I Hire Out

“I’m a psychopath hired by the Illuminati to do the dirty work. I organize the killings of people. I organize the hostage situations for children. I have long straggly hair and I look like a freak, but not really. I guess some people may think I look cool, but I am a genuine psychopath.

I was raised fairly well, and I made my way into the occult and freemasonry so by the age of 35 I was being hired out.

I am calm. I’m easy to work with and I do all their dirty work.” says a male 50 something psychopath.

Blue Boy by Mac DeMarco plays.

“They’re too scared to do it themselves, and they lie and think that somehow there’s a loophole in Heaven where if I do it, it doesn’t count.” says the psychopath laughing at them.

“But you are the one accountable.” says a famous actress.

“You’re the one paying me.” says the psychopath.

“But we’re paying you?” she says.

“Yup!” he says, getting annoyed.

“Yeah. I’m confused now too!” says JFK’s residual energy too.

“Oh my god!!” says the Hollywood actress. She laughs like a weird freak.

“Why are you all so stubbornly stupid?” asks the psychopath.

“Because there’s no afterlife! Right? That’s what the big boys in charge say right, Mac? And that’s what Bill Gates says sometimes and I like Bill Gates he is really rich!

So I was told by my producer that there is no afterlife and by people who are really smart, so I guess that’s just how it goes? And this is all we have!

*she looks scared*

So if I have to crush the skulls of innocent children to look hot in a movie, then I’ll do it bitch! Look…my ego means more than anyone’s life to me. There’s no afterlife and nothing matters! Right?

I can do whatever the hell I want and I reason it through that way. I reason it threw that-a-away. But that make no sense.” she says in her native peasant white whore tongue.

“Have you seen the ghost at the meetings?” asks the psychopath.

“Gee yeah, I guess!” she says in her native peasant white whore tongue.

“So then what’s that?” asks the psychopath.

“Well them is just holograms and shit. Gee! It’s just science.” she says, chewing gum loudly.

“Well let me explain something to you. When you pay me money to kill people it’s still is on your tab. You’re still the one being charged for it.” he says.

“But that don’t make no sense! When I pay maids to do the work they sure as hell won’t let me take credit for that, so why do I have to take credit for what you do when I pay you?” asks the Hollywood actress.

“Well you don’t get credit for the work that I do hurting people, but you do have to be a part of the sin. Just like when you pay your maid you get to take credit for having a clean house.” says the psychopath.

“That’s creepy all that intelligence stuff. What the fuck!?” says the Hollwood actress.

Blue Boy by Mac DeMarco plays.

“I don’t like that either.” says a bourgeois man in the Illuminati in business.

“Why are you people doing stuff that that that’s not evil? Do you really need to?” asks a witch.

“Well yeah, we sure do!” says the actress.

“Why?” asks George Bush.

“Oh well, some of us just enjoy evil and we’re in an occultish organization so we just cater to each other’s needs like a super cool country club. Basically we make everyone’s wishes come true if you’re in. So if you join Illuminati you got to have all of your best wishes come true. See…what I tell myself is it’s just it’s like all your best wishes. And then you get to hobnob with people who have cool old money names like Rockefeller and then sometimes you get to feel really special. And let me tell you something…there are other reasons why we have to hurt people too. See what is them? If we don’t do it other people will and we’re trying to intimidate those people. See we’re trying to be scary.” says the actress.

“So you’re evil and demented and then you also want to scare people?” asks Kiira.

“Lem was gay!” says an American gay man.

“Was he?” asks Lem.

“Eww now you’re turning at us!! Oh my God. I don’t know what I’m gonna do. I can’t figure this out.” say American gays.

“Well this is just hypothetical, but what if you’re right and I really was gay?” says Lem.

“Then you’re not real!” say gay men.

“No, I’m extremely real.” says Lem. “But what if I’m not what am I then?”

“Hey then you’re just a god and I have a crush on you!” say gay men.

“OK and I hear people backing up the bullshit you just said but let’s just keep going. So then you’re in love with me?” asks Lem.

“Yeah. No I’m not in love with you.” say gay men.

“Then what is this?” asks Lem.

“You’re just not special enough to be with me.” say gay men.

“Do you have a brain or is Bobby just controlling all of you?” asks the CIA.

Blue Boy by Mac DeMarco plays.

“We kind of liked Ted Kennedy. And like…the concept of Democratic ‘hotties.’” say American gay men.

“So you’re mad at me that I’m not putting out for Jack?” asks Lem of America gay men.

“No, I mean you guys were in love, right?” asks American gay men.

“What if we weren’t?” asks Lem.

“See two can play at that game. I can trick you into saying lies, and they make you concede reality like a witch.” say gay American men, excited.

“And I just can’t let it go! If Lem’s not gay then I don’t. I just can’t handle it.” says a cool-kid Illuminati woman.

She looks like these people:

“Umm it isn’t any of those specific people that we’re talking to, we don’t think.” says Lem Billings. “Those are all the exact same type of women, and there are many women like that in the Illuminati who are ‘know-it-all experts at everything‘.”

“Those are our bestest friends!” say all American gay men.

“Oh, so they don’t want Lacey to be happy because then they lose their shit and start peeing their pants and you’re just trying to be helpful.” says Lem.

“So what? Lem, you’re gay!” say American gay men.

“Say you’re gay! Say you’re gay! Say you’re gay!” the American gay men say.

Blue Balls by Mac DeMarco plays.

“You know really what happens if I say that is that I just end-up being raped by you. It doesn’t change the nature of who I am. See that became impossible when I died. And some people are possibly more in Limbo than other people. I wasn’t in Limbo that way at all. You really can’t take that away from me. I really was straight. And you guys are freaks.” says Lem to possibly all American gay men.

