“Smobbly and Wobbly need to stop pretending that hearing their father’s voice means absolutely anything to them. Lacey translated because that’s how her brain works. She can almost see me.
it Lem was talking it sounded exactly like him and so was their father and they pretended to be so moved by it last night.” said Sinead.
Later.
“Yeah, it was my house.” says Wobbly.
“But it was only your house because I let it be. And I could’ve forced her mother to have an abortion before you were born if I was tired.” says Bobby Sr..
“It was really my house!” says Joe Sr..
Later.
Turns out the perfume community ruined Chanel No. 22 genuinely. And Coco Chanel herself is devastated.
“ if I know, Frank and I just like to say, don’t expect her to be your friend in heaven, she might be your sister, but she’s not going to be your friend.” says Louis. “ you need to get on your flipping hands and feet and repent profoundly for your narcissism and cruelty to Lacey before you ever even peek knowledged by her in anyway at all. The garlands are siding with Chanel if you dream of dying, and being there friend someday because of your grand expertise think again, Lacey deserved a heck of a lot more respect when it came to that particular perfume at the very least.”
“Casi had no flipping conception at all what Chanel 22 was in any way!” says a livid Sinead. “That was Lacey‘s noblesse oblige talking to Casi 100%. That’s all it was, it was just noblesse oblige. And that that’s good from from Lacey that’s kindness. And you had no respect for that, and then you just stole perfume from her that was really her last link to the life that God has given her.”
“Lacey just ran downstairs and smelled Chanel 22. It’s not Covid, she can still smell it. The part that was dry and airy and lovely that I intended to be there because I’m Coco Chanel herself…and I actually did control over a few in a way that people don’t today. That was my composition Casi you don’t understand it at all. No one in the perfume community does, and what you’re smelling is what Lacey is now smelling or you’re smelling something different. The thing is maybe this is too smart for your brains to understand so try.
Your personality affects how you perceive the notes in regard to which notes you focus on. To Lacey right now Chanel 22 smells like toilet cleaner literally.” says Mlle. Chanel.
Far later.
Turns out, Franny (Franni) comes from a impoverished family, that she refuses to admit, may have been Jewish. She was a trophy wife it’s not a joke. And her Harvard degree masks a strong Jewish community that may have actually sheltered and enabled her mother and her siblings to survive. Because it’s highly unlikely that a G.I. Bill and and Social Security benefits would’ve kept six kids alive…as that was before LBJ was ever President if you know what I mean, and hopefully you do because I can’t spout it off the top of my head but that was before a lot of government programs existed, if I’m not mistaken. What’s more likely is that they all went through extreme poverty to the point where Franny (as we know her) is not herself and she’s nothing more than a façade or they had some sort of community that helped them survive.
“ she sounds like me I’m not like I come across like I’m old money or I grow up in the suburbs but the truth is that’s just bullshit and I actually may be really am poor well I was poor I’m middle-class now, but I was raised poor I’m not old money like Lacey. I lie through my teeth and I’m not entirely mentally well, and I have empathy for her but I wonder if I if she’s a little sick.” says Nancy.
“ she being Franny or Lacey?!” asks Lem.
“ it should be obvious I meant Franny, sorry.” says Nancy.
“ Why are you sorry? Is that code for this? Is it true?!” asks Lacey.
“no no I really think Fern is probably a pretentious asshole bitch!” says Nancy.
“ do you know Lacey makes really good pies Franny and she’s been my wife and I’ve been the governor of Maine or Massachusetts. She would’ve made pies for everyone homemade Kennedy pies and everyone would’ve loved it because she actually is genuinely loving and you’re not.” says Joe Kennedy Jr.. “ Lacey is brilliant in a way that you’re not. Did you sleep your way in to Harvard you little whore because my wife could’ve run the world you may have caused this entire problem because you’re nothing more than a little fuck bunny and a short skirt. So you’re fucked arrange a hybrid and then you’re fucked your way into him and then you got time to make pies wink wink.”
“ height I did challenge that whole theory that she could possibly have talk to Joe because I just think it’s bullshit. I don’t think you know I just thought it was stupid because it’s like I don’t even say that anyone could say that.” says Franny.
“ that’s true but they’re not all Thomas banks, daughter, and Lacey really could be no that’s the problem she really could be his real daughter I don’t know the most people could say that like she can say that actually no one alive may be able to say that um, and it all honesty, she can almost say that because she is very close to proving using science that that that he is her father meeting the Anne and all that or should I and find out what he’s OK but that’s the problem Credit she’s not you she’s not just anybody no one will think she fucked her way into Hartford and if they did, I think she’d be insulted but I mean she won’t be as insulted as you are for reason.” says a scientist.
