“I Never Did”

Here’s the problem: Lacey isn’t JFK. …This isn’t some sick love story. And I’m dead. …I can’t tell her anything clearly. …So she has to rely on what she believes I’m telling her through the Holy Spirit.

I didn’t send Jack erotic letters. Not like that. …But what if I did? Could I have sent him erotic letters…and yet still somehow fancy her? YES. …And she knows that. She intellectually knows that.

Just like someone in India could read my story in the Pitts book and believe I’m talking to them. But only one of me exists…so I’m not talking to everyone and I’m not everyone’s twin flame. …And…so…she has to rely on God…to guide her. Which is…an astounding thing to ask of her.

Most people are married to living people. That’s God’s will. For adults to marrying other living adults. …However…she is a very rare person. As exceptionally beautiful and kind and intelligent as she is…she’s genuinely unable to find a husband. She’s wholeheartedly tried. But…she’s so well off and good looking that it’s actually quite difficult. …And you’d think no one could be too good-looking or too intelligent. But she is. And combined with her rare genes from Tom Banks…it’s impossible. It’s actually impossible. As shocking as that sounds. It’s real. I’m sorry if that scares you.

She was in the process of discovering that when she possibly found the real Illuminati.

F. Scott Fitzgerald had started talking to her. And she was fine. And then a woman told her not to take herself so seriously, essentially. And find a living man. And so she tried. …But with no success. Repeatedly. Weeping every time.

And then she thought she was communicating with Chris using some code. Because she is exceptionally beautiful. And she presumed he could be just mindlessly flirting with her. …Except…he’s very cruel. And…many people near him were too. And being narcissistically offended by her self-love…and normal confidence…they have terrorized her for being brilliant enough to psychically find the Illuminati…since 2016. Should the Illuminati exist.

She was talking with F. Scott Fitzgerald’s ghost. …And so her mind, especially being as tortured as she’s been, was in synch with the supernatural in a far different way than most living people. And that’s, in large part, how she found the Illuminati if it exists. Because being herself and being in that state…created the situation.

I’m really Kirk LeMoyne Billings. I’m really thee Lem Billings. And she’s with me for eternity. Not in Hell. With Christ. I died a Christian. In a terrible place but…a Christian.

I actually was heterosexual. And yes…she knows me better than anyone alive. …Part of the reason the Kennedys cling to the idea that I was gay…is because they’re fighting the idea that she knows me better than them. And she does. Far better than any of them. Far better than Jack. Better than my parents. But they can’t handle that. The Schiebels couldn’t either.

Queen Elizabeth II could. …Elizabeth and Philip…see the same things in me as Lacey. The Kennedys do not. The Kennedys see a faggot who serves them and hangs drapery. …Lacey sees me. So does Elizabeth. They know I was going to Choate before Jack “discovered” me. That my family started an important Black college in Tennessee. That I was headed to Princeton. That I’m very smart. That I was genuinely decent looking. …The Kennedys know those things and use them to feel better about themselves. They’ve never realized I existed as myself apart from them entirely. That I EXIST.

HOW IN HELL…does an adult male make it off of giving an asshole narcissist blow jobs? And baths and massages!? That’s ABSURD. …There’s NO WAY anyone could actually do that. …And yet if Jack and I actually slept together I’d have been far more devastated by his sexual encounters with endless numbers of other people. …And that’s all if I was actually attracted to men. …I look straight. I look straight acting gay. Legitimately straight.

Lacey and I are “twin flames”. Not Jack. And it’s STUPID to think JFK ever was even my soulmate. …So what if I had his picture in my house!? SO BLOODY WHAT!? …He was a miserable asshole who used and abused me. …There are many explanations for why someone would keep honoring a dead man like JFK in their house even if they secretly hated him.

