Casi IS FOR REAL, YO

Casi: See…THIS is old money.

Anderson Cooper: We don’t even own that anymore. …And it’s newer than their house in Norway.

Casi: *Thinks*

Okay. But see…-

*She thinks*

They never owned The Breakers.

The Illuminati: $700,000,000.00 is enough to qualify as old money.

Casi: *Thinks*

Is it really though?

The IRS: YES!

Yes, it is.

Do you understand what a scale is?

Casi: Kinda?

Okay. So…they’re old money? But it’s not…at the top?

The Met: Yes.

Casi: So…okay.

Well…I’m not impressed.

*She looks totally unimpressed*

A dead Vanderbilt: Does The Breakers impress you?

Casi: No.

To be brutally honest? No.

*She shrugs and sips a soda from a fountain.*

YET ANOTHER DIFFERENT reader: So…what does impress you?

Casi:

A castle.

A historian: But Casi you weren’t the Queen of France.

Casi: See…-

In his heart…which is what MATTERS…I was.

And that’s what I got. The whole of FRANCE. Read it and WEEP.

A historian: But no.

Because why didn’t he marry you?

Casi: *Laughs*

I was above that.

A historian: No. Not true.

Casi: He would have married me.

A historian: Not true.

I’m sorry.

You were a high class whore.

Casi: He-

The time we shared…was OUT OF THIS WORLD.

I…had something REAL with him.

Louis of France: I did love you. Dearly.

But…I wouldn’t have married you. France was never yours.

Casi: *Shakes her head no*

Louis of France: We are both conniving…superficial jerks. And we understood each other, back then. …You accepted that. And…I fell in love with you.

Casi: HA!

So funny.

*She stares at him*

Louis of France: I do not like your American mannerisms.

Casi: Maybe I’m not even her.

Louis of France: So…-

What do you think happened? Regardless.

Casi: *Exhales sharply*

It’s…sex.

You lied about sex.

Louis of France: You think this is new information to me?

Casi: *Laughs*

You’re not real.

Men are never this smart!

Louis of France: No. I’m real.

What happened? In your estimation.

Casi: YOU…were possibly in love…with ME!?

Louis of France: It’s possible.

Casi: *Goes into shock*

Lacey: *rolls her eyes*

You used her for a time. And given the flaws of Western Society…you couldn’t be happy.

Louis of France: Yes.

Lacey: He was never going to marry you. But…that didn’t make him happy. Because he actually loved you.

Louis of France: Why couldn’t I marry her?

Lacey: Because…she wasn’t good enough. Simply put.

Louis of France: That was how we saw it.

Lacey: I’m just saying that. That’s how you saw it.

Casi: *Is in shock*

Louis of France: Did you forget this? Or never know it?

Casi: *Thinks*

But you loved me!??

Louis of France: If you’re Virginia? YES!

And you almost could be. Regardless.

Casi: Wow!!

*She laughs*

*She thinks*

See…so I have to impersonate Lacey. Because…y’all gonna come at me…if I don’t.

Louis of France: The very opposite is true!

Did you forget or never know?

Casi: I never knew.

Louis of France: So you’re not Virginia…or…you are too stupid to understand that intuitively, at the moment.

Are you an arrogant person? By nature?

Casi: Yes?

How could I have been okay with that!?

Louis of France: BECAUSE YOU UNDERSTOOD REALITY.

Casi: *Looks sad*

Louis of France: You were…brutally honest. At times. You were genuinely shocked I loved you at all. It caught you off-guard. For real.

Bobby: FUNNY!

*He forces himself to laugh*

Well…-

Louis of France: America ruined you.

Casi: Or I was never her.

You know what though? It’s nonsense!

Louis of France: No. The harsh realities of wealth and poverty are very real.

Bobby: Lacey! Are you eating another homemade caramel?

Am I reading you??!

Lacey: Yes.

Bobby: COOL!

What’s your recipe?

Louis of France: It’s America. You are way out of touch with reality.

Bobby: Condensed milk…?

Lacey: Yes.

Louis of France: Casi…you’re more than just a courtesan. You are mine. If you’re Virginia.

Casi: But how can I be yours…if I’m not good enough!?

Louis: I was not that good of a man. I confess.

But…-

It’s the fallen world. I could not risk it. I was weak. And stupid.

Casi: NO WAY!!!

*She cries*

Bobby: I made caramels. Tricked you!

I made them!

And I’m eating one right now!

Just like you!!!!

