Eric: So apparently Right-Wing, Red Pill, conservative men have been trying to attack Lacey by attacking Bobby in an area where he can be triggered, in his psychology, so that he’ll attack Lacey.
The idea is to torture her and get her to finally admit that the Illuminati is powerful in a way that she’s not, because that was the point from the very beginning. They made an enormously significant spiritual “gesture”, to egotistically attack her. 
If they fail…the safety of the Illuminati, as a coven, is in peril. The fact that you’ve been hearing all of their secrets on TikTok is actually because they have been failing, slowly but surely for a decade. 
*Later*
A male Gen. X reader: Why are we attacking Elliott Roosevelt’s wife?
Listen to “In The End” by Linkin Park.
Rachel Maddow: They don’t understand…actual female liberation.
A female Gen. X reader: What??
Rachel Maddow: She’s his actual equal. In some…real way. …And…they just don’t get it. Or…perhaps…they don’t accept it, as a reality.
Listen to “Numb” by Linkin Park.
Another Gen. X male reader: I’m lost-
They actually don’t understand!?
*He looks shocked.*
Rachel Maddow: *Nods, laughs and smiles*
Another Gen. X male reader: Oh my!
*He thinks*
What do they think is happening!?!
Rachel Maddow: They think that she is stupid and backward and that she doesn’t understand anything and that she oversimplifies pretty much everything. Absolutely everything. …They think she’s a phony intellectual.
Another Male Gen. X reader: *Almost cries*
Have they experienced any real romantic love in their own lives at all?
Rachel Maddow: *Looks upset, possibly anguished, possibly disdainful.*
You tell me.
Another Male Gen. X reader: No.
Rachel Maddow: *Shrugs*
*Later.*
Pete Hegseth: SHIT!
SHIT!!!!
Iran: What’s wrong? Why is he feeling so scared?
Dubai: He’s worried about a civil war. If Lacey can understand Rachel Maddow…as a woman…why can’t Minnesota just be a part of Canada?
Putin: *Rolls his eyes*
How does this stem back to Bobby? I’m sure it does.
Pete: I don’t think I can tell you.
Putin: Why are you protecting him? Like he’s the Holy Grail.
Listen to “Skyfall” by Adele.
Bobby: Because…I am the Holy Grail.
*He’s serious*
Donald Trump Junior: Not Lacey?
Bobby: Yes.
*He’s deadly serious*
Pete: Gee.
If I had an ass and tits!?
*He walks off in a huff.*
Lacey: And if I had a man’s body?
*She cackles*
Pete: *Looks worried*
What did I just do?
God: You gave Lacey…Banks…the spiritual authority of a man. At least. Through your Satanism. She also has the same identity. So…she’s extremely powerful now.
Why did you tactically do that?
Pete: I was being a Satanist…-
*He cries*
Listen to “Apologize” by One Republic.
Lacey: I may decide to start a civil war. If necessary.
Iran: *Nods and smiles*
Lacey: Yes.
It’s becoming quite a bother.
Iran: Why are you talking like the 1800’s Earl of Rosslyn?
God: I’ll have to explain.
Iran: Well, sir.
Be careful.
Lacey: I shan’t be a burden. Don’t fret.
*Later.*
Bobby: Pete is making me tell you that this all started because I insisted that I was the Holy Grail.
Iran: And of course, if there is reincarnation, Lacey is the Holy Grail. All that it would be is essentially ancient Egyptian holiness, sanctified by Christ. Through reincarnation. I didn’t say that right. It would be an ancient Egyptian holiness because the pharaoh was probably holy like a priest in a way that we don’t comprehend nowadays. I get it. But I think most people do not. So her father was a very holy man, and the view would have been that somehow Christ preserved that when he redeemed her and so each time she’s returned, she has maintained that power through Christ.
So that’s why the Rosslyn family has the Holy Grail and then they ruined it because they decided to take her out of their history books because they weren’t holy enough. It’s also possible that they are working on it and they’re still claiming to have her just very precariously.
So essentially the holy Grail is the wife of Constantine the Great. And because she’s the holy Grail, she’s as humble as Jesus, in a way.
