“ if we read the most hateful evil, things into stuff that she post that we could think of because we were jealous and we’re too stupid to realize that that’s what we were doing. That being said, let’s really have it out because even if some of us are having that realization right now that Lacey probably was a heck of a lot more sweet and innocent and good hearted then people really want to believe him and sophisticated. Let’s let’s just let’s just have a discussion.” says the perfume community.
“ we can have it for half an hour at most.” says Lem.
“ I said, why didn’t you like Marc Jacobs daisy?” asks Alabama.
“ it’s not her style.” says Lem.
“ wrong answer!” says Alabama.
“ nope that’s the right answer. It’s not her style.” says Lem.
“ hey fine. Then what’s her ideal handbag?” asks Alabama.
“ there hasn’t been one ever made. Sincerely, there’s never been one made she likes loaner him, but it’s not ideal and the queen and she would do that. It’s probably the best one that’s ever been made but it’s still not quite perfect now because it’s not perfect but it’s just not perfect for Lacey.” says Lem.
“ and what’s not perfect about it?” asks Hermes.
“ yes the proportions are perfect. The weight is perfect it’s close to perfect and the truth is Lacey would prefer something an alligator that probably would be very hard to make today. It probably would’ve been possible the 1950s that essentially like a Traviata in alligator.“ says Lem Billings.
“Like a brown alligator?” asks the UK.
“ yes with gold hardware whatever is best gold plated gold put up, preferably 24 karat and then either plated or solid. No that would be her handbag and she would take very good care of it but it’s the Traviada an alligator and with gold hardware I know it’s such a ride up to the Queen that’s just Lacey’s taste and actually I think it’s almost out of difference for the queen and respect for her.” says Lem.
“ well, then that’s wearing pink on Wednesdays or something what does Lacey actually like herself?” asks Queen Elizabeth II.
“ I don’t think she would really carry a handbag and she’s so avant-garde that most of her styles would be bizarre. If she wants to wear what she really wants to wear she’s extraordinary eccentric and her actual taste but she doesn’t want to be offensive.” says Lem.
“ I know what she means she wear a dress made of crystals that would be worth maybe $4 million with silk underneath I was her day where I didn’t sis thought it was just just clothes and be completely serious.” says Queen Elizabeth II.
“ no that’s completely true.” says Lem.
“ I am people are really struggling with the fact that I wasn’t gay or attracted to men at all um so let’s discuss this more review committee please please try to explain what is it that made you think Lacey was faking it?” says Lem.
“ has she ever thought about a metal handbag?” asks Balenciaga.
“ yes that actually is one hand bag that she would love to have if she married Michael Lacey might’ve been so wild as to have made a literal solid platinum head back or solid silver sterling silver that would be that difficult but she’s never I mean that’s not available so.” says Lem. “ but no, you have to be a billionaire probably to convince one of those companies to make something like that believe it or not they’re very persnickety potentially loner might make one for her if they thought it was safe out of I don’t even steal or something and actually if they did that and sold it, she would buy it. She would insist on it, um making one out of platinum probably would be out of her price range even with the oil but um or gold that’s very expensive but if they made one of steel that she might actually buy it, I know that they never do that but I don’t think they’d be quite as persnickety.” says Lem.
Silence and chatter.
“ when people unlike, Lacey would probably start suing these people which is why a loaner probably wouldn’t do it.” says Lem.
“ oh, why didn’t she buy more stuff?” asks a reader.
“ well, there’s many reasons for that one of us. She’s not a glutton.” says Lem. “ also, she’s not comfortable spending $3 million on perfume.”
“That’s a lot!” says a reader. “How much would she have to spend to- How much would she need to be worth to be comfortable?”
“$3 billion net.” says Lem.
“That makes sense.” says Casi, nodding.
“Why!?” yells Europe.
“Because it’s so fragile.” says Lem.
“She’s thinking of it in terms of an investment?” asks the perfume community.
“Yes! Always. Until she’s dead.” says Lem.
“So that’s why she’s not embarrassed by half empty perfume bottles?” asks the perfume community.
“You can’t be that dumb!” says Lem.
“Are full bottles rarer than they realize?” asks Australia.
“Absolutely!” yells Lem. “You fucking jackasses!”
“Why is that so stupid?” asks Stephanie.
“You know she’s shared this before. It’s amazing how you guys have a very selective memory. There is a scammer who is very popular on eBay who purchase a real metal Faberge aphrodisia that was 3/4 full when she bought it from an antique store. Great condition she bought it for probably I don’t know $30 maybe and they turned around and sold it for maybe 250 but they labeled it brand new, and how did they convince people of that they had a box for it or maybe they didn’t have a box for it but what they did have was her bottle which was her bottle by the way I am almost positive and they filled it to the top probably with perfumers alcohol or some probably genuinely quality perfumers alcohol And I think they rationalize it by thinking that it’s condensed anyway overtime and that they’re just reconstituting it but it was a very rare bottle so it maybe was even more than 200 but maybe it was 500 I don’t know but it was just a sold it she sold it for gully maybe 40 or $50 and then they sold it for possibly 500 because they were constituted it But that’s that’s not a safe assumption to know whether not the top notes are completely reconstituted or that the alcohol is really blending with all of the notes perfectly it’s still lie and it’s not as evil summers might be potentially some people lie in the perfume comedian, sell bottles that are complete false vacations, but that irritated Lacey And she let it go, but it irritated her arm and the fact that you people would fall for the lie that those people are telling and then insist on being true violently is on speakable to me. Reminds me of Jack Jack used to do shit like that all the time and it pissed me off even I was trying to be his husband, I used to lose my temper with him not that I was ever in love with him, but it’s such peasant such peasant, bullshit it’s evil peasantry why can’t you people understand when you’re being told no?!?” asks Lem.
“ no longer allowed.” says someone.
“ I was a bitch to her. I gave my wife on open bottle of Chanel 22 and I was trying to sell her the open one. I think I was trying to do the same thing the ilumiNATTI does to her. Let me try to explain why I think they think they’re more powerful than her.” says Dmitry.
“ hi I just want to know is there anyone who would like to speak was Eddie actual evidence to suggest that Lacey was poor that we could discuss and dismantle or are you being too stubborn with your evil or was there really never a reason to think she was poor and people are just idiots?” asks Lem.
Elsie Hill cries.
“ washer.” says a demon. “We’re going to drown her?”
“ but then she’ll put you in a terrible place.” says God.
“Crap!” says the demon.
“ no there really wasn’t a reason we thought she was poor. I think we mostly just lie to ourselves and probably still do some peoples cases, and also probably lie about how superior she is in other ways to including her beauty and character and intelligence.” says a perfume community member.
“ do you know what it is? What is that we make a really big deal out of any unique thing we’ve ever found we photograph it under perfect lighting with cameras, and make it extraordinary and to be honest she has bottles that probably very few people in the whole world, have my Molinard, or whoever got that are just as elites, if not poorly than anything, most of us have ever seen in person, but she never photographs it. She never photographs that she never takes pictures of it that way even when she had an expensive camera she never photographed it in that way and I I’ve I’ve never I’ve never been able to handle that.” says a perfume collector.
“ speaking of which I think I imagined that it would be harder for her to get a full bottle of Chanel that I probably is love. How hard is it?” asks Dmitry.
“ not hard at all. There’s plentiful bottles of Chanel 22. The bottle she had that was half empty given to her Christmas by her ex-husband was given to her because he didn’t give a fuck about her feelings and that way or he was autistic or both they’re not really together anymore, it had nothing to do with him how much money he had him he Greek he reconstituted speaking of reconstitutes he reconstituted a real Cartier tank he bought the Cartier wristwatch no he did he bought the actual tank had Cartier put the glass or was it Krystal back onto it, then they serviced it at put the band from Cartier on the tech. It’s a restored Cartier tank that shields probably from the 50s I would say it’s potentially one of a kind and someways but they did it and he probably paid $1400 for the whole thing which was a steal but that’s so true that Matt has business wise, so no I mean he bought a very rare Cartier tank essentially for around $1400 do you understand what I’m saying he paid $1400 at the same time where he chose to buy 100 or $200 bottle of Chanel 22 he could’ve easily purchased an unopened bottle of vintage Chanel 22 for white three or $400 at the most he purchased Chanel 45/2 open or half used for about three or $400 and if you wanna argue about that one you’re gonna lose your your argument with me that was her idea nobody else in the community had even thought about the boss channels until she started talking about it and then you copied her like the pathetic person. You really are Dimitry. You’re probably not pathetic all the time but that was pathetic to copy her and get her. Absolutely no credit you little sniveling toad.
That was her idea and you stole it.