“I just don’t like that because then I feel less rightfully self-important and I kinda just wanna die cause I’ve made a total fucking failure of my life.” says Meryl Streep.

“Hey! Maybe in a way you have.” says Lacey.

Mac DeMarco “Blue Boy” plays.

“Yeah, you don’t feel sorry for me which is actually respectful, but I am a brainwashed pseudo-intellectual in that way, and I have a very hard time accepting that there’s an afterlife even though there’s plenty of evidence to suggest that there is. So it’s just sort of stupid isn’t it?“ says Meryl Streep.

“Yeah, who keeps hanging on to the stupidity of old Hollywood stars like Meryl Streep. Meryl I’m not in love with you but that doesn’t make me gay. Yeah, you were a pretty girl, but there were lots of pretty women and they’re not as pretty as Lacey but they’re also just not Lacey it’s not a hard concept.

I’m sorry you’re another disappointment. I have been shocked by how many pseudo intellectual people there are running the world right now in America. Who was covering for all of you?” asks Lem.

“I was. I was. So were a lot of other people who are now dead.” says George Bush Senior.

Blue Boy by Mac DeMarco plays.

“Do you know what? I really have a weird feeling that Lem might have been gay. I think Lem was gay! Does anyone else get that sense?” says Bobby with a herd of demons.

“Oh my God Bobby don’t do it! Bobby they can’t handle it!” say a bunch demons pretending to be living people.

“You know, I’d love to hear you guys actually have a same conversation where you’re not trying to be witches and alter reality. You’re altering reality or it’s not working.” says Lem.

“Hey, I don’t care about reality. I just lie and say that it always was reality even if it’s not true because I’m gay and I’m really special.” say most American gay men, like actual freaks from Hell.

“Oh my God you guys she’s attacking all gays! See that! See she’s a homophobic freaked! Oh, oh my god! She’s a homophobic freak City Hall. Oh my god she’s trying to attack. OK then! Oh my God! We’ve got stopper! We gotta stop her!” says Bobby.

“Eww…you’re not one of us. I’ll just kill Lacey so she can go be with Jack. I mean so she can go be with Lem because she’s Jack reincarnated!” say most American gay men. “Grow-up, Lacey! You dog catcher! You horseradish queen of demons! Rub your snakes on the sofa!” they say before going into demonic convulsions.

“Hi!

I don’t I don’t know that I am sold on the idea that Lem was gay.

I’m not- …I kind of wonder if he was just faking it.

I’ve seen some of his photos and I’ve studied them and be honest I think maybe Americans are a little backward in that way. Lacey‘s not umm…but I think a lot of Americans are. Sorry!

You can fake matter isms. All the fucking day! But to be honest, I have listened to Lem and seen him and there is something straight about his his overall energy. I seem like Jack but I’m not Jack reincarnated? Huh? Yeah…but like I’m gay…and that’s probably why. Right? I seem like Jack. I seem like Michael. Michael might have been bisexual. See? It’s our homosexuality!

I’m like why is it like hard for you people to process that? Even if it’s not normal and that’s insanity and honestly I’m-I’m not convinced that it is at all because I am an actual practicing gay. I don’t just fake it and then have weird sexual experiences with Playboy. I don’t need Playboy to get hard around men. I look at a naked man and they turn me on. See I’m a normal gay person. So that’s real.

If he’s a ghost and he was faking it and I think that’s possible what-why are we so attached to them? I’m just-I’m just curious. Because there are a lot of really hot gay men! I’m arguably at least slightly one of them. Why would you guys not understand that in America?” says a handsome gay man in Brazil.

“To be perfectly honest as mean as it is I don’t know why gays want to take credit for this look:

hit he looks mentally disabled, more than gay. He looks like he always had a congenital learning disorder. That’s not really a gay look either. There’s nothing like gay about his hair or dress. I mean you could sort of say there’s something about the fabric of his turtleneck that slightly gay. But when you actually look at his body, he doesn’t look gay. He’s buff even in this picture, but he doesn’t really look gay to me. I actually find this picture extraordinarily disturbing.

No, the fabric of the turtleneck is a little bit OK maybe but not necessarily. It could actually be the opposite. His facial mannerisms make me want to laugh and cry at the same time because I feel like he still is trying to look gay slightly at least but because he’s like fried from drugs it’s not working, and he just looks mentally disabled.

Something else that I don’t think you people have processed is that you’re hearing your jaded, American, sorry if that’s mean, clouded opinion of him. And then you’re hearing Lacey‘s opinion. You guys are in an echo chamber. I look at his energy and he seems cold as ice to me sexually.

I’m a good looking man and I can get laid, and I’m not used to men not noticing me at least a little when they’re gay or bisexual or pansexual. Oh, that sounds mean but it’s just true and no I can sense if he was looking at me if I was there, I would have to imagine him finding me attractive and if I looked into his eyes, I feel like he wants to kill me.

I would bet that when Lacey looks into his eyes and interacts with him, he’s very sexually violent towards her and it’s probably not inappropriate, but it scares her slightly and so she sort of backs away and you people read that as him being homosexual and her being afraid of him because he’s homosexual. She might even think that herself but I don’t think that’s what it is.

Umm so that’s where Lacey is probably sort of a ditz and she probably thinks, ‘Oh no! What is homosexual?’ I don’t think you’re ever going to get her to do a proper reading of this picture because I have a feeling in this picture that she is being overtaken by him sexually. And the scary truth is I don’t think she’s ever processed that part of her heterosexuality. It’s not that she’s into old men. There’s something about him that she finds attractive that I don’t think she’s ever processed and that’s probably terrifying to her. And if this-if this analysis seems too plausible and rational, stop yourself and ask you why that offends you.” says hot gay Brazilian.