That makes complete sense to me Lacey as a Muslim. I don’t think all these people intellectually comprehend it, just so you know.
Marsie: Bobby, how could you be the Holy Grail???
Bobby: Oh! *He tries to blink seductively, to lure in Lem.*
How could I be the Holy Grail?
*He laughs, like he’s absolutely silly.*
Well!
*He blinks seductively again*
Elliott: HURRY THE FUCK UP, WOMAN!
You’re ANNOYING AS HELL!
Bobby: OH FUCK YOU!
*He says, almost normally.*
Elliott: *Laughs at him*
Bobby: OH FUCK YOU!!!
*He falls apart in tears*
Elliott: *Laughs at him*
Where’d you pick this shithole up? The circus?
Marsie: No. That’s immoral.
You can’t say that!
This isn’t real.
…You don’t feel that way.
Elliott: Feel what way?
Marsie: That’s right.
Keep saying that.
*She beams in, witchy pride.*
Elliott: No. Say what!?
Feel what!?
Marsie: You can’t be…that…mean.
Elliott: Why?
Marsie: Because I won’t allow it!
Gosh, no.
It makes me sad.
Elliott: *Smiles*
Do I look like a man who would give a shit, about your feelings?
Marsie: No.
*She smiles*
Elliott: *He nods*
So why can’t you cognitively comprehend that?
*He laughs*
I’m the one who’s mad. Right now. Not Lacey.
Marsie: But you’re evil and wrong. You simply can’t be that mean!
Why…it’s not allowed.
Elliott: My FEELINGS…IN MY OWN FUCKING HEAD…ARE NOT ALLOWED!??
*He looks shocked*
Marsie: Oh my goodness.
Let me seduce you.
I’m a sexy woman.
*She tries to twerk.*
Elliott: I’m not interested.
Please stop.
Marsie: You don’t want me?! Why…that’s preposterous!
Bobby: It sure IS! I’d fuck you any second!
He’s dumb!
Marsie: And you’re hard to get.
Your approval?
Wow!
I must be HOT.
Bobby: Yup.
It’s a big deal. Having sex with me is damn near impossible to do.
The CIA: What’s your number, Bobby?
Bobby: 1,115.
The CIA: Seriously!?
Bobby: What?
Marsie: Well!
The statistics?? The chances?
I am special.
Bobby: I don’t even want to calculate how low the chances of having sex with me are, as a human.
And that’s why I’ve slept with over a thousand people.
As a good will gesture.
I’m saying, “Hey! It’s okay.
*He shrugs*
I’ve got a lot of love to share.
If I haven’t slept with you, you can just blame science. It’s not me! I’m not uninterested.
*He shrugs*
Gee. If you were near me…I’d probably fuck you. So if I haven’t had sex with you…don’t take it personally.”
*He smiles*
And everyone loves it.
They always have.
Gee.
I’m a nice guy!
And that is why I’m the Holy Grail.
Because I…never say no. To anyone. Ever.
Ireland: That’s swell!
Gee.
…How many illegitimate kids do you have?
Bobby: Dozens?
I don’t keep track.
They ain’t my problem.
Ireland: Then how are you holy?
Bobby: Because I ain’t never hurt no one’s feelings by refusing to share my grail.
I keep it holy.
Ireland: Wow.
Gee.
How’s that holy?
Bobby: It’s-
Because I don’t hurt people.
Marsie: Yeah.
That’s real kindness.
Aww.
*she grins and nods*
Casi: I guess Lacey is smart. I didn’t like that so I just ignored it…because I feel like I’m smart.
Marsie: A bunch of us girls who are real women cause real women are dumb as fuck and shallow and petty and stupid and worthless as leaders because we’re cracked-jp idiots, got together and decided that Lacey was being mean.
Bill Rheayer: I thought she was mean too because I told her she was beautiful once, when I was drunk. And I thought it would suffice for the rest of her life, if she was ever trying to evaluate herself as a woman.
Marsie: You told her she was beautiful when you were wasted?!?
Bill: Yes, but I do give out compliments, even when I’m drunk. And I thought that she was obsessed with me and obviously would instantly understand that.
