Just in the last week or so Lacey has discovered that Princess Kate is missing from the public eye. …And being Lacey…she’s…hilariously unaware in an eccentric way. Some people might find it embarrassing but as long as Lem loves her…she doesn’t mind being a ditz.
Yes. Lacey might know exactly or close to exactly what’s going on. And you’d think knowing…and then seeing evidence of knowing in the press would help Lacey feel less insane for believing the Illuminati meetings she attends aren’t…attempts…on…Diego‘s part to apologize for confusing her psychologically eight years ago…but…she’s determined to hold on to doubt until she can thoroughly check her sources. No. She had a long conversation with Kate…in…January? And the ghost of Grace Kelly might have shown-up to offer love and encouragement to Kate…if ghosts are allowed to interact with the living at all. Diana also visited. Yes. They quickly appeared and then vanished. As per usual. …At first at the Illuminati meetings (?) you think you’re losing your mind…and then you wonder…after reading about the Witch of Endor if the ghosts are real. …And you pray to Jesus and get the sense that they are. And…suddenly the Catholic Church becomes large and scary and you feel like hotel slipping into the Middle Ages. It’s…terrifying…to someone who was born in America post 1900?
…Anyway…Lacey’s worried about Kate now. Last she heard she was…resting. If Lacey is correct in her interpretation of things it really is health issue. And if Kate didn’t address it…it could have been deadly. She’s always going to have to be a little careful maybe. No extreme sports? Maybe? Poor dear. She worked and works incredibly hard. Lacey has always admired her…but…worried she was doing the impossible. Maybe Kate is a perfectionist and pushed her body a little too far to do her job well as a member of the Royal Family.
Maybe…people don’t realize how difficult it is to do the job of being a Princess. It looks easy. But…the British aren’t…sloppy when it comes to such titles. They take them profoundly seriously.
…Clearly…it’s a tumultuous, traumatic time for the Royal Family. …And…it’s impressive how well they’re doing actually. Facing the waves of the 21st Century, so to speak. They’re doing very well considering.
Thing is…a few weeks back…or was it more recently (?)…like last week (?)….Lacey…felt as if…Lem had become King of Scotland. Remember?
Of course…if there’s reincarnation he’s Emperor Constantine. Literally. If there’s reincarnation in the Bible…he’s genuinely Emperor Constantine. …And he was married to Lacey and they were British aristocrats in the 1800’s…seemingly. Seemingly he died in World War I. But…if all politics are local…it feels personal to Lacey. When she writes on this blog and talks telepathically with people…it feel personal. And somehow…she fails to…realize it’s place in other people’s minds. She gets it from her perspective. And her perspective is bizarrely…personal. Whether that’s due to reincarnation or not is God the Father’s business.
“I put myself in charge for everyone’s safety.” says Lem. “God…is letting me intervene more than usual to sort of steady the helm. But if I’m not Constantine…don’t worry. I’m sharing my duties with others who are far more capable.”
“How’s Tom?” asks a Princess.
“He’s probably okay.” says Matthew Perry. “If he’s not in Hell.” He laughs. “Seriously. If he’s someone who worshipped Christ…he’s not…happy to be dead…but…he’s fine.”
Princess Kate laughs.
“Why did he die!?” asks Piers Morgan.
“You know why!” says Tom. “Come on! You know why.”
Piers nods and smiles. “I have some suspicions.”
“I’m a fuck-up. In some way or another. …I made some mistake. …Maybe I discovered Zelenskyy was dead and that’s why I died. Right?” he says, ending with a joke.
“Yes. Lacey thought Prince Charles II had misspelled Zelensky’s name the other day on Instagram. She worried he was drugged or something.” says Princess Beatrice.
“Yes. Exactly.” says Lacey, laughing at herself.
“Lacey…isn’t an idiot though.” says Tom.
“No. I’m really not.” says Lacey.
“She’s just my ditz.” says Lem.
“Yes.” says Lacey.
“So you’re trying to protect us?” says King Charles III.
“If I’m allowed to at all…by God…then yes. It isn’t…outside of Christian parameters though.” says Lem. “So…that has to be kept in mind.”
“I’m exhausted!” says King Charles III.
“I trust God that you’ll improve.” says his Great Uncle Edward.
“All things considered…you’re all doing well.
President Biden is…a bloody mess.
Europe is in chaos to some degree.
The world economy is terrified but hopeful…but…on edge.
China is concerned.
Africa is extremely stressed-out.
And let’s hope Canada doesn’t completely burn down this summer. Or South America or Portugal or Australia or…Estonia.
I think…you’re suffering. But considering…you’re all being admirable. It’s why I love the British.” says Lacey.
Princess Kate cries.
“Yes. You’re all so stoic. But…what’s wrong with defiance? Godly defiance?” says Lacey.
“I just don’t want to be unhealthy.” says Kate.