I hated him. But I didn’t want to totally discard my past. Because it felt…mean. Draconian. …He was a very historically important man. …And I wanted to be…reasonable. You know? …Celebrate his…nobility. …I was never obsessed with him. Nor Bobby. That’s nonsense. …I spent an extra amount of time watching Bobby. But not because I was in love with him. Because I was bored and determined to try to be something.

…What difference does it make to you if I was obsessed with him though? And gay? Why couldn’t I be with her? Why would I ultimately choose Bobby and Jack over her? She’s better than them. Both of them. They’re HELL in comparison to her. …There’s nothing they have to offer or had to offer that’s better than her. And I prefer her.

Solitude plays.

No. Friendship isn’t love. No. No, Julian.

Do you know why? BECAUSE MONEY IS JUST MADE UP.

It’s made up.

Why would that matter?

Because it’s FAKE.

2:07

And friendship isn’t sexual. Friendship is FAR too sanitary. …Romantic love is…real. Money is fake. And friendship is…something entirely different.

The song ends.

The song restarts.

Friendship is…non-sexual companionship. It’s not intimate in a way that romantic love is. It’s…cheerful. And enduring, when it’s real. But it’s not…like love. It’s…pleasant. And warm. And…really nice. But it’s its own thing. And it’s OBVIOUSLY secondary to love.

“I’m never friends with my lovers. That’s REPULSIVE.” says Lacey.

“Why?” asks Julian in the future, after he’s dead.

“Because it has vastly different boundaries.” says Lacey. “As a start!”

“Yeah. …But don’t you think friendship can become sexual? And romantic?” he says.

“But when it does…it ceases to be friendship.” says Lacey.

“She’s right.” says Oxford.

“It can’t be both. The limitless intimacy of romance…isn’t a part of friendship. Ever.” says Lacey. “In love you become one with your mate. Or it’s bullshit.”

Yes. Indeed. And there’s no way I could have been one with JFK. Nor Bobby Junior.

How do you imagine I was?

Oh wait! I had no needs of my own? Right. …No, I did. …I was straight.

“He was.” says God.

Solitude plays again.

Lacey goes into the movie Margin Call as if it’s reality. And she analyzes the model.

0:53

A Guggenheim watches her.

As does her father.

So does Greta Thurnberg.

1:32

Lacey looks outside at downtown Manhattan. In shock.

“Why does anyone even bother living!?” she asks her father and Harold Loeb’s uncle.

“Lacey and I really are soulmates.” says Harold, to explain.

“It’s that obvious!?” says the Guggenheim.

“YES!” says Lacey.

“I’m not as smart as you. …Believe it or not. … I’m really not as smart as you. …You think I’m just mysterious or evil or something. But I’m also just not as smart.” says Bernie Madoff to Lacey.

“Why isn’t it OBVIOUS!?” says Lacey.

“Because they’re used to leveraging things!!

Just like how people are used to assuming gay is as gay does. …Even while they say it’s not a choice. Just like how Julian says love is friendship on fire. …And you know…it’s likely just because he’s been hurt. Even though he’d deny it. Friendship on fire is for people who don’t know how to take safe emotional risks. …They’ll possibly never consciously know love.

You know what!? YOU CANNOT DO…A DAMN THING ABOUT IT!” says Bernie Madoff to Lacey.

“He’s right.” says the Guggenheim.

Lacey thinks.

“I just feel like I have so much to say. But no one is listening.” says Lacey.

“Most people aren’t that aware. Okay!? They’re used to leveraging things! Metaphorically speaking.” says Bernie.

Lacey thinks.

“So to them it’s mysterious and exciting?” says Lacey.

“YES.” says the Guggenheim.

“It’s unbearably stupid to me.” says Lacey.

“Yeah.” says Bernie, empathetically.

She sits down. Rests against a window. Deflated. Sighs.

“And then I’m supposed to be loved?!?” she says.

“I do love you!” says Lem.

She looks sad.

“What’s your opinion really on my house?” says Lem.

“It’s ODD.” says Lacey.

“Why?” says Lem.