Marsie: Even if that’s true? Do you understand how common it is for men to give out compliments when they’re drunk?
Bill: I didn’t think that through.
Marsie: I have a feeling she took it seriously, but with a grain of salt because you were wasted.
Casi: So people just tell her that she’s hot all the time because she is that good looking in person and then they expect her to suddenly flip a switch in her head and get something?
Pete: We’ve doubted every eyewitness testimony that she’s hot that we’ve ever encountered, because we don’t wanna believe that she’s good-looking. She has a normal level of doubt, maybe a little more than most people, but it’s not extreme.
Casi: Are most of you idiot savants?
The Illuminati: Hope not.
Casi: Okay.
I presumed that she was a bitch. I thought for sure there had been some guy who she had played or some woman and that she just was an absolute asshole. I didn’t think it was possible that someone could be that pretty as she probably is and just be totally hurt by people. I just didn’t think it was possible.
And to be honest, even when I see people on TikTok, who claim to be as pretty as her, they aren’t.
But then that’s where I think you guys actually are dumb. Just because something doesn’t fit with what we normally assume doesn’t mean that you can just shove it into a little box and make a ton of assumptions and I think you guys did that with Lem and I think you did that with Lacey, I think you guys do that with like everybody and everything.
OK, so she’s never been a bitch to anybody!???
The Illuminati: Well… there was a guy who was an asshole who used to go around, saying to people “I hate fags.” who was trying to go on a date with her, and she turned him down because she thought he could be a closeted homosexual. 
Casi: Is this real?
The Illuminati: Yes.
He’s pretty much the only instance of her ever turning someone down who she probably could’ve actually married, but he just kept saying “I hate fags!” and it was weird and creeped her out so she didn’t think he was a safe person to go on a date with. 
Casi: You’re making that up?
The Illuminati: NO!
That actually really happened.
Casi: And every other guy just wasn’t really attractive to her or there was something amiss?
The Illuminati: Yes.
Marsie: So she’s never actually been that loved by anybody alive ever other than her dead dad and her kids and maybe somewhat her husband?
The Illuminati: Correct.
Marsie: Did she understand what she was even saying?
The Illuminati: Yes?
But I think what she needed was somebody to explain to her that it wasn’t going to work because no one would understand what she was trying to say. But we isolated her and made it basically impossible for her not to make some sort of social mistake.
And instead of committing suicide or admitting that we’re better than her she told everyone in the perfume community that she was old money, and we gradually begin to dismantle all worlds structures instead of just admitting that we were wrong.
Marsie: Why can’t you just admit that you were wrong?
The Illuminati: Because those of us involved would have to give up all power, possibly be killed and a lot of other stuff that’s bad for us personally. So in our own interest, we’ve chosen to just keep biting the bullet.
And that’s best case scenario worst case scenario Satan hates us and we don’t go to Hell and we can’t go to heaven and I don’t know what happens. 
It’s not as crazy as you think. If you’d seen some of the stuff that we had have seen, you would understand why we’re scared shitless. 
Marsie: So… you’re worried about being stuck in like a black hole for eternity by yourself with like no chance of any sort of happiness?
The Illuminati: Given the shit that we’ve pulled and the babies that we’ve eaten, yeah pretty much.
Marsie: So… how are you? OK at all?
The Illuminati: Well… I think we keep thinking that if we can just prove that we’re like Satan and we can get away with shit because we’re smart enough that he’ll be impressed and still wanna be our friend.
Marsie: You guys actually start to believe your friends with Satan?
The Illuminati: Yup.
He is incredibly beguiling or incredibly cool, depending on how you look at it.
Ireland: And still trying to figure out how exactly it is Bobby, that by being a promiscuous slut, you’re holy? 
Bobby: It’s kindness.
Ireland: But you’re getting something out of it.
Bobby: Yes. Which is how it’s of God. Because that’s the mystery of salvation.
Why are we getting something out of it?
Ireland: But promiscuous sex isn’t actually holy.
Bobby: And that’s what you think. 
I’m not a Catholic anymore. I am now a Born Again Christian.
Ireland: Huh.
So you’re not worried about the sacraments or the sanctity of marriage at all?
