Lacey listens to “Closing Time” by Semisonic. Her husband and her discuss how Millennials have…innate skepticism about marriage. And how they view hooking-up as…a viable alternative? Or did. And then…got married…when they were wanting to. Not…with the idea of it being permanent from the beginning.
Lacey: I don’t experience this. At all.
My head…never grasped this concept.
Because sex…is never temporary. That’s biologically impossible.
It can be willfully forgotten. It can be…flawed and icky. Or so…bad…that you forget. But…it’s inherently permanent.
A Millennial chef: You know, actually she’s right.
Lacey: It’s just like that.
It’s like spice. Or salt. You can’t actually get rid of it. It alters things…
A Millennial chef: Do you think you give pieces of yourself away?
Lacey: *thinks*
Not permanently, if you find the right person to reclaim them. You do…share something with your partner that’s…never going to be unsaid…even if you can find a way to explain yourself or explain your way out.
Like, “I didn’t want to say that to you, given what I know now. I spoke too soon.”
And your relationship with the other person is…permanently altered. Even if it can be redeemed.
It’s…always there. Like your other serious choices. Even on a subconscious level. It informs you. For good and bad ends, potentially.
But…you can recover, eventually. Even if it’s in death.
A Millennial guy: Are you always this serious?
Lucille Ball: WE ALL WERE.
And it’s perfectly normal.
Lacey: Yes! I am.
Elliott: So am I.
One of Lacey’s neighbors: Are you angry?
Lucille Ball: *rolls her eyes*
Are you?
One of Lacey’s neighbors: No.
Lacey: OH REALLY!?
There’s nothing your angry about at all right now?
One of Lacey’s neighbors: *rolls her eyes*
No.
*she laughs*
Lacey: Then how am I supposed to answer this question!?? *she says, desperately annoyed*
One of Lacey’s neighbors: That’s not what I meant.
Lacey: What do you mean? *she says, gently*
Lucille Ball: She means…in some…public relations type of way.
Lacey: What!?
Lucille Ball: Yeah.
Like…you’re coming across as angry…
Lacey: But I’m not? Right?
Lucille Ball: Are you kidding me!?!
*she laughs at the people who have thought that about Lacey*
Lacey: Well I am angry about a lot. You know how they’re always talking about repressed feelings?
One of Lacey’s neighbors: Oh fuck! She thinks I’m talking about repressed emotions!?!
Lucille Ball: Yes!
No, I don’t think so.
It’s something obvious.
Lacey: *devastated*
What the HELL!?
I’m not angry at all!
Lucy: I know.
I feel hurt for you. It’s been a sick personal attack since day one with you and all of these trolls. Calling themselves women. Ha!
Some of them are just lesbian incels, who realize you’d never fuck them, and can’t handle it.
Lacey: What can they possibly be thinking!?!
You don’t attack another adult that way. That’s incredibly destructive! It’s like they’re obsessively infantilizing me .
A woman who did that to her:
But then that just means that everything I pretend to be is what she really is…and I’m just sort of a dumbass, lesbian, middle class troll. And then I’m really not that big of a deal. I’m just sort of an idiot. And I can’t handle that, because I’m an egotistical idiot…and I don’t know how to handle things.
*awkward pause*
One of Lacey’s neighbors: OK, but are we even talking about the same thing the fact that she’s not really necessarily a millennial is actually kind of a big deal and I can understand that but I’m not sure if everyone else can.
She’s living near a university in St Paul and there are a lot of very intelligent people in her community. And so I actually find it fascinating to think about changes and interpersonal dynamics over the last hundred years OK but that’s a real discussion that we’re having right now so I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I’m not really feeling that.
I don’t think I’ve made that mistake where I would be dumb if I’m wrong about who she is.
I don’t know what you came up with, but that’s not what I would be experiencing.
I mean, there’s different people she’s channeling right now in the neighborhood but at least a few of them don’t feel stupid. I think they just feel confused.
Because what the hell is she even thinking?
*she laughs*
I’m not laughing at her and an unloving way it’s more how I would laugh at my own parents or grandparents even. I have no idea what they were thinking at times.
her gardening is interesting to me. I think she’s been trying to fit in with us and we’ve done some offensive things over the years. And I don’t think that we meant to be quite as violent as we were. But I think to someone like her what we did was a lot more serious than how we meant it.
And I think she put a lot more thought into things than we realized because that whole generation was like that they were not as stupid and slow and childish as you want them to be and I mean that I feel insulted you by people now because I’m a boomer you don’t understand them. OK you don’t understand us. I’m not defending everything we’ve done. We’ve made some pretty big mistakes. OK but you really don’t understand the other generation as well as you think you do and then you start going full speed in your analysis of them and you make mistakes.
