”
“We will stand united. No weapon formed against us shall stand, even though his penis penetrate her vagina, and they orgasm together and scream at others love, we will not worry. For even though we go through the shadow of death, I shall fear not…because God rod and staff shall comfort me. Take from virtues and scripture at this time all the wisdom you can. The wisdom of the Buddhist people who are my friends. I am not a man to be trifled with…and neither are you.” says JFK.
I Kissed A Girl (3-Track) by Katy Perry plays.
“That sax scene is inspired by the bullshit that I saw Lem Billings doing with Lacey Banks and her tits in Great Britain in 1896.
He died older. She was not a young woman anymore…when he died.
I saw them having sex or what they call sex. But I know what real love is about. You have to have pain and misery not just be entertained by people like me…be really rich and then end-up together when you’re dead! NO! That is really wrong…and unfair…as I used to say, ‘Life is unfair!’ …But I did not expect death to be unfair as well!
I am at war with Christ. We will go to war against Christ and His Kingdom together. He loves the British people just as much if not more than he loves the Japanese…and I hate Him for it. It is evil! He has no right to love them, Hotaki! I will punish Lem Billings with my cock up his ass if I can simply convince Mother Nature and Satan, and all of you and Jesus to join me through the united power of Lem Billings and his hard cock. I captured it in my mouth in my dreams once in Nazi Germany when I was trying to get him hard to give me anal sax.
But you all know that the victory has been won for me through Christ Jesus, our Lord and Savior.
David Pitts wrote a book about it! Louis Bayard was very nice to Jackie…but I was still insulted…and I am very upset that people are questioning whether or not I love buildings…and whether or not I have a made love just because Kirk LeMoyne Billings never had orgasm with me does not mean that my hundreds of orgasms in his mouth do not qualify! …Man! Get real!
Lem Billings’s orgasms do not need to exist with me for them to count as mine!
If they go in her vagina or in her mouth or on her body, they are still null and void through the power of Jesus Christ. How is that? Because I say so! Just because I say so! Is very complicated so logically I don’t care until actually maybe you have idea how it works. Kind of like sending them out into outer space. We work together to figure out how when he come in I am him!
I hope body count is on!
God says she exist. I say hookah hookah at all! I go inside her body hookah!
See I pee in the toilet! I pee in the toilet! Is not my lover. The toilet is not my soulmate, you dumbass. And a loss for toilet!
If you’re going to create a child with your sperm, it is only like pee and the sperm comes out of the penis. You see when you’re all with anybody…even a dirty piece of fucking shit like Lacey Banks…sperm does succeed in coming out. …And in ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ it was a mockery of what I would experience in Heaven with one Mr. Kirk LeMoyne Billings. Lemmers. Kirkus. LEM! BILL! MY COCK TOY!!! MY CORNCOB!
Christ is my traitor.
But I am Japanese and I understand how Jesus thinks.
I got Jesus!!!
And I will conquer Lacey Banks in all reality…cause she make me sad.
Some people say I am only jealous of Lem Billings and that I hate Lacey for getting in my way but that is not reality. Reality is I hate Lacey. I am jealous of LACEY!!! Not love! No. It is in Lem’s COCK!
I am after Vladimir Putin as well. I will make a list of men who will be my lover, and then I will conquer Jesus, for God.
Womanizer by Britney Spears as an accusation against Jesus made by J…F…K.
And then I will conquer God for himself, and then I will conquer himself for God, and then I will conquer the Jesus that is not here with us cause he runaway. I will conquer all of you for the power of MY cock!
I am a Japanese man…regardless of whether or not that is we-incarnation, and you are all my playthings. You’re all the sperm inside my dick! But I put my penis in his mouth at the moment? No. I cannot remember if I ever actually anally penetrated him. Okay? But I may not have! I put-I put my penis in his mouth! And so I will conquer! I will conquer you! I will conquer all of you! Stop making fun of me. I will conquer all of you stop making fun of me! I will conquer you all! All of you! I will stop at NOTHING! I will stop making fun of you for being losers when you stop making fun of me for being God!” yells JFK.
The song plays.
“And use.
Casi are used the last of people to Attacca because you are all putty in my hands. You are my playthings! I use you! I use the British against themselves. And I used all of you to say I am a big Tex. …I think her Mata? Nah…I think outside the box.
So…what I want is…to be like Chairman Mao, which in the entire universe is Chairman Jack Kennedy. Of THE UNIVERSE!
Is there for you like Sherman mall now? Nah! No…you understand! You are nothing compared to me.
I am God. I am the omnipotent creator of the universe. Why do I not recall how I made you all? Because they say Lacey stole that from me when I loved Lem Billings. …My father got her pregnant in Egypt. Ans he orgasm sound of a joiner historic for me…for my knowledge of the creation of the universe.
Before he have sex with her, he is with my friend FAUSTA! FAUSTA FUESTER!
I froze the filter! And I will explain to you all that sex does not matter…unless if it’s my penis…and that is the end of story.” says JFK.
The song ends.
“Thank you Katy Perry for helping the cause. You will be rewarded somehow if I am in a good mood!” says JFK.
“No. Sex isn’t a joke. That’s not the point of this blog.” says Lacey.
Later.
“I heard her channel man a deep voice 000 ice cream I have mannish, body and mannish chilling, and I come from lower class, but don’t worry I am sexy puppy kitten to you.” says a woman in Japan.
“No. She’s not Jack.” says God. “She’s not JFK.” says Jesus Christ. “I WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED!!! …She has never been Jack Kennedy. She is not JFK reincarnaed.”
Keen to Cross the Pond 
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