Bobby: No I still take that seriously and I mean if we’re being honest, we all know that I’m really just a Catholic-
Ireland: You just said you were a Born Again Christian?
Bobby: Well can’t you be both?
Ireland: But you just said it in such a way that you indicated you were really neither.
Bobby: No, I’m a Christian.
Ireland: *Looks scared*
This blog can’t be real.
Bobby: Stupid people.
I don’t understand what the problem is.
These people are very dumb.
I open up my butt hole. I opened up my legs. I open up my arms. I open up my mouth. I open up my eyes.
I open up my soul to anyone who is interested in having sex with me.
God: But sex is supposed to be more than just that Bobby.
Ireland: That’s what I was trying to say!
Bobby: But you couldn’t say it because you’re smarter than God. I completely understand. 
God: So Bobby and answer to my question that I asked, not Ireland. What exactly do you have to say to that?
Bobby: I’m sex positive your majesty of Heaven.
God: I see.
So being sex positive instead of negative, means that you don’t believe sex is sex?
Bobby: I don’t understand what you mean by sex.
God: Well, typically, when people have sex with someone it’s special to them. They don’t do it very often with very many people. Some people, preferably actually, just do it with one person for all of eternity.
Bobby: And what say you Sir, to the children who are currently being molested? Are they inferior sexually?
D
God: They are not having sex Bobby, they’re being molested. And believe it or not those are actually two very different things, so they have nothing to worry about.
Bobby: You seem more like a top than a bottom to me, with all of that commanding energy, which is fine. It’s just I hope you understand that I give a special sort of gift to the world. What I offer makes everyone happy. I’m happy other people are happy, everyone’s happy when I open up myself.
God: I am God I don’t have human sex.
Bobby: Then I don’t know how to even conceive of you. Because everything I know, everyone I know, has sex. There ain’t nothing off-limits no more. And that’s good because that’s what makes us exist.
God: That is not true.
Do you have an actual understanding of sex that you’re hiding from me or is this the level of understanding that you actually have?
Bobby: I do not possess a deeper understanding at all.
But I think I’ve been profoundly honest, candid, thoughtful, and deep.
And I would challenge you Sir, to match me for a second. 
God: Oh, I have matched that. I also created you.
Bobby: I’d like to see you prove that you’ve created me, using science.
Listen to “Hot Blooded” by New Constellations.
Arnold: He doesn’t even exist Bobby, don’t worry.
Bobby: I don’t know what you’re talking about Arnold. I’ve trapped him, using logic.
God: At the moment, I would have to use the human brain to explain it to you scientifically and there are not humans available who understand it well enough to explain it to you. When you’re dead, I can explain it to you scientifically.
Bobby: OK, you’ve got me.
So for the moment science cannot explain that you exist. But did you know that?
God: Yes, I did.
Bobby, what is sex like for you?
Bobby: It’s great!!!
God: What does that mean? 
Bobby: It means what I just said. It means that it’s great.
God: Can you explain that a little bit more?
Bobby: It’s like an itch. You know? It’s just kind of like an itch?
Which is why when I twerk…it’s like my body is going, “Hey, scratch me. I’ve got an itch!”
God: So that’s what Twerking is to you. It’s a way of indicating to the world that you’ve really got an itch? Badly?
Bobby: If I don’t put that information out there no one‘s gonna know. It’s like posting something on a bulletin board in a community. You gotta find the community and you twerk. And you just hope that someone sees your little post-it note and goes, “Yeah OK! I can help this man!”
And to be honest, I found lots of helpful people over the years who’ve been more than willing, and I can’t thank them enough.
God: So it’s just an itch to you?
Bobby: I mean, what else would it be? It’s just like shitting.
Of course it’s a little more fun than taking a shit. Although, I can’t say that exactly. I’ve had some pretty bad experiences over the years. 
Sometimes I prefer the physical experience of peeing to having sex.
But it’s like an itch and you just do a little twerk, do a little wink and you find someone who’s interested in, I guess, scratching your itch. And that’s pretty much all there is to it.
I’ve never really made a woman orgasm almost ever. I’ve had some orgasms, but they’ve never been that good.