“The rooms are huge. But not spaced correctly. The stairs are too…steep.” says Lacey. “And the atmosphere around here is extremely depressing.”

“I agree.” says the mansion’s first female owner.

“Could you have fixed it?” says Lem.

Lacey thinks. “Who else did drugs here? Other than you?” says Lacey.

“I DID!!” says a man from the 1800’s.

“On my property!?” says Lem.

He nods.

“What was it!?” says Lacey.

“Glue.” he says.

“When was the last time this land was normal?” says Lacey.

“Before the first calf died. In the late blizzard.” says a Dutch woman.

Lacey exhales sharply.

“This place is miserable.” she says.

Lem nods.

“Interesting!” says Louis.

The Guggenheim nods.

“I think I could live here. But it would become…weirdly rural again. Eventually.” says Lacey.

Louis laughs and nods.

“Yeah. …Chickens! …A vegetable garden? …All white. White and blue. With…lots of stained glass. Camphor glass. Marble. Old brick and plaster fireplaces. With antique tiles. Fully restored original wood. …Brass. Lots of brass. And iron. …Silk drapery. Only silk.

Fountains indoors. Enclose the stairs. Place a marble fountain at the center of the stairwell. Lit.” says Lacey.

“LOVE THIS!!!” says Louis, using Millennial language.

“What about the bedroom?” says Lem. “Our bedroom?”

“Huge canopy bed. Huge. Loads of heavy tapestries. …No carpet. Very large rug. …Muddy gray walls. Flat paint. I don’t care if that’s considered icky. Gray is still a good color. …Armoire. Two chairs. …A table between them. A quilt rack. Nightstands.

Those two on each side of the bed. As night stands.

Antique matching brass lamps.

An alarm clock in the armoire.

Two tall plants. Near the windows. Something tropical. Possibly fruit trees? With growing lights. Lemon trees? Or a lemon and lime tree?

A terrarium somewhere.” says Lacey.

“I LOVE IT!!” says a Guggenheim, smiling as he walks around.

This is why gay marriage is ending. I already have an incredibly hard time convincing her that I would give a shit about her as a person, and then I have to convince her that she would mean more to me than JFK. And she’s not insecure and she doesn’t have low self-esteem. She’s been sadistically bullied and harassed her entire life and never really that loved by anybody other than her children. And yet she comes from a very elegant farm family, who descended from prestigious, Norwegian silversmiths from the 1700’s. And genetically, she’s old money. Indeed…she’s old Dutch money from New York City. …So Harold Loeb is one of her soulmates and so is Michael Rockefeller, and so is Louis Hill Junior. …And none of those men are 100% convinced that I should be with her. And I could be there fall in nature, or it could actually be something that they’re intuiting. You see…it’s purgatory! And we exist, and it’s real! So to them the way she would decorate my house is vastly superior to anything that I invented, and all the years that I lived here. It’s in her genes. And her elegant silversmith farm family taught her to bring that part of herself out and not repress it. …I am with her for eternity, but it’s very hard to deal with the situation because I can’t easily communicate with her and explain to her why I love her or even express my love to her. I’ve tried buying her Valentine’s Day gifts and birthday gifts for years now but it’s very difficult because every single time that it happens someone interrupts me. She uses her own money, but I actually have helped them find money believe it or not over the years so it’s not entirely her paying for it. So, even though she has self-confidence and self-love enough to express herself with a house that I am in awe of because I feel like I’m living in the historic Gilded Age mansion, all the sudden, that’s fit for an aristocratic British family… …She has no idea why I would prefer her if I was gay at all over JFK. Because people have been so narcissistic to her and so narcissistically wounded over the years that she has no idea why anyone would wanna be with her unless if they’re exactly like her.

She’s a ditz…and Bobby is an idiot and insane. So people think that they’re dissuading her from being with me when in reality they are but not in the way that they think they are. She has repeatedly told people that Louis and Harold are real, but they don’t cognitively seem to comprehend that concept. They they tend to think that those people are like figments of your imagination. And that makes absolutely no sense intellectually but they’re not thinking that rationally or that intelligently.