And she doesn’t need your friend in France to get an open bottle of Chanel 22 or any bottle Chanel 22 that was absurd and she didn’t want to help you do whatever the hell it was you were trying to do should have the money because her husband had just purchased a new piano essentially, and they just moved And she didn’t trust you. You were the one who approached her. You weren’t even following her at the time.
I use harsh language, but I only mean to apply it to your character where it’s necessary and appropriate.
And I know she could’ve purchased a three or $400 bottle of of unopened Chanel 22 actually one of the bottles she has is old more than she might think and you said that I don’t know if you knew that or if you guessed that or if you were egg trying to make me happy mean but no it really is a very old bottle of Chanel 22. It doesn’t smell the same.
It’s been very awkward being in St Paul because we will hear have realized that it is sending from the mayflower is in there, Mets and maybe then they’d have to realize that there was Dutch of money here the whole time and I don’t know how they never processed that reality when it came to Louis or Lacey or possibly other people as well. But that’s a side note.
I get the sense Dmitry that you’re excepting that you’re full of it.” says Lem.
“ hey so the only real power they have over her is through narcissism and autism?” says Betty White.
“ that cannot be all that it is!” says Mary Richardson.
“ no that’s pretty much all that is Mary. I’m sorry you’re not my daughter-in-law you dumb bitch.” says Lem. “ and I didn’t say that to come onto you. I said that just in case, if you’ve betrayed Lacey‘s trust as a human.“
“How would Mary have done that?” asks Bobby.
“ probably by sleeping with you right ha ha that’s funny not necessarily I don’t know Mary how did you start to siding that Lacey was beneath you?” says Lem.
“ him, because I was starting to feel threatened because Bobby was feeling threatened, and Carolyn was feeling threatened, and we were all feeling threatened, and we realized him that we’re probably not as special as we thought we were and that’s not something she was supposed to have to tell us, but we’re two evils except that.” says Mary Richardson.
“ yeah yeah you are you’re nothing more than a bunch of dumb ass Irish people who thought you were a real fucking special cause the US did for about 50 years after they shot most of you you alcoholic drug addicted bitches you think you’re so fucking special. Do you write a book that you write yourself jack asses!” says Elsie Hill.
“ hi I didn’t write the book you’re right, Elsie I did write my books a ghost writer did I am not have Scott Fitzgerald but I’m a hell of a lot wealthier than he is aren’t I?” asks Chris Hayes.
“ not necessary bozo he really was actually very smart and incredibly rich he was really fucking rich. He wasn’t as rich as my husband, but he was extremely rich.” says Elsie Hill.
“ it sounds like your husband owns you Elsie.” says Chris.
“ I hit you know that’s that that is none of your business.” says Elsie.
“ you hit me, Elsie?” says Chris.
“ oh, you’re funny you know very well what it happened. Don’t play dumb with me.” says Elsie.
“ what you’re insinuating is very in sin incendiary.” says Chris Hayes.
“ well, that’s funny.” says Elsie.
“ no, it’s not!” says Chris.
“ oh, not now!” says Elsie.
“ people are going to think we’re having an affair, but I’m having an affair with a ghost.” says Chris.
“ oh, we could do a far but worse my dear. I was actually considered quite beautiful by many people Lacey doesn’t think so, but you think your wife is pretty you made for kids with her I’m just as beautiful as her, if not more so.” says Elsie.
“ your kids could read this blog and think that they’ve lost you to me.” says Chris Hayes.
“ well, how do they know that you and I are soulmates?” says Elsie.
“ you are the street trash, dog faced call, digging, sweetheart, that I was in love with.” says Chris.
“ why do you think I’m a sweetheart those are some very awful things to be.” says Elsie.
“ oh I see what you did you used her and then she was devastated because she knew that I was possibly trying to reach out to her in some deep way but wasn’t who she is at all I found your son and that actually hurt because she is very deep and that is quite important even if it’s not personal for me so to speak why did you do that to her that’s so cruel?” says Chris Hayes.
“ because she’s prettier than me and she comes from a fairly aristocratical background and she’s got an alien in our family is dirt compared to her family even in Norway maybe especially in Norway and I had the sense that my husband could fall in love with her and I think I thought she’s going to have forever to be happy and I’m not high group so much for not that for the slightly and we were working class very working class we lived in a duplex my father was a blue-collar worker. Hi I have a well and I just chose to be a secretary and it is Cinderella with an iron well so to speak, if Lacey had been born to her proper family, we would’ve been staring at her by the time she was 15 even if I married him and I think that just bothered me so when she started sleeping with Scott, I just lost my temper. Fuck that’s evil because I fucked up her life and I have fucked up Lem’s and Lacey‘s eternity, and Jack is in hell and a its by gods grace that I am not to him I am no I was just bitter, possibly and that there’s there are things wrong with me I’m not always in my right mind to speak, and I never really deserve to lose love. I never deserved it, but I always thought I deserved better than that. Can you believe that? I wonder if I thought I deserved you.” says Elsie.
“ hey what is it that you like about me?” asks Chris.
“ you’re wild you’re genuinely a very wild person and you’re edgy and you were filled with despair and evil and yet I think you keep thinking that there’s something good in the world and I don’t know I think I was just rather affected by you you remind me of my husband a little bit and how you look I don’t know if you’d find me attractive or not you might I use Lacey and her youth and beauty inappropriately because it didn’t really make any sense just because I am married to Louis doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m born into money and so when I’m using his name to cheat on him to betray his soulmate, like a peasant, a little piece of shit under my shoe it doesn’t works. It doesn’t work it doesn’t work, but that was my thought to use Louis to screw over Lacey because she irritates the hell out of me with her superiority, using the illuminati to make it to to get to be with you and that was as far as I got.” says Elsie.
“ why do we hate Lacey so much?” asks Chris.
“ because she’s annoying us all hell.” says Elsie.
“ oh, that’s not nice Elsie.” says Chris.
“ you won’t know why I thought I deserved you?” says Elsie.
“Have we slept together?” asks Chris.
“ oh, you millennials are so harsh. I needed you to pick me up there. It was very sad.” says Elsie.
Chris laughs.
“ don’t laugh at me!” says Elsie. Then she starts laughing.
“ what are we laughing at Elsie?” asks Chris.
“ me. big shot me.” says Elsie.
“ oh, you’re really not Lacey at all oh my word I think when people think that Jack is Lacey rein-“ says Chris.
“Oh shut-up!” says Elsie.
“ never gonna shut up I think when people think don’t you dare interrupt me I think when people think no don’t interrupt me I think when people think that Lacey is Jack reincarnated it’s because she’s very sweet and they want to make Jack seem sweeter. You’re not that sweet.” says Chris.
“ that’s true.” says Elsie. “ I’m really good at getting late. I’m really good at being loved. I’m really good at things like that and I looked good and pictures. I’m I’m not sweet that’s true and I bet you think I’m very late. I’m your archetypical elite woman from old money who married in, but no one even knows that anymore.” says Elsie.
“ Yeah, you’re not an old farm girl stewardess hot chick who married some wealthy old man you’re married to the wealthiest man to ever exist.” says Chris. “ I can’t imagine what your life must’ve been like.”
“ you’re right, I had an extraordinarily glamorous, life move, extravagantly, wealthy in a way that most people can’t comprehend. I think that’s why I thought it was so far above Lacey, but it was just a joke that she’d even bother to think she could be anything close to me, but then I didn’t realize how powerful her father was or how much oil they have or if I did I just forgot it for some reason I don’t know but we were we were very wealthy we were extremely wealthy no her father was probably worth 50 million and we didn’t have that much property but we had a lot of other stuff call timber, we were really rich you were extraordinary rich and for some reason in my mind probably the older I got the more I did and did not start to think that was mine not just my husband and it was it was mine but mine not away what was given to me through marriage mine in a way where I had always been mine, which was insane, but I did start to think that.
I I’m gonna tell you something you turn me on did we sleep together possibly you just sleep with your wife but if you thought you were channeling someone else at some point it wasn’t just your wife. It was just your wife, but there was some part of it where it might’ve been me.” says Elsie.
“ so I fell in love with you for a short bit and Diego must’ve intuited that.” says Chris.
“ he did probably S he will die some day you know and when you die, you might meet me if you don’t go to hell and to be honest, you might actually find me extraordinarily beautiful.” says Elsie.
“ your husband was short and I’m not.” says Chris.
“ yeah he was and he was also a pushover and I don’t think you probably are.” says Elsie.
“ no I’m not, but could you have lived off of 6 million to be honest. You’re too you’re too expensive or too expensive. I always thought that I always intuitive that that somehow Lacey was too expensive.” says Chris.
