Fun And Games

Jazz Suite No. 2 plays.

Lacey had a miserable time of it.

Imagine her back at another holiday party the Harfords attended in Eyes Wide Shut. She sits in an upstairs bedroom, the same one she rested in before. …Except this time David Rockefeller walks by and feels drawn into the room. Because…you know? Illuminati stuff.

Who…are you?!” he asks Lacey.

“Lacey.” she says cheerfully.

He thinks.

“Do I know you?!?” he asks, confused.

“No! I can’t imagine you do.” she says equally cheerfully, with an added apology in her tone.

He laughs to himself.

“Lovely party!” says Lacey thoughtfully.

He smiles at her fondly.

“You don’t seem like most young women your age.” he says matter-of-factly and yet also in a rather eerie manner.

“Oh! I’m told that that often!” she says in abstract contemplation, and yet still cheerfully. “I’m sorry if I have terrible manners.” she adds with sincere, hidden reverence for God.

“Hmm.” he says sadly, yet with a smile.

She listens patiently.

Carmen Suite No. 2 by Bizet plays.

“I have a cousin who died…who would have thought you were gorgeous.” He looks sad. Almost cries. “Too bad you weren’t born just a little earlier in the 20th Century.”

Lacey worries.

“Oh! I wish I’d been born far earlier than I was!” she says. “It’s been-I’ve always loved the past!”

He looks at her, horrified. He looks around the room she’s in. Then he calms himself.

“Well! We can’t choose when we’re born! Right?!?” he says to her.

Lacey knows what he means. She’s rendered speechless.

“I’m not the sort of person to make a mistake about when I was born.” says Lacey with sadness. “But of course, I’m not God.”

“You don’t believe in reincarnation?” he asks, sitting down in a chair in her room.

“It would have to be in Christianity!” she insists.

He smiles and nods. “My cousin, Michael, was studying a group of aboriginal people on an island who worshipped Christ after being forced to by white people.” he says laughing. “Like us.”

“We were forced to worship Christ by white people?” asks Lacey.

He looks at her with a facial expression like he feels slightly bullied.

“No! I meant wethe white people…forced them.” he says.

Lacey uncontrollably glares at him. “Was that evil?” she asks.

He looks worried again. “I…doubt it.” he says, cowering slightly.

“Do you think reincarnation is in the Bible?” asks Lacey.

He thinks.

Masquerade Suite: I. Waltz plays.

“I doubt it.” He thinks. “Why?”

“Maybe I was there! And I can guarantee you that they desperately tried.” says Lacey.

He looks at her puzzled.

“They desperately tried to be loving. …Profoundly loving!” says Lacey. “If I have to hear one more INSULT to the British and their efforts to bring GOD to the world I’m going to start World War III.” she says. “Or-That’s-No-That’s not quite right.” she says sweetly, calming herself, in sudden shock. “No! Because I can’t start World War III. I can’t do it.” she says laughing to lighten the mood. “No. I just mean…they brought a sort of…”

He begins subtly rocking himself back and forth in his chair. He nods and smiles.

“Peaceful, genuinely Godly hegemony to the world. Through the genuine power of the one true God. Jesus Christ. …I doubt I was lucky enough to be there. But…if He allowed me to come back…I still wish I was there.” she says. Then she looks out the window.

“Why would you have come back?” he asks cagily.

“Why? Because people were hurt! Because no empire is ever truly Heaven. Because people suffer. Evil is everywhere. And sometimes good men make great things seem stupid.” says Lacey. “The British were weak and evil at times. But they did a far better job running the world than the Americans have.”

He cries.

“Was Michael there with you?” he asks.

Lacey feels tied up into knots.

“Is reincarnation in Christianity?” she asks.

“If…it is…and I’m not saying it is…was he there?!?” he asks.

Lacey fights back tears. Are they real? She doesn’t know.

“Someone was. Some handsome, blond, blue-eyed man. And I was madly in love with him.” says Lacey.

