Keen to Cross the Pond

A-Punk by Vampire Weekend plays.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. went too far.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. wants Elliott Roosevelt to be omnipresent or he’s going to take over Lacey’s body to try to successfully seduce Lem for eternity. Because Bobby Jr. is only a clingy, needy, delusional desperate housewife like his mommy Ethel. Yes…merely. Only. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is possibly either gay or bisexual and he can’t face it because he’s an Ethel. Ethel Skakel Kennedy is possibly like Rose Fitzgerald, although not for certain. Ethel can’t let go of Bobby Kennedy Sr.. Ethel lies about what Bobby does so she doesn’t feel rejected. And Bobby Kennedy Jr. might easily be lying about Lem’s heterosexual orientation because he can’t handle being rejected by Lem. Because Bobby Kennedy Jr. and Ethel both possibly had a crush on Lemmers. And Lemmers might have been a name Mr. Billings called his son Lem that Jack stole from Lem and then tried to use sexually on him to connote a profound sexual intimacy, secrecy and knowing between them. And so Ethel and Bobby Jr. might use the same affectionate title Lemmers. Because it’s creepy that Ethel and Bobby possibly both tried to “sex Lemmers up” at the same time. But the Kennedy family did that. Almost as a tradition. When you got one Kennedy you got another one for free, so to speak.

Jackie Bouvier got JFK…and Jackie’s “surprise Kennedy sex token”was Bobby Sr.. Janet (Joe’s secretary) slept with Joe Kennedy Sr. and her “surprise sex token” was John Fitzgerald Kennedy, Joe’s son. Bobby Kennedy Jr.’s first wife slept with Bobby Jr. and her “surprise sex token” was likely Michael Lemoyne Kennedy. Rachel Ward son Bobby Kennedy Jr. and her “surprise sex token” was David Anthony Kennedy and actually she preferred the token apparently. Lacey fell in love with Joe Sr. or Joe Jr. and her “surprise sex token” was Joe Jr. or Joe Sr. or Jack or Bobby. The Kennedy family couldn’t figure out which token was her’s?

So Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a Jeep. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a Ford. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a Mercedes. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in an Audi. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a Toyota. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a…Volvo. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a Chevrolet. Bobby Kennedy Jr. is in a BMW.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. drives around Lem in a parking lot of a 1980’s storage facility. Did Lem swallow a key to a storage facility filled with his childhood items? Before he died.

“I knew Ethel was going to prompt you to attack me. And shoot me full of a deadly amount of heroin because you both couldn’t handle hearing no from a person you were sexually pursuing.” says Lem to Bobby Jr.. “And Ethel just couldn’t handle that she wasn’t arousing to me the way Lacey is. She’s a cold hearted ugly bitch like you, Bobby Kennedy Jr.?” Lem thinks. “Or what? You all knew I committed suicide on Jack’s birthday or near it…because I HATED all of you at that point and him most of all. I wanted the symbolism to be that I died…the day Jack…was born. I DIED the day Jack was born.”

“You died because you loved Jack and you couldn’t handle another birthday without him!” says Ethel Kennedy pleadingly of Lem.

“No!!! I died because I couldn’t stand Jack or my life.” says Lem to Ethel.

“No! Daddy…daddy…daddy…daddy you died because you needed us!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr. desperately to Lem in all seriousness. Bobby Kennedy Jr. has parked the car and is sitting staring at Lem with his feet touching the pavement. Ethel stands there in a 1960’s dress dressed-up for an event for Bobby’s Presidential 1968 election.

Ethel may have made a deal with the Illuminati to live at the expense of the lives Americans. She was tired of dying and watching people die so she uses the Illuminati to suck the living breath out of lesser classed Americans? Or just Americans not in the Illuminati so technically those of a much higher class than her kids and all her family.

My Name Is by Eminem plays.

“These be good people! Shake your asses in their honor.” says Jonah appearing in the parking lot spiritually suddenly. “I’m gonna go ahead and get on down now and I suggest you follow my example as the Holy Spirit leads you.” And at that Summertime Sadness does a strip tease to What’s Poppin by Jack Harlow.

“Why are you doing that?!” says one of Summertime Sadness’s truly religious Tik Tok followers who suddenly appears in the parking lot with a kind, loving Christian smile on her face. Ethel, Lem, Bobby Kennedy Jr. and the follower watch.

“I’m getting good with Jesus.” says Jonah. “What?! It’s what they tell us to do and I don’t question it.”

“Why don’t you question it?!” asks the follower growing concerned and repulsed by Jonah.

“I’m a Christian!” says Jonah. “Don’t be so dependent on food stamps. Walk don’t crawl. Follow Bests. Follow Jesus to the cross.”

He walks up to the car and sits on the hood in his underwear. “Take my photo, hot stuff.” Then he lays on the hood on his stomach…and then falls asleep.

His follower follows him to the hood of the car and examines him in his underwear. “You really are…sexy Jonah.” she says. She’s 23. “You’re kinda…yeah…sexy!”

At then at lightening speed he suddenly rouses from his slumber and stands on the hood of car. “I’m not sexy!! That’s an abomination!!”

Prokofiev’s Romeo and Juliet plays.

“Why is it an abomination?!” asks the Tik Tok follower, suddenly in shock. She feels guilty and shamed for finding his sexual overtures as a man (Jonah is an adult man in his 20’s) arousing.

“Because! Christians don’t have sex!! That’s not what we do!” says Jonah.

“Oh yeah. Before marriage. …But I still find what you’re doing arousing!” the female 23 year old follower says to Jonah feeling hurt.

“I started my account with the hope of finding love. I lie about it to some degree. Maybe. In a way.” says Jonah suddenly sitting down on the hood of Bobby Kennedy Jr.’s BMW in the parking lot of the storage facility.

“So then what’s the problem Jonah!? I’m falling madly in love with you!!” says the 23 year old Tik Tok follower to Jonah.

“I’m not like that!” Jonah says in sudden prim disdain.

“No!! You’re mine!!” the 23 year old follower yells, crawls on to the hood of Bobby Kennedy Jr.’s BMW and then crawls on top of Jonah.

Summertime Sadness giggles. He then makes out with his 23 year old follower passionately. They do however abstain from having sex.

“If you’re a bisexual then I’m your man, hot stuff!” says the 23 year old follower as they make-out. They almost have sex but yes, they refrain.

Jealously insulted by Jonah’s attention paid to him Ethel and Bobby Kennedy Jr. calm their egos enough to be able to talk. They look bourgeois-stuffy, irritated and confused by why it wasn’t sex being offered to them.

“So! What’s this all about then?!” asks Bobby Kennedy Jr. of everyone at the scene as if he’s the literal morality police.

“I’ll have sex with Lem! That’s what I’ll do! I’ll have sex with Lem. I’ll fix it for all of us.” says Ethel (as the adult she was in the 1960’s in the 1960’s dress she wore to Bobby Kennedy Sr.’s Presidential election rally) toward Lem as she’s now “wet” in her vagina and horrifically aroused overall by the pre-sex scene on the hood of her son’s car.

“Okay! Weirdo!” yells Bobby Kennedy Jr. laughing awkwardly.

Lem takes out an English sword from the 1700’s and holds it out. Ethel not even looking up to see where she’s going charges forward shaking in sexual anticipation toward Lem. She walks very quickly into the sword and impales herself into it.

Bobby Kennedy Sr. who maybe really did love Ethel looks on with a sense of betrayal and sadness. He’s tried desperately not to cry. He now looks even more hurt by seeing Ethel kill herself from a sword piercing her literal heart.

As Ethel collapses flat onto her back of the parking lot with the English sword from the 1700’s sticking out of her chest Tom Jones’s It’s Not Unusual plays. Lem looks down at her and looks slightly exasperated. This sort of scene was common in the Kennedy family. It’s just exasperating to have to deal with them.

More later.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. channels Tippi Hedren to try to use the pedophiles to attack the Schiebels. She both does and does not attack them.

And still later.

Lacey wears vintage Cacharel from the 1980’s. The Eau De Toilette natural spray. Because she likes it and she isn’t going to let catty, pretentious lesbians like Casi control her tastes. Lacey likes what she damn well then Christ saved likes. Because she doesn’t lie.

And speaking of catty, PRETENTIOUS lesbians…Lacey had a conversation with the Illuminati and realized that…she made a mistake. See…Lacey (same Lacey from the last sentence) is genuinely 100% not aroused or attracted to women…HOWEVER…*she giggles*. she wears vintage Cacharel. And turns out…Lacey may have made a mistake. Why?! How?!? Umm…see Lacey LOVES warfare. Like she LOVES, LOVES warfare. She LOVES war. …And it’s possible Joe Kennedy Jr.’s ghost suggested to Lacey that she let homosexual women get the wrong idea for reasons of…what was it? Self-defense? Possibly early in Lacey’s life Lacey let Joe Kennedy Jr. give her FAR too much life advice. So…Lacey thought that somehow it made sense. Why and how it made sense is baffling to Lacey at this specific moment but she’ll work it out today in her mind as accurately as possible. Regardless, the purpose was to acquire these lesbians for the purposes of war.

Yes! The purpose of war. Lacey, as she literally just said in her last paragraph, loves war. And unlike some people lesbians often can be cajoled into fighting alongside her specifically. The reason why of course is because…because…*Lacey shrugs* Well…she’ll figure that out. But…the point is she made a mistake because seemingly lesbians get the wrong idea and think you’re really in love? And no Lacey doesn’t ever make physical contact with other women or insinuate that she’s actually interested in them to her knowledge.

Or if Lacey did it’s because Lacey has never been loved. At least not by anyone alive. So…she’s confused. She’s not confused by her orientation. Lacey is 100% heterosexual. She just…thought lesbians would be an eccentric but exciting source of manpower. Why because Lacey used to be a feminist. Like Lacey was a real, ADAMANT feminist and she was thrilled by the concept of women fighting side by side to defeat pure evil. And Lacey thought lesbians were a great way to harness the human power element to defeat evil.

