“Lacey’s Day in 2015” by Lem Billings

Do you know Casi, did you find her impressive or not? What did you actually think of her? No, let’s have a real conversation about it.

Let’s go through a typical day in Lacey‘s life and find out what you actually thought.

You lied and acted like she was beneath you potentially, a lot of the Perfume community did but let’s have a real conversation about it and see what you actually think.

“Yeah!” says a reader from March 2024.

Oh no, stop lying. I rebuke those spirits of deceit in Jesus’s name. You’ve got to actually hear the truth, dammit.

The Kennedys often have an incredible hold on their lives with spirits of deceit. That is a family issue for them. So they were attacked Lacey with that, possibly her whole life. They had huge issues with the demons and spirits of dishonesty and deceit in their family. Tom Banks had possibly some problems with that as well, but not nearly as much potentially he was a very different person.

So she’d wake up-

We’ll put her in Seattle or would you rather she be in Saint Paul? Do you want her to be in Saint Paul or Seattle in 2015?

“Seattle!” says Jan Hertel.

Alright! What month?

“October!” says Jan.

OK they might’ve moved in October but that’ll work. OK. …Actually we’ll have to make it the beginning of November just to be safe because that could get very confusing for you as a reader. Do you care if they’re moving in or do you want them to just be settled, settled in?

“And I think, moving in would be best.” says Jan.

Alright, that’s going to get confusing, but we’ll do our best.

She wakes up at 9:30 AM in the morning and a king suite room in downtown Seattle.m

At the time it was probably a higher range hotel, but this was about eight years ago almost 10 years ago yeah about nine years ago so things change in 10 years in a city and hotels. She’s actually slightly disturbed to find the hotel she stayed isn’t as high ranked as it was at the time. At the time it was probably the second or third hotel in the whole city on TripAdvisor traveler ranked.

Her son slept in a rollaway bed or something like that her mother was with them. She didn’t know her mother was a nutcase. She either had a separate room or she slept on the sofa on a roll out, bed or something like that so her son had his bed her mother had a bed and Lacey and her legal husband slept in the king bed And they were there for two or three nights at most because that’s how her husband books things he never anticipates how things are going to happen ahead of time and it actually really irritates Lacey. He always seems to think things are going to work out far easier than they do, but he booked that room for three nights or two or three nights for when they first flew into Seattle so they had a nice king suite at a nice hotel at the time it was maybe 150 a night or 115 maybe 200 tonight And then the night before they had ordered chocolate because she was tired and they just had gotten on the plane so he ordered her probably a drink as well because she was drinking at that point she had fallen down the stairs, so no they had room service already and then we went to bed And then that morning she woke up. No hangover. Lacey hasn’t gotten a hangover in a long time. She has a very almost close, personal dear relationship with alcohol. It’s almost weird her relationship with alcohol is bizarre. It’s almost like if alcohol was an entity that it’s like a family member to her. She’s never really had a problem with alcohol. It’s almost been protective of her And I she doesn’t get hangovers. It’s just she doesn’t get hangovers. Her hangovers are barely hangovers. It is actually far worse to deal with what she feels this morning being tired, and having fallen down the stairs two or three years ago, but so some mornings with her neck it is difficult than her head, but hangovers no, not a problem, she likes she drinks her gin well then Hazley has wine occasionally has beer but no it’s she’s just it’s like they’re just great friends heard alcohol just absolute bodies, good memories and then she thinks that’s not right I’m sorry dear God, but no it seems as though they’re very very close.

So she woke up looking gorgeous. What did her hair look like? Probably not that great. She had stopped doing as much to it but it wasn’t terrible. It was pretty am I mean it looked amazing by a lot of people standards but I am so then she use their hair products are at the hotel at her skin care was expensive at the time, it was probably Chanel Chanel 10. Really at and I think she might have been using a Tata harper brightening serum so that’s we’ll just we’ll just give her about $500-$2000 and skin care products in the morning or not exaggerating. It was probably around yeah three to $500 at the time, so I’ll just say thousand dollars and skin care products so she woke up in that bed use $1000 worth of skin care products on her face and then her husband ordered room service. I have a feeling she ordered eggs Benedict with grapefruit juice and potatoes, my catch-up, and then he got scones. He took the kids and they went out and got pastries at a local to local delicatessen or that was a duck dozen at a local pastry shop in downtown Seattle so he went and spent so I don’t know $30 on pastries and lattes for him and Lacey and the kids and then she already had tea and coffee or something or do you know not to eat and coffee she doesn’t do that so she’s not ridiculous in Bridgewater, so it was T and eggs, Benedict and potatoes with ketchup And you’re a great fridges she prefers grapefruit juice am so great for juice and potatoes, eggs, Benedict and her tea or coffee. I think I might’ve been tea or or sometimes to save money. Her husband will just order her breakfast and then he’ll say will wait and I’ll go get some. I’ll go get a latte, I’ll go get a latte at a local local coffee shop or a pastry shop that I think you have even gone to a local French pastry shop in Seattle. He has excellent taste he was raised very well. I am so so he brought back some good French pastries and lattes for him and her arm and she was gets half calf. He gets fully caffeinated he’s not quite as Philly. He prefers to just get espresso but she gets the latte half calf and no the pastries were quite good. Very flaky really good there’s good pastries that morning. What is it might even been an apple and apple turnover or something like that or was it something more French but it was very good.