I think that my generation assumed that her generation because that’s obviously real. I think people are very backward when it comes to evolution and their understanding of the sort of thing so I’m not even gonna go there, but I don’t I don’t think we’ve ever really acknowledged that our parents had sex I think we lived in denial of that because they were trying to be respectful of boundaries. And that’s perfectly fine but then because of the nature of this country and our culture, we never realized that they were just normal like we are and it never really occurred to us that they had a very different experience than the one that we had growing up that their lives were very different, but it wasn’t just a social construct. It was innate
I am so sick of people saying things are social construct. They’re not. I know too much about biology and genetics. I mean we’re talking about gardening yeah some things are just there. OK we are animals like birds and flies and there are certain things that we don’t have control over not everything is a construct.
Some things are just inherently biologically how we’re made they’re permanent
And so we may have souls we may have spirits. I’m not actually sure that we don’t. I actually wonder sometimes animals do but we don’t we don’t exist just in that way we have a mortal body. 
So I’m thinking in that sucks I’m thinking about the fact that this poor woman has lived a very lonely life incredibly mind blowing alone potentially and probably no one has had sympathy for her because they don’t even know that that’s what she’s experiencing.
I worry that we’re being competitive and we need to stop OK we admire her generation. We admire her and that’s wonderful but instead of seeing that as some sort of spark for a fight or some sort of competition, you need to stop and see it as art or music because this isn’t a competition that’s insane. You’re competing against yourself. You’re competing against biology itself. You’re competing against mother nature. You can’t win this is stupid.
Why was that generation more serious? I don’t know. Ask their parents right I don’t know that those people her father amazes me that he really conceived a child at 88 but I think he did her father who was born in the 1800s was a very different man OK that generation was so different than what you’ve ever experienced because most of you who are alive today never met those people I did when I was a lot younger, but they’re gone. They’ve been gone for a while.
You think you know what people were like in the past but you don’t the movies don’t tell you everything and it’s not just about what they did. It’s about who they actually were.
So when I think of her father and her father‘s generation, I think of well yeah frankly smell like Scott Fitzgerald a lot of different interesting people from the bright young things from the 1920s who really are interesting people but what do you think of their literature and you think of their art and their music? It’s like slow down in your analysis of her because I really believe that an infant the first six months of their life are mind blowing the important and her first two months maybe even longer, but I bet it was about two months. We’re spent with her Dad under his control under his supervision in his house. I think he was probably searching for a way to register her searching for a place to put her safely so she could have a normal life. I don’t think he knew what to do. I think he felt like his life was ending and the only people he knew who he would trust to raise a child we’re all old like him.
So what was he supposed to do? He was never going to put his own child up for adoption. He knew too much about all of that being worldly man that he was to just drop her off somewhere at the center and say take my kid. I also think he really loved her and wanted to raise her himself and so he thought this is my kid. I need to find somewhere where maybe we could even reestablish contact with her eventually I wouldn’t be surprised if they tried and fails. I know Thelma was trying and positive fellow was trying to connect with her and her parents just well. Her father just wasn’t interested and that is fact that was always trying to get pictures of Lacey. She shared that and I can tell that that’s actually real.
You read these stories and some of them are a little far-fetched because you can tell the person just wants a different life. This one’s real. I can tell this is traumatic. The pictures are there. The evidence is all there she looks like this man her facial features, especially in person are almost identical. She looks like his daughter. She acts like his daughter. Don’t make me go into this long laundry list of reasons why I’ve decided this is what actually happened. OK I’m not a stupid person.
Anyway, let’s backtrack so her father‘s generation the man who brought her into this world and I believe really loved her and in a sense informed her what all of us were about who everyone was what the world was was born in 1894. Her guide to life on earth came from the late 1800s. So did lambs guide so did JFK‘s guide so did my mothers guide their parents were very different people but that was their first human experience OK that was the first person they met and interacted with to get a sense of everything
I could see where she’s lost and confused because that’s so different. I mean it sounds like what she said that he had her trained to cry for a bottle and some extremely thoughtful way or he was working on it and I have a feeling he was working on probably sleep training her and some very old-fashioned way, and I know all about that . I think that obviously would affect your personality and I think that whole generation this is where there’s different misunderstandings part of it is biology, but then that’s not divorced from from social constructs right there they work together
So she’s inherently different physically, but then her parents I’m gonna call him her parents. Her parents brought her into this world for the first two months probably in a way that in her brain is still stuck because it made so much more sense than anything else because there’s the biology right? So they gave her this idea of being a lady. I’m gonna say a lady OK because that’s what they were raising back then they were raising her to be a real lady
Very appropriate very proper probably very studious probably very careful with everything she did to make sure it was exactly right. That’s what they were raising her to be from the very beginning. That’s where her brain is still aching and you know working to do Because that was what her father gave her as her understanding of reality.