“ oh, yeah, I was too expensive. No, I mean I died, married to him and his possible other men wanted to take me away who just didn’t have as much money as their appointed my life. I was very beautiful and I turned some heads, but no they never not like Lacey but I was somewhere beautiful, right and so I can get attention if I dressed well enough and wore the right perfume and acted correctly. And who is he just her head regardless because she’s so beautiful I am not like that, but I know my husband was short. He was that annoy the hell out of me, but but he wasn’t too sure if you know, but he was so much heart by some people standards know you’re 6 foot 2?”
“ i’m 6 foot.” says Chris.
“ oh yeah, a lot of accusations you made against Lacey were very accurate have a hood rat. I grew up somewhat close to Minneapolis. It wasn’t really the hood when I lived there but it was the nicest area either. There was the highway but it wasn’t. It wasn’t the nicest area of Minneapolis, even when I was growing up, it wasn’t bad but it wasn’t. It wasn’t that nice and that was actually sort of painful growing up in that area because I knew they were very beautiful very rich girls, and I wasn’t what is them. I was Scandinavian as well they might’ve been too, but not the F skirt not the F Scott Fitzgerald knew that apparently but but we were Scandinavian and working class and it was a bad area by some people standards and no I mean it became the hood for a while at least maybe buy some people standards it still would be but I guess we have that in common and you knew that.” says Elsie.
“ well, I married well but I also worked I did I worked very hard.” says Chris.
“ oh, I work seven to Chris I was a secretary I was his secretary I did just you know him dance around naked on a pole. I was the secretary and I actually worked quite quite hard quite diligently.” says Elsie.
“ your family lies about that to try to seem like the Nesheims don’t they?” says Chris.
“ yeah did you make people believe that because of who I married because they’re generally good people for the most part but no it’s annoying to a lot of Scandinavian wealthy people not just a Nesheims although maybe they’re one of the more annoyed families for a reason but no, there’s other Nesheim like Scandinavian families and who I suspect find it obnoxious.” says Elsie.
“ or do we just not understand Lacey‘s personality Elsie?” asks Chris.
“ yeah no you don’t. You don’t understand her personality him. Honestly, I get irritated with her alone myself because as much as I hate Lacey, I did Gruppa Minnesota and I don’t think it’s just being Scandinavian. I I don’t understand him I wouldn’t be having this conversation with you we could’ve had it in the afterlife if he had decided to be more honest about his relationship with Brad Ashley and it just pisses me off because maybe it’s good that I’m I’m sharing this with you but it’s annoying. Why do I have to be responsible for Brad Ashley? Why does Lacey Banks have to be responsible for Brett Ashley just because women let me do you know?” asks Elsie.
“ how are you responsible for bread Ashley?” asks Chris.
“ by the way, I am if I had Mary Louis no I could’ve lived off 6 million you’re still wealthy yeah I could’ve lived off of that and had a famous husband who is on and you know the big deal in the news yes I would’ve loved that lifestyle would love you, but no I was extraordinarily rich but Louis was very serious. How do you say it was really protected me but I think you’re serious too,
Oh what what was the question? Oh yes why am I in trouble? Because I don’t know it just seems like somehow men want to make me the same person as Brett Ashley I’m not does that make sense. She’s up to something I mean. I was up to something but I am coming clean, I would love to see that and maybe if I’m not coming clean enough then all right but I would love to see Brett Ashley come clean for once how many times are people who are both dead and live asked her what happened and she’s lied about it very few people have ever asked me about what happened in my life And that’s why I’m insulted on behalf of any sort of decency I have in me.” says Elsie.
“ it’s getting late I need to stop talking to you, but to be honest I have to be honest if I’ve been talking to you this whole time in my brain because this is a telepathic conversation and not realizing it, I may have developed some feelings for you and I’m sorry I’m gonna take it on your word that you’re my type just from a different generation which is interesting. Is that perverted or not? Maybe it’s not maybe it is if it’s not that’s interesting I wonder if you’re the reason I actually like Jeff Scott Fitzgerald for a while. Actually I wonder if you’re the reason I’ve done as well as I have. And I don’t know when you started helping me but I have a feeling that you’ve always been pulling strings or something or praying or doing something I don’t know I’m Catholic to I don’t know I’ll see why did we do this to everyone I feel like it was a little mean so Sunday will have to explain ourselves if there’s been carnation why we did this to people if you and I are soulmates, if we’re not soulmates and that way, I still feel like we might owe people of explanation him beyond that though you’re right you’re not right Ashley you might be a Golddigger but you’re not Brett Ashley I don’t understand her either. I can’t figure her out either. Yeah I don’t know.” says Chris.
“ I yeah I just I never met you if if you’re if you’re reincarnated, I’ve never met you and if you’re not reincarnated then no I’ve not met you yet in person so to speak him I don’t tell your wife right.” says Elsie laughing.
Chris laughs.
“ I hated you I did I hated you!” says Erin Gloria Ryan.
“ yeah and then you directed all of that hatred towards Lacey.” says Elsie.
“ I will that’s an interesting place to end this I am not Elsie reincarnated. I’m not Elsie at all I’m not Jack reincarnated I can speak on their behalf. Apparently it’s very bizarre but I think this is the end of the conversation for tonight less if there’s anyone in the perfume community, who would like to share, anything about why I seemed poor to them.” says Lacey.
“ why didn’t you just buy a bottle of girl lol Laura blue why don’t you buy one now?” asks the perfume community.
“ because a proper bottle of of a seal there a blue would cost about $1200 and the illuminati has been torturing me and we spent about $50,000 last year trying to survive this time last year we were wandering around going from hotel to hotel Airbnb to Airbnb and then we spent $10,000 on refinishing the wood in my kitchen I don’t have $1200 to spend on perfume right now I will in a while but I don’t have $1200 to spend on perfume right now I come from a very oil rich old money aristocratic family but I don’t have $1200 or 1212 or $1200 to spend on some thing as frivolous as a bottle of perfume that I will rarely ever look at it’ll sit in the closet.” says Lacey Banks.
“ how much would you have to have net right now to buy that bottle?” asks the perfume community.
“ about 3 million in most, that would have to be in gold or something like silver.” says Lacey. “Or diamonds that have GIA certifications with them maybe gold and diamonds I don’t know I would I would really be comfortable buying that at all right now the worlds, incredibly shaky and very few things are worth the most fucking shit.” says Lacey.
“ what if we could somehow stop suffocating you and make sure that the oil rights are in your name?” asks Bobby.
Israel laughs.
“ Israel is laughing for a reason. Honestly, I don’t think I’d probably trust most of you to pull a toothpick out of a box. Fuck you!” says Lacey in Christ’s love, she hopes.
“ I agree.” says Toddy Nesheim.
“Dammit, why did we think you were Elsie and Marilyn Monroe and Jack? Oh God we are that time potentially dammit and we push things so far that she’s right asking her about how she would spend. Her money will always scare you because I don’t think it’ll ever feel truly stable enough as the world markets been as they are to probably buy a $1200 bottle of perfume and that way she might buy one but I’ll only be in a very casual offhand stupid as fuck way where I don’t know if she finds one for $400 somewhere in estate sale or for 20 bucks somewhere and a hole in the ground you don’t seem to understand this woman genuinely could be killed tonight by let she’s not making that up. If this blog is real and there’s an illuminati, she isn’t buying stuff with the idea that she might even be alive in six months And unlike some people who would probably go crazy and spend a lot she’s smart and so she knows she could she could also live and she chooses to not be dumb about the whole thing and she’s just give up. I don’t think she has a lot of fun anymore. I think she finds fun and aesthetic things that she surrounded herself with in her house, and honestly I don’t think you’re that rich I don’t care if you took a picture in a Rolls-Royce Royce once I don’t think you own one I don’t think anyone talking to her is ever been that wealthy or do you own oil you’re a billionaire?” says a Rockefeller.
“ yes I do I’m a trillionaire in Russia.” says someone in the perfume community.
“ then what’s your beef with Lacey you rich oligarch you?” asks a Rockefeller.
“ Lacey doesn’t have that much oil does she? That’s just a joke, right?” she says. no they really do that’s just a fact she just doesn’t give a flying fuck did ever occur to you that there’s no illuminati. These are real people who are actually talking to her telepathically. It’s the shining sweetie she has the shining.” says a Rockefeller.
“ no, she’s prettier than me. I am a liar. I am not that rich I’m not really rich at all. Dammit she doesn’t give a fuck. She really doesn’t give a fuck at all.” says a Russian.