And then they either stayed there that night and so they her and her mother took the kids and you know read stories talked with them actually it was just her son at the time so he ran around the room. Literally he’s was very active so he was running around the room Possibly hiding behind furniture yelling about some thing probably literally giving his opinion about something from him very certain opinion very certain opinion about something that’s unclear it was that it was very serious and you’ve should’ve listened.

He looks like me slightly, so no I’m sorry I’m quite proud of my son but now he was very active. He had very serious opinions and it might’ve been about brown bear brown bear, brown bear, and Eric Carle buck it might’ve been about brown bear, brown bear, and Eric Carle book, but he was going to tell you about bears standing on top of a pillow, no standing on top of a cushion from a from a pivot, the sofa, a roll out sofa, so there might’ve been a roll up sofa cushion on the floor he was standing on top of it and he was going to tell you, he was going to tell you some thing about brown bear paw brown bear by Eric Carle that you should listen to and dammit if you don’t listen, that’s your fault.

So no, he wasn’t. He’s not a heartless little kid, but you were supposed to have listened in a very British aristocratic way. You should’ve listened because he had something to say about brown bear that was of a post importance to any reasonable three-year-old.

No that’s my son with Lacey jacket nothing to do with it and she’s not Jack. He’s very British actually and I might be quite British. That was Lacey but no no he was. He had a lot to say he really he’s very he’s very intelligent brown bear was there was some thing he did that needed to be said.

Oh so but no, Mark brought back lattes and remember he is three and he’s not as serious as Lacey, so Lacey might have held you in her captive audience at three and terrified you with her intelligence that’s not quite our son it’s more have a British gentleman can sometimes keep your attention, but his head might shake and you might think this man doesn’t know what he’s talking about his head shaking too much but then you realize that he really doesn’t know what he’s talking about and you should probably listen because it’s very important.

I am but anyway the point is Mark brought back a latte and espresso for him what are you what to order? We told her that for her day so far.

$600 in 2015.

About $600 in 2015 and it’s about 11 o’clock in the morning.

Oh, I don’t know why Jan picked this day, but he did.

And then what happened while they they had to get lunch they may have ordered room service again for another $70 will say him or 100 maybe so they spend about $100 at lunch or they might’ve gone out and got some thing in an order room service as well so they spent about 100 $120 at lunch and then Mark did some work on his laptop. Lacey got ready for the day and we’re not including make up her make up for another $200.

$900 at 1 pm in 2015.

So then at 1 PM at 1 PM Mark looks around at local apartments and he finds one in Seattle for $3000 a month in 2015. Oh, and they will except him the money that he has coming in the end because they weren’t anticipating to have to deal with us. They thought they had a townhouse in Ballard they thought they had a townhouse in Ballard that they were going to rent for like $2400 to $2700 a month so it would’ve been yeah $300-$600 cheaper a month And Ballard, which would’ve been preferable to an extent. but the woman didn’t like Mark. She met him and she was either antisemitic or she just didn’t like him. She just decided that she didn’t like his personality. He seemed pushy and arrogant to her because Mark is from Connecticut and people in Seattle are often times potentially at times assholes and I don’t think it was necessarily, I don’t think it was necessarily racism or antisemitism against Mark. I wouldn’t rule it out but I think it was more that he had an attitude with her of superiority because he is socially superior to her and was and it’s just who he is and so he came in looking like a wealthy person to her, possibly and it pissed her off, and so she refused to rent to them because she was pissed off by them. She thought they were annoying people because they were too aristocratic and pushy for her taste. He’s from Connecticut Casi he’s East Coast. You’ve heard about people live in New York how they’re pushy Mark is like that at times he’s not rude, but he’s not some sweet little asshole, you’ve probably never met someone like him maybe and had a conversation with him I don’t know almost your entire life I know he’s do you grow up in the Bronx either. He’s from a nice area to some degree of Connecticut and he lived in a middle-class house is father is wealthy I mean what the fuck do you want me to say to you I I lived in New York a lot of my life she’s like that too. He’s like that there, they’re New Yorkers and away Casi and so am I to some degree that’s not native to me it’s not needed to Lacey and tell me it’s not entirely native to Mark but he grew up in Connecticut so so they have kind of an attitude right and that’s just who they are so the woman didn’t like it it wasn’t antisemitism. She just thought he was an asshole, and she refused to rent to them. At the last minute they had packed up all of their stuff, shipped it off in the truck, flown out to Seattle and the woman’s like nope not gonna run to you fuck you and she had a right to do that.