That’s not what the boomers did for their kids obviously, we raised you very differently. so yeah I would imagine that other than just the biology of their body is being inherently different given genetics and evolution and science there’s the element of how how are they raised? They were raised to be serious people I would call at fourth right but that’s kind of what it is. It’s more it’s hard to explain. I don’t know if there’s a good word in the English language. It’s not direct it’s more just what they say is really what’s going on they’re subtle people. They’re very subtle, but it’s a different kind of subtlety
I think we’ve misunderstood not just lamb because I actually think he was definitely straight, but I think we’ve understood a lot of other people too. I can’t even begin to understand how many people leave probably misunderstood from that generation to the point where I wouldn’t trust our understanding of them at the moment almost at all the series mad men is interesting, but after being her neighbor, I can guarantee you we don’t understand their sex life . That was an imaginary understanding of who they really were people. We don’t really understand them. It’s a good show, but it’s not authentic history
I think to be honest the reality looks boring because it’s real and we’re not them and they don’t want us to know what’s going on, but I have a feeling it’s not boring. It’s just probably not quite as mellow, dramatic and sleazy and unstable as the series mad men would depict.
And actually, she’s an interesting person to interact with because she is liberated. She is obviously liberated woman there’s not pretension. She’s not a pretentious person OK but then that gets back to what I was saying her father raised her to be a lady in a way that I don’t think Casi can even comprehend. It’s not a southern lady sweetheart. You’re very condescending woman to everybody. I’ve watched you.
Yeah, I’m so sick of talking about Casi because I’ve looked at that person and yeah, she’s incredibly condescending to everybody. And when I first looked at her, I thought she was that way because she was just reacting to one person who pissed her off and now I’m realizing that’s actually just who she is. That woman is just condescending to every fucking person who reads anything she writes she thinks she knows everything.
And I’m sure she’s been told that and part of what she did to Lacey was to pretend that Lacey had that problem and not her because she wanted to steal Lacey‘s identity and pretend to be her to get the clout that she had in that community and who even knows what else she had in mind
There’s only so much she can do with that though because she’s obviously not Norwegian she has a southern accent. She’s very obese from what I can tell from her pictures and there’s no way anyone in the family looks like her at all and I don’t think anyone would believe that she’s Lacey Banks and frankly, even if they did, her father was a bootlegger so if Casi wants to go around pretending like her father was a mobster with her fat body and her gross attitude it’s not going to mean the same thing. 
People are gonna think your father was a hoodlum and that you’re trash Casi you’re not Lacey Lacey is a very delicate, sexy petite woman in a way that you will never be. You can’t fool me with your photos. I can tell what you really look like. You’re not the only fucking smart person alive. OK you dumb bitch.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she moves into this community once Lacey moves. It starts asking us where she moved and I just want her to know we’re prepared for you to show up in our community and start asking us questions or calling us or trying to scam us.
And let me tell you if you do that to us you will be in prison for being a bat shit crazy fucking weirdo. I will put you in prison. I am not afraid to do that because unlike Lacey, I don’t have some crap family with oil that’s dying because the stupid overworld is controlling everything like a bunch of retards. I don’t have to worry about Dennis Anderson and his need for success I have privacy. OK I can put you in prison you dumb ass bitch.
You’re so fucking obvious you found a rich person who was vulnerable Casi and then you laid your teeth in and you sucked. you look crap, vampire bat with your shit family.
They feel so sorry for themselves. You know what in relation to me. There’s nothing to feel sorry for yourself about so you can’t cry and moan and bitch about how poor you are. I have a poor background too and I did pretty fucking well for myself cause I’m not a piece of shit like you.
I don’t have a prison record like you you little jackass. I don’t need my fucking family to bail me out or whatever the hell you did to her
I can stand up for myself my whole community can because we have privacy and you knew that didn’t you you little crap con artist you little psychopath.
Oh, and don’t think I don’t know. Don’t think I don’t know how much money is involved in this.
What if I decide to sue the perfume community on behalf of a hell of a lot of angry people in Minnesota. do I have a case? Oh I might have a case I might decide to do a lot of really wealthy stupid people who are poisoning us.. I might decide to go for blood and I might use you and your stupidity to do it.
oh I’m sure there are lots of records of what you said to her and what you said to other people and plans that you all made so stupidly so carelessly over the last 10 years all the dumb gossip you came up with Lander Ing her name trying to get me involved in tangling me and trapping me. Oh I could possibly sue a lot of very wealthy people and put them in person and take all their fucking money and I would love it. I would love to do that. I would use the money for good. I will keep some for myself and you’ll be fucked.