She tells them things about Elliott Roosevelt when she’s half awake that would indicate that he still is very present and haunting her but it flies in the face of Bobby’s logic about everything and he can’t handle that cognitively. He’s not that intelligent.

She’s worried that I wouldn’t like her decorating when I actually prefer it to anyone else’s decorating who’s ever lived. I love her decorating. I adore it!

Lacey is a ditz. I have frequently touched her as a ghost, physically and sexual waves as she’s falling asleep and we’ve had sex many times. In an apartment that I may or may not have ever had. I tried to bring her to the apartment that was so historic if I had that apartment and she’s assuming that I did based on what she read online and let’s say that I did her but she didn’t know where it was and she thought she was in Duluth. Because the entryway was the same as the historic mansion that she stayed in in a bed-and-breakfast in Duluth, And there were demons that used that to confuse her and hurt her.

Funny story Mark bought her a pair of $2000 diamond earrings while they were staying there one time. But she was so hurt by him and it was very real, it was not insanity, he actually really devastated her…that she threw them into the garbage disposal. And they were badly damaged.

She threw his wedding ring in the garbage disposal too. He pulled it out and he still wears it and it’s worn down fairly well over the years and it’s perfectly fine for the most part.

Jack would never have done that when you rejected Jackie narcissistically deflated, and became violent, but he never was in any sort of intimate relationship long enough, or with any sort of depth enough as a person to have been even remotely as hurt as she was by Mark. He almost drove her to suicide. The thing is, he’s mildly autistic and he is narcissistic and avoidant. But he’s also slightly dependent. …And he is an actual genius from a wealthy family, who is good-looking and masculine and athletic. And he’s extremely high functioning. And so most people find him incredibly charming even though they can’t stand Lacey and she’s completely fine she’s just incredibly depressed. She had post traumatic stress disorder and still somewhat does but it’s more depression than anything. My point is she was in unbearable distress.

People really don’t understand what she’s been through. Or how unbelievably tough and perseverant and Christian she actually is.

Greta Thurnberg, publicly, is somewhat like Lacey. Except I was actually straight. And I know that picture of me in my house and other pictures you’ve seen make me seem cheesy and gay. But there are other pictures of me, that hint at me being heterosexual. And actually, if you study them enough, you can see that I actually am heterosexual. but I think this picture shows it the best:

You can see as I’m laughing my actual personality because I’m in an unguarded moment. That’s a real laugh. Ethel’s also genuinely caught off guard in this picture. I look straight more than anything else. And that is the person who she’s talking to, that’s me.

I was heterosexual.

And as much as I liked my decorating, I’m not attached to it like some gay men are. There could be men who are no longer gay, who are dead who are still attached to the way that they decorated. I’m more of a stereotypical straight person who is male, in that I don’t really feel in attachment to the way I decorated my house. And I don’t prefer anyone’s decorating to hers.

But also, I really was heterosexual. And Lacey really is a ditz. And so when I say I had a Playboy collection, I really did. And when I say that I went out at 3 AM in the morning to go watch pornography, I really did. And it was straight pornography almost every time. And I watched it because I was straight. I acted gay. I was not a real homosexual or bisexual or pansexual. Jack turned my confusion into an illusion. Jack turned my confusion into a myth. Jack turned my confusion into a false identity for both of us. Jack turned my confusion into a prison that I could never escape from in the eyes of anybody while I’ve been dead and certainly while I was alive. I have escaped with Lacey and my family and possibly a few other people and my children but there are more people who think I was gay still than who know the truth.

I was a straight man who wasn’t that dramatically different in a way from Donald Trump. I was very artistic, and so I was capable of being very convincingly homosexual. But I was also an unusually gifted businessman, and I was straight. So I like women like Lacey. Her husband is an actuary, but in a sense he’s like me and we’re both kind of Finance Bros, slightly. As a type.