Oh, but Lacey is Lacey there they are so much New Yorkers so they’re just like what whatever but other upper class so it was just like we’ll just fix it and he dead and she might even knowing that and that’s why she chose to screw them over and be a jerk because she knew that they could handle it and it just made her feel better to be an asshole to them because to some degree that Seattle people there are possibly very spoiled and self indulgent are they were 10 years ago and they still might be Because they’re so down to earth because it’s just Seattle but they’re not really that down to earth and so it’s kind of obnoxious but they don’t know that because they’re just from Seattle it’s not New York City.

So so so they, so I was straight by the way a lot of intellectuals, listening or having a very hard time hearing that and they make up bullshit using demons and dead people who are confuse I know I was straight and I still am, but the thing is so lazy and I don’t know what to do because a lot of these people are very New Age and ilumiNATTI and they cling to their demons thinking that their people and it’s sad to us because they need people and then it’s like who are they talking to times does demons but they don’t know that they get confused about stuff like that so then what are we do but there are people who care about that, but maybe not the demon Jose were talking to her about that.

That’s so so they so they are so they were in Seattle him so they were in Seattle. She spent $900 by 1 PM and then they found a $3000 a month apartment to live in in lower queen and which Lacey loved the name, lower Queenanne with a lovely day so it was lower Queenanne $3000 a month and it was a brand new apartment building literally was brand new they were the first people to live in their apartment so everything was new and it was $3000 a month. How nice.

So he took her to see the the the apartment maybe around three or four they drove there and he had to go get the car that was him that that was him. It was a rental car I think so then that was another hundred to $200 right there and then they had to get the car out of parking which was another $50-$60 so we’ll just say we’re around the 1200 now at 4 o’clock, and yeah I’m sure he gave them a down payment of or some sort of a hold on the roof. I don’t know maybe another thousand or something or 2000 so we’ll just say they spent about $5000 by 7 o’clock so they spent $5000 by 7 o’clock dinner everything included OK so bye-bye 6 o’clock they spent about $6000 And that was their day and of course in her head she was thinking how am I going to decorate that place? It was gonna be fun because it was so sunny and they had a rooftop view of the Puget Sound. It was gorgeous and they could see the space needle it was a beautiful view fire pits on the side of the roof a party room that was very nice with a pool table and cable TV. It was a brand new luxury apartment in downtown Seattle in 2015 so pretty good pretty decent right I mean not amazing but it was nice that’s how she saw it was an amazing place but it was a nice hotel or a nice no not a hotel. It was a nice apartment in downtown Seattle for $3000 a month, how nice living a bit of a middle-class life in downtown Seattle and a nice nice nice apartment I think she would’ve preferred to have owned a place but that wasn’t what they were doing at the time so it was $3000 a month for a luxury apartment and clean and decent enough I am spent $6000 by 6 o’clock That’s including dinner him and the other hotel room that they moved into in Ballard it was being stayed in by some football team of some football team. I think the Seahawks were in the hotel with them so it was an Oza luxury hotel. Of course it was his are all luxury hotels Probably four-star again and and so she was worried because it was to her. It was a shit hotel. It was a four-star hotel where bunch of football players were staying with them sweaty football players, and she vastly preferred her a little boutique hotel where they could get French pastries in the morning and she thought it was very depressing to have to stay in the sweat hotel Ballard.