Elliott Roosevelt smiles. He probably could have explained to Lacey the flaws in her plan of war…but…he was dead.

Instead Joe Kennedy Jr. just…well…ruined it…seemingly. And now all the lesbians aren’t helping Lacey but have tried instead to throw Lacey into Hell and she isn’t even clear on why. They aren’t adding Lacey they’re just VICIOUS, presumptuous asses.

“Yes! You piece of shit! I’ll kill you! …My power you poser of a toad of humanity comes from myself not from men like you! Get beneath me you worthless nothing!” the nicest lesbians say to Lacey if they bother to acknowledge her at all as a piece of the fabric of the universe.

“Nay! It comes from men! And from God first if you worship Him!” says Lacey to the nice lesbians.

“Wait! Wait! I’m not that mean!” says a smarmy lesbian trying to rape Lacey.

“No! Lacey’s really not a lesbian.” says Michael Rockefeller. “And then you cruel old miserly hens start a class war.”

The women all listen to him but then try to seduce him. As they do now to Lacey entirely. See Lacey has never been loved. Truly. By any mother figure. Other than maybe thee Mlle. Coco Chanel.

“I don’t tolerate my daughter.” says Coco Chanel about Lacey.

“So are there any lesbians who would like to explain nicely and politely why they’re mad at me?” asks Lacey cheerfully.

The smarmy rapist lesbian laughs.

“We have no idea what you’re doing.” says a straight man on behalf of all lesbians to Lacey.

“In what way?” asks Lacey.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!?” says Casi to Lacey.

“I’m confused. That’s not an explanation.” Lacey says to Casi.

“She doesn’t owe you an explanation!” says the lesbians to Lacey. They are foaming at the mouth.

“She does!! Especially now after I’ve tried to sort out what happened.” says Lacey in her own self-defense.

“Oh, so finally lesbians are being called out as the heartless, half-wit, useless cows they actually are in reality?!” asks a Republican Christian man.

“Umm…so why did you think we wouldn’t be aroused?” asks a nerdy lesbian of Lacey.

“Hmm. You know as absurd as it sounds I may not have thought I had any real sexual magnetism. Like…none at all. Or something along those lines. So I just thought you’d get over mr before any lesbian would get hurt.” says Lacey. “Or if you did…you’d just…get over me very quickly or I’d help you get over me. I’m an expert at getting over people. I’ve never been loved and I’m actually extremely good at getting over people. So…I think I thought it would work if necessary.” She thinks. “The thing is I doubt I meant anyone any real long-term harm. I possibly never meant any lesbian any harm at all.”

“But YOU’RE LOVED!!!” yells Jonah Wiley at Lacey but also at all of his followers but as if they’d be idiots for doubting the frailty of humanity or human love and believing instead in the existence of actual Hell, sin and death.

“You are OBNOXIOUS!” Lacey yells at Jonah Wiley in his delusion. “Some things are FAR worse than you might imagine. You seem VIOLENTLY NARCISSISTICALLY sheltered whether you are or are not.”

“So you’ve literally never been loved?!” asks the nerdy lesbian of Lacey.

“Are you BRAINDEAD OR BRAINWASHED?!?” Lacey yells at her. “I LOVE!! I LOVE!! But other living humans don’t love me.”

“No. I refuse to say it.” say all Millennials about Lacey. “I refuse to tell her one honest thing that would be useful to her survival unless it helps me more than I think it would help her or unless it aids in my success or pleases my parents. She’s nothing to me. I’m a god. Right New Age experts? We’re gods. Right??” they mostly all say with the dumb, trusting look of an infant. It’s not dumb except they’re not supposed to be so gullible and assume they’re never going to be lied to.

“We make the Billings look guilty of our sins. Possibly. It’s fun for us. We get treasures!” says Joe Kennedy Sr. with deep, sad, mournful apologies possibly offered to those he may be apologizing to.

“You’re not interested in me?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“No!! What am I even doing that makes you keep thinking that?!” asks Lacey in all sincerity and seriousness.

“You talked to me.” says Casi to Lacey.

“I’m wondering if you’re hearing voices. Did you hear demons or ghosts impersonating me??” asks Lacey of Casi.

“So I just IMAGINED all your interest in me?!?” Casi scoffs at Lacey like a rabid incel. Not a sexually frustrated normal man frustrated by women but a man who’s actually mentally deranged.

“I’m normal!!” yells Casi at Lacey with HUGE self-righteousness.

“I have no clue what bullshit you want now? You seem like a cow!!” says Lacey to Casi.

“So you’re not interested in me??” Casi asks Lacey.

“Dear God help me…NOOOOOOO!” Lacey rips Casi’s head off after smashing her skull in if necessary.

Partially silenced Lacey tears out Casi’s tongue, gouges out her eyes and then smashes the eyeballs under her feet. The tongue could be useful for cats who Casi has terrorized with beastiality so Lacey saves it. Lacey then cuts Casi’s gross, fatty body into square pieces. Casi (The Loudest Perfume Hater) clothes, house and family may be slaughtered by the Russians. Casi’s abrasive, aggressive and yet sad perfume collection confiscated by the Russians of course as well. Then Norway is held at gunpoint and knifepoint until they acknowledge the Crown of 1954 that ran their country for all concerned unless it’s an evil thing to do. Casi’s body pieces are then burned over a fire. The tongue is used by cats who hated Casi. Well…secretly hated Casi as they were helpless and couldn’t be protected.

Kick who’s been sleeping incestuously (literally sexual co-sleeping without sex) with her brother Joe Kennedy Jr. in Purgatory close to Hell comes on to him. “Hey! Maybe this will work to understand Lacey. This part of her psychology.” she says to Joe.

Then Lacey puts Casi back together, removes cats from her house and then, since this is only a blog, the Russians don’t have to attack Casi’s family after all unless they see it otherwise and then what can we do? How would the Russians get into Casi’s house? It’s on American soil. Right?! What does soil mean? What is America? Why do we care? Why…would the Russians care?

“So we thought you were in love with us!” say lesbians to Lacey.

“Why?!? I clearly was straight.” says Lacey to all lesbians.

“Not to us!!” say all lesbians.

“Why does that matter?!?!” asks Lacey of all lesbians.

“Here comes the lesbian class war again!!” says a man.

“Because OUR feelings matter more than anything or anyone else’s feelings!!” they say to all of humankind throughout all of human history.

“That’s not true.” Lacey says to Casi and all lesbians to ever live. “Your feelings do not matter more than all other human being’s feelings to ever live.”

“But we are the lordly lords of lore.” all living lesbians say.

“No. You sound insane.” says Lacey to all living lesbians.

“So you sadistically attacked an illegitimate child of an American aristocrat he had too late in life to properly raise? Or she’s just an aristocratic Norwegian-American by blood? And so she has to pretend to be herself..to survive…and we don’t believe her because why?” asks a living Englishwoman of the world. “She’s acting. And yet…it’s her real personality for the most part.”

“I would love to just hide away in England somewhere and get my mind back.” says Lacey to England that cares.

“Why?” ask Michael laughing with Lacey.

Lacey laughs. “Why don’t they see it?!?” she asks Michael as she laughs. Then she grows terrified. “Am I imagining things?!”

“No! The Kennedys might really be having sex…with each other!” laughs Michael as he talks with Lacey.

Lacey looks horrified and profoundly sad.

Michael cries.

“Well…so what’s going on?!” asks Lacey cheerfully of Michael.

Michael laughs.

Micheal laughs.

Time passes. Lacey looks like she’s getting excruciatingly painfully lonely.

“DAMMIT!!!” Michael yells as he snaps his fingers in Lacey’s face.

She closes her eyes unsure what he wants from her.

“They’re having sex!” Michael whispers to Lacey.

“No they aren’t!” says Lacey to Michael questioningly in desperation.

“Lacey they are!” says Michael to Lacey.

“But that’s technically impossible since they’re siblings.” says Lacey to Michael.

“Yes! But they like to pretend.” says Michael.

“But why?!” asks Lacey, aghast.

“It’s not like how Ghislaine Maxwell possibly likes to pretend that she cares sincerely about you as her adopted daughter or you play along out of respect for some possible tiny shred of authority God might be or have given her over you should He choose to do so here and there or etc..” says Michael.

“Why haven’t you died of Covid?!?” Dimitry of Greece and Australia asks Lacey. It’s unclear if he wants her dead of Covid or is concerned about her.

Lacey ignores Dimitry because she can’t make heads or tails of what he’s talking about.

“Dmitry!” says Michael to Lacey.

“Right! Thank you!” she says to Michael.

Lem looks at Lacey apologetically and Lacey can barely stand it.

“Lacey I think they think they’re in love.” Michael says to Lacey.

“That’s insane!” Lacey says as she contorts her face to one of deep anguish.

(Adult content below)

“It’s your problem you didn’t understand us!” Joe Jr. Kennedy says as he runs around the hotel past Lacey holding Kick with her legs around him.

“He gives me better orgasms than any of my men.” says Kick about her older brother Joe Jr..

“But you’re siblings!” say Lacey trying to be the voice of reason for them.

They turn and look at Lacey with a look of disbelief. Joe Jr. looks officially offended.

“Even if it’s reincarnation…you two were siblings. Or are. Correct?!” asks Lacey.

“We came from the same room.” says Joe Jr..

“I seduced him.” says Kick.

“You seduced your brother?!?” asks her last lover she died on a plane over France with.

Kick looks at him aghast. She shrugs. “I’m dead.”

“Kick…if you mean that…you’re insane.” says Kick’s last lover.

“I’m fine! You’re the one with a problem!” says Kick.

Lacey panics. People will find this disgusting as they should and it’s a vile thing to write if it isn’t true.

“I’m not a fan of your pedantic interpretation of reality.” Kick says bitingly to Lacey.

“Are you trying to be helpful to me by somehow distracting the Illuminati with lies or are you genuinely insane Kick?” Lacey asks Kick.

“She’s INSANE!” Michael says to Lacey about Kick.

