Nothin’ by N.O.R.E. plays.
“Judy Garland and Lacey Banks should have switched. Judy would be better off now and Lacey would have been better off then. They’re alike. And…I’m worried we did that.” says Benjamin Franklin.
“I couldn’t marry her.” says Mark. “And you needed me here.”
“There has to be other Jews you could Jade married.” says Liza to Mark.
“No. Not really.” says Mark.
“So you conjured Mark. With his eliteness and genius. To succeed. And yet…it messes up everything?” asks Liza.
“Possibly.” says Benjamin Franklin.
“Huh. So…you couldn’t conjure his soulmate?” asks Liza.
“No. We don’t cover love.” says Ben. “We weren’t…that sophisticated.”
Area Codes by Ludacris plays about the women the American Illuminati conjured.
“Huh. So you conjure the women? Or you conjured the men?” asks an African of Benjamin Franklin.
“We conjured people. We still do. But…clearly we can’t handle that responsibility.” says Benjamin Franklin.
“The ILLUMINATI CONJURES REINCARNATION?!?” yells Jonah.
“Y’all find that surprising? Nah. Chill. We on it. Like…hundreds of years ago.” laughs a black man. “This an old concept, Jonah.”
“What is it?” asks Rhianna.
“We do what y’all did. Professionally.” says Benjamin Franklin.
“But we left it to the family.” says Africa. “Or tribal leaders. You all made it…corporate?”
Biggie laughs. “Huh. So…God isn’t God anymore? No. He is. But…it’s just sad. Ain’t it?”
Hypnotize plays.
“No. Lacey and I aren’t ugly. She certainly isn’t. But…our…souls aren’t compatible with the times we were born into.” says Judy Garland.
“I feel compatible!” says Liza.
“You’d like being a kid now too though. Trust me.” says Judy. “You’d not have a drugged up mommy. I’d be a professional. Very well off. Sweetie I was brilliant. And…I’m innocent and wise enough to understand that men now…would appreciate me. Me for me.”
“Where would we live?” asks Liza.
“West Coast! You might have a Tik Tok account that was super successful. Don’t worry.” says Judy.
“And I’m the same?” asks Liza.
“Possible. We’re going to talk to God together about this Lord willing.” says Judy.
“Yeah. I hope so too.” says Liza.
“What if it’s true?” says Matthew Perry. “Does reincarnation seem safe? Even to talk about? No. What happened there?”
Silence.
“No. It’s not. But I don’t trust most living theologians to understand much less handle it.” says Matthew Perry. “Why did they make films about romantic ghosts? …And yet nowadays Jehovah’s Witnesses sound like Charismatic Non-Denominational theologians on Instagram?! It’s gross.”
“But…my mom…would have improved it?” asks Judy.
“Yes. Her and lots of people. Who aren’t here. They’re waiting or they came too early.” says Matthew Perry.
“So Africa…has this all figured out?” asks a black woman.
“So I wrote a book…to get out of taking my shots? Because I think they make me dumb?” says Bobby Kennedy Junior. “Why am I so suspicious of Bill Gates though? I still wonder.”
“You should have been born in the 1700’s.” says Benjamin Franklin to Bobby Kennedy Junior.
“Where?” asks Cheryl.
Benjamin Franklin looks worried. “Ahh…here. Mostly. Canada? Further north.”
“With the French?” asks Bobby.
“Yes!!” says Benjamin Franklin. “Dark, volatile women! The great outdoors! The age of wonder!”
“My parents would miss me.” says Bobby.
“Yes. Well…lots of mistakes were made.” says Benjamin Franklin. “I can’t sort them all out instantly. Hopefully you can comprehend that.”
“How did this conversation happen?” asks Michael Rockefeller.
“They interrupted Lacey and me having sex. As per usual.” says Lem.
“Was I an interruption?” asks Jonah Wiley.
“Yes. So was Dr. Moritz.” says Lem. “Jack and the Illuminati have been obsessed with interrupting us since we first made love.”
“Yes! It’s funny how they never seem to process that.” says Thomas Jefferson. “Why…do you all keep interrupting them having sex? If they’re not in a heterosexual relationship? You’re all far more illogical and intellectually bankrupt than you fathom.”
A black man cries. Africa did know. And he wishes his people hadn’t been dragged into this. But they were.
That being said…he trusts God…that something truly good can work out.
“Why are you all so scared of Lacey and Lem having sex?” asks Liza.
“Because!” says Diego.
“Lacey and Judy had fathers. Possibly. And…Judy’s father would have made a great Boomer. Lacey belongs to Tom and the past. But Judy and her dad are more contemporary than they were given due. Does that make sense?” explains Matthew Perry.
“I’m not coming back. With my mom. Okay?” says Liza.
“That’s fine!!” says Benjamin Franklin.
“Can you be protected?” asks Liza.
“If there’s reincarnation in the Bible…of course!” says God. “It’s very complicated.”
“Yes! Just wait. We’re going to ask God lots of stuff!” says Judy to Liza. “If that’s best.”
“Yeah! Like what’s up with Minnesota.” says Liza. “It’s…like a Russian winter.”
Nutcracker, Ballet, Op. 71 by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky plays.
