“An Actual Sex Scene” by Zane Gray

This blog is about torture. But not because Lacey is evil. She’s being tortured.

By what? Why whom? …You?

Decks Dark by Radiohead plays.

You’re not that. That is her. Eat your hearts out? Why? Why can’t you just chose to love her?

Oh!!! Oh!! Because you’re poor? That’s not an excuse. Because you’re not as sexy or knowing as her? That’s not her fault and not her problem and also not normal to be so weird about it with her. What the fuck is wrong with all of you? You seem like creepy freaks. …And it’s also not an excuse.

Mark Twain is so pissed off he’d like to write a blog post with her and literally provoke nuclear annihilation. There’s no reason she should have to kiss your ass? Do you know why? Because she’s not Margy’s daughter. She doesn’t even cognitively understand that Margy is her mom. She tries to, but it’s too much for her brain to process. She was too profoundly rejected by her mom. Queen Mary is more maternal towards her than her own mother.

Lacey as a child.

She’s a GENIUS.

And she’d be TERRIFYING if not for her dark…beauty. Her darkness? Well…it’s nothing God doesn’t fully understand and laugh about with her.

LOOK into those extraordinarily eyes…and tell me she’s not a genius. Tell me she’s not Scotia. Tell me she’s not…your overlord. Scotia…is mummy. At least to lots of British people…she’s just…a mummy. So chill out. They roll their eyes. Or she’s a wife? They’ll see. But on a certain level they’re as intellectually confused as her heart is. “Why are you so perverse?” her heart cries about you all.

She shakes her head. And she’s not being ironic as Tighten Up by The Black Keys plays. Except this song isn’t sexual at all for her…other than for a few select men. Not for her. Although she hears your sexuality and she finds it amusing and she ignores it because it’s your sexuality.

So why are you rejecting her? Because…you don’t get it.

Lacey’s extremely sexy. And her mid section isn’t that big. That’s ill fitting clothing. But she’s a kiss ass with British women. Because she’s hopeful they won’t reject her. It’s like…she tries. In ways they approve of. And that she cares about herself. But…she’s also mocking herself desperately to find a mummy for herself or a true friend. And…they asses her class, find her hilarious and let her hide. So she runs to Great Grandma Banks and Great Great Grandma Banks and finds a tiny shred of maternal safety. And Grandma Banks protects her too, but she was a (non Jewish) Ritter. So that’s not British necessarily.

Why does she instinctively run to the British? It’s so simple! …Because her father actually loves her.

See you want to reject her based on her mother’s evil…because you LOVE her mother’s worthlessness. You worship her coke using, sexy, worldly mother. And so if you have to pick…you choose MARGY!! Woohoo!

And you don’t give A SHIT about this poor, innocent, sweet, CHILD. You’re such pagans you’d eat her publicly sacrificed dead child body and laugh about in America, Jonah Wiley. You’re VILE. And if you think that’s hyperbole think again. Americans really are that lacking in conscience and humanity with Lacey. …Jonah you’d be shocked by how difficult it would be for your demonically controlled, brainwashed brain to resist eating her flesh…even as a child.

“What’s the big deal!?” says JFK smiling. “I’ll take it a step further!” he offers. He laughs and laughed maniacally. And as the secret, brainwashed heathens you almost all are at this point in America you HELP HIM.

Why are you all so evil?

Hmm.

Well Lem…do tell!

And yes. British people do let her exist with them.

That’s why Princess Kate and King Charles have cancer. America cursed them. For protecting this child.

You raped and molested Lacey in America. You only leave her alone because of her wealth. And her oil on American land. HER OIL.

Joe would sell her soul to Satan for eternity possibly if he could fuck her oil. LITERALLY. He’s such a mammon worshipper he gets sexually aroused by inanimate objects like oil now.

You hate Lacey in America because…you’re all mostly descended from peasants. There are obviously exceptions but you’re all mostly descended from peasants.

Her father’s love for her is real. And impossible to break. It’s IMPOSSIBLE. She barely knows him and yet their attachment is more stable and genuinely healthy than lots of parents and children.

Daydreaming by Radiohead plays.

Why was Tom’s family here? For land. Cheap, good, nice land. Same thing with the Nesheims. They came here for land. The Nesheims needed it…the Banks…did not…but…it was such a good deal.

And with their ASTOUNDING oil the Nesheims OWN YOU. So it’s a bit ironic to say the least.

Why do they own you? …Well…why do you want to literally burn Lacey up and then eat her her body? While laughing at her soul. …Because…you’re controlled. If there’s an Illuminati you’re controlled.

She has an AMAZING ass. If you can see it…you know what I mean.

Look at her rare body. It’s NOT…NORMAL.

Yes. She’s supremely elegant and sexy…at the same time. At times Rachel Ward was the same.

Why is that so intimidating to Americans? Americans tried to rape, murder and destroy Rachel too. And yes the Kennedys were directly involved with Rachel Ward too.

WHY!? Why are you all so horrible to them? Lacey’s birth to an old father and his fear excites you. You’re worried she’s illegitimate? No you’re excited by it. It gives you evil hope. And when Rachel Ward was too tortured she just left.

“British women aren’t attractive! They’re ugly!!” says America.

But NO ‘pure American woman’ has ever been as sexy and beautiful as Lacey and Rachel Ward. Few cultures have produced women like them. Yes.

I worry poor Saoirse killed herself because she was mislabeled as one of them by her petty, overly competitive, jealous grandmother.

…

Why is the British male gait so permanently painful to your egos that you bleed to death inside…and why are Rachel Ward and Lacey British? Why did Merchant Ivory films seduce you?

