I think the entire premise of the “Lem & Jack” mythology…rests on Lem being a horny toady…and Jack being a narcissistic but…TOTALLY INNOCENT and…TOTALLY asexual…heterosexual. As in…Lem violently sexually assaulted him…BUT without being violent. So…somehow…Lem convinces Jack to have gay sex…and Jack goes along with it because he’s HORNY and MANLY and WOW…it’s Jack Kennedy but…Jack IS NOT gay. At all. Because…Jack is JACK KENNEDY. And Jack Kennedy was the most virile, straight, handsome, sexy, amazing, brilliant, brave, courageous, AMAZING US President EVER. HE WAS SO SOOOO STRAIGHT!
Truthfully Elliott Roosevelt was straight. There were many Greatest Generation men who were straight. …But Jack Kennedy was not one of them.
My Trigger by Miike Snow plays.
And an Irish man in Ireland who saw Lacey and Mark in Dublin at their hotel…listens. Why? Because he did NOT want Mark to marry her. …He had a horrible feeling about it…and frankly…he felt FATHERLY towards her. …”No! You will not marry him!” he felt like yelling at her. Why? Well…
“Mark is a Jew.” says F. Scott Fitzgerald. “And Lacey looks like Scotia.”
A Christian rolls his eyes.
“I said she looks like Scotia. …That could be her Norwegian blood. Vikings came down to Ireland and…had sex.” says Scott. “Regardless…they were fatherly.”
The song plays.
The song is backwards.
THE SONG IS BACKWARDS.
Later.
“Why are you provoking him to nuclear war? …So what you got a good shot!? …In this case it doesn’t matter.” says Lacey.
John Mearsheimer comforts Lacey.
“Lacey! …Vietnam. Social engineering. …America…is STOOPID. …We are dumb. …You can’t colonize a country…without colonization.” he says.
She thinks.
“We are DUMB.” he says. “I mean that colloquially.”
Time by Hans Zimmer plays.
“We don’t understand Russia, neither.” says Lacey.
“Yeah!” he says.
She cries.
Thinks.
“It’s so sad!” she says about America.
Later.
“WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?” yells Lacey at the Illuminati. “WHY!??”
Pool of Love as performed by Les Baxter plays.
“I am the reference.
Pool of Love is a reference to Jack Kennedy’s sexual activities in the White House pool. It’s sarcasm and irony and yet…also…something more.
Lacey is speaking truth.” says I, Lem Billings.
Breathe Your Name by Sixpence None The Richer plays.
“I’m sorry Lem.” says Lacey.
He laughs.
“There’s someone better for him. Really.” says Lem.
“He’s a hero.” says Lacey.
“Yes. Indeed.” says Lem. “But you belong to me.”
She looks disappointed.
He smiles.
“It’s me though.” he reminds her.
She blinks. Blinks again. “I don’t want to lose you!”
“YOU WON’T!” he says.
“Good.” she says with a sigh. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure where my brain is.”
“It’s going to be okay! …I’ll win you over. Fair and square! OR…I’m sure I’ll be quite happy!” says Vladimir Putin.
“Yes.” says Lacey. “I’m sorry. I’m being slow.”
“That’s okay. You’re with me. And we’ll sort it out!” says Lem. “But yes…of course you’re with me.”
Keen to Cross the Pond 