Lacey: Are they better or worse?

Bobby: Better, of course.

*He smirks*

Loser!

Casi: I AM…-

You still have a thing for me!??

Louis of France: Yes.

If you’re Virginia. And…even if you’re not…you should be careful. Because…you’re just as alluring. As yourself.

Casi: *Laughs*

Bobby: I AM BOBBY.

God: Who else would you be?

Bobby: A lot of other people.

*He thinks*

*Looks sad and hurt*

You all think I’m dumb?

The Illuminati: You are, sort of. I’m sorry.

Bobby: Okay.

I’m not.

Lem was gay…and he will prefer my caramels.

God: He was and is heterosexual.

Bobby: I made…better caramels. As a man would.

It’s NOT a competition.

Yes?

See…I’m parenting Lacey. I’m teaching her to be kind. Because…we can all lose. She will never have a man’s brain. …And my caramels…are proof.

God: Hers are better. She’s a much better cook. And interior decorator. Men do well…but…they’re never truly superior to women in general. At that. It’s not just a social construct, genetics are real. Learned-DNA is a thing.

Genitalia is real. Gender is real. Stop pretending you’ve been right. The science has NEVER been there. GROW-UP!

A masc lesbian: But then what am I?

God: A masculine lesbian. Or…a man? According to some? What do you think?

A masc lesbian: I’m a woman.

I’m just…really masculine.

God: Do you think you could be what they call non-binary?

A masc lesbian: I have wondered. To be honest.

*This person shrugs*

I…think…I’m…a woman. And…I just…am masculine.

God: *Sighs*

You’re a…non-binary person. Potentially? I’m sorry.

Do you have female genitalia?

A masc lesbian: I can’t stop…the manliness. I’ve tried.

…It’s just there!!!

And my wife loves it. *They roll their eyes*

She-

We’re probably pansexual.

Their wife: SHE IS MY WIFE!!!

A masc lesbian: *Laughs*

But you love that I’m…your husband, at times.

*She laughs*

Their wife: *Smiles*

Only because I trust that as a woman…you’re not a worthless piece of shit.

A masc lesbian: *Cries*

*Laughs*

*Smiles*

Their wife: You’re so beautiful to me.

A masc lesbian: *Nods*

I don’t enjoy that compliment as much as you.

Did you know that?

*They smile*

Their wife: NO! You’re so a woman!

*She almost looks scared*

A masc lesbian: What if…I love how you see me? And I don’t want you to stop seeing me? For who I really am?

Their wife: THEN GENDER IS NOT A THING!!!

A masc lesbian: No. You’re just convinced men all suck shit. And that I’m…not…physically masculine…and a good person too. But what if I’m an exception?

Their wife: And you love me?

A masc lesbian: YES!!!

Their wife: Sweetie…what happened to all the normal men?? You are more like you?!?

A masc lesbian: YEAH!!!

That’s what I’m worried about.

Their wife: *Smiles*

I love you regardless.

A masc lesbian: *Nods*

I’m just…thinking.

Their wife: Me too!

A masc lesbian: And we think together. As equals. *They smile*

A man: This is scary.

Why are we doing this conversation?

God: Yeah.

The possibility that there could be some mutation in gender?

Lacey is entirely female, of course. Lem was male.

Ahh…because Casi wanted to “keep it real”. She’s a provocateur.

Funny the perfume community never realized that?

Casi is a provocateur.

A man: Can we be done now?

God: YES. For now.

A man: GOOD!

It’s SATURDAY.

*He sighs and rolls his eyes*

*Later*

God: Atienza was a pretentious jerk. So was his wife. Very delusional people who took their modicum of wealth WAY too seriously. At Walmart. They irritated the black young woman. She’s- People like them are RUDE and delusional.

But…she didn’t handle it well. And neither did her parents. They’re…thugs. Violent beasts, who had their precious humanity stolen from them by American culture. They did evil…yes. But the culture itself is to blame as well.

Neither party was entirely innocent. The Atienzas were culturally duped as well.

The sad truth is…the world is becoming sharply divided by social class. The Illuminati completely messed-up.

In a better store…they’d have just ignored each other. They all had real love for their families, tragically.

Casi…do you shop frequently at Walmart?

Casi: Yes.

God: This is actually very serious.

The evil being thrown at Lacey by evil people…is very evil. And…it manifested at the State Fair. And in a Walmart. That man…looks like Lem. But…that young woman was angry for reasons that Lacey gets angry.