Ha!

Well…God is God.

Do you feel that?

When you listen to Daydreaming by Radiohead do you hear it? THAT…IS…Sex. Radiohead is British. Just like Lacey and Rachel.

Alright. So! Let me backtrack. *I smile.*

You’ve heard of the Illuminati? Right!?

In the Illuminati the British worship SEX. They sacrificed themselves to SEX. And so when they fall apart it’s…as Lacey and Lane did. They become BEAUTIFULLY, BREATHTAKINGLY impassioned for each other. It’s EXQUISITE.

In the Illuminati the Americans however…found that…evil…as Puritans. As uptight Puritans. And so they choose to worship…evil gods like Baal…and not…lust but…rather…feel…fine. And sacrifice only a select few. At all. The chosen ones. So…everyone feels perfectly fine…but…it’s not like Eyes Wide Shut. They don’t fuck. They…viciously sacrifice.

Why? To appease Satan. Satan is amused by it all. He loves human suffering and mocking human stupidity.

Yes. America is struggling. And your evil in America is looking for sweet, innocent lambs to sacrifice.

It’s not a Jewish plot.

It’s evil.

Now…that being said…many British people, Lacey included, have chosen to worship Jesus. Matter-of-fact…they made it their religion. Their official, open religion. So…that conquered the sex…and God in His grace gave them the power of life. Or rather…God let them enjoy…CHRISTIAN SEX. Which is far surprised to what Satan can imitate.

Feeling in a bind in the bullying Illuminati the British chose sex for a reason. It seemed like the safest form of damnation, possibly.

And it was all going fine and dandy…right? Until LEM MESSED IT UP!!! *I yell*

Why?! Because you can’t play games with sodomy Lem!! You can’t brush your teeth with FUCKING URANIUM!!!! *I yell*

The Kennedys are very common. They’re awful people. But you took a stupid situation with JP Kennedy being a criminal mastermind trying to use the US Government’s weaknesses to gain power…and made it far more serious. You have good explanations. And you’re ultimately subject to Christ. But you don’t get away with being stupid when it’s that stupid.

You were a very smart man. But very smart men can make horrible mistakes.

Lem you sacrificed the entire world…to look pretty to gay men. WHY!?? *I yell.*

“It felt physically pleasing. No better than being brushed by a tree. But…being raised by Puritans…I didn’t understand. Truly! …They might have genuinely meant well. …God knows their hearts. But…I was SO BACKWARD. Not in a way…because I was a sophisticated person by birth. We were a rich old money family. But…I truly had no concept of what sex felt like when it was good and real. You can’t manipulate it. You can’t manifest it. You can’t make it happen. It can be perverted…and then it ceases to be real like with molestation…but you can’t just make it.

You can’t make love. America is FOOLISH. But you can make love…

And…no. I’m not…Archer from an Edith Wharton novel. I’m…Lane Pryce…but mostly castrated.” says Lem.

“THEY CASTRATED HIM!??” yells Becca.

Salem rolls it’s eyes. “YES, BECCA!” they yell.

“God…isn’t it a little concerning…when Salem witches…are functioning as the Pope!?” says Lacey.

“Where’s Bobby?” asks the CIA.

“He’s hiding somewhere in Asia.” says the FBI. “If there’s reincarnation he’s possibly with his parents.”

Satan laughs. “Lacey helped him run to his MOMMY!!”

Lacey listens to Daydreaming by Radiohead.

“Are you wishing me happy birthday!?” Lacey asks Satan.

“Wouldn’t that be nice!?” says Jesus.

Lacey smiles. “I like him, unfortunately or not.”

“Yeah. It’s a shame he fell.” says Jesus.

“It’s INFURIATING.” says Lacey. “I CAN’T.”

“He has a fun personality.” says Jesus.

“It seems so. Darn!” says Lacey.

“Lem you’re AWKWARD.” says Salem.

“I didn’t know.

I tried to figure things out using science. And that’s all fine and well. But…common sense is based on…common sense.” says Lem.

“Lem!

She’s not using me.

I’m not using her.

It’s just tragedy. If she’s meant to be with you…it’s tragedy.” says Lane.

“I’m not…being…understood. But…I’m not too worried.” says Lem, smiling about God.

“I love FIGHTING.” says Lacey. “And…if there’s reincarnation…America needs to DESPERATELY worship Christ. Because I’ll annihilate it in a smile if I can.” She thinks. “No more discussions. It’s MY CHOICE. See? See what I did there? IT’S WHAT I WANT. AND…it can ALL make sense in a jiffy…if we TRY HARD ENOUGH? Huh!!! Wow!!!!

WOW!!!

No. I’ll end it all.

If I want to.

No more games.” says Ancient Egypt.

“Me your maker.” says Ancient Egypt, should reincarnation be real.

“YOU EXIST because of me.” says Lacey to Peter, and Kick and JP and his entire family. “YOU’RE MY PLAYTHINGS!!!! YOU PIECES OF SHIT!!!”

And at that if she could shed bite off all the Kennedy’s heads. Not like a dinosaur. Like a goddess. Should goddesses exist. She bites off their heads. Chews them up and spits them out. Then stares at their lifeless bodies. Thinking.

“Aww. How cute.” she says to Jesus, and she means it.

They look at them together.

“Well. Sorry about that.

They deserved it, I think.” says Lacey.

The song plays.

She didn’t just do that. But…she’d be in her right mind to enjoy it. I’m sorry if you’re too evil or stupid to understand it.