“True! But…everyone breaks down. There’s a flaw with every way of being. And being strong is good…if it’s Godly. You just have to take care of yourself. And really do it. Relax. Trust God. All that. You’re doing well.” says Lacey.
“Am I?” asks Kate.
“Well…you got tired. In a way. And older. And we are getting closer to death you know.” jokes Lacey. “Our bodies are preparing to end. Preparing to land. So…we have to be especially careful and prepared and not too demanding maybe? The landing process is stressful enough.”
“What is the landing process?” asks Kate.
“Yeah! We are our bodies. If I’ve seen ghosts…our bodies are us. So…I imagine it’s sad. Because…it feels…weird. Of course in Christianity before the Fall of Man we didn’t die. And I think that was more natural. We didn’t ever land. But…maybe God makes the whole thing even fun? If you trust that there’s Heaven? Because you get to know yourself? …Like who you are from lots of angles over time even if there’s not reincarnation.
I have a feeling your kids know life goes on after death. But…it’s still weird to die. So I’m glad you’re hopefully doing better.” says Lacey.
“Why is it weird?” asks Prince William.
“Because I don’t think people are supposed to be that separated from the people they love.” she says Lacey. “For one thing.”
They think.
“Is there more to it than that or is that most of it?” says Lacey.
“Interesting thought.” says Prince William.
“I don’t mind death. If there’s an afterlife. …It’s so damn painful.” says Harry.
“Yea!!” says Lem. “I wish I was alive in some ways right now. And then part of me wishes we could all just be in Heaven together.”
“Yeah! He’s right.” says Tom.
“I’m worried about all of you.” says Diana. She’s praying.
“Thank you, mum!” says Princess Kate.
Diana smiles lovingly.
“Awkward as heck!” says a reader.
“Why?” asks Dr. Billings.
“Because…you’re writing this all on a blog!?!” says a reader.
“Why not? Doesn’t everyone want to know everything anyway? …And then…why don’t you care?” says Lacey.
“I agree. I think it’s kind of nice!” says Bill Gates.
“You’re writing this on a blog!!” says a reader.
“Yes!! Aren’t you happy?” says Lacey.
“I am!!” says a Russian perfume collector.
“Yeah!” says another Russian perfume collector.
“She’s just telling the truth. What’s wrong with that?” says another Russian.
The reader who’s female looks uneasy.
“Why is it bothering you!?” asks an Englishman.
“Because it’s…not…typical.” says the woman.
“I thought you all loved that sort of thing.” says the recently deceased Tom.
“Umm… So you’re all just over it. Of this is real…you’ve all been pushed too far.” said the reader.
“To some degree…yes.” says a Rockefeller.
“Dammit. People are…totally exhausted.” says the reader. “Kate I’m sorry if I had anything to do with how overwhelmed your body became somehow.”
Kate cries. “It’s my life. And my family. But it’s not easy. I’m extraordinarily privileged. And I’m thankful. But…I am under an extreme amount of stress. Especially if this blog is based on an actual Illuminati.” says Princess Kate.
“Yeah! See…I feel powerless. But…you’re experiencing the same thing in an opposite way maybe.” says the reader.
“Thank you for your empathy.” says Princess Kate.
“I’m sorry! Please just get better!” says the reader.
“Kate. Did you get a bbl? Or a bad haircut?” asks an English guy.
“Neither!” says Kate.
“She’s just wear a wig.” says Lacey.
Kate nods.
“Yeah. That’s true.” he says, sounding concerned.
“Please keep doing your job! And that’s to take care of yourself!” says Diana to Kate.
“Yes! Please!” says Sir Winston Churchill.
“Why would I shoot myself over a butt lift?” asks Tom.
“Was it because you’re dangerous?” asks Lacey.
“Yes.” says Lem.
“You poor thing.” she says to Tom.
“I’m a danger to myself.” says Tom.
“Then why did you do it!??” asks Putin.
“He’s a gossip.” says JFK?
“A gossip?” says Tom.
“Yes. He told everyone about Kate’s disease.” says JFK?
“Which is what!?” asks Ireland.
“A saggy, aging butt.” says JFK?
“No! Her butt looks fine.” says Prince William.
“I’m not JFK. I’m just filing in.
Actually…no. Your butt looks fine. I’m just being silly.” says some dead guy.
“No. I’m not sure I was…right to kill myself. But I did.” says Tom.
“Why did you do it?” asks Mathew Nesheim.
“If I did…it seemed…so sane.” says Tom.
“I felt it made sense too.” says Matthew.
“Well…no more Canadian wildfires for you all.” says Lacey.
“We don’t smell the smoke.” says Tom.
“She knows that.” says Matthew.
“They must affect you somehow.” says Lacey.
“She’s right. They did.” says Mary Richardson.
“Alright.” says Tom.
“Are you okay!?” asks Princess Beatrice of Tom.
“Yes. I just feel silly being dead.” says Tom.