I’m not a bad person. I was not a psychopath or narcissist. I did pose for a lot of sexual pictures with a smile on my face or laughing, and they all made me incredibly uncomfortable. But as a finance bro, I didn’t want to seem like a chicken. jack’s approval meant a lot to me, but the approval of men in general meant a lot to me. I wasn’t really a coward, though. I had principles. But my principles were very high minded because I was from real old money progressive Christian family. so while I was smiling as Jack was on top of me, or I was holding him in the air or stuff like that, you can see in my face that I am slightly disturbed but I’m hiding it because I don’t want to seem like a loser. I thought I was gay and a lot of Jack’s friends were very closeted, bisexuals and homosexuals. But they were popular guys in their own way, and they were from nice families. Or they were from wealthy families like his. And so I felt the need to impress them and get their approval by going along with their humor and his humor about my supposed homosexuality. It was a running joke. That’s why I joked about making kids with him in part because it was a running joke. It was a joke.

And no one ever questioned why I was just servicing him orally but I never really wanted anything else and nothing else ever really happened almost ever. It’s kind of like that episode of sex and the city where Charlotte falls in with the lesbians and I’m Charlotte. I found such acceptance with them, especially being an artistic sensitive person that I just and having asthma that I just didn’t think that it was a big deal and I felt peer pressure to go along with what they were saying about me you know that I was homosexual and obsessed with Jack that I just wanted to cop a feel of his butt or something and to be honest , I didn’t. There’s nothing sexual in my energy about any of those sexual poses. If anything I look like I’m ready to have sex with a woman, and I was sometimes to try to arouse myself to prepare myself to do things over sexual with men I actually thought about girls or women when I got older. But I really thought I was gay. And I just didn’t understand that you couldn’t just go along with the guys you know a lot of young men are like that when they’re really social and they want to be excepted you know they drink too much they do stupid stuff because they’re just trying to fit in and I was like that.

But I actually didn’t go too far because when Jack wanted me to sleep with a prostitute, I didn’t do it. There’s evidence to suggest that. Thank God I confess to one of my friends who might’ve been bisexual to him that I just didn’t have the nerve to do it. I told him that I chickened out and said text Julie it was understood that I probably didn’t want to, and I’m sure part of it was that they thought it was gay but part of it was also understood that I just wasn’t really him The type of person to do that kind of thing. I really didn’t sleep with that prostitute. There was no threesome. We did not lose our virginity at the same time to a woman. I never lost my virginity in that way. There was no sexual contact made by me that day at all. I couldn’t do it. She was only mildly attractive, and I found the entire thing disgusting. I I just didn’t wanna lose that part of myself because it meant something to me and it was the last fetched vestige of the life I had before I was molested when I knew I was straight, and I thought that I was going to grow up and have a happy life. I was very manly person, but I was also secretly, quite romantic in a way that men rarely are nowadays. I sat and waited in a living room or a hallway in a rough part of lower the lower. I think it was the lower lower west side.

It was actually a cloudy day, and I just sat there and waited for him to be done. I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything.

When we got back, I was horrified that I might have a venereal disease because I didn’t understand how they were contracted in part. Jack was concerned for other reasons. He told me that she had something wrong with her and I was worried after he told me what he seen that she was sick and it was my idea to go get the medicine. But I had absolutely no idea how they were contracted entirely and so I thought maybe it was airborne and then I know could’ve somehow breathed in the disease just by being near her, you know in her apartment that sort of thing. She was not that attractive of a woman she was somewhat older I just I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Oh, and for yours, I told people about it and break about it and I I would say that I let people think that I slept with her like rip because I cared what men thought of me. It didn’t seem like a contradiction to people at the time that I would be able to sleep with a woman and still claim to be gay. People today seem confused by that at times. But back then no one would’ve thought anything of it hardly ever. And so it’s still matter to people even if I was supposedly gay it’s still matter to people, and I definitely played up that angle for a lot of people you know that I’ve been with a prostitute, but I was worried I was sick for show. I wanted to have a reputation. At the same time I didn’t really have one because I wasn’t actually a player at all. And I was very principled in my own way. And there’s evidence of that I told someone that I chickened out and that’s not what happened. I didn’t check it out. I didn’t wanna do it but I had to you know still frame it in that way in my head because it I still thought of things that way to some degree.