“ so is your wife a Golddigger? Yeah friend is a Golddigger which is why you thought Lacey was because you don’t want to be honest about your wife, right?” says Sinesd. “ all that bullshit about how brilliant Van Ness Grant Hart is about Lacey not Fanny or Franny excuse me. Your wife seems like a bitch bimbo who are times has moments where she kind of gets it in Plaza Long and it’s nice but at heart honey, she’s a gold digging whore. So the problem is you are a liar. Do you know that you’re married to a bitch narcissistic Golddigger and you lie about it did you discover it when you became senator or do you do you did you did you did you did you don’t even know? Because you want to live in the delusional world women like Lacey couldn’t exist really are like what you pretend she is. There could never be your woman. Who’s that beautiful who would sleep with me who really is that kind and smart and warm and loving it will never been alcoholic no matter what you put her through out of love for her children. The problem is Al Franken. Lacey is that person and they were other women like that too or definitely equal to your wife some of them might be you know golddiggers but they’re not quite that ridiculous. Some of it might be as attractive as your faith was before she cut all her hair off And I know there’s still better people and they’re smarter and kinder more wonderful. So I think you want to live in a delusional world L where your wife is like Lacey and she’s not. I think you’re a narcissist all who wants to think he never makes mistakes and then he could be mad you live with a total fucking bitch. Your wife is a horrid stupid bitch L Franken. She may be the reason you won the Senate seat, but she may also be the reason why you lost it. And that’s the problem you wanna live in a delusional world either because you’re a narcissist or because because it’s too painful to admit that she’s really not that great of a person she being your wife Franny no one else.
You heard Franny sob story she broke your bloody hearts, and then you thought damn, I must love this woman for the rest of my life she needs my help. And instead of admitting, I’m a real small guy I was softy and a narcissist both he’s concocted the story where she is the princess of the universe. Her father was Thomas Banks, and he got into politics because it was a family business and she’s hot and sexy except she’s not like some people and that’s good and so then she was but she’s not anymore because she really was just putting on a lot of make up and faking it in a way but not entirely and then crap. I think you’re delusional L Frank and I think you’re totally delusional and I think that’s part of what happened if you had anything to do with the chaos of the last seven years Franken, I think you really are delusional. I think you’re very delusional bad because it’s too painful to admit that that you’ve lived a life you’ve actually lived.”
“ so you think his wife is a trophy wife?” says Al Franken about himself.
“ it’s just a fact because she was way out of your league but I think about it OK she was at least out of your league to some degree she was out of your league. OK she was if she came from poverty she was actually way out of your league. If she come from some wealth, which is what she seemingly was insisting for a while, which is kind of psychotic to do… at least in and in response to me in the conversations I was having with her… she’s a ditz you married a ditz I don’t know if she slept her way into Harvard or what the fuck happened to me she seems like a ditz and coming from the poverty she came from at the time she went to Harvard. it says it’s weird it’s suspicious. And it makes me wonder if his wife Freddy really was actually one of those people who spread her legs and got into Harvard. Sorry if she’s smarter than that but in my conversations with her, she’s been an idiot. So I guess she proved herself then she thought necessarily I don’t know maybe she didn’t sleep her way maybe she didn’t. Maybe she worked away but it’s just weird because she doesn’t seem quite as intelligent as that would require her to be coming from her poverty. In which case why is she poor or is that a lie and her family is profoundly evil? Or it was if that story is correct and she actually was an impoverished sad woman then no it seems as though maybe it’s a little weird that she went to Harvard if I’ve actually been talking to her. In which case a doll if she can sleep her way into Harvard and look as hot as she did, especially considering what she looks like but she’s aged she could’ve married someone probably better than you socially Al Franken.
Minnesota boys love to pretend that their wives are innocent angels, especially the more money they have Louis was that way, if I’m illegitimate my father was that way with my mother who brought me into this world not but not Rita seemingly. Know most men in Minnesota like to bury bitches, and then pretend like they’re angels. To find anyone to marry me, I had to outsource a man from Connecticut, who only lived in Minnesota for a few years, and therefore still had his head screwed on straight in that way.
So he screwed her and lost his mind because she was probably the hottest piece of ass that he’s ever experienced in his entire life. Was it love it first sight very much so probably for both of them she found her knight in shining armor who actually really loved her for who she was as much as he was capable. And and he found his hot as heck dream girl, who wasn’t necessarily his ideal…necessarily…
Necessarily? Yes, why yes… it’s far more likely that he wants an incredibly complicated very difficult to comprehend woman who is a sex god or goddess who can make all of his dreams come true maybe if he just makes her happy enough he wants someone to torture him I don’t think he wants someone who is the way he describes his wife as being, necessarily. And the same as a woman like Lacey have been totally thrown out.” says Lacey. “ maybe not killed even at a boarded button other than for her kids I don’t know maybe she’d rather have been aborted.”