“ OK I’m going to talk that up to her never being loved by me being dumb enough to think that I actually made her feel loved. I didn’t really love her. I was sort of like a friend but I really Merles just had a crush on her I was trying to be her friend, um no I just it just didn’t work. I’m not lame. I’m not. I’m not lame. I’m not really Joe either though but I don’t know. I don’t know that I did actually love her as a person. Crap I might’ve met well but now I don’t know that we were really friends. I think she thought we were potentially and I might’ve been using her slightly not nothing happened but I think I might’ve been using her slightly. You know it’s like there’s an emotional component to things and I don’t think she noticed as much as I enjoyed hanging out with her which is so funny it makes me think people really can be platonic friends um, if she didn’t notice, and if I could have done the same thing without finding her attractive which is possible actually is nothing ever happened. I just became very possessive of our friendship and I am I don’t I don’t think she’s wrong if if I was at her wedding even the way that it is now taking I think it would’ve looked weird even if I was just an usher I don’t think I could’ve been at her wedding or Becca’s yeah no I don’t think I could’ve had to go to Penn strange, which is weird because nothing ever happened and we were really just friends but it was not totally platonic and I don’t think she realize that and it was probably for her it was, which is why she was just like why is he being so possessive and then that was the end of our friendship because I was getting super possessive of our time together and I think she thought this is getting weird. I need to end this friendship and that was the end of our friendship but know if I have if she had been somewhat attracted to me or if it just had gone on at all, even as it is, though I know I don’t think I could’ve been that happy at her wedding, I just couldn’t of been happy at all. I might’ve tried to smile but you would’ve been able to tell it was fake. Oh I’m does not look fake. He looks happy. Thoroughly happy and makes me laugh. It also makes me wonder what the hell he was thinking thinking he was gay, but then maybe that’s released and I don’t have to work because I would never do that. I wondered sometimes if I was gay because I’m very sensitive myself but no I would never I would never make that mistake. How the hell did you make that mistake Lem?” asks Steven Barger.
“ you know it’s funny you are tall and big kind of like me slightly but I don’t think she thought you were attractive if you pursued herself more openly I don’t know what she would’ve thought of but I don’t think that she probably would’ve dated you because it would’ve seemed like it was not quite right and it would happen. I hope you’re happy wherever you are why is it not quite right yeah, how do we make up mistakes like that because Lacey made mistakes like that too I think irritated you honestly Stephen, some people are a little more of a Socratic him and maybe just not quite like you, you’re a lot like Joe except you really are aware of yourself in a way that he wasn’t.” says Lem.
“ yeah, I realize that it either now or in the afterlife I look like I’m slightly. Why was I so pissed off at her? I think I was pissed off at her mother and I don’t like being snubbed and I think she was snob.” says Steven.
“ I am too yeah we’re snops and we did snap you, but maybe not in such an intensely personal way and less if you want to make it that what the hell is wrong with you? Why do we study? That’s so fucking you know national disaster?” says Lem.
“ I don’t know there really wasn’t anything I have a little bit of a speech impediment and I smell funny and I had bad hygiene. I got really poor and and I am sick. I was not raised well I don’t I don’t think I don’t think she likes me in a romantic way at all.” says Steven.
“ she didn’t I think you might have been able to make her interested but I’m not convinced of it even if you were healthier and better Brett I think there was something about your personality that just did it just didn’t work. It just didn’t work out but I think she likes you as a person. You remind me a tiny bit of Ernest Hemingway and your personality and she doesn’t have a romantic bond with him either. Why couldn’t you just be her friend?“ says Lem.
“ possible yeah crap crap oh crap no I think we we could’ve been friends you know but the problem is that I was attracted to her and I was never honest and I felt I felt like she was stopping me. I’m not even sure she really was if she was stabbing me why was she stabbing me if it wasn’t if I’m not evil in someway and you don’t know that I am or not but if if I wasn’t evil in someway, why was she stopping me how is it not personal?” asks Steven Barger.
“ I am because you seemed menacing and over bearing.” says Lem.
“ if I hadn’t met her through Becca and this is the thing that pisses me off about Becca if I had met her through Becca, would she have thought anything of me at all and that way that I was better singer over bearing?” asks Steven Barger.
“ well, it’s just back up for a second. I don’t know who wrote some thing on this blog and I was gone. I raced it. It was complete nonsense. As far as I can tell I had nothing to do with Lacey and I so getting back to all of that Stephen here’s here’s a thing I think you’re mean I think you’re a bully in disguise And I think that’s why we snubbed you why the hell did you hate Lacey so much let’s just say that you were 150 pounds lighter that you smell like a hot hot jock and that you had all the most sexy clothing of the 2000 era and that you’d come from at least a nicer family if not nice enough But you’re still you and you still found Becca incredibly attractive because you did you really went for Becca and that Lacey had been friends with Becca what would’ve happened?” asks Lem,
“ what do you think would’ve happened?” asks Steven.
“ I think you know I think you know what would’ve happened but you thought too well of yourself to be honest about it all these years. It’s sad because people of lied to you to Stephen possibly and confused Lacey but maybe not completely.
She was kind of had a sense of who you were. She wasn’t a friend with you because she felt sorry for you entirely. There was something about you that wasn’t a complete misfit and that she actually enjoyed is just a person on a Potočnik level, which does beg the question if you had weight loss and how do I close and pursued Becca what could’ve happened?” says Lem.
“ I I’d don’t wanna talk about it.” says Steven.
“ I’ll tell you what I think would’ve happened but what if it’s not accurate that’s where this is sad because if you’re reading this, you’re gonna have to realize that I’m interacting with you but it might be as you are now and not as you could be if that makes any sense?
Hey, so here’s tacos I think that you would have stocked Becca the way that you did, and I think that she would’ve thought it was just hideous and made a huge fuss out of it. But then, at the same time, she would’ve secretly thought it was just wonderful. And if you’d kept asking her out, oh by the third or fourth time you asked her she would’ve agreed him or if you’d gotten into a good conversation with her, she might’ve agreed right away. I don’t remember how you Astor entirely from Lacey‘s perspective, but if I don’t, I’m not mistaken I think you were pretty pretty aggressive and it scared her.
Oh, and that was part of it through Lacey and made her think that you were so over, bearing and monstrous because you were in Becca‘s estimation of you from what she said. And we know if Becca had dated you. This is work at scary. This is work is scary Barger and you’ve gotta stop she might’ve dated you and then this is where you need to be more honest. Did you hate Lacey? Did you hate Lacey?” asks Lem.
“ how do I? I did hate her I did.” says Steven.
“ I know it is if I’m hearing your conscience correctly, you did hate her. Why did you hate her so much?” says Steven.
“On a personal level?” says Steven.
“ yeah but what was it?” says Lem.
“ oh, I’m really honest with you. It freaks me out if I read this book I think I thought she was gay I don’t know for a fact that’s what it is. I think she might just irritate me and I might’ve had to just I don’t know what I would’ve done what I have convince Becca to stop being friends with her or would Becca have used me to hurt Lacey because she would’ve had a boyfriend?” says Steven.
“ yeah she probably would’ve Becca‘s not gonna friend Lacey. I don’t think they were ever friend Stephen. She certainly led lazy to believe that they were but Becca was very two-faced and she wasn’t really that concerned about Lacey‘s feelings so I think they might have been friends, but I don’t know that they were really best friends and I think Becca probably would have used you to hurt to hurt Becca call number Lacey she probably would’ve used to Stephen to hurt Lacey. You know I’ve gone she would’ve been hanging out with you all the time and all the sudden it’s like I don’t have time for you and then because you and Lacey didn’t completely get along, you would’ve probably been annoyed by her friendship with Becca, so they might’ve still been friends but probably not as close as they seem to be without it actually been better. Here’s where it’s weird yeah it would’ve been because then it would’ve been obvious to Becca was and honestly that might’ve been a problem in your marriage because you would avoid knowing that if you were heavy and she smelled funny and had a lisp that she would’ve thought you were just weird friend material, how would you have coped with that knowing that she was that settled as superficial?” says Lem.
“ I think at the time I would’ve thought whatever just superficial, but she loves me anyway Call I say that’s on I might be superficial at times two surprised me empathize with that and I probably would have been fairly happy. Honestly I’m going to probably drive her crazy someday if she’s not married to her soulmate, I am going to probably drive her crazy someday with how hot I am, and how bad she probably wishes she’d married me or dated me and him I look forward to that for personal reasons. Sorry. Because it does hurt a little bit or it does hurt a little. It’s it’s if you think it just hurts that she didn’t get it.” says Steven.
“ you know that’s not Lacey right that really isn’t Lacey you’re thinking of that’s Becca” says Lem.
“ so Lacey was secretly subservient one of the relationship, and Becca was secretly the one in control of everything?” asks Steven.