He laughs. Smiles. “Maybe reincarnation isn’t in the Bible, but you’d have loved Michael.”

“What did Michael look like?” asks Lacey.

He looks at her like she’s teasing him.

It shocks Lacey. No one ever catches her humor.

Lovers From The Past by Mareux plays.

“Are you reading my mind?” she asks bravely.

“Yeah!” he says in confession.

“How?” she asks.

He looks her in the eyes.

“Are we related?” she asks stupidly, in shock. This time she isn’t trying to be funny.

He raises his eyebrows.

“Oh dear, I’m not trying to be funny this time, at least.” she says.

“Michael should be here, Lacey.” he says. “I’m not…supposed to be here.”

She looks at him. Squints. Smiles.

“Oh dear! That reminds me of Sabrina! With Audrey Hepburn.” says Lacey.

“Yes! That’s the right reference. …What direct connection do you have to that film?!?” he asks.

“It’s my favorite film. …Humphrey Bogart is one of my favorite male actors…” says Lacey.

“Could you have known Humphrey Bogart?” he asks.

She squints. “Didn’t he die before I was born?”

“I bet your father knew him? Or your father’s friends? …How old is your father?” he asks.

Lacey stares. She blinks.

“Who is my father? Do you know?” asks Lacey.

His breathing quickens. He half panics.

Warning Sign by Coldplay plays.

“Does anyone come to mind?!” he asks.

“Yes! But it’s odd.” says Lacey.

He calms himself.

“Who?” he asks.

“A man named Thomas Banks.” says Lacey.

Drive by Warpaint plays.

He takes a deep break and leaves the room without saying a word. Lacey feels he’s scared. She worries she’s offended him. So she collects herself, goes downstairs and finds him in a crowd of well-dressed people.

He looks at her with ruddy face, in fear.

“I’m sorry! Did I offend you?” she asks.

He takes a deep breath. Smiles. Takes another deep breath.

“You’re here on business?” he asks her.

“How am I supposed to respond to that?” she asks.

“Just tell me what you really think.” he says.

“Yes! I can’t stand this county!” she says.

“Do you want us to shoot you in the head?!” he and matter-of-factly.

“Oh! Like a Kennedy?!? How…insulting!” she says bitingly.

He looks at her concerned. “Why do you hate this country?!”

“It’s idiotic!” she says in growing rage.

He closes his eyes. Sighs. “So you’re a traitor to the cause?”

“There’s nothing wrong with the crown. And we have no idea what we’re really doing!” she says.

Dark Days by Local Natives plays.

“That’s not very patriotic!” scolds J. Epstein, approaching them then.

“You’re Jewish!” says Lacey.

His face falls. He blinks. Looks shocked. Raises his eyebrows. Looks angry.

“What?! You’re going to declare war on me!?! I’d love to see you try!” says Lacey. Then she thinks. “Actually, I wouldn’t. You’d be decimated, you poor thing.”

He giggles. Covers his mouth with both of his hands.

“It isn’t funny. I know you! You’re a villain!” says Lacey.

He calms himself. Calculates.

“So! You’ll slaughter me?!” he asks.

“What?! You’re trying to guilt me over the Holocaust?! …It wasn’t me! I wasn’t there!” she looks at him. “You’re a psychopath! Aren’t you? You conniving snake-man!” she says triumphantly.

“You’d like to lock me up?!” he asks, giving-in.

“You shouldn’t have been born. …Poor Hasidic people. Having to raise you!” she says. “You’re not just Jewish. You’re their worst enemy! You sir…are the TRUE traitor.”

“How old are you?!? You little LIAR!!!” he says, losing his temper.

“102!!!” she yells.

He nods self-righteously.

“And yet you are 28?!” he says.

“How old are you?!?” she asks. “200?!”

He looks offended. Almost cries.

“You’re conflating things to con the American people!” she says suddenly pointing at him. “You have to be the most tragic man here.” then she drops her hand and loos at him in sudden dismay.