“ her kids are alive and you don’t get to decide whether not she lives or dies. At this point that’s up to God and me I’ve got allows me too I just want to make that clear in case if you’re getting your teeth ready to bite her like a white trash cannibal.“ says Lem.
“So Franny really is just jealous of her and so is Aaron.” says a Bush.
“So…you, Al Franken, concocted a bullshit story – after stealing my wife’s possible spirit energy to win the Senate seat – about how Lacey was a goal digging useless bitch and then she almost ended up dead. We have a pandemic we have World War III we have the nation in peril also that your beloved Franny could maintain a delusion and so could you that you’re Louis and Lacey…or Hal and Lacey Loeb or Joe and Lacey if only…or Michael Rockefeller marrying a poor hundred millionaire from Minnesota. Or a very mysterious couple who no one quite understands…like Lacey and Lem.” says Lem.
“ so the problem is Franny and your husband who who really are you? Who are you? Because you’re not Lacey Franny you’re really not an L you’re not Michael Rockefeller just a little shorter and Jewish.” says Joe. “ with a far better sense of humor.”
“ so if I had been alive and I went to Harvard to if I had met Lacey we might’ve looks like you and your wife when you were young I would’ve been proud to have her next to me just like you were you look ecstatic almost embarrassed by how proud you are to have her on your arm.” says Michael Rockefeller.
“ why the fuck did you think you knew me, Frannie and Al Franken or any of you?” asks Lacey.
“ I think you thought that your wife had proven herself by spreading her legs or whatever the hell it is that she had to do to go to Harvard and he thought why didn’t this dumb bitch do the same fucking thing you called her lazy and hated her fucking guts for seven years and then you spent the last four nights, keeping her awake thinking that you would finally be able to kill her with sadness over you know what were you what I was at your plan? The problem is you don’t know Lacey even if you slept with her if she been porn earlier, she has it in her head that you were still married Franny.” says Thomas Banks.
“ so let’s find out what really happened that huh?” says Reta.
“ I think you found a way to use my identity to win that campaign. I’m not sure how you did it and that’s sad. The truth is that if I’ve been born earlier, you would’ve been able to do it even if I gave my virginity to you in high school. I don’t know how but I just really doubt it. I might’ve ended up married to Lem. And I love how you accuse me of possibly a heroin addict. You really don’t understand me at all. No I think I would’ve slept with you give me my virginity never gotten pregnant because we both of been extraordinarily careful. So I never would’ve been 100% sure that it was safe to get pregnant with your child. And then, yeah, it’s actually a fascinating story because I really think it could be real. I’m not positive. I’m not God, but I have a very strong suspicion that you would’ve throwing me under the bus, convinced that I was a piece of shit under your fucking shoe.” says Lacey.
“ why did he break up with you? You never really told me entirely actually you might you would have eventually would’ve pulled it out of you, but what happened?” asks Lem.
“ Saint Mr. blue this is why when you talk to people telepathically the way that you did you have to be careful because there is a spiritual world that we’re living in. That’s just a little hint from a psychic in the illuminati OK?” says a psychic.
“ no I was the actual, wealthy, aristocratic, old money, brilliant, warm, loving, pie making motherly gorgeous woman from Minnesota. He would have dated me an alternate universe, possibly most of our adolescence, and then, as we got older, he would’ve gotten it in his head and so goodbye to some degree but not as much as him that we should sleep together. And then he would’ve gotten the idea into his head that he needed to expand his horizons. And a girl like me who would stay in Minnesota and go to school and try to settle down and marry and have kids was really not his speed after all. And so, dear Ellen Franken goes off to Harvard and finds Franny and his parents may not have liked that. They might’ve liked Lacey a lot better. But he wouldn’t have cared about his parents opinion all that much, not in the face of true life and all that. So what do you have given a shit that Lacey ran off to New York used her family connections to find friends that had interesting friends who were a lot older and who she ended up fucking Anne fucking Mark with I don’t know. She doesn’t fuck with him the first night she meets him like he fucks Franny the first night he met her, probably and get money out of the deal necessarily because her father already had a lot of money and honestly know they probably get some but they’re not she has a 20 million in today’s money and then a Lem’s provides her with 6 million so they’re only worth 26 million they’re not astronomically rich Lacey is not a Golddigger because she couldn’t Mary Louis and had a lot more or someone else.”