“ oh, absolutely no reason they’re not friends now is because Becca just stop talking to her for no damn good reason other than the fact that she felt suddenly threatened by Lacey‘s wealth and who the hell knows what else Becca is very obnoxious about the bus and she has an excuse OK what I said just looks like suddenly Becca just flipped out and realize that she was inferior to Lacey and lost her shit and then ghosted her. If you could explain that differently be my guest. Yeah Becca was an absolute bitch if you really liked her good for you, maybe you can explain her to us.” says Lem.
Later.
Turns out Steven Barger might be related very distantly to Lem and Lacey Banks. He likely has one aristocratic distant ancestor who’s not seemingly related to either Lem or Lacey. But they have one working class or middle class ancestor in common. In Maryland? Their last names aren’t ringing bells probably but…someday if this hypothesis is fact they’ll all be able to find the right connections.
Suffice to say…Steven is big. And it’s possible if he’s reading this blog…it’s not just…everyday curiosity. He’s spying on her for Lem’s family. He always was.
Why? Just to see how she’s doing? From a living perspective? Someone must be praying for Steven who’s in contact with Lem’s family.
“I look a tiny bit like him.” says Steven Barger.
“So! What’s up with Becca?” asks Lacey.
“Wait! Are you blood related? Or through the Seays?” asks Steven.
“It’s the Seays, regardless.” says Lacey.
“Becca…” says Steven. “I couldn’t believe how pretty she was.”
“Why though?” asks Lem.
“Is she my Brett Ashley?” asks Steven.
“Maybe?” asks Lacey.
“I’ve moved past her.” says Steven.
“What would have kept you stuck?” asks Lacey.
“Hold up! Lacey you have family jewelry!” says Kira Gustafson.
“Yes!” says Lacey.
“What the fuck do the Nesheims have?” asks Kiira.
“Becca…wasn’t that…cool.” says Steven. “If I’m really related to you two…I worry I’m a snob at times too.” He thinks.
“A an antique 24k gold ring, my vintage 1930’s or 40’s pearls…a vintage 1950’s sterling silver brooch from Norway made by our silversmith family…actually maybe a few of those… Gunhild’s cousin gave the jewelry to her when they visited. …And that might be all. I don’t know.” says Lacey.
“That’s middle class.” says Kiira.
“No. Fuck off!” says Treb.
“It’s not. Kiira…why are you so stubborn???” says Lacey Banks.
“Your father looks like you.” says Kiira.
“Tom? Are you trying to be funny?” asks Lacey.
“I snubbed you.” says Kiira.
“Yes!! My goodness. Look at you!” says Lacey.
“Oh my god! You really-“ says another Jefferson High School graduate.
“What the heck!?”screams Lem.
“I’m better then her!!” they all plead desperately with Hell to maintain.
“No. She was the prettiest girl in school. She just never did shit to look good.” says a popular girl. “And she had acne.”
“True.” says Lacey.
“God! We are masculine.” says the popular girl.
“Yeah.” says Lacey.
“No. It’s the silversmith thing.” says the popular girl.
“Yes!!” says Lacey Banks.
“So the cousin actually made them!?” asks the popular girl.
“YES!!!” screams Steven.
“What? I don’t get it.” says Kiira. “I fake a lot.”
“So…my cousin…legally at least…is like Tiffany. Charles Lewis Tiffany. …They’re not as rich. Or as internationally famous. But…their silversmith items that they made…date back to the 1700’s.” says Lacey.
“Yes! In Norway. Before it was Norway.” says Lem. “So to speak. Anyway, they’ve been favored by kings.”
“Oh wow.” says Kiira.
“So to own one of the family brooches and be in the family…is kind of huge deal.” says Sotheby’s.
“Well…it’s just sterling silver. But…it’s valuable beyond that.” says Lacey.
“How much would it retail for?” asks Lem.
“$500.” says Dr. Billings. “At least!”
“And that’s the Nesheims! Because of Gunhild.” says Kiira.
“Yes!” says Louis.
“Lacey…is…Karen.” says Kiira.
“Yes?” says Lacey. “Is that her name?”
“Yes! Karen Smith.” says Kiira.
“She wasn’t a Karen.” says Lacey.
“No.” says Kiira.
“You’re spacey!” says Treb.
“Yeah. I am.” says Lacey.
“She’s ditzy. But…that was cruelly made fun of by perverted kids in preschool.” says Lem. “So she filled in the spaces with anxiety and intensity.”
“Is it also depression?” asks Treb’s wife.
“Not necessarily.” says Lem.
“So she’s a good narrator. But…she zoned out?” asks a man.
“No. She’s a great narrator. But she goes spacey. Not zoned out. She’s a brilliant person possibly but a ditz.” says Lem. “And she’s not a mean girl.”
Later.
“She’s not a ditz!” says Kiira.
“No! She is slightly!” says Lem.
“Lem what the fuck did she think was happening spiritually when she was sleeping with other people?” asks Chris.
“ Karen Smith isn’t necessarily a cheerleader she could be, but if she became very depressed and was raised by the wrong people she might not be one at all. I think some people will get fixated on her being a lesbian, even if she’s not at all a lesbian and no she’s not. Let’s see…she thought-“ Lem laughs. “that it was the ‘way sex works.’ Which is a very complex idea. Very intelligent. But…extremely ditzy. Poor thing.” says Lem.
“How is it ditzy?” asks Dr. Moritz.
“ Him it’s not stupidity or anything you vote off or lowly really in that way it’s more of a dear people used to laugh at people who are mentally disabled… and it’s not allowed because we now realize that they’re not in on the joke and that it’s just mean or he was knew that we were cruel no way that we aren’t anymore with these pretend not to be Lacey is not mentally disabled him as possible that she’s what’s funny except it wasn’t funny when she slept with other people but I think she’d like me to find it funny and I do slightly. It’s also horrific because she had no idea what she was doing.
So basically, I know she’s not she’s not low IQ she’s a gene she’s brilliant, but it’s dizziness signals like someone extremely intelligent who’s reaching in their sweet quiet do you like way over the moon with her mind and they just get stuck in the state of being flummoxed, and then where some people might recover and try to see him, intelligent she potentially it’s because she lacks almost any ego at all Knowing she has you know it’s that super ego and all that but but she doesn’t have an ego she doesn’t have almost shit barely any ego and she doesn’t realize that she’s being silly or if she does, she doesn’t care and she because she’s so good hearted it becomes lovable because it’s just like what are we doing now, dear do you know why are we wearing that, why are we sleeping with us Christian what could really be going through and that might not be something she would ever have done. Actually it’s not. I should say that Lacey would’ve never done that him but it’s sort of like could could if she was mad because she has plus she was gay, yes she could have except I’m not really a ditz him, but I am her other. I have her Adam so to speak so I would call myself a ditz, but I’m clearly capable of coming to some amazingly off-base conclusions about things that we are possibly astounding to people how could a man act gay and not be gay? How could someone do that I think if you were an old money organization of people, you might be able to imagine it a bit better And I mean that or if you were just old or if you were part of our generation and you were old money, I don’t think you’ll be quite so standing tall of you, but it’s interesting to see your perspective because it must really be that shocking on a certain level to humanity at large am I know what the sad truth is that’s probably how you guys have missed Lacey‘s dizziness though because she’s so intelligent and in command that when she’s ditzy, it possibly goes right over your heads to be honest yeah if SNL it was supposed to be a parity of people Who who played talk who played Tom Hanks, Tom Hanks and why did he call himself Tom Wright and what show was he in Road to perdition? He was in route to perdition probably around the time that that that came out on SNL are pretty close to it probably within a few years of that, that’s possibly not a coincidence Robin Williams was possibly actually Michael Rockefeller very slightly. Bob and I think Tom Banks might’ve been parrot parrot in himself the whole broken screen, a and all of that that might actually be topics. He himself I wonder if it times as much as he was a very commanding person, he could be a little ditzy yeah ditzy OK so Lacey may make very ditzy mistakes or times that might actually be inherited from her father they’re not autistic, but if she’s genetically his daughter, they may be ditzy as much as he was a genius and he ran you know the mob at times he may have been a tiny bit of a ditz And this is the thing they don’t make mistakes hardly ever but that’s not the same thing you can make mistakes while you’re being ditzy but it’s not like a normal mistake mistake it’s more like odd is it’s dizziness I don’t know how else to describe it, look up ditzy.” says Lem. “ I doubt Tom Hanks is actually that clumsy and ditzy. I have a feeling that that was kind of a strange parody of him.
I am, so what did she think? She thought that it made sense she thought it made sense and send me sleepless in Seattle doesn’t seem quite so endearing anymore because Lucius was she was sleepless in Seattle. I mean they prescribed her sleeping pills for a reason when the people start attacking her, I know she thought she had found true love potentially, and that was certainly not the case.