“We wondered about Kick for years!” says a Koch to Lacey.

Lacey looks amused at Kick’s profound foolishness as a human. Lacey laughs.

“Kick!!! You’re INSANE!” Lacey says to Kick. Then Lacey prays to God should Kick really be in Purgatory.

“Does she actually think she’s in love with Joe?” Lacey asks Michael.

“Yes!” says Lem. “I’ll say yes, for now.”

“Did you realize that!!??” Lacey asks him.

“Yes!” he says grimly.

“I’m lost. Why did anyone tolerate that?!?” asks Lacey.

“Because! Money.” says a Koch.

“Money?!? That’s IDIOTIC!!!” Lacey yells and rips through time and space and possibly tears a whole in the universe exactly where God catches it.

“No it’s sexy!!!” say a pair of living vampiric Boomers. “Shh! It’s a secret!”

“No! It’s insane. It’s not even a thing.” says Lacey. “I mean they’re just defiling and tormenting each other. But what they’re too vain or stupid or both to realize it cognitively?”

“Yeah, I know. I should have said something.” says a Koch to Lacey.

“Oh.” says Lacey. “It’s so dangerous though. There’s nothing safe about it.”

“It is. It’s…a madness!” says a poet who might have known them.

“You’re confused.” says Lacey.

“No! I’m not!” says the poet. “Right?!” he asks Lacey in fear.

“What’s your logic?” asks Lacey.

“It’s not…love. It’s…love.” says the poet to Lacey.

Lacey thinks. “By that logic we don’t exist at all.”

He looks misogynistically offended. He tries to play tricks in his mind to cope with how stupid she makes him feel.

“Why isn’t it love at all?” he asks Lacey.

“Because they’re siblings. It’s really just that simple.” says Lacey.

The Koch laughs politely.

“Yes! I know!” someone agrees with Lacey about sibling love.

“Sexually abused siblings might think they’re in love of they’ve been sadistically tortured but…for two adults who even if abused should know better…to think that…is…possibly unspeakably creepy.” says Lacey.

Nocturnes, Op. 32: No. 2 A-Flat by Arthur Rubinstein plays.

“They may have been somewhat tortured but not enough to be quite that crazy.” says Ron.

“Then what is going on James Baldwin?!” Lacey asks James Baldwin.

“I think it’s… I need to know your definition of love.” says James Baldwin to Lacey.

“Listen…that’s possibly useless. Let’s talk about why you think siblings are capable of romantic love.” says Lacey to James Baldwin.

“You’re DEMONIC!!” Summertime Sadness yells at Lacey with an erection from way pornography earlier he can’t get out of his mind. He wants to screw Lacey but he doesn’t cognitively understand what he’s feeling so he assumes he’s found her evil?

“I’m not that aroused by you!” Summertime Sadness says indignantly to Lacey.

“Then why are you so violent in response to me every time?” ask Lacey of Summertime Sadness.

“I’m not sure why you think I’m being violent. I’m just convicting you of your OBVIOUS SIN!” yells Jonah at Lacey.

“Which is what?!?” asks Lacey of Jonah.

“You’re a demon infested cesspool!” says poor white conspiracy theorists on Tik Tok to Lacey “led” by Jonah. White supremacists may also guide him spiritually in the Illuminati.

“I’m pretty that’s theologically insane and possibly you’re actually speaking on behalf of actual Hell itself to attack me. How would there be demons around me or in me? Through ghosts? Because Catholics and Episcopalians are rubbish and Charismatics aren’t? Get your facts straight. I’m a Christian and I fight against evil. Or I subject evil to the power of Christ, which is possibly essentially the same thing. Don’t try to glorify evil using Christianity.” says Lacey.

“I think we thought we’d do a Communist uprising.” says a white nationalist.

“Let’s get back to why you think siblings can be in love romantically.” Lacey says to James Baldwin.

“Because they’re alike!” he says.

“That’s stupid. So what!!” say Lacey.

“Because they have to be.” he says.

“No!! That’s insane. …They’re far too much alike in the natural world as God created it!” says Lacey. “Are you secretly an idiot?! Don’t you know anything about genetics?”

“So your argument is that their very fabric is the same fabric.” says James Baldwin.

“Yes!! Obviously!” says Lacey.

James Baldwin is escorted off stage by angels who will have to iron things out on God’s behalf.

“Kick! Tell us why you’re in love with Joe!” Lacey says to her.

“It’s a secret.” says Kick.

“Why him though?” asks Lacey of Kick.

“Because he’s just that hot!” says Kick.

“He is!” says Lacey to Kick. “But…why does that affect you?!”

“Because he’s better than all the guys.” says Kick.

“True. But…Kick he’s your brother.” says Lacey. “You had the home field advantage.”

“I had him!” she says. “He’s all I ever had.”

“But then why romantic love?!” asks Lacey.

“Because he’s hot!” says Kick to Lacey.

“So unlike masturbating if you’re an adult you have a sibling who’s your sibling and in your case…since he’s hot and you’re not…you want to use him to masturbate?” asks Lacey. “Kick he’s not you!”

“No! I’m not using him to masturbate!” says Kick to Lacey.

“But Joe Jr. can’t resist you due to inherent familiar love, Kick. He should innately already love you in a familial way. And in your case using that to control him to trick him into thinking he loves you or whatever the trick is…is certainly evil and likely insane. He’s…not necessarily for you. And if you want to keep him hostage to you to brutalize me or other women then…that’s sociopathic Kick. Kick that’s psychopathic thinking not romantic love!” says Lacey.

“But see…he’s just a man.” says Kick laughing.

“But your familial bond still matters after death. Right?!” says Lacey to Kick. “Because God watched our lives while we were alive Kick.”

“Go on!” says Kick to Lacey.

“Did you hear a word I just said? Kick…as much as you want to use him to bring glory to yourself that isn’t your glory necessarily to have…it’s nonsense anyway. Because he was totally and completely yourbrother!” says Lacey. “You’re trying to steal from him for the Kennedy sense of entitlement or Rose Fitzgerald sense of entitlement. You and Jack and Bobby Jr. and Ethel are so much alike. …Do you want me to resort to Irish racism to try to get you to see?!?” says Lacey. “Why do you lie?! You lie!!”

“She’s not right. I’m incredibly attractive! She’s right. I did steal Joe to make her own her inferior status in comparison to me.” says Kick who then is escorted off with Joe Jr..

“Oh look! A Kennedy boy done took up the cause! Bless him! We gonna get really listened to now! We got a Kennedy on our side!!” says a so-called white trash American. He’s being sarcastic.

“Don’t you all marry your siblings and cousins too though? I would think you would feel clan loyalty!” Lacey says to the so-called white trash man.

He laughs. “We don’t see it the same way. It’s not a good thing. It just happens.”

“But then how do you perceive it?” asks Lacey.

“They’re insane.” he says shrugging.

“But then that’s all it is!” says Lacey sadly. “ It’s not a thing. It’s just a waste of one’s life for the glory if Hell which is nothing but suicide of the soul or spirit?”

“And why don’t they see it that way?!” he asks kindly of Lacey.

“Why?! It’s so offensive that they don’t see it.” says Lacey.

“They’re poor in their minds.” he says.

“And that’s where I get lost. Because they’re dead! And I’d think they’d choose Christ after death! But…as a Christian it’s so challenging as has been much if not all of my last ten years of life.” says Lacey. “I cannot tell you how many times I’ve felt abandoned by God but I can’t wait to see what really is going on. And honestly my faith is more because it’s necessary to get by.”

“I’ll tell you Lacey, I’ve never felt so spiritually attacked in all my life than I have over the last eight years or so.” he says.

“See, I’m sorry but I worship God. So if your next thought is that I’m the Antichrist be careful. I’m not sure how you could think that without being a liar potentially or unaware that it makes little theological sense in my case.” says Lacey. “If you want to know the truth: Worship God and by God I mean Jesus. Do you cognitively understand? I hope so!” and at that she attempts to kindly walk away.

“Well that got weird!” says Michael Rockefeller.

“I can’t tell if he was friend, foe or alien.” says Lacey.

“Why did you want a lesbian army?!” Casi asks Lacey.

“I’m just human. I do love war.” says Lacey to Casi.

“So why didn’t you try to make me think you liked me?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“Right! Because you’d be a bad ally in that way.” says Lacey to Casi.

“Why?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“Because you’re a loose cannon.” says Lacey.

“Were you using me?” Casi asks Lacey.

“Of course. I had so many followers and you served as a sort of…psychotic barrier.” says Lacey to Casi.

“A psychotic barrier?!” says Casi.

“Yes! I don’t think you get it. I hoped for friendship. I was NEVER going to love you as anything but an entirely non sexual and non romantic friend or sister-in-Christ EVER. For eternity.“ says Lacey sincerely telling the truth. “I don’t think you get it…I just can’t love you that way ever. I CAN’T and I DON’T WANT TO.”

“So you don’t want to be into me and you also can’t plausibly in any way shape or form be into me?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“How awkward for you because I’m amazing.” says Casi.

“Not to me in that way. It’s stupid to not get that. I don’t think you’re amazing in relation to me at all.“ says Lacey to Casi.

“Do you think I could be to someone else?” Casi asks Lacey.

“Yes! Or I did. But I’m not them.” says Lacey to Casi.

“I thought you liked me.” says Casi.

“Or what?! You’d have snubbed me?!” asks Lacey.

“Yes!” says Casi to Lacey.

“Why?!” asks Lacey.

“Because you seemed so cheap!” Casi says bitingly.

“I can’t tell if you’re being narcissistic or honest. I did collect perfume differently than other people but it wasn’t necessarily all that cheap. I spent thousands of Dollars of net money from my own inherited funds to start my my collection. Mine was a real intellectual approach and not cosmetics or vanity. You’re not as cool as you think you are. To me you’re just a genuine idiot potentially. I’m sorry if I’m wrong.” says Lacey. “Don’t kill yourself just get a grip.”