“ so what is he angry about that Lacey and I are fucking each other in New York and a lot older than him and taller and worth 26 million and he can’t touch me or his ha excuse me my father will slit his throat and his wife’s and their kids to if he needs to protect his daughter and my kids to or is he angry about something else because I’m just wondering are you just jealous that I’m fucking your first love. Did you even love her at all? I don’t think you have a new or I think you knew how wonderful she was but I’m not convinced that you knew her, did you know not the way you handled it? I’m not convinced that you did. I think you knew her and you knew she wasn’t a horrible, liar necessarily, but did you actually know her you might’ve fucked with her and really lost her self slightly slightly, and even moved her kind of but she’s, she’s really good in bed she’s really good in bed so the quality of the sex doesn’t necessarily indicate the level of your love so you might’ve left a little, but did you really love her like did you really know her you were her friend you knew, but did you really know her maybe not did you find yourself at Harvard with Benny or not? Are you still finding yourself with Franny your ‘life partner’?!” asks Lem.
“ yeah are you jealous of the men Lacey slept with after you, even so, even though you’re not really in love with her the way that you are with your wife?” asks Michael.
“ what’s interesting is that she does sleep with people apparently in the 20th century 21st but she does it because that’s how we organized it in the United States and she wants romantic love and it’s not her ideal. It’s not gods ideal so the thing is if you’re not supposed to sleep with people outside of marriage this could be why because she can MoveOn because her heart intent was to try to find a husband if she’s being honest. A real husband not just a man who she can call her husband true love in marriage. And you hate that right? You hate that that’s what it is it isn’t what does that mean that she can move on because you said I’m a piece of shit I’m going to Harvard fuck you and then what does that mean? She goes OK see you later and falls in love with me or lamb or Harold and that’s the problem. Does that mean that she loves you but maybe not as much as you thought she did, so are you sadistic and you enjoyed taking her virginity, thinking the sun is in love with me or what?” asks Louis.
“ no I don’t think I knew her. But I think I probably did sleep with her. I am I think I probably would have him. I had to face the fact that I was a little too ambitious. And cutthroat. I doubt I doubt that I would’ve slept with her thinking that I was sadistically torturing her. I hope I hope I’m not that much of an asshole. If I am then yeah OK I might’ve enjoyed the thought that she was madly in love with me, and then I was just a little in love with her and more in love with her body. And I might’ve had some plan to have married her or something…or I might not have thought about it at all. So yeah, when she sleeps with other men, it does piss me off because then I have to be honest about what I did to myself. Hi maybe loves hurt just a little and I did lose my virginity to her and you’re right I would’ve had to face the fact that that meant some thing.” says Al Franken.
“ does she cry over him or not?” asks a liberal journalist.
“ oh, you mean you mean Lacey does Lacey cry over him no no she does not know she doesn’t know she does not. She tells her self all cry after the next guy I sleep with, so is the next person I sleep with doesn’t love me then I’ll cry but if he does love me then I’m just gonna think oops I shouldn’t have slept with him. That was a bad idea.” says Lem.
“ like she shouldn’t have slept outside of marriage, or that she shouldn’t have slept with him?” asks a woman.
“ that’s something she would’ve had to figure out and try to figure it out there. Either way do I have to worry about this or not?” says Lem.
“ so she would’ve literally refused to let herself cry and then she would’ve thought I’m gonna wait and see what happens. Oh my word so that if she slept with Louis or slept with you or found, Michael Rockefeller said that she could cry it’s that she refuses to let herself?” asks a psychologist.
“ yeah because it’s gonna hurt like heck and she doesn’t wanna bother experience in that pain unless if it’s necessary.” says Lem.
“ so does Freddy steal him or not?” asks Batgirl III.
“ oh, you know I just clarify some thing else first she’s not a Dars assist and she also wouldn’t sleep with tons of people. I don’t think people understand the calculus that Lacey doesn’t her brain with everything she’s brilliant if you’re not stop comparing yourself to her you lose unfortunately for you. However, her in a way to. It’s it’s it’s very likely that he would’ve left for Harvard thinking that they were hot chicks there that he wanted to fuck and that he learned something from sleeping with Lacey but that it just wasn’t the end of his sewing of wild oats, Lacey’s family is extraordinarily rich And being her serious boyfriend, he would’ve had an F Scott Fitzgerald experience, except not his actual experience, the one that he wanted.