Know if Sean Connery could be Tom Tom’s daughter he actually might’ve been quite tough himself. What did what was she thinking though?
Oh, she was thinking that somehow it operated in us very esoteric intellectually complex system. A bit like a class system, or an ecosystem, or a machinery, like a bit of a bit of machinery. And so she thought that if she didn’t go with the flow as designed by others in an appropriate way in relation to herself that it would be in violation of their free will.
No, she’s not like Jack she isn’t think she has tensions. It wasn’t actually stupid. It’s just it’s a horrendous where Jack was a horrible narcissist trying to up with excuses for his own evil sexual desires. Lacey was trying to find a way in to essentially make no one get hurt with little to no regard for herself for the most part, she refused to be abused and so she wasn’t going to be harmful to her self in that way, but she help very little regard for her own feelings, which is sad, but then at the same time the concept itself is ditzy.” says Lem.
“Was Jack a ditz or was he stupid?“ asks MSNBC.
“ Jack is stupid. Jack is very stupid and very narcissistic. Sometimes narcissistic people can seem ditzy and maybe some of them can be at times but it’s it’s not the same thing Karen Smith residence she wouldn’t of had to be a narcissist to be that duty. at least he just says that it’s Jack was never that did say he was just stupid a narcissistic. And on that note, I really wasn’t gay Laceyz hearing me literally say that and I’m a ghost there’s nothing ditzy about her sleeping with me and repeatedly hearing me say that and then understanding English and the concepts that I’m saying to her.” says Lem.
“ is Bobby ditzy or is Bobby stupid?” asks MSNBC.
“ Bobby is stupid. Why are you always talk to Lacey like you’re her caseworker why does everyone talk to her like they’re like their social worker?” asks Lem.
“ do they talk to her like that everywhere in the world?” asks someone.
“ yes, the queen didn’t specially after a while but no, a lot of people talk to her that way Putin doesn’t either and a lot of dead people don’t she speaks with why do all of you why do most people the only people who don’t are usually attracted to her or they’re probably from a higher social class or they’re dead.” says Lem.
“ do you know who else doesn’t talk to her like that well paid servants per second made people who work at like four-star hotels like the best for four-star hotels who are probably making decent enough money in tips and are usually early 20s late teens. Oh Vallés, young maids him some prostitutes him the super late I think I wondering why though the maids don’t talk to her that way gosh I hope that’s not true. I’m a little worried that it’s the middle class that doesn’t like her, but it may be some discontented poor people, so people who are poor that are doing well and are somewhat happy in their job. Don’t seem to have a problem with her or her happy life in general it’s people who are middle-class who have a problem why is that?” says the Illuminati.
“ that’s an interesting question I think that’s what we’re trying to grapple with tonight and it’s not working because we talked to Steven and then we found out that he was related to me. So…then it doesn’t work. Because he’s so familiar genetically that he doesn’t feel authentically middle class enough. He’s just not one of them enough.
To be honest that was sort of comforting because there’s a very strong chance that he actually somehow was checking up on her in someway you could say it was God but it’s a little creepy. Actually it’s extraordinary creepy but we’re trying to sort of play dumb because people will be too confused by it and then they’ll start searching through family trees, and they may or may not find the relative that we have in common, I mean it’s it would be hard to fine possibly but there they could we could actually be genetically related slightly and no I mean how did they end up at the same school? To know that’s fascinating. Yeah, you were example of Lacey being a ditz. She was trying to relate to him, and she was trying to be loving, and somehow in attempt to be loving to him. She ends up telling him that he was like a father to her. A father, or that she wish that he had been her fuck, which was not just an exaggeration. It was a lie, but it wasn’t mean spirited. It was ditzy, but it wasn’t mean spirited. It wasn’t stupid. It was just kind of ditzy.
I know here’s where if it’s genetic, he responded Siri stupidly, and he was receptive and almost cried, and we kiss very serious, very morose to, and I can possibly relate to that because it’s like he was attracted to her. He didn’t like even that much, but some reason it touched so push that he cried. Maybe that’s not stupidity but then what is that? It’s not necessarily ditzy does either. I don’t know what it is, but I relate to that he’s not a pervert he isn’t. He wasn’t unaware of the fact that that he didn’t like her it’s just some thing about it. He just didn’t get that. It wasn’t really is moving as it seem to be in that moment I know it’s not stupid it’s just Who is he’s not ditzy but now I can relate to that I used to call myself clumsy while I was alive but I don’t think that’s the right word anyway, it’s hilarious and very disturbing him anyway but it was still comforting because it’s like what were they doing? They’re having these conversations That they both remember I was bothered by this day and probably more than her. That’s bizarre know and it does suggest that there’s possibly something supernatural if it’s not him being obsessed with her in an inappropriate way and if it’s not the no there could be some supernatural prompting that he’s experiencing.
Are but no, I mean it just doesn’t work, then to talk to him about the middle class, because even if he is middle class, his ancestry might not be at least entirely in relation to us. If I have enough in common with him genetically, it’s just it’s a wash it just doesn’t work. It’s like crud and I will money find remind me of me number actually slightly related so I don’t think we’re going to get the middle class out of you and that way Stephen indeed.
If we could talk to Becca, we might be able to discern some thing but that’s not going to work so no or or the loss because what is wrong with Lacey that the middle class is so offended by it’s hard to figure it out.” says Lem.
Later.
“ I don’t think Becca‘s middle class anymore.” says her father.
“ oh no she’s very middle class just because they bought a $600,000 house that’s at the top of their price range and they both work does not mean that they’re not middle class that’s extraordinarily middle class sweetie and how much will she inherit from you and your wife?” says Becca’s grandmother.
“ I think they’re upper middle class, but I suppose that is just middle class isn’t it?” says Becca’s dad.
“ yeah their upper middle class would know that it’s just middle class two income earners who are both working who bought a $600,000 house that’s middle-class if they were making $1 million together and they came from your family and you had raised in the little differently for better or worse they might be out of class at this point old. Well yeah they might be well. They might be upper class room they will be up for class. I don’t know if they would be old money but they might be our class their upper middle class though do you know if Stephen had become some thing far more prosperous at and then skinnier and have a better family. I think he would’ve liked him and I don’t think you understand that I think Lacey scared you. I think you guys like her but liked her rather but she scared you. Do you have any idea John why she stopped talking to Lacey out of the blue?” asks Becca’s grandmother.
“ she might’ve gotten her feelings hurt, but I think it’s possible she also um, Lacey became harsh very harsh Rebecca standers maybe not by her husband standards or legal husband standards or a lot of other peoples possibly either but by Becca standards she seemed harsh and I think she just felt too hurt but that that is a little different drastic than a friendship just because someone’s harsh I suspect there was some attempt at snobbery on Becca‘s part even the Lacey‘s at a higher class and all that I think she was trying to snap Lacey anyway it doesn’t make sense because Lacey can’t really be snubbed but I think she was trying to snuff her at doesn’t it doesn’t really make any sense to and I also think there could’ve been some old hardness and Becca‘s part and I’ve had a theory that Becca didn’t want Lacey telling her not to do certain things, because she wanted to just do whatever she wanted to do drink and smoke at and possibly even use drugs yeah I think Becca might have a smoking pot at some point so I think she wanted to smoke pot and be anorexic and drink too much much too much and sleep with men or something like that and Lacey was probably likely to tell her that that was a rotten thing to do.” says Kohn Fuester.
“ why why did she think she could snub Lacey?” asks Becca’s grandmother.
“ it’s the funniest thing I think she is much as she was being evil. Still thought she had some moral high ground where it’s like I’m not harsh I am loving kind person. Somehow I go to church. I am evil, but I am very loving and because I’m loving that’s the decent way to be, you’ll have to understand Lacey that’s just not how we are that’s not the right way to behave and I think I might just be nuts that idea though it’s just her to be like people shouldn’t be so harsh. I little better than you in that way and someday you’ll just have to understand that that’s just not how people behave..” he says.
“ OK so it’s sort of an invented form of snobbery based on some confused view of the world potentially, but how is it confused because I think she somehow had some idea that good prevailed in a way that it might not. It’s also potentially a complete massacre in her understanding of Lacey‘s personality and I don’t think she realized how hard Lacey or is trying to be kind. I think she just assumes like many people do that. Lacey is just naturally the sweetest person I know she is, but a lot of that is a choice to some degree should be loving. Her personality is a great deal more complex than just sweet and phlegmatic. I don’t know if Becca ever understood that him so at the time that Becca was trying to snuff her I don’t know if Becca ever understood how wild Lacey‘s life had become Lacey Lacey was a Lacey was wild and a black I was not wild.” says Lem.