“Why did it NEVER occur to you that you wear the perfume as a cosmetic!” says Mr. Cologne 76 to Lacey thinking he’s caught Lacey being stupid and lying about the money.

“You’re not going to be able to respect me?” Lacey asks Mr. Cologne 76.

“No!!” he says.

“So then the fact that you’re making black men look like fucking dogs isn’t important to you because you’re way off intellectually. And you have pretentious, vain tastes not good tastes.” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76.

“How am I off intellectually?” he asks.

“Do you respect me?” asks Lacey of Mr. Cologne 76.

“I’m a racist! Okay! I tell myself white people are dumb to get by.” Mr. Cologne 76 says to Lacey.

“Do you want to hear my explanation? Because I worry that even if I tell you, you’ll only pervert it to feel personally superior.” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76.

“Yeah.” he says.

“I’ve explained it so many times before. And it’s so simple. …I was analyzing each perfume. And I’m smart enough to rummage through each note in my mind. I’m that smart. I was genuinely investigating perfume. And I knew it wasn’t typical. I didn’t care. It was Instagram. And you’re not my slave owners. Don’t you get it?! It was about freedom. And art. You don’t understand art the way I do. …I found the bloody Illuminati. I detected them. I date ghosts. …My father ran the world, so to speak. …I’m unusual. Okay?!!!?? …I KNOW I wear perfume. That’s how one appreciates the art of perfume. It’s a sensual art.” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76.

“That’s word soup to me.” says Mr. Cologne 76.

“No! You’re just a liar. Right?” asks Lacey.

“Hi!” says Lem.

“Who even was Tommy Banks?” asks Dr. Moritz lying to try to feel less scared.

“No. I don’t get why you wear perfume.” says Mr. Cologne 76 to Lacey.

“You’re exasperating. And I don’t normally say that but I’m losing patience.” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76. “One wears perfume to let it reveal itself on one’s skin.”

“Okay fine. I found you abrasive so I lie and don’t listen to what you’re actually saying ever and am petty and don’t want to be bothered anymore because one of my biggest goals was to be better than you somehow. You do have a huge hater group obsessed with your downfall and pain and feeling better than you in sociopathic ways to feel superior egoistically. …I just couldn’t stand you being so genuinely superior.” he says.

“And you all could sense I wasn’t loved so you acted like rabid dogs and so you attacked me at my soul. …But…*she shrugs* that’s all I’ve ever experienced. I’ve never been loved. And maybe it’s not a good sign that most humans are acting so profoundly evil.” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76.

Satie: 3 Gymnopédies: No. 3 Lent et grave by Satie plays.

And Tucker Carlson got fired. Tucker Carlson?! …Tucker Carlson?! Why?!

And at that the Illuminati and the perfume community demand Lacey not be allowed to be seen as old money, white, cis, female, male, straight, rich or human.

“Works for me!” says Michael Rockefeller grinning. “She’s not subject to any of that. She belongs to Jesus Christ through the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross.”

They scoff.

“So MSN is dead?” asks Michael Rockefeller.

“What’s MSN?” asks the Illuminati.

“MSN. Figure it out the way Lacey figured out you guys are the Illuminati.” says Lem to the Illuminati.

“I’m in love with Jack!” says Kick to be funny.

“Wow! That’s big news!” Lacey says to her joking back.

Later.

“What’s MSN?” Michael asks the Illuminati.

They ignore him.

“What’s MSN?!” Michael asks the Illuminati.

Don L. raises his hand to answer.

“Is it main stream news?” asks Don.

“Yes!” says Michael.

“That’s dangerous! For the Illuminati.” says Lem Billings’s father.

“I have a question: What am I doing that makes queer women feel like they have a chance with me?” asks Lacey.

“So you’re like Mary Tyler Moore in The Dick Van Dyke Show?” Casi asks Lacey.

“More than any Millennial woman. But also June Cleaver.” says Lacey. “But also Elinor Donahue who played Ellie Walker in the Andy Griffith Show.” She thinks. “I’m the most like Elinor Donahue’s character.”

“You’re like a literal living ghost.” says Casi.

“Possibly!” says Lacey.

“You’re a lot like June Cleaver.” says Dr. Moritz to Lacey.

“Yes! And Lauren Bacall slightly. …Yeah! I’m very much like those women.” says Lacey.

“Bobby Kennedy Jr. who is Opie doesn’t understand that you’re actually like Miss. Ellie.” says Casi to Lacey.

“Correct, it seems. None of them do! …And it’s been that way my whole life.” says Lacey.

“Not even the people who molested you?” asks Casi.

“Not really. …Molestation is a different topic though. But no, it’s a horrible experience at this point. It was far more bearable when I was younger.” says Lacey.

“Would it have been better to have been aborted?” asks Casi.

“It’s too late for that now isn’t it?” Lacey smiles. “See…my kids are what matter. But if I could have given birth to them in Heaven I wish I’d been born there. But it’s too late for that and it is murder.” says Lacey.

…

“So…that was weird. We were just talking about Jesus and we lost track of time!” says Jonah as he approaches Lem with the 23 year old female follower on Tik Tok.

Lem can’t respond to Jonah as he’s being brutally attacked by the Illuminati.

“Kick who marries who in your family if you think it’s sane to pair off?” asks Lacey.

She sighs. “You marry Joe.” she says to Lacey.

“Which one?” asks Lacey.

“My son.” she says.

“That’s obviously a no. But go on.” says Lacey.

“Jackie marries Bobby. My dad marries Rose Marie. Lem marries you I guess… Jack marries Ted. Eunice and Pat pair off. Jean marries Bobby Jr..” she says. “My mother marries our first nanny.” Kick thinks. “Yeah, it’s nuts.”

“I like Lem and I.” says Lacey.

“Okay!” she says shrugging. She laughs.

And at that Bobby drives off in his BMW at 100 mph. out of the parking lot and down the highway nearby.

“I thought, ‘I need to break the suspense.’” says Bobby’s wife about why she had an affair.

“I understand. It’s still wrong. But I understand the need to try to grapple with the situation and not avoid it.” says Lacey. “Like, those romantic feelings won’t disappear between you the two of you or they will. And if those marriages are dead then they are dead.”

“Do you think his marriage looked dead?” asks Mr. Blue.

“Yes! Very much so!” says Lacey.

Ethel walks off with Bobby Kennedy Sr. with the sword through her because it’s the afterlife. He holds her hand. She looks worse for the wear.

“Come dear, let’s get that sword out of you.“ says Bobby Sr. to Ethel.

“Let’s go to bed.” says Lem to Lacey.

“Michael has a great choice?” asks Lacey.

“Yes!” says Michael.

“Good! I don’t want him to be lonely without me.” says Lacey.

“Goodnight!” says Michael.

“Goodnight!” says Lacey.

More tomorrow.

Lacey was supposed to save Casi from Casi’s closeted homosexuality or make love to her. Because Casi feels entitled to being permanently rescued by society. Except Lacey isn’t at a homosexual. Lacey isn’t a homosexual…which means Lacey is a cis straight woman. Lacey is not a lesbian. Lacey does not find women at all arousing. Lacey does not find women at all attractive to herself at all in any way. So…Casi is…completely bankrupt. Or close to it.

Actually lots of losers in the perfume community are probably close to bankruptcy by trying to compete with Lacey. Because they don’t cognitively know how to handle their money and they’re too psychotically vain to admit it. They’d rather tempt the Illuminati into killing the whole world than admit they’re false, poor, socio-economic street trash when it comes to issues of conceit and petty hate.

…Our False Fire on Shore by Cemeteries plays.

But Casi will hold out hope that Lacey is a lesbian or a bisexual instead of holding out hope that God will make her (will make Casi) straight in Heaven. Casi is too much of a social climber to be a Republican. Casi’s only way out of her family’s American southern white poverty is the cool-kid Democratic Party. It was obvious to Lacey from the start but Lacey is nice and minds her own business.

Casi often bragged about going to Pride activities with her female sex partner who she was in a committed relationship with supposedly named Misty. Misty was Casi’s ticket out of poverty. Misty was raised in the American bourgeois class and had a good job so Casi made herself pretty for her. Misty was going to buy Casi a $5,000.00 diamond engagement ring of Casi’s dreams but Casi is a slut who can’t control her sociopathic impulses to cheat like her poverty stricken family…and she cheated on Misty or Misty cheated…which is the story…Casi OPENLY told the ENTIRE INTERNET and specifically the perfume community.

“Actually, I identify as straight.” said Casi (verbatim of close to it) in 2015 to the perfume community. But on Twitter in 2015 Casi claimed to be a lesbian leaning bisexual.

“Why are you straight?!” Lacey should have asked Casi but Lacey was American. And in America in 2015 you could be slaughtered for being that “abrasive.” Truly. A person of high social class wasn’t ALLOWED to be so…DEPLORABLE. It was totally shunned to a FASCIST degree.

“OMG!” texted Casi to her upper-middle class female friends who helped her into her “lesbianism” in California? Casi was on her way to a Pride march with Misty. Casi could hardly wait to join the sex sorority of queer well-off white women in Los Angeles? Possibly.

Because Casi is likely a BISEXUAL. Casi is not a straight woman no matter how much she “identifies” otherwise. Casi identifies as straight because it’s shameful to her? Mean girl Millennial women who are actually mid attractive, sheltered idiots HATE homosexuals. They play nice with gay men but they’re VIOLENT and look for weaknesses in everything and everyone because they’re often mindless, EGOTISTICAL pieces of shit by choice. They were raised to see the world as “their oyster” and all people as their followers. They don’t care about or understand almost ANYTHING because they were raised to die and go to Hell. It’s the TRUE American way.

Lacey isn’t a mean girl. Lacey might not even be that much of a Millennial. She might be more of a member of the Silent or Greatest Generation.

“Are you a Greatester?” asks a Gen. X man in the Illuminati of Lacey.

“Isn’t that the dumbest name for us?” asks Lacey. “It’s like a narcissistic take down of an entire generation by demographers. I’m just the greatest but I should stay silent?!”