The one where he sleeps with the girl who is better than him socially, and then really is faithful and loving, except the thing is that South Scott Fitzgerald. An ice suspect how do you spell Franken was married to Lacey and alternate universe so to speak that’s even possible that he would have done the opposite. He would’ve thought oh I know something now about sex and politics and money people and if I go to Harvard, I can get in bed with some really hot chicks.” says Lem. “ because Lacey is hot, but if she was platinum blonde was slightly larger boobs she might be a little hotter and the thing is Lacey was always just a tiny bit taller than him. So he saw the hot chicks with bigger boobs who was mildly like Lacey, but then he realize they’re not actually as pretty as her. And he thought I don’t know if Lacey looked like that or if they looked like Lacey and then had the same boobs and hair I don’t know if I’d even really be that interested. And then he saw Franny who shorter than him and still was beautiful when she was young, not as beautiful as Lacey, but beautiful. Any thought to himself ‘I don’t give two shits about the fact that this woman isn’t as beautiful as Lacey. I just want to fuck the shit out of her and I don’t even know why.” says Lem. “See I am tall, but in reality, I actually might have kind of a thing for petite women. So Lacey is 5 ft. 7 in heels she’s taller. Which is not considered petite. But compared to me her small boned 5 ft. 7 is petite. So it’s perfect and boy no we would’ve slept together the first day that we saw each other so it’s possible that all the other stuff is Joe only happens if I was really trying to be respectful to the Kennedys and maybe that is impossible, considering how much I love, Lacey.
I think a man like Al Franken could think Lacey is perfect because she is sort of petite in her bones but she’s not petite to him. She’s too tall for that she’s more petite to me.
So then he sees you know little Miss hot for him, and they have an immediate attraction and family love, and he did he doesn’t even know why, bless his heart. He he doesn’t even know why it’s just this woman smaller than you. You’re 56 and she’s smaller so that’s a very small petite woman who is still average at least in her curves. She’s beautiful and really desperately sad. Truth is if Lacey was 54 he made a thought. She was just too far out of his league to take her virginity in high school. Because to him she’s a giant and therefore he can take her lease is not a giant she’s a petite 5 ft. 7 if you’re short, if you’re abnormally short, which is what he actually is for a man she seems big she’s really not that big.” says Lem.
“does Lacey ever expect an apology from Casi or the other assholes who ruined Chanel No. 22 for the entirety of history, other than what Lacey is written on her blog. No because she’s sure the Casi still wears number 22 thinking that it’s Lacey’s signature. The problem is Lacey was smelling it in the way that it was intended. It was supposed to be intended as an airy beautiful, sad fragrance. Dry melancholy, and yet incredibly taken by love. It was intended for the wedding collection from Chanel the white collection if you need me to say. And the idea is that it’s innocent beautiful of course evocative of sex, but not sexy. It can be sexy it can be sexy but it’s not necessarily this bodacious 2 Bros but a big breasted bitch from Australia, or a saucy maven who has curly blonde hair in Virginia or Casi with her gigantic boobs, and very little sons should be wearing. It’s heartbreaking to think that Lacey discovered that perfume loved it wrote about it and then people claim oh no it’s mine. It’s my wife’s but I work before I realized potassium should smell like because I’m an expert. Lacey was not gonna ever call herself a perfume expert because that’s an oxymoron. I think we how do you even call yourself that what does that mean? Do you have to go to Perfume school? How many books do you have to read? That’s a very sketchy title that’s very stupid unless if you were extraordinarily well recognized in some profound way, and not just by brand refs by associations that could give you an award or publicly recognize you. The thing is Lacey smells that after being tortured for seven years by the illuminati, Casi didn’t recognize the perfume community as the truth there of Chanel 22 after all… and she thinks this smells like cheap fucking shit. Because Al Franken never cried for her, and she has wanted to be dead since she was three fucking years old. Growing up an abject poverty isn’t the only fucking bad thing that can happen to you you moron. And Lacey husband, ours endlessly try not to cry herself to death literally. Lacey has gone through so much emotional trauma has been so strong and so brave and so courageous that if she walked over all of her pain, she would kill her self literally. If she had someone who could revive her and put her in the hospital, maybe she could cry, but she barely cries at all anymore… Rather people because she’s not able to cry for medical reasons that’s how shitty her life has been, you brilliant lover you… what does she wear now Flores violets what is the most genius perfume collectors in the world was so beaten to death for just loving perfume, and being old buddy in America in 2016 and big, white and cis and straight an extraordinarily beautiful and talented… an extraordinary, sexy, extremely kind and loving and Christian and brilliant… and curvy and fertile… that she now sees Chanel 22 as a Cruel disgusting joke, which means that she no longer feels happiness. Love the way that she used to consciously and probably never will until death, which is 30 or 40 years from now. And yet there’s Casi shaking her ass, shaking her ass and ‘I killed her I killed her!’ like it’s you know survival of the fittest thing. But the problem is why are we so sure that that’s what it seems to be survival of the fittest was a thing before global warming. Is it possible that the Earth is actually trying to let Casi win to kill off the human species? Yes it’s completely possible that earth really just wants humanity dead. Because you know all the trees are dying the lakes are dying. The air is boiling. The water is boiling. I don’t know. I kind of think that maybe the earth is getting cut us sick of us.