He looks odd.

“Don’t kill yourself!” she says.

“I’m not 200!” he says bitterly.

“That doesn’t mean there isn’t God.” says Lacey. Then she walks forward. Suddenly turns around, dramatically. “I command you! Be honorable! In the name of Christ, I command you! Bow before the thrown of Christ! NOW!!” she says, catching everyone’s attention at the party.

He gets on his knees and bows.


A partygoer who has royal ties to an old European family claps his hands in agreement with Lacey.

“Don’t…mock me!!” says Lacey in seething rage.

The all pause in shock.

Lacey laughs in glee. She takes a deep breath.

“Do you want to spend eternity in Hell?” she asks everyone calmly.

“No!” says a child.

“I’m not as worried about you! Keep praying to God. It’s Jesus Christ you’re praying to who hears you and cares.” she says.

She sighs.

“Don’t kill me. You’ll regret it. And don’t harm anyone innocent instead. You’ll regret that too.” she says.

“We have no idea what you’re talking about!” says an American actress smugly. She’s implying Lacey is insane.

“That’s sad. …I’m not insane. You know that you ugly, aging bitch!” says Lacey. “You whore? You…peasant? You…worm?!” says Lacey. “Or what? You con artist.”

They all stand in silence.

“Eternity isn’t Wall Street. Don’t let Satan fool you.” she says. “Be at peace, peasants. Be good. Worship God. The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. The one true God. Jesus is His name. The Holy Trinity. The Father, The Son and the Holy Spirit. There is no other God before Him. Including any of you. …Don’t fool yourselves into Hell.”

Then she walks to the main door.

“I shall leave. This is far too awkward. But do not challenge me. I am but human and I do like war.” she says. Then she leaves.

Dollars and Cents plays.

A sweet witch in the Illuminati feels empathy.

“She’s so confused!” she says telepathically.

Actually, they’ve all been chatting telepathically the whole time. Some in fear. Some in disdain.

“I love her!” say the Freemasons.

“Why?” ask the French.

“She’s one of us!” the Boomer Freemasons say sadly.

David smiles.

“She’s got to be lying.” says a liberal.

“Yeah!” says Donald Trump.

“Hey! Can I have your scarf?!?” J. Epstein asks a woman near him.

The woman looks at him confused. But she hands him the scarf.

“I’m not going to be toasted by radiation! I don’t like the thought of being sick that way! Okay?!? You all can do whatever you want! I’m saying my prayers and killing myself!” he says, climbing the stairs.

“We’re not at war!” says David.

“How often do these people actually understand anything?!” Jeff responds to him telepathically.

“Why was she even here?!” scoffs an American high-society hostess.

“She had gardening questions.” says a gay man placidly.

London Blues by Jelly Roll Morton plays.

“Yeah right! She’s a prostitute!” says a high-ranking female Democrat like a conspiracy theorist extraordinaire.

Upstairs J. Epstein laughs at the female Democrat as he dies.

Moments later, as Lacey rides in her Uber to her hotel room the ghost of J. Epstein appears to her.

“You’ve got to stop expecting narcissists to apologize. They generally never do.” he says to Lacey before being drug away by angels to his fate. “Okay!” he says to the angels in astounding respect and fear.

“He’s dead!” yells a Democrat moments later as she finds him hanging upstairs at the party.

“Ha! Huh..” says David, nodding his head. “Yes! Perilous times ahead!” he says.

“Oh David! Don’t be so jolly!” says a new money society woman sarcastically as she rolls her eyes.

He looks terrified. Then he collects himself. “You know…let’s be nice! Let’s be kind!” he says as people come undone although they hide it.

“You can’t possibly believe all this superstitious nonsense?!” says a new money billionaire.

“No! And Jeff didn’t either.” says a Ghislaine.

“No! None of us do! She’s crazy!” says a Walton seriously and sincerely.

“Well…let’s be kind then!” says David.