Lem was straight. Lacey is…righteously angry.

But…it’s not real. It is real…but…she’s not trying to bulldoze JFK. And Lem isn’t defending his beloved wife JFK. And Lem’s not short and Asian. And Lacey’s not Black.

They can’t make it manifest. With her. It’s not real.

And…it manifested with Casi…in a sense. But…not in any way that would harm her. Because they need her. To keep up their lies.

But…that’s not going to keep working. And no member of the Illuminati, including famous chefs…can contact her. Poison her.

Lady Gaga can’t marry Minnesota. And win.

They’re out of their egotistical minds.

And…it’s about to get ugly. Outside Walmart.

Because Atienza was a Christian. And he was NOT supposed to die. It was NOT his time yet.

Things are WAY off the rails.

Jim: Were they ever illuminated?

God: Yes! It wasn’t me. But, yes. They were geniuses. It was real, in a way.

Jim: That’s sad.

God: Yeah!

Casi: Will Casi be okay?

God: No. She will be if she stays in me, through Christ. But…like many others…she will put herself in harms way, otherwise.

A Christian: So Lacey’s not that evil?

God: Correct.

A Christian: What’s going to happen to Casi!?

God: What could happen to you?

A Christian: I’m not worried about me. I’m worried about that poor woman named Casi who she’s writing about…

God: Why not you?

An American Christian: She got clobbered! Poor woman!

She’s just a poor woman from Kentucky. And all she wanted to do was go on Instagram…and make a difference in her own life.

God: Go on?

An American Christian: She bought…Chanel No. 22…to make a point.

God: Which was what?

An American Christian: That…”SHE AINT NO DIFFERENT.”

God: Huh.

But she’s very different. And you both know that.

An American Christian: I’m her…-

See…-

I have…-

She is not different. I am a Muslim.

God: No, you’re not.

Why are you suddenly trying to be Muslim?

An American Christian: Because this isn’t right.

You can’t tell me…that you’re born into poverty…and we’re supposed to recognize that?!?

God: But that is reality.

An American Christian: No.

*They shake their heads no*

When I walk into the town diner…and I sit down…and I eat a piece of pie and coffee…because that’s all I can afford…I am not going to admit to being poor.

God: Why?

An American Christian: Because in all honesty…I’m a billionaire. In reality. That’s my TRUE identity. And I make sure people know that…everywhere I go.

I AM A ROCKEFELLER KENNEDY VANDERBILT ASTOR.

Yes, I am.

So you BETTER treat me that way!!! OR ELSE!!

God: But that only means something if you are.

And you’re not.

An American Christian: I’m-I’m not different. I am those people!!!

People just don’t know.

BUT I AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God: No. You’re not.

An American Christian: I AM!!!!

God: No. You’re not.

Why do you need to be that?

An American Christian: Because I’m standing-up for Casi. I’m standing-up!

God: No. You’re losing your mind.

An American Christian: I am…-

I am…-

Look…if I’m not a billionaire…then why…can’t I walk into Walmart…and find what I’m looking for? It’s suspicious.

*They smirk*

Everything is overpriced.

Ha!

I can tell…the Illuminati…is after my family money.

God: That’s information the Holy Ghost was trying to give you about another Christian you should be praying for. How can that be about you?

An American Christian: I don’t know.

*They look confused*

*They pause and think*

But why would the Illuminati want to attack…a real wealthy family? Doesn’t that seem weird?

Another Christian: Because they’re CHRISTIANS.

An American Christian: *looks stunned*

I’m listening to the Holy Spirit!!!

God: Actually, right now, Bobby is using fallen angels of false light to fool you. He’s talking to you, not me.

Bobby: Uses demons to whisper lies about Lacey to the woman.

An American Christian: *Thinks*

I’m not a lesbian.

God: Neither is Lacey!

An American Christian: But the Kennedys are so nice!

That’s one of the first things I thought about.

I’m here shopping in Walmart. For creamed corn. And…it’s like…I’m having a conversation with God…about the Kennedys.

*She smiles fondly*

Jonah: Do you need to stop and pray? And ask God if it’s Him?

An American Christian: No.

Because it’s just a silly conversation in my head!

God: Demons do that. I do that. You’re right. That’s your spirit.

They’re talking to your spirit.

But…you’re having a harder than usual time filtering out the demonic. Any idea why?

An American Christian: I’m mad.

*She almost cries*

I have $300,000.00 left. And I’m 78. And my husband…-

*She cries*

God: Did you know that you were poor!?