The truth is Lacey can cut a bitch but she wouldn’t out of respect for God and humanity that’s like saying that’s walking up to Al Capone and saying, ‘Hey bitch, can you cut me open and you cannot I’m being completely serious!’ in a totally self-righteous way like ‘oh my gosh, oh my gosh!’ Casi is a total fraud. She likes to impersonate people who are bourgeois and that’s disgusting that she thinks that she’s like Lacey at all. But no, no, no said the perfume ask thoughts let the Popeyes in bed with big boobs who doesn’t understand the film that says window because we know everything about everything will be fucking hot sexy Chanel 22. It’s too nervous and tuber rose mean sucks always every time sucks sucks sucks when it’s tuberoses. Sucks time.” says Mlle. Coco Chanel.
“ who is Helen smell like hairspray?” says a perfume hater.
“ oh yo bro sharpshooter he was chip in the hip don’t you damn damn you got me you got me just like how I was Asian with my tiny haircut and then that means that I’m impossible and that you are really old money or how I didn’t know that cheap leather gets sticky. Because I’ve never bought cheap leather. My ex-husband bought cheap as fuck leather at estate sale just for fun and I didn’t realize what cheap leather was like because I’m not like you. Honey, you have no idea what my hair will smell like you have no idea what my hair would’ve look like and I highly doubt that I myself would’ve able to handle smelling like hairspray. I have olfactory system better than yours.” says Lacey.
“ so you were still hopeful when you start collecting for him that you’ll find love or are you giving up and trust that you’ll find it in the afterlife?” asks a gay man.
“ i’m totally giving up was planning on being alive from my kids until I died, but I was at peace with it. I had no hope of ever finding love almost all, but I had some I know I didn’t know I had some I had a small amount, and then it was taken from me when I realized that there really were probably almost no people alive who could love me, and then I had maybe a shred left and then that was taken from me with Mr. blue when I realize that I was just being made fun of and totally misunderstood… and then, when I a realize last summer that there was absolutely no fucking chance almost at all, if any, I keep on completely, and it’s been a brutal, sadistic journey the entire way. All of your happy dancy fucking shit about how great life is just proves how much of a dumbass you are or how sheltered your life is or has been.”
“ if any cause this whole thing, she has an argument for why people report should die as children choose an argument against food, stamps not for it, and certainly not for her husband’s political career.” says the whole Illuminati.
“ but would she been able to bring her children into the world? That’s my only concern otherwise, I might agree I would I weigh about her kids in the butterfly effect otherwise I could actually be true.” says Lacey.
“I think I know why you’ve never been loved. I meant you’re too tentative if you were to just put yourself out there and make an ass of yourself men would love you.” says Al Franken.
Lacey thinks. “ I don’t know that I’m trying to imagine myself actually genuinely making an ass of myself and it’s hard to imagine first of all. And then I don’t know how I would actually even do that the truth is, if I did that I would end up acting like Marilyn Monroe or I’d start speaking in a Scottish accent, or both. Because, when I start making ass of myself, I become extraordinarily sexual, and my voice starts being Scottish. Because that’s that’s pretty much all I’m hiding is this intense sexuality and possibly a Scottish accent.” says Lacey.
Sinead laughs.
“ sweetie all she’s hiding is a Scottish accent, a sexy talk a sexy walk and that’s it.” says a gay man.
“ and honestly in my generation, walking and talking and acting like Marilyn Monroe with a Scottish accent is a little weird. I don’t think it would make men love me more or anyone.“ says Lacey.
“ he was trying to say that you should be evil and interesting.” says Al Franken.
“ OK but what if I don’t want to be evil then you’re just ripping and raping my spirit and that’s disgusting. And that’s not love, you dumb ass.” says Lacey.
“ maybe you can’t be a lot Phoebe your reincarnate and you were there for your British aristocrat and so I’m in the right to hate you!” says Al z Franken.
“ oh no, I don’t think that’s quite how it works. It doesn’t even make any sense but nice try. Is there a reason you have to send my soul to hell to love your current wife that doesn’t really make sense.” says Lem.
More later.
“ you’re not attacking my wife because you’re jealous of all are you you’re attacking my wife because she’s been a total fucking bitch to you and I’ve used her to attack you too and then seemingly we may have stolen parts of your life for our own financial benefit and power which was a very dangerous thing to do unless if we came from an astronomically, wealthy family, a welfare than any family tougher exist and we don’t.” says Al Franken.
“ yeah that’s true. You know what really hurts me though is that I feel like you should know better. It just seems like you should know that you’ve lied and that your wife really is just kind of a horny slut who was hot when she was young and that maybe you love her, but that’s it and it’s too good to be true I want to be nice if you realize that you don’t really know me back in 2016 or that you do know me I don’t I don’t even know what happened I don’t know what happened. I don’t know if you still for me and you’re being hurt because the real people who did it no one has the guts to annihilate or if your wife and you actually had something to do with it the problem is if you and your wife didn’t you should be protecting them he should probably just be dead if that’s what they deserve” says Lem.