A woman who married into royalty scoffs in haughty terms at the idea of Lacey being a human even.

“I hate her too!” says Summertime Sadness. “On behalf of God! …The real God! Not this Catholic wizard they all worship with holy water and prayers to Mary.”

“Ah! Who are we channeling?!” asks a woman in the old money of the U. S..

“Some…Tik Tok star?!?” says a Muslim.

“Tik Tok?” asks Bill.

“He must be a Vaudevillian actor!” says the Muslim man with disdain.

“Ah yes! They were great in their time!” says the woman merrily, trying to relate to the perceived dead performer.

“I don’t think…he likes…Lacey.” says Niles Craine.

“Oh dear! Putin just invaded Ukraine.” says a diplomat.

“No matter! We’re all fine!” says a Biden. “She’s just a bitch! I’m not worried.”

“Umm…wait. What?” asks a Billionaire Millennial who married an Asian doctor.

David begins having anxiety attacks. He forces himself to take deep breaths.

The entire Romanov family confronts Lacey in her hotel bathroom.

“You wanted gardening tips?” asks Tsar Nicholas II of Lacey.

“Yes! I was sent to the party by the Gardening Club Federation of America. “But I really loved exploring that house.”

Alexandra nods emphatically and empathetically wearing a long string of pearls. She looks sad.

“You’ll be fine.” says Nicholas.

“That doesn’t sound good.” says Lem Billings laying on Lacey’s bed.

“Who’s he?” asks Lacey.

“Kirk Lemoyne Billings!” says Tsar Nicholas.

“Oh! You were friends with JFK! I’ve read about you!” says Lacey.

“Michael and David are in the lobby!” says Maeve, walking through Lacey’s hotel room door.

“Kennedy or Rockefeller?!” asks Tsar Nicholas.

“Rockefeller.” says Maeve.

“Oh! David must have just died!” says Nicholas.

“Yes! So did I!” says Maeve.

“Hi!” says Joe Jr. cheerfully, walking through a wall. “I’ll be taking over

“I was sad!” says a lovely, sad blond young woman appearing in the corner of the room suddenly.

Lacey is worried about her.

“You’re not supposed to be dead!” says Joe Jr. to the blond girl.

“So much for being nice!!” yells David Rockefeller at Lacey as he marches down the hallway past her room. “We’re done!!!”

Maeve runs off to warn her grandfather about what she’s just witnessed.

“I’m sorry. I died before I was supposed to!” the blond girl to Lacey. Then she disappears.

Michael storms in the room.

“I’m Michael Rockefeller!” he says.

“Nice to meet you, Micheal.” says Lacey

“Hey! I was here first!” genuinely protests Lem.

“We might have get along to help Lacey.” says Mike, sitting down to deal with Lem.

Back at the party.

“The WHO just declared a pandemic. …Did Jeff turn on us? After he died?!” asks an American actress.

“David died too!” says Lem to Lacey.

“Lem…I’m in love with you. But I’m in love with Michael too.” says Lacey.

He smiles.

“David? Rockefeller, Koch or Kennedy?” asks Tsar Nicholas II with a clipboard. Babe Paley also holds a clipboard.

“They’re going to try to murder her.” says J. P. to everyone before disappearing.

“Rockefeller.” says Maeve before disappearing again.

“Hello!!” says Rose Kennedy in a silly voice before disappearing playfully.

“Did you get all that?” Tsar Nicholas asks Babe.

“Yes! Thank you!” says Babe.

“Hey!! EVERYONE!!! Let’s chat!” says a Tucker. “All alive in Christ in Lacey’s room! Let’s talk!”


“Can you hear me?!?” he asks.

A Catholic priest is on hand with this man named Tucker.

“I think it’s Purgatory!” says the priest scientifically.

“So…Fox News…is our last hope as a country?!” asks a liberal feminist Tik Tok star. She thinks. “All I can say is WOW!”

“Happy birthday!” Lacey says wearing red lipstick and Youth Dew.

More later.