“Why do you all declare your deaths?” asks a reader. “If you can manifest so well? Why??”
“Because we do die. …And it’s honest. And we care. Or did. …And we can’t manifest that well.” says Tom.
“Why do any of you question death as the end??” asks Jonah Wiley.
“Because we’re trying to be safe. And scientific. And completely honest.” says Bill Gates. “And it’s extremely scary and overwhelming.”
“Lord willing I am doing better.” says Princess Kate.
“Take your time. Russian troops are not going to come get you. …My midwife-My wife is sick too. She says not to worry. You’re gonna be alright sweetie!” says Joe Biden.
“Thank you Joe!” says the CIA.
“Why did you have to be named Joe?” says Joe Kennedy Junior staring at President Joe Biden.
“Hey! That’s not nice!” says Joe Biden.
“Do you have Alzheimer’s?” says Joe Kennedy Junior.
“Maybe.” says President Joe Biden.
“Then why don’t they let you step down!?” says Joe Kennedy Junior.
“I don’t wanna talk about it!” says President Joe Biden.
“Oh. Okay. I hear ya.
Say…what’s it like?” says Joe Jr..
President Joe looks sad.
“You’ll be fine again you know?” says Joe Jr..
“Yeah. That’ll be weird.” says Joe Biden.
“This will all seem like a dream.” says Joe Jr..
“Yeah. I hope. I bet.” says Joe.
“It will.” says Joe Jr..
“Hey. I’m Tom.” says Tom Banks to Tom.
“Yeah. I’m Tom too.” says Tom.
“Things will get real interesting when Joe I. dies.” says Bud Abbott.
“Exactly. I can’t figure out why they did that.” says Lacey.
“They felt it was disrespectful to name him Joe II.” says Bud.
“Bud-But…Joe I seems grim.” says Lacey.
“I actually agree!” says Joe Jr..
“Yeah. But he wasn’t your son.” says Joe II.
“No. But…they decided to use the name. So…they should have just used II.” says Joe Jr..
“I agree.” says Louis Vuitton.
“It’s just…less…sad. And I hated sad. And…you carried on the name!” says Joe Jr..
“So I’m Joe III.” says Joe II.
“That suits you!” says Ted Kennedy.
“Shoot!” says Bobby Kennedy Senior.
“At whom?” says Bud.
“We’ll I’m already dead. So nevermind me.” says Bobby Kennedy Junior.
“If you mean me you’ll have to shoot my whole family.” says Lacey.
“There’s only four of you.” says Bud.
“But…the rest are harder to aim at than me.” says Lacey. “It’s not that I’m fat. It’s that I’m tired. And they’re often far more energized.”
“Nobody is going to shoot at your family unless God ordains it.” says Bud.
“You could shoot at me.” jokes Princess Kate.
“No!! We’d miss you far too much.” says Prince William.
“Yeah. And there are what? 52 other people we’d have to shoot at too?” says Bud.
“I could nuke you all?” says Tsar Putin.
“But then there’s nuclear waste. And that’s sad for the birds and whales.” says Lacey.
“Yes. True!” says North Korea. “One has to always consider such things.”
Lacey nods.
“Well…you’ll just have to do another joke.” says Bud to Bobby.
“Bud…I should have named my son Joe II.” says Bobby.
“Are you serious!??” says Joe Biden.
“No!! That’s not a joke! Sorry.” says Bobby.
Joe Biden nods.
“I just messed-up. Joe really does prefer Joe II.” says Bobby.
“Well. Lacey should get sleep!” says Princess Kate.
“Yes! Thank you.” says Lem.
“Are you really the King of Scotland?” asks Princess Anne.
“Yes! If I was ever Emperor Constantine. If I wasn’t…I’m hopefully as helpful as I can be. And…that’s all I can say. …God has His hand on your country! He loves a nation devoted to Him.” says Lem. “And say what you will…that was a premise. Even if it wasn’t me…many men died to honor God holding or wearing the Union Jack. …It symbolizes God to Lacey. And I can’t think she’s the only one who feels that way.” says Lem.
“I’d rather have died in Great Britain than lots of other places.” says Tom.
“Like where?” asks Tom Banks.
“Oh! If there’s reincarnation…I’d bet Lem died in Belgium or…close to it.” says Tom.
“That’s why I hate Belgium. If there’s reincarnation. I’ve always had an eerie feeling about it. …Or maybe someone else died there.” says Lacey. “If there’s no reincarnation in the Bible.”
“Yes! And now we’re done. Goodnight!” says Lem.
“Goodnight!” says Tom.
“Goodnight!” says Joe.
“Goodnight!” says Joe.
“Goodnight!” says Joe.
“Goodnight!” says Joe.
“Goodnight!” says Joe.
“Goodnight!” says Tom.
“Goodnight!” says (another random man named) Joe.
Keen to Cross the Pond 