“ the problem is it doesn’t work I know Franny feel sorry for Becca, prthe and Aaron and Mr. blue. But just because she go out tour and it was miserable for her and then she did really well and just because you admire that doesn’t mean you are those people everyone’s unique there are patterns, but sometimes the patterns break that’s why they’re patterns.” says Lacey.
“ I just I still feel even if that’s Coco Chanel and that’s so sweet that she wants to talk to me. Oh my God I know I’m a big deal OK I just feel like Coco give me the size of my boobs and the color of my eyes I guess I know you’re Jewish I know you suck with the word Heimers to live through World War II, and that you’re probably fucked like tons of Jewish officers in France to survive the war. That you probably aren’t you and I’m not OK I’m a white person, so just take all your due battery with the Wertheimer’s and your closeted sexual relationship that I’m sure you had with them the entire time you were alive I suppose there are some French people who are dark but they don’t look like you it’s like light dark hair and like blue eyes because everyone in Europe pretty much had blue eyes before the eight 1980s I’ve studied it. And see this is the kind of stuff that I know that I can just pull out of my head to you when Lacey says stuff I am it’s no different than this because when she says stuff like oh the British are Csokasy believed in monogamy I know for a fact that I’ve read somewhere as seen on a movie that that’s not true. So you’re not French you’re Jewish I can guarantee it.
Anyway, I just want to say I just wanna say that there are no Jews that I have ever seen with blue eyes and the hair color that I have naturally I dye it probably do attract Jews. And I should wear Chanel 22 because I fully understand it in a way that I don’t think you do because what I understand is that your brows actually is a sexual fragrance Luka turn hookah school you to hell with his genius is probably the most brilliant British man to ever live. When he talks about Bentley is when he talks about living in Europe, especially London, I realize OK that’s a British Lord in a good way. I mean think about the name, Luca Turin. His parents must been very sophisticated British people you know Luka it’s so sexy it’s like exotic British lord I love it because those are the men who understand that boobs are for fun if you know what I mean. Oh my God. So as I’m just thinking about how important it is that we have this discussion, I just want you to know I resemble him better than you because I am I am I am me, and therefore I know perfume better than you because I wear perfume you created it you probably barely ever had anything to do with most of your creations I know how things work you had your peasants writing everything.
So I’m gonna go with the fact that you don’t really understand Perfume you just understand how to sleep with juice like Lacey because I’m sure she slept with Al Franken in real life and I hate that she’s betrayed our people.” says Casi seriously.
“ actually, I was 100% French and I slept with Nazis not Jews and not because I was in the holocaust dear.” says Mlle. Coco Chanel.
“ see I didn’t know that Lacey must be obsessed with perfume and I’m not obsessed with it. I’m a perfume lover not hater.” says Casi.
“ I don’t have any resources in here. I haven’t written about it for a very long time but I haven’t worn any that for a while either so it’s not really.” says Lacey.
“ so you’re not really obsessed with perfume it really was just of a fascination for you in a good way it was just you were a collector and another officiant aficionado.” says another perfume hater.
“ wait so where was me or them we have twisted reality for the sake of egos of the poor.” says Al Franken. “ not to actually help them and less if you count the fact that we’re destroying the liberal main stream media.”
“ and honestly it’s not a good thing or a bad thing I don’t know!” says Wobbly.
“ yeah wasn’t really an awesome idea to let Marin Townsend beat the shit out of America in the whole world. She’s not necessarily homophobic at all. I don’t even think she’s homophobic at all but she’s still very Catholic who went to the Sorbonne and I mean well, it works and yet, it’s been weird.” says a Tik Tok star.
“ do you know if you should try to blow up Muirin.” says Sinead.
“ mirin S is your real name in an alternate universe 11 finds you and loves you and you have a weird relationship that’s not at all incestuous and that’s hilarious so then you fall in love with a 90 year old man for unit for his dad and he tells you that he never loved anyone but you and that he’s straight or he dies before you are old enough to roast him and that doesn’t even mean anything and then he dies and realizes that you’re his soulmate and that he stocked you waiting for you and then when you got there, he didn’t even realize it because he was too old which is tragic so then hopefully I can explain to him why that happened yeah you know what the fucking truth is I have a feeling that Lacey and Lem’s are two of the good ones that I speak is a really rich British aristocrats and they’re willing to go through that just to try to like love people and the sad truth is I have a feeling we really have gone to far.” says a perfume hater.
