“Where Did Jack Get His Power?” by J. Edgar Hoover

The Lion Sleeps Tonight by The Tokens plays.

“Wow! Abbie. How long?” asks Israel.

A white supremacist laughs.

“No. That’s not Jesus.” says Abbie.

“What does he actually look like?” asks Lem.

“Like this:

And he’s fine. I mean…okay.” says a living black woman.

“No. That’s not Jesus.” says Lem. “What does he look like Abbie?”

“Mm. Yeah?” says Abbie.

“Poopie-kaka!” says Jonah Wiley.

“Summer” by Vivaldi plays.

“Something tells me he looked more like this:

But far darker.” says Lacey.

“And you’d probably be right.” says Lem.

“Dammit.” says Abbie. “He looks like a stuffy asshole. I couldn’t make pasta and screw him.”

“Nope. Oops? Right?!” says Lacey.

“Okay. Lacey…you aren’t wrong. And…I was unclear.” says Lem.

moonflower by Abbie Gamboa plays as Abbie flounders around in the dark looking for Jesus’s penis.

“Abbie…are you fucking senile? You are trying to screw God the Father.” says Eugene Levy.

“Eww! You just had to reference London!?” says Lacey to Abbie Gamboa.

“That’s an ugly flower though.” says Lem.

“Lem I just feel terrible.” says Lacey.

“And I’m the one at fault.” says Lem.

“Why weren’t you clearer!?” asks Lacey.

“SHIT!” says Lem.