“Are we like actual zombies?” asks a Millennial woman of u

“Yes! Sociopathic zombies.” says Lacey.

“Are we actual sociopaths?” asks another Millennial woman of Lacey.

“Not all of you but…the generation as a whole is sociopathic.” says Lacey. “The US is toast as a functional country once we take over. We barely know how to do actual thinking on the whole.”

“What do we do?” asks a Brown College cool-kid male in the Illuminati.

“Why don’t YOU know?!?” yells Michael Rockefeller at the Brown graduate.

“Who are you?! A Rockefeller? There’d be poor uns know.” the Brown graduate snickers condescendingly in his head.

“How wealthy are the Rockefellers?” asks Lacey objectively.

“Billionaires.” says someone.

“Still?!?” asks Lacey.

“Aren’t they still billionaires?!” asks a Gen. X man.

“Yes!!” yells someone in the Illuminati.

“Are you sure??” asks Lacey.

“Actually a lot of us did give away millions and millions of US Dollars in the 20th Century!” yells Louis Hill Jr. bitterly. “It’s not unreasonable to see old money poor.”

“Not truly poor but not as rich as the bourgeois violently demand they have to be.” says Lacey. “Old money isn’t a way of measuring how wealthy someone is as it’s been slaughtered into meaning in colloquial language.”

“Dictionaries don’t mean anything!” says Dr. Moritz.

“Then how do we preserve our language?” asks Lacey humoring his poor-Nazi ass. “Not all Nazis were poor after the war. Your family was always poor?”

“I want a real Millennial.” says Dr. Moritz.

“You’re a phony, pseudo intellectual bad businessman who’s barely liquid.” says Lacey. “My father was Thomas Banks. Be careful using the Prohibition in Minneapolis. Algorithms are BRUTAL you cheap, smart-ass.”

“Yeah! So! I’m Michael fucking Rockefeller.” says Michael Rockefeller to Tik Tok scam artists who the Illuminati conjured to attack Lacey through her sincerely loving heart.

“Hey Casi, you want more help?!?” Louis asks Casi. “We lost MILLIONS and what today would be BILLIONS thanks to people like you.”

“I’m sorry we hooked Casi up with the Pride.” says a Millennial lesbian to Lacey.

“Casi is entertaining. I’m sure they had fun with Casi. But Casi is psychotic when it comes to power or Casi has been far too enabled.” says Lacey.

“Are we on the brink of nuclear war?” asks an American.

“If not for the threat of radiation the world might already have ceased to exist.” says Lacey.

Time passes.

“Wait!!! What?!” asks Casi in terror.

“I already knew that!!” says Monika on a lower class but sustainable farm in Poland. Monika dramatically alters her glamour shots to look far different and extremely beautiful when her actual self in reality is not even pretty in reality.

A moment passes.

“Why do we need you need to insult our looks?” asks Monika smugly.

“Because you inappropriately use beauty as a weapon.” says Lacey.

“Yeah okay, but you’re still wrong!” says most living women to Lacey.

“Why?!” asks Lacey.

“Because accuracy doesn’t matter. We just spread our legs and get power and shit from men. Same as always.” most living women say to Lacey heartlessly like they won the war and they’re just waiting for her to get..a…fucking…clue.

“What war are you winning?” asks Lacey.

“Yeah! Monika is ugly.” says Dr. Moritz sincerely.

“So why do all of you humor her so viciously?!” asks Lacey, exasperated.

Dr. Moritz laughs.

“We’re only on the computer for fun.” he says.

“Ah yes! Her.” says Lacey.

“So I had a miscarriage.” says Casi.

“Recently or before?” asks Lacey.

“Before what?!” The Loudest Perfume Hater asks Lacey.

“Before now. You’ve gone on and on and on on Instagram about your miscarriages for years haven’t you? You certainly made me want to throw my phone in exasperation countless times.” says Lacey to Casi.

“But there’s no Hell.” says Monika. “Just Saved By The Bell.” She’s being sincere?

“You’re a racist!” The Loudest Perfume Hater yells at Lacey in the same way she called Lacey poor and lesbian in the perfume community and was embraced and beloved and befriended and believed to be speaking the God’s honest truth.

“No. I’m not a racist!” says Lacey indignantly.

“Yes! You are!” says a black man accusatorially at Lacey. Mr. Cologne 78 has been racially called a boy and told to go dance by Casi (a white southern American woman) who’s actually likely very racist.

“Why 76? What the fuck does that even mean?!” asks Lacey. “Was that when he was born?!”

“I’m so much better than you!” he says sincerely to Lacey.

“How?” asks Lacey.

“Actually, never-mind!!! I don’t even know who you are!! I’m just that supportive and superior.” says Mr. Cologne 76 violently threatening Lacey as per usual. He tends to copy her like most people in the perfume community. Or at least they did until Lacey blocked hundreds of them on instagram including Mr. Cologne 76 and many of his cult members.

“I’m not a cult leader! I have a nice wife who wears pink Creed perfume!” Mr. Cologne 76 says.

“Ohh!!! Creed?!? CREED?! Oh bitch! You is rich!” says Lacey to Mr. Cologne 76 sarcastically.

“We don’t talk like that!” indignantly says a black woman to Lacey who hashtags her cult in the perfume community.

“I don’t think that’s true.” fearfully says Casi like a coward to the the black woman in the perfume community who hashtags her cult.

“She’s right. Your race in the United States does talk in Ebonics.” says Lacey to the black woman in the perfume community who hashtags her cult.

“You’re not on my side!!” yells Casi at Lacey in a rage.

“No!! I am.” says Lacey to Casi.

“No!! You’re not!!” says Casi to Lacey in real fear.

“No! I’m more you than you.” says Lacey. “Racism is you. Not me. You’re a cheap white fraud?”

“So you want to take our land and keep us in Bell…but your not a racist?!” indignantly asks Mr. Cologne 76 of Lacey in all sincerity.

“I feel like I’m such an Aries!” says Casi in deep sincerity to all concerned.

“An Aries. That’s really weird. Maybe Lem was technically an Aries. …You channel him and then think you’re him.” says Lacey to The Loudest Perfume Hater.

“Are the blacks fighting a race war against whites and we’re imagining racism?” asks a white supremacist in the Illuminati of Aries-Casi.

“You channeled F. Scott Fitzgerald too, didn’t you?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“I can’t channel an actual ghost!” says Casi to Lacey.

“No! You can’t channel a person who’s alive in Christ.” says Lacey.

“How do you know that?! You’re a retarded idiot!” says Casi to Lacey sincerely.

“No, I’m not.” says Lacey.

“You’re a victim of bullying!” says Casi to Lacey like she’s fishing for a way to win.

“Yes! True. Where are you bringing this conversation?” Lacey asks Casi.

“I’m a loser!” says Casi to Lacey.

“What are you even talking about?!?”asks Lacey.

“I’m your worst nightmare!” says Casi to Lacey like Casi is the star of a famous horror film.

“Oh wow! That’s scary! Oh wow!! I’m so impressed. Oh!! Oh!! Are you making me orgasm? Or are you bleeding from your brain from your violent stupidity?” asks Lacey.

“I need to kill Lem!” says Bobby Mennonite Kennedy Jr. seriously. Is he losing his mind? Lem is dead. Or has Bobby become the Antichrist? …Is his nickname now Men? Men Kennedy is Lem Billings’ surrogate son? So it’s Men (not men) vs. Lem?

“I’m a witch!” Casi shrieks at Lacey with a feeling of joy and delight and rage and self/perceived authority.

“Oh! But what about Heaven?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“I don’t think you get it, Lacey. There is no Heaven. It’s just us.” says Men Nennedy (formally Bobby Kennedy Jr..)

“That is theologically asinine. Isn’t iiioo hi it?” asks Lacey.

Bobby Kennedy Jr. refuses to answer the response to his arrogance and vile stupidity.

“What does Men Nennedy think?” asks Lacey.

Men Nennedy is even more indignant.

“What does Robert Weak think?” asks Lacey of Men Nennedy.I no I i I i I o I oiiiiiuiii

Casi laughs maniacally thinking she’s controlling the universe.

“Casi what the fuck are you after?” asks Lacey.

“Your soul!!” she laughs maniacally and without almost any self-awareness at all.

“Jack is after Lacey’s soul from the grave and has literally fucked Satan to steal her soul. It doesn’t work.” says the Theodore H. White wife to The Loudest Perfume Hater.

“There is no Satan!” says Men Nennedy to everyone alive.

“Who is Robert Strong?” asks a pedophile.

“That’s the famous fake name Bobby Kennedy Jr. used to cheat on his late wife.” says Lacey.

“I’m not falling for it. There is no Satan!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr. with the perverted Holy Spirit Imposter spirit(s) often used by evil American pastors.

“I’m not falling for it!!” charges Casi into the dark horizon ENTIRELY created by Lacey in Casi’s imagination.

“Falling for what?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“I feel better from witchcraft.” says Casi.

“Like physically better?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“There is no Robert Weak!” yells Bobby Kennedy Jr. indignantly.

“Then who is Robert Strong?!” asks Lacey.

“He’s a way of channeling his inner Lem Billings!” says a pedophile to Lacey about Bobby Kennedy Jr..

“Yes I feel better! Of course I feel better! Duh!” says Casi to everyone who she has always imagined is stalking her or is obsessed with her.

“Are we going to have to kill you?” the CIA asks Casi. “How is the Illuminati still channeling you so vividly if you’re not actively stalking Lacey?”

“I’m going to kill Lacey. On behalf of all county music singers like me and pedophilic bitch Dolly Parton.” says Reba about Lacey Banks.

“I’d love to hear you brutally molest my last name to feel high and mighty.” says Lacey to Reba.

“Nah! I’m stronger than you, you southern imposter and fake country music star. You don’t understand that American country music stars are more powerful than any gangster to ever live. Including Al Capone. Because we have the power of country must’ve and the country music scene on our side. We also have the Confederate Army and Jesus Christ!” says Reba.