“How so?” he asks
“ she wasn’t she wasn’t necessarily rebellious. Becca might’ve been slightly rebellious. She wasn’t really a partier. Becca might’ve been a bit of a partier and she wasn’t necessarily like that but I think Rebecca was possibly doing things that seemed probably more impressive to people like smoking pot with friends and getting their approval that’s not how it happened with Lacey she tried that once, but it was not a situation where people were trying to be her friend really and reality ad was a totally different experience to Becca. I have a feeling Becca experienced a far more normal life than Lacey so hopefully that’s enough consolation for all of you.
I am Lacey used pot ones and a brownie and that really is the only time she ever use pot. She hated it but I don’t think she would’ve done it again anyway and it was a very good brownie. She had it with lasagna. It was homemade lasagna, and it was a homemade brownie. And it was a different situation than Becca. Rebecca was probably smoking pot and getting high. Lacey had a horrible hallucination experience and felt like she had fallen into hell for a couple of hours. It was awful and I don’t think she if she’d had a good experience that she would have done it again anyway. But she did do it and had a horrible experience and decided never to do it again.
Hey, people are being very disrespectful of my intelligence and Lacey‘s intelligence right now, but anyway people were snorting cocaine at the party. Lacey was that you were cocaine addicts, and so she was surrounded by drug addicts and drunkards. There was a pot salesman actually at the party and they were wild people. I doubt that’s who Becca was Hanging out with. That was the last time Lacey and first time at Lacey ever use drugs her books. I don’t think she ate the whole brownie of Endo. I hit a Soho she thought it’s just pot and it’s just a brownie and I’m not going to use anything else but I want to make sure that I’m not totally off base in my perception of drug use.
And she wasn’t. She wasn’t off-base at all I think within the first hour after using her pot brownies, she realized oh yes, my perceptions were correct. This is miserable and I’m stuck like this. How did she know that if she wasn’t reincarnated maybe I told her but now oh she’s a wild person better way, but when she is when she’s with people who Owe that I say this she’s a wild person she’s not evil but she’s wild. I don’t think Becca knew that so I think when Lacey was talking to her so harshly, it was actually an attempt to be more honest with Becca and get closer to her, not in a weird way, but just to try to maintain their friendship over a long distance so Does sort of say things have changed I’m a little different now in someways him I’m a little more rambunctious or something him and I think Becca may be took that the wrong way and thought that somehow Lacey didn’t care about her feelings anymore or some thing and she did I know she called Becca a liar And say that that’s where I know she meant it in a loving way, but I think she was trying far too hard to help Becca how edit probably became a it probably just became untenable because it was just too disturbing to Lacey.” says Lem.
“ what was too disturbing?“ says John.
“ oh, what was too disturbing? Oh wow it was too disturbing she I think she felt that Becca I think she feel like she was losing her friend because she Becca had never really told Lacey that she found black men attractive. She always pretty much said the opposite, so Lacey didn’t realize that Becca was finding black men attractive and it seems like Becca was dating all of these black men edit didn’t make sense because Becca and I said I don’t find black men attractive not really him and then all the sudden she was dating tons of black men and it’s just didn’t. it seem very disturbing because it was like why are you doing this to them and why are you doing this to yourself?
She also and didn’t really understand why Becca was dating all these men that seem to be scum and then defending them so adamantly seemingly and then it says like oh these married men are these terrible liars and then she’s sort of so I’m not defending that but I think it really seems like in reality she was and that was but essentially Lacey was accusing her of lying about when she said you’re just a liar The idea was no you’re lying to cover up for their evil. You’re just a liar Marizol face it you’re a liar and shit. She meant it in this very intense way, but I think she might’ve assumed Becca would take it that way, but wasn’t she was, she wasn’t saying you were always lying for sure it was more like you’re a liar, in this moment, you’ve made yourself a liar and you are now a liar or are you always a liar I don’t know what is your character it was yes it was to sort of extol her to sort of help her see the air of her ways am in a sense of innocence to sort of help her to sort of help her arm, and to sort of help her come to grips with the reality of who she was in her sin.
At least he was in a very bad marriage at that point and I think she was potentially horrified that Becca was going to end up in a bad bad marriage as well. I so know she was trying to be very helpful and I know I see Becca was incredibly disrespectful to Lacey just as a person I know why are you so upset? Why is your whole family like that you are a respectable family I don’t get the sense that when Lacey was there you were a party why are you suddenly so I’ll party in this conversation And why is Becca set a turncoat? She really did break Lacey‘s heart and not in a romantic way, but it really hurt cause I think she thought she had a real good friend and it shocked her that she couldn’t handle being confronted with her own sin.” says Lem.
“ who is she? We’re not we’re not uppity people by nature necessarily. I’m glad Lacey saw that you might’ve seen that too. When she was visiting us. I don’t know I don’t know necessarily I don’t know my daughters heart and that way necessarily who is Blackman fascinates me though I think there might be something to that what did it sounds like she just made an objective blanket observation, and said I don’t like black men I don’t find them attractive which is concerning to me because her husband‘s black and I I wonder if that was a lie I don’t know why she chose to say that I’m a little worried Becca was racist him off and I I don’t know that it was outright racism, but I suspect there were some prices in there, because why would she have been getting into these relationships with all of these black men starting a college it seems like and then married one on that doesn’t make sense if she doesn’t find them attractive at all um, I don’t think she’s confused the way that you were. I doubt that I mean that’s possible never gonna be very complex confusing some other way thinking that’s the best she can do which is I have a feeling what she told Lacey like I can’t do better than black man, yeah that’s probably what she said isn’t it I I can’t do better than black man that’s those are the only men who are interested in me, so I’ll just have to did that because those those are the only men interested in me.
Which is the most racist thing to say the action went to be racist at all but I think I might’ve been a lie in Motor. Oh OK so slow about that that is really disturbing. I don’t consider that suggest that she was hiding things from Lacey that were probably rather serious, about her taste and personality and who knows what else am that is very disturbing because insect why was she being like that? She has always had a hard time making friends she’s always had a hard time making close friends.
I wonder if Becca was not entirely straight out and had some problems I don’t think Lacey is anything but straight but if Becca wasn’t entirely straight up, then maybe she misunderstood their friendship and is very deep closet level which is not some thing that Lacey would ever believe if I’m not the one saying that I don’t know who is making me say that but I don’t think Lacey entirely believes it and love you probably know the difference but I am I’ll just say that for Lacey doesn’t know that I’m saying this or someone else’s but no if I am at all I don’t think Becca was straight. I think she was so much bisexual, I don’t think Lacey entirely knew that so she might have lied here in there simply because she wasn’t really being honest to begin with about what was going on in her head him. I don’t think and they were roommates is not funny at all. they do the meals together to some degree but no, they weren’t a couple Eight I don’t think I don’t think Lacey realizes how incapable some people are of deep relationships that are sexual it’s just us it’s so pathetic because it’s not maybe normal at all I think they were friends and I don’t think anything sexual ever happened we did have them sleep in the same bed watts at our house But I know nothing and nothing happened. They weren’t there far away from each other the entire time I think Lacey would’ve been extraordinarily disturbed if anything it happened. Um, no nothing happened. No nothing happened but if Lacey I thought she was a lesbian, I hit what I don’t think she could’ve been that you know she’s just not you, but no, nothing happened, you’re very esoteric lame and you’re thinking Lacey is possibly more aware even though she’s ditzy in that way I wonder that’s interesting and yet I don’t think you’re not you know a man who can appreciate things but he but that’s him his sister Irving I think she really thought Becca was her best friend and that it was entirely platonic I know she called Becca once in her marriage was really having a rough moment and Becca was not helpful and I I would bet that that’s probably been very it was very hurtful to Lacey because I think she thought she had a friend. Someone to really talk to.
Not someone who she could talk to would just not be interested because she was with someone else but some someone who was genuinely just a friend him that’s sad because that’s the premise of what was open and that’s what Lacey thought it was I don’t know why Becca would’ve been dishonest in that way That’s disturbing but I suspect that she wasn’t always honest about certain things.
I worry Becca cursed herself. I don’t know, but I have a feeling Becca crusher self somehow slightly. She might not be as mentally stable as she should be and that’s disturbing. She should’ve been more honest with Lacey and said something like sometimes I just wish one of us was a guy I wish you were a guy I wish I was one because I’m sure someone said that’s what Lacey wants and that’s disturbing but the Becca should’ve said that at least she would’ve been worried but I don’t think she would’ve been nearly as devastated when Becca just ghosted her after Lacey got married People really don’t handle things well and that way anymore seemingly almost ever and it’s so disturbing you know it’s like she was worried that she was nuts probably but then you know you should be aware that you have that problem and just say yeah well we’re best friends but sometimes it’s like I worry there’s something wrong with me.