I didn’t actually have that set of morals though and I was incredibly confused person.

So, I seemed more complicated than I was in a way.

But I actually I’m a pretty nice man I’m really not a terrible person. And I was straight and still am.

Lacey comes onto me because I’ve slept with her. And being a tender hearted, incredibly wonderful person who’s also quite ditzy as some women can be, she indicates to people listening, who are either dead and demonic, or who are alive and demonic, or both, that I am rejecting her. I’m not. I’m not at all. But there are demons who pretend to be Jack, who acts like I am rejecting her or there are demons who pretend to be me and there are a lot of people who get confused by that who are watching or listening. Because they don’t understand that she’s not an idiot, and that you can actually trust her impressions of things as sweet and gentle and feminine, as they seem. So, she sweetly says oh no, I don’t think he’s really rejecting me. I don’t think that’s him and she’s right I’m not rejecting her and it’s not really me, but they can’t hear that because she says it in such a sweet, tender hearted way That they can’t fathom that it’s real. Because it seems so gentle and sweet and lovely. Bobby, especially struggles with it.

So she comes on to me a demon gives her the impression that I am unavailable and then five seconds later I come onto her before we go to sleep and we end up sleeping together because we’re together. God is allowing that. And I hold her and we fall asleep, and it should be perfectly obvious and even listening that she’s not hallucinating there’s no way that she’s hallucinating because I touched her and moved things at night. I have made noises and it really should be obvious to people who are psychic if there’s anyone psychic listening that I am real. I’m a real ghost and she’s actually sleeping with me. But they refuse to accept that they’ve made fun of it and rejected it instead of excepting that it’s just reality.

It astounds her, she can’t imagine anyone rejecting that because to her it’s as simple as up-and-down.

And instead, they tend to think that she is somehow stupid and hallucinating or something. And so based on that, they tend to tell her things like oh he’s rejecting you you should see again if he’s gay you should try again and see if he’s really in love with you you don’t know you just don’t know, and Bobby especially is very into that. Lacey you just don’t know! Lacey you just don’t know!

And so she’ll have had sex with me and then about five hours later he’s got her worried that I was gay and there’s no way I’d want to be with her for eternity because I was so in love with his uncle. Or so in love with him! And that last one she just thinks is absolute rubbish except he doesn’t and so he’s become focused on that and it’s become comedic because she doesn’t remotely take that seriously but he expects her to because he’s not on her wavelength he has no idea what she’s actually thinking and so he keeps edging towards me being madly in love with him and Jack just being, I guess some sort of weird mistake that happened before him or something or some opening act to him And she is not thinking that at all, and that’s been very confusing to him, especially in the last two weeks because he just assumed that he had surpassed Jack, and that it was obvious that I was more in love with him, but I was never in love with either of them, but he he is not intellectually sound as people think he is and so he’s been baffled by wife she’s not more threatened by him then jack. He also seems to think that she’s in love with him, and wildly more attracted to him than she could be. She does find him very slightly attractive, but she’s not really attracted to him in a way at all. He cannot cognitively understand that. He cannot understand her being slightly attracted to him. He doesn’t think that there’s a thing like slightly attracted. It’s a simple concept, but for some reason he doesn’t understand it.