“Hey! Robert Strong are you strong enough to rip off Dolly Parton’s plastic tits?” asks Lacey of Men Nennedy.

“That’s wrong! That’s sexual assault!” says Reba infuriated and outraged to Lacey.

“What about the children you molest?!” asks Lacey of Reba.

“Sometimes I help them and sometimes I molest them.” says Reba.

“Rebecca…you’re not Dolly Parton!” says Lacey. “You can’t defend Dolly Parton via your salvation in Christ as an individual separate from Dolly Parton as another individual recognized by God as an individual separate from you.”

“Oh dear! That sounds so stupid!” says Casi about the comment Lacey made to Reba calling her an individual separate from Dolly Parton. “See that’s what aggravates me about Lacey. Lacey tries to sound smart. But she’s really just a dumbass!”

“Yeah! That’s so true!” says Mr. Blue with the Holy Spirit Imposter.

“Who are you?!” Casi asks Mr. Blue.

“You know Casi you’re brilliant! You understood early on that a person has to fend for themselves and be a Republican to live. You gotta be tough! You can’t do damn thing. You gotta be strong. And I’m a god. See that’s the light of witchcraft.” says Reba to Casi like they’re having a real heart to heart.

“Who are you?!?” asks Casi of Reba indignantly like she’s the CIA and Illuminati and British crown and all of everything.

“I’m not going to say a word. But the way your watching Lacey be pummeled right now is thanks to me!” says Men Nennedy.

“She’s not being pummeled enough!” says Casi to Robert Strong’s Men Nennedy Bus. But Casi means to suggest to Bobby Kennedy Jr. that Jr should be a better person and kill Lacey on her personal behalf.

“Why do you want her dead?” a black wizzard stupidly asks Casi about Lacey.

“Because she’s genuinely superior in every way to everyone in the entire perfume community and as a God fearing American I can’t stand it!” says Casi (a.k.a. The Loudest Perfume Hater) to everyone alive.

“Who?” asks Dolly Parton of Casi. Dolly hates Lacey because Lacey refuses to be nice about Dolly’s possible pedophilic issues.

“Karrie Schiebel. Lacey Banks. Lacey Rockefeller. Lacey Banks Rockefeller. Lacey Banks Billings. Lacey Banks Kennedy Billings. Lacey Banks Kennedy Rockefeller. Lacey Loeb? She’s a Jew, Dolly. …And also Lacey Banks Hill. Pick one. They’re ALL her name. She’s a lying fake rich bitch.” says Casi (a.k.a The Loudest Perfume Hater).

“So the name Rockefeller doesn’t mean anything to you?” asks the black wizard of Casi.

“No!” says Casi.

“I mean Rocky lost the 1960 Presidential election!” says Robert Weak with self-righteous indignation.

“Rocky?!” asks Casi. Casi possibly posted a photo of Rocky wearing a fur coat to make fun of Lacey.

“Witchcraft to save the day!!” says Lacey with sarcasm to everyone alive.

“Rocky was a boxer!” says Casi like the entire Illuminati is genuinely idiotic.

“Yeah, technically she’s right. You guys. That’s the problem. She’s right. You’re all secretly taking about Rocky now!” says Mr. Blue about Casi.

Robert Strong cracks up laughing at the Illuminati.

“You don’t mean Rocky and Bullwinkle?!” asks Casi like she’s being so intelligent and so kind and so intellectual and so mature and so well-read.

“Chris…do you know who Rocky is?” asks Tucker Carlson.

Chris Como laughs innocently at the madness.

“He’s Rocky.” says Chris.

“Rocky who?” asks Lacey.

“Rocky of the Nelson Rockefeller family.” says Chris.

“Of the Nelson Rockefeller family?!” asks Lacey indignantly of Chris.

“The Nelson Rockefeller family!” says Chris with a hint of self-righteousness.

“So you’re making his family run by who?” asks Lacey.

“By John D. Rockefeller!” says Chris to Lacey.

“Who ran the family after J. D. Rockefeller died?” asks Lacey of Chris.

Chris thinks. Waits for the Illuminati to come to his rescue. “It’s the same thing!!” he yells at Lacey like Lacey is a blond bimbo female idiot.

“No. It’s not.” says Lacey to Chris.

“Yeah right! You don’t know the difference!”says Chris to Lacey with misogynistic self-righteousness.

“I do. I suspect you don’t.” says Lacey to Chris.

“So who’s Rocky?!” asks Casi of Chris like he somehow knows.

“He’s Rocky from the Nelson Rockefeller family.” says Chris to Casi.

“Who is he?!” Lacey asks Chris to help but they (Casi and Chris) both ignore her (Lacey).

“It’s your fault they ignored you.” say all the evil poor in the US to Lacey about the fact that she knows who Rocky is and Chris and Casi are ignoring her.

“Hey! Casi…umm…have you noticed that your once fiancé is a Leo who resembles Joe Jr. and his name is Chris?” a poor American asks Casi.

“How is it my fault that they ignored me?!” asks Lacey of the evil American poor.

“Because they should be-“ the evil American poor start to say but are cut off.

“Ignoring her!” says the Chris Hayes wannabe who is using witchcraft to control the evil poor from siding with Lacey at all.

“So what’s gonna happen to the evil poor?!” asks Casi of the Chris Hayes wannabe.

“They struggle? Who cares?!? I’m not poor anymore. Don’t you get it?! I’m one of the elite now!” says the Chris Hayes wannabe to Casi.

Casi looks hurt. Hides it.

“So…is anyone curious who Nelson Rockefeller is?!” asks Lacey cheerfully.

“Shut-up!” yells the perfume community at Lacey as led by Mr. Cologne 76. Barack Obama gave Mr. Cologne 76 his authority.

“Umm. Okay?!?” says Mr. Cologne 76 to Lacey like she’s a stupid Valley Girl.

“What’s a Valley Girl? Here’s a definition:

A valley girl is a socioeconomic, linguistic, and youth subcultural stereotype and stock character originating during the 1980s: any materialistic upper-middle-class young woman, associated with unique vocal and California dialect features, from the Los Angeles commuter communities of the San Fernando Valley.

What is your insult? I’m genuinely confused. Is it an insincere questioning of my socio-economic status? Is it possible that you see yourselves as valley girls? Is it possible you see me as a valley girl and think I’m an idiot? …I’m genuinely confused!” says Lacey sincerely and sweetly.

“You’re the valley girl!” says Casi to Lacey.

“No. You think you’re the valley girl?” Lacey says to Casi.

“Yeah!” Casi says smiling. “My family is legitimately wealthier than your family!” Casi says to Lacey with confidence and honesty finally.

“I’m a lot wealthier than all your family too!” says Me. Cologne 76 to Lacey. “And smarter too!”

“Yeah! I’m a huge deal. I owned a hair salon in Kentucky for years and years.” says Casi’s mom sincerely with self-righteous rage on her daughter’s behalf.

“Yeah! We’re like the Kennedys and Billings. We’re elite. Lacey you don’t understand what it means to be elite.” says Casi’s brother Chris with enormous self-righteous rage on his family’s behalf in possible complete sincerity.

“How much is your land worth?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“Who’s land?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“Your land!” says Lacey to Casi. “How much is your land worth?!”

“It’s a thousand acres.” says Casi to Lacey.

“And you own it?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“No! My parents did.“ says Casi’s mom to Lacey.

“Did they sell it?” asks Lacey of Casi’s mom about the land Casi’s grandparents owned.

“They might have.” says Casi’s mom to Lacey about the land Casi’s maternal grandparents owned.

“Then why do you still count that land? It’s not an original pioneer homestead or a near pioneer homestead or an original plantation or a near original plantation. And you lost the land.” says Lacey to Casi. “Do you have any idea how insulting you are to reality?!” Lacey asks Casi (a.k.a. The Loudest Perfume Hater).

“It’s worth more than your land!” Casi says to Lacey.

“How much would it be worth if your family still actually owned it?” asks Lacey.

“$3 million!” says Casi’s mom to Lacey.

“So you think you’re tricking me by saying that you don’t own it? So you can keep up your delusion that you’re superior? But that’s a delusion. …You probably have a few first cousins who own $10 million in literal land and $3 million in farm implements?” says Lacey to Casi.

“Yes!” says Casi’s brother Chris to Lacey.

“Right. But you’re still dirt poor otherwise? Or no? You sold all the land? You rent your land? I’m confused about how you are socio-economically. You’re all astronomically beneath me and probably the majority of my entire legal family-of-origin socio-economically and I don’t have the patience to explain again.” says Lacey to Casi and her entire family from the moment they stepped foot in the U.S. until now. “At least that’s my understanding based on what I have gone over with a fine tooth comb for years and I’m baffled at your stupidity and possibly psychotic delusions of grandeur in comparison to me.”

“So you were just trying to intimidate me?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“Be more specific.” says Lacey. “And I’ll amend astronomical to astounding. Astronomical is an understatement.”

“When you’d write me.” says Casi to Lacey.

“When I’d write you?!? I NEVER WROTE YOU!” says Lacey to Casi in a panic because Casi sounds violent or genuinely psychotic.

“Oh come on! You wrote her! Right?!” Casi’s mom asks Lacey in fear that her daughter Casi actually is insane.

“No!! I was NEVER in contact with her in that way.” says Lacey to Casi’s mom.

“I wrote you pushy, mean girl comments and you responded to them. And you confronted me once about how rich you were. And you sent me perfume samples when my mom almost died and you let me think you might care that way. And you texted me and acted grossed out by me just trying to be a platonic friend to you!” says Casi (a.k.a. The Loudest Perfume Hater) to Lacey.

“I never implied I cared in a romantic or sexual way about you at all. It could have been misconstrued by you? If I let you think that or let you possibly misconstrue it it was partially out of emotional exhaustion…partially out of rage and partially out of a desire to not be offensive in a way we weren’t allowed to be in the United States of America.” says Lacey to Casi (a.k.a. The Loudest Perfume Hater).