“ yes, that being said there might not be reincarnation and honestly there’s no 22 really wasn’t necessarily my signature. It really is just forest violence. My life is just too depressing. I mean I pray to die when I was 28 I got into a fight with my husband I ran around the corner and a half I slipped and I smashed my finger into a wall, and I bled so much that whole mattress was ruined, and I prayed to die, but it was just a finger there’s a scar and I’m not dead entirely.” says Lacey. “ i’m not actually better so much is just am confused. And hurt and devastated.” She thinks. “ and more than just angry for good reason I suspect.”
“ oh, hell, why did you decide that Lacey was lying piece of shit? I have a feeling you’re worse than your wife she’s bad, but I was feeling you’re actually worse. And I’m sure we will have supported you but maybe not completely because to be honest even if they’re the ones that started it and they are responsible for that I may have had some hesitations, so why why is Lacey a piece of shit?” asks a Millennial.
More later.
“Lacey always felt awkward in the United States of America. So did Lem.” says Mlle. Coco Chanel. “And they can’t figure out what in the world they’re supposed to do for the next 30 to 40 years.
“The problem is America is really nothing more than the Hotshot Gang. It used to be more than that but now it’s really nothing more and retrospectively it’s becoming nothing more than The Hotshot Gang.” says Lacey. “A lot of the world is very quietly, considering shunning America a bit like how the Amish do.”
“So you never lacked anything in the sense that your parents-“ starts Al Franken.
“Well that was not a full sentence. Is there something you’d like to say or are you done?” says Lacey.
“Can I ask something: why are we supposed to be mad at her in the US? What did she do to us in the Illuminati?! Why are we all collectively supposed to be angry?” asks an actress.
“Have you have you noticed that you’re really not replacing your dying celebrities with anyone in the West? Isn’t it kind of creepy?” asks Lem.
“Are you ever gonna come onto me or come back to me or be interested in me or is it all gonna just be on me if I want to be with you at all?” asks Al Franken of Lacey.
“No I am not going to ever come onto you or come after you in any way, shape or form unless of God makes me…but otherwise actually, sorry if that’s not a good thing for you.” says Lacey.
“So then we’re just completely through for eternity. It doesn’t matter what I’m feeling at all.” says Al.
“Yes, absolutely unless if God says otherwise.” says Lacey.
“So you don’t have any feelings for me or do?” asks Al.
“I do. But…it’s sort of…packaged away. And it’s very likely those feelings will die within a month or so.” says Lacey. “I’m sorry. Or not. Depending on what’s best.”
“They’ll be dead…forever…if I’m Lem and I love her as much as I say I do.” says Lem. “It’s not that she didn’t or doesn’t have any feelings…it’s that they don’t have a home.”
“Why are you always so eloquent?” he asks heartlessly.
“ you know that’s just sort of who I am I am I’m sorry what what are you like? You’re not eloquent you’re just mumble or what?” asks Lacey.
“ I know I don’t find you attractive?” he says.
“ oh, I kind of think that that’s a really immature thing to say and honestly what the fuck is your problem?” says Lem.
“ call just I want you to worship me and think I’m better than you and everyone that’s the bottom line that’s what I want that’s a Mr. blue wants as we all want.” says Al Franken.
“him that’s not some thing that a English person would ever say or do they they may actually want that to some degree put in a very different far more psychologically healthy way. I no longer acknowledge you as a senator or this country as even a nation in my mind what you just said, was so utterly stupid and idiotic and subhuman, that I no longer see this country as existing I don’t know why you thought keeping us awake for the last five days to eventually ask her what are you gonna do? Why are you doing it and then when she answers you saying fuck you Made any sense if this is your wife’s doing you really are horribly mistaken in some way. You don’t do what you just did the way you did it actually I’m not even gonna bother.
The rest of this blog post will be about being daring.” says Lem. “If there’s no Illuminati, what difference does it make?”
More later.
“America is a colony.” says Lem. “Of Great Britain at it’s finest. Forever.”
A second later.
“It’ll remain the same but America will slowly become entirely dependent on worshiping Christ…and honoring the Great Britain of the past.” says Lem.
Later.
“The Illuminati decides to yell at Lacey for her lack of desire to use olive oil on her spaghetti noodles. They bet the entire United States on her negligent use of olive oil. They bet that they can convince her…that she’s a Christian heretic for not doing so.” says F. Scott Fitzgerald.
“What was there argument?” asks Zelda.
“She needs to add olive oil for health purposes and by lacking to do so she has an evil level disrespect for her own body.” says Scott.
“Did they explain why the olive oil was so important to them?” asks Zelda.
“They wholeheartedly believed Lacey already knew and was lying to them.” says Scott.
“That’s…insane.” says Zelda.
“Everything’s falling apart since the Queen died.” says Scott.
“I’ll need to edit this tomorrow.” says Lem.
“Goodnight!” says Scott in Saint Paul with Zelda.
“Goodnight!” says Lem with Lacey on holiday.
Keen to Cross the Pond 