It’s possible Becca so much bipolar or there’s something all off about her and that way in which case I wonder if maybe she ghosted her too without thinking about it and has regretted it since there’s a pretty good chance she reads this blog and I’m sure if Lacey knows that she’s worried That she could be hurt if she has any feelings at all I just say human level not as a lover.“ he says.
“ I don’t think I’m quite that grotesque. I get so irritated by women I am very feminine and this is why I wish I just majored in art history and give it up because I get so sick of it. I have a feeling if Becca reads his blog she thinks I’m a monster or she would say that if she ever saw me I don’t hate her, but I don’t understand her and I thought we were friends and I guess we’re not I don’t know him and I say that it’s like obviously we’re not friends but I mean I guess we’re not friends at all and we never were that sad. that’s very sad. Feel rather stupid because I used to really open up to her at times and apparently it was just falling on Hells ears or something.” says Lacey.
“ you’re never going to love me in that way ever again.” says Becca.
“ as my best friend are maybe that was fake maybe you were experiencing love, but you didn’t really receive it in someway that was real in which case it was just fake is that sad and then no I will never love you that way again because I was loving a friend who didn’t exist.” says Lacey
“ are you a psychopath Becca?” asks Lem.
“I might be wondering the same thing in my subconscious right now are you a psychopath Becca just worried what do you think but what Lacey just said do you have a reaction to it or not?” says Steven
“ I am I can choose to just stop caring about people at a moments notice.” says Becca.
“ what triggers that response?” asks Lem.
“ when things are just too frustrating or annoying and I just don’t want to bother.” says Becca.
“ do you think you’ll ever stop loving your kids or have you already?” asks Lem.
“ no I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving them. Um do I love my kids.” says Becca.
“ I really wish to God Lacey had never met you in someways and yet she did you did you were a good friend at times but no you really you I wish she just said I wish you never met you and yet she did experience what a friendship could be like in a way, so it’s debatable but I wish she never met you because you really didn’t deserve her as a friend and I really don’t think she has much interest in trying to be anyone’s friend ever again because you’re a kind of a psychopath to her and so it’s like why bother someone could pretend really damn well I’m at the end of the day. Who’s there go their feelings see you later like you’re a zombie when you die whatever part of that was sinful you’re going to regret it if it’s not just instant heaven because you do a Lacey apology for being horrendous potentially.” says Lem.
“ do you know who else shows an apology to a child who died who starve to death I might be that child I believe me lady I needed you to take care of the situation not just sit there on your fat little ass bigger bitch.” says a dead girl.
“ i’ll follow protocol.” says Becca.
“ yeah you did but you could’ve also tell a tall you could’ve totally figured out that you needed to sort of step in and you didn’t do that how many other kids have died because you’re a psychopath?” she asks.
“Well possibly a few others.” says Becca.
“ so is it a psycho pathic protocol or are you a psychopath?” asks the girl.
“it’s it’s really old I have a feeling Becca is a little bit of a psychopath at times and I have a feeling that the procedure itself is a psychopath.” says Lacey.
“I just said that to Lacey she’s talking way too late at this point and honestly that was we called her higher self. I don’t know that was her higher self but that was some part of her possibly Becca I am I really don’t know that you’re her friend. I think you gave her the wrong impression and she thought you were friends apparently you’re not dear. I don’t think you’re a complete failure at work but I am I don’t think everyone’s particularly pleased with you, my dear, and I think you have to get used to that reality that some people aren’t going to be pleased with you because you’ve actually made it real mistake, and someday I think when you die and you have more normal emotions it’s going to bother you in a way that maybe your brain isn’t capable of processing right now and I do not envy you are what are you going to Phyl extraordinarily embarrassed, and bizarre sensations of logging, not sexual, but longing to be friends with people or see them or miss they just gonna miss people in ways that you’ve never miss people before no not not just sexual just in general and you’re probably going to feel really weird about a lot of choices that you made and it’s going to fairy much creep you out and I think you’re going to make me realize that if you’d been yourself, you might not have been capable of being friends with Lacey at all because I think you would’ve seemed to I think he would’ve had too many friends, and I don’t think that you probably would have made as much sense to Lacey sadly based on how she was raised, I think she would’ve probably thought. I don’t think that person really wanna be my friend and that may not be true but that’s how she would’ve perceived you. Oh, and I don’t think you would’ve gone out of your way to be friendly to her and I think you might’ve been nice but I don’t know that you were even friends of us at all. Um, so sad isn’t it?
I think Lacey probably would a major in art history her sophomore year at Messiah if you never been her friend because she would’ve thought my life is just a total piece of shit and I can’t make friends. I can’t find anyone to be in love with meeting men and I don’t know how I’m ever going to live the most at all, so I think I’m just going to major in our history because there’s nothing else that seems pleasant enough, everything else is just too damn depressing.“ says a woman
“ yeah I would where would she have gotten married?” asks Becca.
“ would you have gotten married? Do you really don’t care that much do you want a personal level? Why do you care at all?” asks a woman.
“ I care because I’m curious.” says Becca.
“ OK then you should probably say it in a way like you’re better than her to know she went to have gotten married necessarily at all. She would probably be dead by now. Not by suicide probably because she would’ve started praying to die by the time she was in her late 20s almost every night if not do it while she was at Messiah I don’t I don’t think I would’ve let that go by for 15 years if she was praying every night adamantly, and then yes she probably would’ve had my kids in heaven but what that sad is it do you understand why that satyrs are you too stupid and useless as a being?” asks Lem.
“ I IDK if I care that much.” says Becca.
“ that’s not normal.” says the CIA.
“ are you going to hell or not?” asks Lem.
“ you know you might be going to hell right now Becca if you actually are rejecting Christ if you read this blog, please stop assuming the guy doesn’t understand who you are and please stop assuming that you don’t matter and start really repenting because I am sure you can be saved, but you need to be sincere about it. It can’t just be a façade that you project yourself, if you’re choosing not to care about people or you’re choosing to just not care about things that you can’t do that you can’t reject Christ you just can’t so maybe you wouldn’t go to hell maybe your salvation is more secure than that and that’s good but just be careful because even if you aren’t going to hell I don’t want you to harm yourself spiritually if you can’t care about people or you just can’t care then maybe just repent of that and say I’m sorry if I’m choosing not to care somehow.” says Lacey.
“ hey Siri, I’m not depressing note I hope that brat Ashley and Alys Seay have a wonderful time with their husbands because damn that’s fucked up. I’m sorry for swearing and they were absolute bitches but through God‘s mercy and grace they’re not in hell and if there’s purgatory, their husbands are following them around everywhere, well I have to talk to the dead define anyone who gives a damn lie being tortured by the illuminati and I far superior to those two callous worms and you know I hope that I’m not saying that because I think that somehow my humanity mattered more than there’s necessarily. At least I hope I didn’t and a godly sense it’s more just it’s ghastly, it’s absolutely despicable that me as a human in my beauty and superiority and kindness, which is real superiority in a way what was never loved and I’m aging and it was never enjoyed. It was never properly enjoyed as a friend or a lover or a child I was never unless if I’m illegitimate, and then I was loved as a child. I was never properly enjoyed as a human being at all and I had a Normas amount to offer someone, I don’t really care. I get angry about that the way that I do global warming to some degree. It’s disgusting it’s like pollution. It’s absolutely disgusting. It’s the principle of it someone as beautiful as me should not have gone totally to waste well excuses are endlessly made for foreign straps, who look like shit, and can barely imagine being faithful, much less be faithful, this is an evil versus good in a rich way versus poor it’s it’s despicable nonsense and I look forward to the explanation from God but right now I am not exactly pleased because it makes absolutely no sense and it’s really disturbing.” says Lacey Banks.he’s
“It bothers me to just on a human level but also as an artist it’s really disturbing it really is trust me. I am objective and it is it’s it’s just gross as hell.” says Mary z Tyler Moore.
“ yeah, I think we were a little too far with Lacey in them, separating them, making them gay, making them make a total fool of himself, torturing him as he aged, and then ruining his entire life story and making people masturbate to him who were men while his wife was being statistically raised in a world that just can’t figure out what the fuck to do with her when it’s really fucking simple to she’s probably one of the nicest people that I’ve ever met and I’m just being honest and say that yeah I think we probably went to far so there’s a very good chance that if she did dies in him God allows it she really will in the world because I think maybe things went a little too far and that won’t even be enough and that’s we’re gods God and I’m possibly being forced to say this
L
“ I
Keen to Cross the Pond 