And then there’s some bisexual men gay men may have just shut up or less the conversation those the ones that are more like Niles. The actor probably just shut up and think this is actually quite interesting if he was actually straight, and some other like nails are capable, and so actually, I’m entertaining the idea a lot of that in his generation are brainwashed into thinking I was gay, but some of them like that actor are smart enough to know that I might not have that and I actually find it. Fascinating just is theoretical conversation to even think about but no he they would stay would say well yes, he might’ve been straight. We don’t think so, but then again, we don’t know so it’s fascinating to them because they’re actually intellectual and then there are some gay men who are just like no he was gay and they shut up because they’re convinced that it eventually be out of that I was gay and then bisexual matter like what the fuck of course he’s not gay his wife is hot as hell ditzy and blonde and in her 30s you seriously think he’s gay!?

And that’s where they get along with men who are the actor from Frasier, but they don’t get along with other gay men at times or they just laugh at that because they think they’re stupid.

And then desperate Jack became confusing because he acted gay but he was bisexual so that’s where Lacey wasn’t there to say from the 21st-century say no he’s mostly gay, so he acts more gay than straight sometimes in his thinking but he’s actually bisexual so the people who are intellectual like the actor from Frasier, who played Niles is Jack’s very confusing even to read Faye because it’s like no he seems gay no, he’s not but that’s because he’s mostly gay, but he actually is bisexual. I know the sudden Lacey wants tabouli.

Oh, I don’t know where that came from but all the sudden she wants tabouli.

I didn’t ask for gay men go or maybe love wasn’t gay maybe he was straight and they can handle it so I’m good then like the actor from Frasier and Niles they’re like oh that is weird that she wants to believe what’s mine are but then the gay men that are stubborn or like what the hell what the hell And then that’s where the bisexual men become kind of jerky because they start laughing at the game and for being so stupid because we’re like how do you guys not get it he’s arousing her because he’s aroused he’s not gay and they’re just like oh my gosh, some gay men are so fucking dumb. Why do you think she’s craving tabouli, like it’s lame. OK he’s aroused. He’s trying to feed her to bully. I don’t know what the hell they’re doing but he’s not gay but they’re still but these bisexual men are still somewhat gay, so they still have an in on the subculture at the very least and they’re a little bit lordly and condescending about things at times other people but they’re just like whatever big game that are so fucking stupid because they don’t get it. He just wants to screw his wife that’s why she wants to bully you dumb ass is another not necessarily standing up for Lacey. They might accidentally be doing that but then they’re not even standing up for her. They just thinking people are fucking idiotically and they’re laughing at you for real.

Later.

And so then so then so then that was the day in the life of Lacey what did she spend? Well yeah about $5000. She had gourmet food and stayed in two four-star hotels in Seattle and Ballard. No not Ballard no no no no no we’re wrong it’s not Ballard the woman didn’t have it they will wasn’t even in Ballard, how OK it was not Ballard it was a Bellingham. I think it might’ve been Bellingham just a second.

No, it was. It was a townhouse in Bellingham, and it was a four-star hotel in Bellingham to so.

No and her cousin it either owns $1 million house this pointers or brands our house worth over $1 million who lives out there now who is married to Jess yeah at least he can’t tell if they owned the house or through renting $1 million house but they live in $1 million house because that’s how everything so expensive I am and it is hard to tell if they own it or if they’re renting but They either own $1 million house and my gosh that’s expensive or they’re renting it and no I mean that this isn’t a class statement because she has relatives that own million dollar property sweetie all over Seattle that they have an electoral college vote in that state did you know that her family voted in the electoral college in Washington state where Seattle is which is why she was moving to Seattle because that’s where her family lived and does still live there very important politically in the state of Seattle. They’re in the upper class and they’re old money. Could she have met Bill Gates? Yeah if illuminati had had a brain, they probably would’ve introduced her to Bill Gates but his wife was threatened by Lacey and he’s too shy and stuffy and bourgeois.

And his wife’s very threatened by Lacey she’s very pretty and his wife’s not as pretty more smart or as well brat where is going to be person so she’s very threatened by Lacey that being said, what would you expect? He’s so much new money and he’s very shy and bourgeois he finds her incredibly attractive, but he he’s not a solid enough person to really pursue it in a mature way, which could actually make his wife. Wonder if she’s still in love with her or you very well might be, but that’s their problem.

So what do you think? What do you think of her day Casi are you impressed? She spent dozens of times what you spent every month and your rent in one day. How about if we do another day, maybe another day would make you feel less threatened by her, and then you suddenly be better than her again, right even though you never were and you’re insane, potentially have ever thought that.