“Oh wow! This is bad!” says Monika.

“So you never meant to imply you were interested in me sexually or romantically?” Casi asks Lacey.

“NO!!” says Lacey feeling I raped by Casi for being asked to clarify such an obvious no yet again.

“But you were so warm and sweet!” says Casi to Lacey. “I thought we had something special.”

“I’m sweet to everyone. Or I used to be. And no…I thought we were possibly friends. But only platonic friends.” says Lacey to Casi.

“But it wouldn’t have had to be just friends! It wasn’t to me!” says Casi to Lacey.

Lacey cringes but tries to be kind. “I’m not interested in you in that way at all. I find you entertaining. But possibly not in a way you’d want to be entertaining. I saw you as a buffoon but an endearing one. And I did care but not as any sort of lover of yours. It felt like you were wanting that maybe but people have often tried to molest or rape me or have my whole life. I’ve learned to get along with some of my rapists and develop a sort of comradery.” says Lacey to Casi (a.k.a. The Perfume Hater). “That being said, I wouldn’t recommend children being molested or other rape victims try to develop comradery. It’s dangerous to trust evil people.”

What Up Gangster by 50 Cent plays.

“Maybe astronomically superior to you isn’t an understatement.” says Lacey to Casi to correct any possible inaccuracies. “As in, I’m astronomically superior.” Lacey pauses in shock but then chooses to not contemplate it.

“I’m hurt!” says Casi to Lacey.

“Why?!?” Lacey asks Casi.

“You thought I was a joke.” says Casi to Lacey.

“You are a joke at best the way you act. Do you have a choice?” asks Lacey.

“Why did you humor me?!” asks Casi.

“Okay I’ll stop humoring you: DO YOU WANT ME TO SHOOT YOU?!” yells Lacey coldly with ladylike reserve. “WHAT IN HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME?”

“My family isn’t worth $10 million!” says Casi to Lacey.

“How much are they worth?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“$1 million.” says Casi to Lacey.

“Combined?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“No!” says Casi crying.

Lacey rolls her eyes. “I’m not going to rape the truth out of you.”

“Fuck! Fine! What do you think the truth is?!” Casi says to Lacey indignantly.

“No! I can’t control your conscience. I’m not you.” says Lacey to Casi.

“You’re me.” says Casi. “According to Buddhism.”

“No. I reject that lie in the name of Jesus Christ.” says Lacey to Casi.

“Which lie?” asks Chris Hayes wannabe mockingly of Lacey.

“The possible lie that Buddhism suggests that or the lie that I’m Casi?” asks Lacey of the Chris Hayes wannabe a.k.a. Mr. Blue.

“You’re Casi!” says the Chris Hayes wannabe to Lacey drooling with demons to try to curse Lacey.

“Okay! I’m taking over for now.” says Michael Rockefeller.

Skin and Bones by Cage The Elephant plays.

“Okay so. Honest question: How much is your family’s net worth as a clan?” Michael asks Casi.

“5 million! Why?!” says Mr. Blue laughing, high as a kite.

“No! It’s not. It’s $2 billion!” says Casi’s mom trying to be funny as she she laughs at Lacey or to get a sense of the situation.

“It’s $1 million net!” yells a man at Lacey.

“That’s not the answer I need. I need the truth!” says Nelson Rockefeller.

“I can’t protect her! I’m too corrupt?” asks the current Pope about Lacey and he’s possibly lying as he possibly often does.

“$700,000.00 net!” says Casi’s mom to Nelson Rockefeller.

“I don’t trust that the Illuminati found the right person or that she’s telling the truth.” says Lacey to Nelson Rockefeller.

“I can’t let you ask me that question!” says Dr. Moritz on the Casi Family’s behalf as if he’s their social worker.

“Why?” asks Lem Billings of Dr. Moritz.

“Because they’re happy people. And you’re sad. So we can kill you! Because we hate the life. We hate God.” says Dr. Moritz to Lacey.

“There’s no Illuminati! It’s all just ghosts attacking Lacey and she’s secretly married to me for eternity and she’s in love with me.” says Joe Kennedy Jr. to everyone.

“Joe, where are you!?” asks a Catholic nun.

“No! I’m Lem and I’m in Hell!” says a demon pretending to be Lem for Jack.

“Yeah! That’s actually Lem!” says Bobby Kennedy Jr. possibly in all sincerity.

“Joe where are you?!?” asks the Catholic nun of Joe.

“In Purgatory but it’s really Heaven in a way.” says Joe Jr. to the nun.

“Then you’re lying?” asks the Pope of Joe.

“I might be! I really, really might be. Yup! Yup!” says Joe Kennedy Jr. sounding annoyed.

“So…you’re worth how much?” Mr. Cologne 76 asks Casi.

“$3.” says Casi to Mr. Cologne 76.

“Then why are you up in here causing trouble?!” asks Mr. Cologne 76.

“You’re black!” says Casi to Mr. Cologne 76.

“$3. And then why are you genuinely like the Billings?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“Because you’re not really cool. And rich people are all cool. And Lem is cool. And I’m cool. And…that’s really all being elite is. It’s just about being cool.” says Casi.

“No! It’s not. That’s not entirely untrue but it’s also absolute nonsense.” says Lacey to Casi.

“Why did you embarrass me?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“That’s the problem. You’re so obnoxiously opaque. What in Hell are you referring to?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“When you wrote that blog post.” says Casi LLS Lacey is an idiot.

“How many times do I have to explain that that wasn’t about you directly.” says Lacey to Casi.

“Okay. Whatever.” says Casi.

“Right. So…you’re insane and it’s my fault?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“It was directed at lots of people but I can tell I’m included because it has to be?” says Casi.

“I was very angry at you. …I suppose emotionally it might have been you…mostly. But I chose with my free will to focus on everyone else when I wrote it. That does matter.” says Lacey.

“No! You have no free will. The Illuminati by faith in the power of Satan and potatoes in the 1800’s on my face declares you ours so help me Elmer Fudd and Satan.” says the Chris Hayes wannabe to Lacey Banks Billings. “Your thoughts and feelings can be examined and viciously attacked like a Jew during a Holocaust but worse because it’s the supernatural. And I’m still mysterious and powerful because it’s the super secret elite.”

“And I break those curses over me in the name of Jesus Christ.” says Lacey to all concerned. “I’ve been resisting them and fighting for my life and my family’s life daily since 2015.” she says to all concerned.

“The Illuminati does try to use demons and astral protection to kill, rape and murder people among other things.“ says a man in the Illuminati to all.

“Chris Hayes wannabe Wobbly started the day being outed as gay. He always interrupts Lacey and Lem having sex. I can’t fix this. Sorry!” a New Age man in the Illuminati says to the Chris Hayes wannabe.

“Is he gay or bisexual?” asks Lacey about Wobbly.

No one wants to answer.

“You’ve destroyed her life!” says an old money woman in the Illuminati to Mr. Blue about Lacey. “I can’t condemn you. But I can assure you I’m human and extraordinarily enraged. Mr. Blue, you invaded us.”

“And that’s why I am more elite!” says Casi to everyone.

“Why?” asks Michael Rockefeller of Casi.

“Because my life is more valuable than Lacey’s in the eyes of the world elite. Own it!” says Casi with calm joy.

“We can’t answer that.” says the Illuminati to Casi.

“You can’t?! Why?!” asks Casi.

“Because it would break the curse we put on Lacey and ruin our entire religious world.” says the Illuminati. “We were impressed that Lacey found us so easily but also egotistically threatened. So we decided to attack her. And…some elite people helped her and they shouldn’t have.” says the Illuminati. “We bet a lot of money around the world on Lacey being inferior to us and she’s mostly our extreme superior in most ways. She’s possibly illegitimate and our parents were more fit than us. Or we’ve destroyed the Earth with Satanism.”

Casi laughs. “I’m in charge. Right?”

“Of what Casi?” asks the Illuminati of Casi.

“The world!” says Casi to the Illuminati.

“I mean the way I see it is that by not standing up for yourselves you’ve lost to me.” says Casi.

“Lem. Why?!” asks Michael sadly.

“Because they’ve silenced me!!” yells Lem.

“Okay! Enough!” Lacey yells at the Illuminati. “No more toys!!!” she yells. “I’m done pretending like I’m your equal. …We’re all going to worship Christ or the Illuminati is canceled. And you’ll have to ask me how I want it to be in the eyes of Christ to recreate it. I refuse to keep humoring everyone’s stupidity. You’re all wrong. Christ is the only hope any human has.”

“Except how do you expect us to do that when it requires witchcraft?” asks the Illuminati of Lacey.

“Yes!! Excellent question!!” says Lacey. “I think the thing is is that you all know so much spiritually that it’s potentially dangerous to disband you. So…as much as you guys are very evil I worry that if you disband it’ll get even worse.” She laughs. “Like…they’ll be waring factions of people in a world depopulated and disconnected. No Internet. Not hospitals. No grocery stores. Not a shred of almost anything but fires, plagues, floods, famines, etc.. And so…what’s the point of totally ending the Illuminati then?”

“I agree! But it’s difficult to keep them regulated!” demands Michael Rockefeller of Lacey.

“I’m actually happily married!” says Casi suddenly out of nowhere.

“That’s good!” says Lacey.

“These are things that annoy me.” says Jim Dangle.

“What?!” asks Lacey.

“You don’t know how our organization works and then you take it over in self-defense.” Jim Dangle says to Lacey.

She laughs. “If my father was literally Tommy Banks it’s just second nature to me.”

“I’m going to disband you.” says Michael Rockefeller to the Illuminati.

“See! That’s why I’m in charge of the cool kid stuff. Because it’s cool to be cool!” says Casi getting intoxicated.

“Please disband the Illuminati safely.” says Lacey to Michael Rockefeller. “If possible.”

“We’ll only disband the Illuminati if the Lord wants us to.” says J. D. Rockefeller to Lacey kindly.

“So witchcraft is wrong?!” asks Casi in fear.

“Oh shut-up!” says Men Nennedy to Casi.