So yeah, you gonna come around the neighborhood and start trying to woo me and tell me that you’re on my side will work together think again dumb bitch. i’m not as naïve as you. I’m not as uneducated, pathetic and stupid and gullible and ignorant and backward as you are .
I know that if I get involved with you to screw her over, I’m committing a felony and that she knows that and that she will upholstering somewhere and will probably have nuclear war because I happen to live in reality and I can tell that this is me saying this and I’m not stupid enough Casi to live in never Neverland in some psychotic drug induced psychosis like you. I’m not a crowd addict from some shit family. I can tell that if I screw over Lacey, I’m screwing over a lot of very important people who want me dead.
I don’t think Casi realizes that because she’s their prize pig.
That whole community has been used by these jackasses to control me.
And I am sad that I fell for it. I am sad that anyone has fallen for this bullshit.
OK, she’s a serious person. She seems very uptight and then you have to realize that that’s actually just her sexuality and it’s probably becoming more obvious as she ages because she is curvy and her boobs have gotten bigger. She can’t hide them under blousy clothing anymore. I mean she’s not boxing but she looks like those women OK and there’s something about her where when you see her in person and you get a sense of who she is… you can tell that that’s just her personality. I used to make fun of her in my head and compare her to a couple of different actresses from my generation
But that’s not even who she is. She’s before them. She reminds me more of Mary Tyler Moore. Mary Tyler Moore was an angry either. If you watch her show, you might think that if you took her and put it now and today, but that’s where you have to be a little more educated and learned and understand that people do change OK and that’s the funny thing Casi you’re irritating a very old-fashioned person because your backward and you’re not as sophisticated as you think you are
She is incredibly highfalutin, but that’s because she’s a really big deal. OK so you found a person who was like a celebrity who never was and then you thought they were really impressive because they are and then you assumed that you could somehow make that you you’re so stupid you’re so stupid.
You can impersonate people like Jackie Kennedy you can be inspired by them. I mean a lot of people are not just you. I was. I’ve been inspired by other women that I’ve seen from that generation too because they are fun to look ok but then that’s where you leave it Casi you imitate them for a day with a sheath dress, you imitate their hair you don’t impersonate them and alter your entire world to be like that person thinking you’re being smart?
And I don’t even know how many other people have tried that with her and it’s moronic you can’t do that and it’s not just jealousy. It’s it’s like you don’t understand what you’re doing because it’s just you’re taking yourself too seriously and you’re thinking you’re smarter than you are and you’re overwhelmed by what you’re seeing with her and instead of being humble you chose arrogance Casi and a lot of other people did too in the perfume community instead of just understanding that you’re seeing something different than you and accepting that you had to make it something relatable because otherwise in your world, as backward as you are, you feel threatened by her.
You couldn’t just let her be who she is and be yourself because you felt threatened because you’re stupid
Sweetheart, if you went to New York City in the 50s, you’d be threatened by everybody alive you’d be threatened by everything that existed at that time because you are a backwards stupid bitch. Obviously a whore. And you are so backward that you’ve never had anyone tell you to your face that you’re a fat, fucking phony whore. And you’ve been sheltered by your stupid crap family who doesn’t want you to ever figure that out because they feel sorry for you for being a shit family.
And instead of taking accountability for being a shit family, they decided to throw her and me and everyone under the bus because that’s what was useful for a bunch of crap billionaires who don’t give a shit about anyone but themselves.
No, they used you like a tool in the community and in everyone’s psychology because you’re a pitiable person you’re fat you’re slightly ugly and you’re desperate to be beautiful. It’s so obvious you’re desperate.
OK so now what know what because you didn’t take this seriously enough they were too stupid in your community to take you seriously or any of this seriously enough because they’re crap intellectually
I can only handle so much of your perfume reviews until I start wanting to vomit because some of what you people say is just dumb. It’s just so dumb.
She saw it as art I understand that, but she’s a woman who I think by nature would like to wear gloves and a hat everywhere she goes. And you have to accept that and understand that if you want to get an idea of reality, this is a person who really wants that for themselves that’s what feels comfortable to them just like some of us feel comfortable wearing a baseball cap or tennis shoes she feels comfortable, wearing white gloves and a nice hat. And we’ve not allowed that for her and she’s been very understanding OK but that’s who you’re aggravating somebody who’s already extraordinarily aggravated all of the time
I have a feeling you wanted her to get angry at you yeah OK she is angry, but not at you. You don’t affect her because you’re nothing. You’re nobody. You’re some dumb ass whore from a shit family. That’s incredibly poor. What the fuck could you possibly do to threaten her you fucking idiot?
Casi: I mean, I could do a lot.