An American Christian: *Thinks, stunned*

WHAT!?

God: I do tell people not to get into usury.

I’m very gracious.

But…this is what can happen.

You were fooled. You got into massive debt. But you didn’t notice. Because you kept it at bay.

Now…you have $300,000.00. That’s good. Actually. That’s not bad! But…you are in trouble.

An American Christian: How do I live off $300,000.00??

God: Yeah.

Can you live with your son? In his basement?

An American Christian: I CANNOT DO THAT!!

God: Why?

It’s a nice basement. You could spend very carefully. And help, around the house.

An American Christian: *Looks flustered*

I can’t do that!

God: Why!?

An American Christian: Because!!!

I’m not prepared for that. I’m an independent woman!

I’ve been to Europe. I’ve been to South America. …I’ve been to THE MIDDLE EAST.

I…am…an adult.

*She shakes her head no*

I feel bad for the people in my situation who don’t even have that option. But…- *She looks off* I’m…old money. I’m going to make it.

God: How?

An American Christian: I have…-

I’m going to…-

I will be…-

*Shakes in fear*

I will be…-

I will live…with my church friends. My real family.

God: In your car?

An American Christian: No!

*She laughs*

God: You do have a good car!

An American Christian: *Laughs and nods, haughtily*

I am rich.

*She laughs*

Yeah. I’m rich!

What a joke this is! See…people like Lacey-

*She shakes her head in disgust*

They’re wrong!

This country…is-

*she shakes her head in disgust*

I am…a real rich person. …And…people like her…will be in for A RUDE awakening someday when they find out what is really happening right now in America.

A masc lesbian: Huh.

Like what’s going to happen?

An American Christian: Well!

*She smiles, fondly*

Gosh! You’re such a nice person.

It’s too bad she doesn’t appreciate that sort of thing. Only cruelty.

*She exhales sharply*

Well…I guess we’ll just…see her in a car. Living homeless.

A masc lesbian: Oh wow!

Because of like…Survival of the Fittest?

An American Christian: Yes!

See, you’re into science.

So am I!

*she smiles to herself*

I do think that’s just reality.

*She smirks*

No, she’ll be living in her car.

Their wife: When?

An American Christian: When?

Their wife: Yes.

An American Christian: Ahh…tomorrow.

She’s POOR!!!

*She falls apart, crumbling into tears.*

SHE IS! She’s POOR!!!!

*She almost looks to be throwing a tantrum.*

A Pastor: What if mom isn’t wrong?

An American Christian: *Laughs, manically*

NO WAY!!!

My mom is-

God bless her…but they are idiotic.

*she scoffs*

A Pastor: But you’re going to have to live in your car.

An American Christian: *Walks out of Walmart, oddly smiling*

No.

*She laughs*

I’m just going to have be as frugal as my mom.

*She smiles*

God: Is it a little late for that!?

An American Christian: *Thinks*

*Pulls out of Walmart*

Well-

They lived through the Great Depression!

*She thinks*

I really think it can be done!

God: You need to consider living in your son’s basement.

An American Christian: *Looks mad, pulling through the red light, accidentally, but safely.*

Well…-

Man!

*Sniffles*

*Turns on the radio and gets lost in driving.*

A Pastor: Is she in any danger of living in her car?

God: No!

That’s not Lacey. That woman is both projecting her own failings and fears on to Lacey…and…she’s determined to be happy. And to her happiness is Lacey being evil and eventually being made poor.

Lacey’s not evil. …And actually, she wishes that woman well. Genuinely.

Casi, did you know she was a good person? Lacey? But you just felt too sorry for yourself?

Casi: Yes.

God: *Nods*

So does that woman, but not as much. You lied. A lot of people in the perfume community did!

And…unfortunately, that woman isn’t as…aware.

Casi: Why did they fall for it?

God: She’s naive.

You are poor.

And that woman can’t handle that you, as poor as you are, could be that evil. It’s astounding to her. Because she was taught to hate rich people, in situations like this, blindly.

It works…mostly. But…people have made some horrible mistakes over the years. And this is…-

They “Can’t understand it!”. They just “…can’t understand it!”

Casi: *Laughs*

Why?

God: It’s what I said.

They can’t believe a richer person would be that victimized. It’s not a thing in their narrative.

*Later*

Lacey: I’m not a bad person!!!!

God: I know.

But they just can’t handle it. Your frugality…in that community…was NOT well received.