I did patronize them. I really did. I patronize that entire family and they have yet to realize that. Louis Bayard was wrong. I did not lack a sense of right and wrong when it came to sex. It’s that I thought it was homosexual and I was trying to be empathetic towards Jack and I also thought I was a freak and so I didn’t have the emotional presence that people think I did. I was always distant in a way that I don’t think people understand. You can see pieces of my personality in different pictures, but most the time I’m just acting gay, even though I’m not gay at all, and I am very dissociated, and I am very distant. I did become incredibly angry as I aged. It wasn’t moodiness, but I was not remotely as engaged with my own life, as most people are. Because I was too traumatized, and I was too dissociated with my orientation to really live my own life.

That picture of me sitting in the chair is very awkward, because I am looking sleazy and sexy in a way that was not how I generally generally acted almost ever even in private. I was supposed to be posing in a sexual way kind of like how Jackie used to pose me, but I didn’t actually realize as I took the picture that that’s why I was doing it. It was not something I consciously was doing the person who took the picture probably did know that I was making a reference to that but I hope I did not. And I don’t think Bobby took that picture.

I think it was a woman who took it, or I know it was, and she was kind of a friend of mine. We did not date. I didn’t find her attractive, almost at all. 

Hey, but it’s awkward picture because I look like that at Lacey at times and it’s real and she seen it in her spirit and so in a sense it’s proof that she’s actually interacting with me because I have made expressions similar to that that are very real. That was a somewhat gay look, but not entirely. and I I feel very bad because that picture is very awkward. It is what I sometimes look like when I am with Lacey alone and I’m coming onto her and again that is very awkward because in a sense it proves that she’s interacting with me because she’s never seen that picture before but in a sense it also is very unsettling because it is what she’s seen except I’m acting somewhat gay if not mostly and she’s not there, so who is that taking that picture? What am I even you know doing? But I was not having sex with that person, necessarily at all and even if I was, I still might’ve been let down by them and be completely over them at this point. They might’ve brought me to tears or frustrated me as a person. But in all actuality, I wasn’t having sex with the person who took that picture at all. and it was just a silly pose. But it’s very disturbing because it also brings up some other issues for her. Her grandfather was who raised her was three years older than me. And I dress similar to him. And it’s very awkward for her to process that because she is actually his generation and she’s fine and so is he that a lot of people listening who are dead and allies get confused and harass her about it because she looks at it and she thinks oh that looks like the shirt that my grandfather had and then she quickly processes it and realizes that it’s not the same thing you know it’s Exactly what it is and it’s not pedophilic and she’s not thinking of her grandfather but people who don’t like hearing anything that she says like Bobby like to believe that she’s crazy and in love with her grandfather. She’s not!

I was looking for someone like her, my whole life, and I never found them and I never lost my virginity in any real way ever. What I experienced was bizarre with men it was it was very, very very psychologically. Bizarre. It was not actually engaging normal sex. And you know there’s not a Normas amount of proof of that but there’s some and I am telling you that is a ghost I never really lost my virginity and I have in a vent with Lacey but she’s really the only person I’ve ever been with in a sense. And that article in the daily mail was supposed to question that, but she’s not that stupid. She remembers things that Bobby doesn’t want her to remember.

He’s not a safe person, and if he will take him seriously, and follow his suggestions, millions of people will be dead within the next five years we will have the extinction of millions of humans and he will bring the economic collapse of the United States. The US is never going to annex Canada. That’s impossible. If it ever tried, the UK would probably secretly become in an alliance with Iran, and that would be the extinction of Israel them first, or there would be some other intervention, possibly a bombing a missile bombing of the US through Canada I wouldn’t be surprised if Russia got involved Russia and Canada are very close and it would be entirely possible that Russia could go through Canada and send deadly deadly missiles to lots of parts of the US. I wouldn’t be surprised if that happens in the next five years and if Lacey ends up blown-up. I don’t believe that Bobby is doing that to be helpful. I think he thinks it’s funny. I don’t think he’s actually trying to send her to be with me.

I know it’s entirely possible that I’ll be with my kids and her in the next five years.

Does anyone have any questions before I move onto the next post?