“Lacey you’re supposed describe each character in detail!” says a literary editor to Lacey. “Each character on your blog is supposed to be given a context. People reading this blog won’t know what to take from your word soup and it’s impossible to tell who people actually are. You’re a writer…but you don’t know how to write a sentence. And you’re clearly in line with me. And cheating with Chris Hayes.” She looks upset. “At least that’s what I as a hermeneutic doctor would say about the situation at hand. Because I’m full of shit. This blog…terrifies me.”

“That was a loving slur.” says Jim Dangle to the literary editor.

“I’m conjuring ALL OF THIS!” says Casi.

“How?!?” yells the literary editor at Casi.

“I’m great!” says Casi.

“Why do you want that much power? Why wouldn’t you rather have love and world peace?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“Are you going to bring world peace?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“No! I’m not! Are you going to as the Antichrist or no?” asks Lacey of Casi.

“No! I’m not.” says Casi.

“I hope not!” says Lacey.

“Time for bed!” says Lem.

“Goodnight! Lem is telling me we need to go to bed.” says Lacey.

“Go not go swiftly into the eternal night! Fight the fires on the bay. …Do not plunge. …It is but for merriment says I. I am a true king!” says John Lyth.

“Are you a valley girl?” asks Lacey of John Lyth.

“Hardly!” he says.

“Too bad it’s not just for merriment.” says Lacey.

“It is!” he says.

“Mm. That’s the Garden of Eden.” says Lacey to John Lyth.

“Maybe.” says John Lyth.

“Then yes. Worshipping God the way he intended was probably very merry. Hopefully we all will in Heaven again.” says Lacey.

“How much is your family worth?” Casi asks Lacey.

“It’s complicated. Truly. In some respects they’re worth Trillions of Dollars. Literally. In another respect they’re worth maybe a hundred million Dollars? Collectively. In another regard they’re terrifyingly priceless and will be for a long while unless the Earth is blown up.” says Lacey to Casi.

“How much should they be worth?!” asks Casi of Lacey.

“What do you mean?!” asks Lacey of Casi.

“Without the oil!” Casi says.

“Maybe 60 million or so.” says Lacey to Casi. “Combined. Maybe more. …So actually maybe it’s closer to $120 million Dollars net combined.”

“Do you hear the billionaires in the Illuminati scoffing at you?” says Casi to Lacey seriously. “I conjured them to warn you that I attack women in their sleep.”

“I rebuke you in Jesus’s name.” says Lacey. “Why do care about their net worth? Are you really that lost?”

“I just want to steal it.” says Casi.

“That’s pretty difficult!” says Lacey.

“They’ll help me!” says Casi about the scoffers in the Illuminati world.

“Then Putin will just invade us or if he’s betraying me we’ll have World War III or nuclear extinction.” says Lacey to The Loudest Perfume Hater or those channeling her to stack Lacey for psychotic, sociopathic reasons.

“So it’s worth trillions of Dollars.” says Casi’s mom.

“To the interests of the world, yes. And it’d be the end of the U. S. Government if you or any entity stole any part our land. Truly and fully.” says Lacey to Casi.

“So why didn’t you protect us from your terrifying power?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“I’m old money. I’m not sure you’ll empathize with it in a real way but I wasn’t fully aware of it. It was so overly downplayed and common in our family and circle of friends that it felt like no big deal. To me it was just the way it is and it was not a matter to consider that much. Just the way it is. …That being said…I tried to be anonymous. And in the ways I wasn’t I was acting in emotional self-defense.” says Lacey to Casi.

“Why do you collect cinnabar?” asks Casi of Lacey.

“You have no idea how Lacey thinks. Cinnabar is far from extraordinary but it’s hardly for riff raff dahling.” says Lem to Casi as he grows enraged.

“So your jewelry is worth about $50,000.00.” says a perfume hater to Lacey.

“Oh! You’re so obviously poor and disgusting it cracks me up. Right? The embattled and embroiled poor. Why do I have to be nice to you? I can’t stand you. You are going to get us all killed literally.” says Lem to the perfume community.

“Why light crude?” asks Mr. Cologne 76 to represent the level of intelligence of Lacey’s human adversaries in the blog post today.

“They invested in it. They shipped it into the ground in the 1800’s from China, left it there and then by 1970’s it emerged as light crude.” says Lem Billings to Mr. Cologne 76.

“So it’s their oil and not our oil?!” asks Mr. Cologne 76.

“It’s my oil. Or Michael’s.” says Lem Billings. “All the trillions in the ground. If God so desires.”

“You’re middle name is Lemoyne after Lemoyne College?” asks Mr. Cologne 76 of Lem Billings.

“My birth family and my actual family that raised me too…STARTED Lemoyne College. We FOUNDED that college.” says Lem. “I’m named after a relative, so to speak, with that exact name.”

“And Lacey’s birth family were silversmiths?” asks Mr. Cologne 76 of Lem.

“No. And yes.” says Lem. “They were and in a sense are world class, historically significant silversmiths in Norway who had a book written about them chronically their fine art of sterling silver.”

“And then on the same side their is an author?” asks Mr. Cologne 76’s wife of Lem.

“On my wife’s legal father’s side there’s a Knight of the Order of Saint Olav and that level of rare distinction and ethical honor in Norway and in the world in the history of humankind…is nothing to scoff at you angry white peasant.” says Lem to Mr. Cologne 76’s wife.

“I’m black!” says Mr. Cologne 76’s wife.

“Where did you go to college?” asks Lacey of Mr. Cologne 76’s wife.

“Umm…they can’t read that information or it’ll be used against us.” says the Illuminati to Lem and Lacey.

“The witches channeled her. …But you don’t want me to think you exist still but you do at the same time. …Your premise for attacking me and your methods are crude, evil and absurd and always have been.” says Lacey to the Illuminati.

“She may have gone to the University of something somewhere?” says a black female witch in the Illuminati.

“Hmm.” says Lacey.

“Spelman or Lemoyne. Which one?” asks Lem of Mr. Cologne 76’s wife.

“I suppose you started both of them?” she says.

“No, you’re so offensive! All of you are. It’s preposterous that would say that to me. Truly. Have you not sense of morality or common sense or virtue or history or dignity? You sound spiritually as though you’re flirting with me. I’m not going to acknowledge that bullshit as anything but the most obvious example of my heart getting away with me and assuming you had a human consciousness with a conscience.” says Lem. “Do you think and reason as a black woman who would have the ability to realize I don’t want her? Or are you a circus freak from Mars?” He laughs at the wife of Mr. Cologne 76. “You’re a crass, rude and disrespectful perfume wearer.”

“Actually my family started Spelman College.” says Michael Rockefeller to Mrs. Cologne 76.

“Why didn’t her family start a college then?!”ass Mrs. Cologne 76.

“We were the plantation owners of course!” says Lacey with a polite smile. “And actually we did start a college.” Lacey laughs.

“Which one?” she asks.

Lacey laughs. “I think it was called the School of Reason. Literally.” says Lacey. “My great uncle started it in the 1960’s or 70’s.”

“This was an actual school?!” she asks.

“Yes. …He was a brilliant man. A highly decorated and revered fighter pilot in World War II, a businessman and dentist. Father. Grandfather. But he was very eccentric. And extremely she’s of his time. So he started this school…” Lacey says smiling. “People thought he was crazy but he was so frighteningly aware.”

Mrs. Cologne 76 cries.

Lacey looks baffled.

“Okay. You’re a joke.” she says to Lacey.

“Why?!?” asks Lacey.

“You didn’t impress me.” says Mrs. Cologne 76 to Lacey. “I’m a Queen reincarnated!”

“That’s a lie I suspect.” says Lacey calmly.

“Well…how do you not get that I’m not like you?!” she asks hurt and incredulous.

“How do you not get that I’m not necessarily like you?! And it gets exhausting to be nice to self important people like you all the time?” asks Lacey. “A lot of you acted so superior to me in passive aggressive and hurtful ways often. You and your husband were and are so petty, jealous and disrespectful to me. Why can’t you just let go of your feelings of egotistical violence towards me? Or what exactly was I supposed to do? …I kind of doubt you have a right to attack me. But I’m curious.”

“You think I’m self-important?” she asks.

“Well…what gives you this extraordinary authority over me? So many people in the perfume community were kind and unlike the average person but as Casi polluted my posts and others joined her…and then you two started being catty I got lost. …You aren’t aristocratic people. Any of you. Few people are. …And as I fought for my life…I felt increasingly hurt by people’s annoying condescension.” says Lacey.

“I’m a god.” she says.

“Can you try to be serious?” says Lacey to Mrs. Cologne 76.

“I don’t think I can talk to you. We aren’t rich. And we don’t have a clue how to relate to someone as different from us as you.” says Mrs. Cologne 76.

“You’re middle class. A lot of people are actually. Well sadly less than before… Anyway, I don’t know what else to say to you either than. Unfortunately. But I guess that’s that sadly.” says Lacey.

“You’re nice!” Mrs. Cologne 76 says to Lacey.

“I try to be kind.” says Lacey. “I wish you well.”

As Lacey leaves Mrs. Cologne 76 says to her husband, “That did not go well.”

Lacey waits for them to leave and then turns to Lem.

“What does my evil look like?” she says. “Because it was horrendous talking to her.”

“It was.” says Michael. “They’re all such jerks..to you.” he says in a sniveling, silly voice in imitation of Becca, Lacey’s faux best friend in college.

“I tried to put her in her place and she wouldn’t budge.” says Lem to Lacey.

“Was Becca black?!” asks Mrs. Cologne 76 stalking them.

“No!“ says Lacey. Then turning to Lem, “I’m so lost.”

“I know. You always do.” he says to her.

“I can’t grasp it!” says Lacey.

“Let’s just let God explain what Spelman is. I don’t think she has any respect for white families who start black colleges.” says Michael.

“Yes! Fascinating.” says Lacey.

“Goodnight.” says Lem grabbing Lacey to go to bed.

—