And that’s fine. I just tell myself what I miss in quality I make for quantity. I’ve never been able to figure out how to have an orgasm that’s not good or give one. It seems like it’s very psychological and very complicated.
God: That’s definitely not how I created sex to be experienced, Bobby.
The Catholic Church: Really? Are you sure there’s sex in Heaven, because it seems to me like we don’t do that kind of thing in Heaven. We just are happy. 
A woman in a bad marriage: I don’t understand.
There’s something different than what I’ve already experienced?
I thought I was an expert, given the high-level of knowledge that people have about sex these days.
Matt Weiner: I thought that I captured some brilliant sexual moments like when Don Draper tickled Bobbie, with a feather.
Or when he used to roll around with any number of attractive women who were desperate for him.
Tie people up, give them a little pleasure and bing bang boom. Hot diggity!
God: There was no good sex in Mad Men. The entire series is sexless in that way.
A reader: Do Americans understand sex?
God: Yes, and no. To be honest, you’re all mostly descendants of peasant and unless if you were dirt poor, you probably never really experienced good sex.
The problem with the fallen world if you weren’t poor and somewhat either careless or stupid you never really felt safe, truly enjoying sex because people got pregnant. And if you were homosexual, it was illegal. 
Some people did experience it who were even middle class, but it was actually pretty uncommon because it just wasn’t something that was easy to come by.
So unless if you’re the descendent of a noble person or a wealthy person in Europe or elsewhere or you were poor, it’s very likely that you don’t have any DNA understanding or cultural understanding in your family how to actually enjoy it.
So the problem is that America intuited that in the middle of the 20th century.  And because of that they ended-up making worse.  They became insecure they tried to fix the situation. They tried selling people sex. And this is not something that is commonly known anymore, but it used to be talked about. 
But you can’t fix the problem that way, and because of that people have become almost insane because it’s actually incredibly dangerous thing to mess around with.
Bobby: Huh.
So I don’t think I have any sort of problem. I think I just have an addiction.
Listen to “Hot Blooded” by New Constellations, again.
God: How is an addiction not a problem?
Bobby: Because I’ve kicked other addictions, and you know that.
God: But what are you addicted to?
Bobby: *Thinks*
Sex.
*He sniffs the air, thrusts his arms behind his back, and tries to look sexy.*
God: I’m not going to have sex with you, Bobby. But I’m still trying to understand what it is that you’re experiencing.
Bobby: Who are you? Lem Billings, her father or a demon?
God: I’m thee God. Like God of the Bible, God. 
Bobby: Nah!
*He chuckles*
There’s no way!!! That’s awesome!
God: Yeah.
For real yo.
Bobby: Cool beans.
God: So… Bobby, what is it that you think you’re accomplishing when you have sex? 
Bobby: I mean, it’s just a natural sort of process.
God: Wow.
Do you experience intense pleasure physically, and psychologically, or is it just pretty mediocre on a scale of like drugs and scratching your own face?
Bobby: To be honest with you I prefer doing drugs.
But I kicked that and I replaced it with sex and I just don’t really think about getting high. And that’s hard for me, but I give myself credit every day for being incredibly brave . 
God: Did you know that for someone who’s having it the right way, nothing is as good as that?
Bobby: No. I thought that was just clever marketing.
God: No.
Bobby: Okay.
Well, I guess I’m Bobby and Ethel’s son. I’m not JFK. 
*He laughs, embarrassed.*
God: Jack was actually worse than your father and you both.
Bobby: *Looks sad*
I was afraid you were gonna say that, but I’m not gonna lie. I enjoy hearing that.
God: Your father and your mother were very blessed and very in love and to be honest that’s a lot of information, but you needed to know that. Your father defiled himself by not leaving your family and taking care of himself and his kids and his wife, like a man. 
He was better at being a man than Jack and Jack was incredibly jealous of him. And he was an idiot and a coward, and instead of taking care of himself and defending himself, he let your entire family walk all over him.
And you kids suffered, and I have had to punish him.
If you die, and you don’t want him to be your father anymore, I’ll support you on that.
Bobby: Thanks.
God: I’ll say the same thing to all of your children when they die. 
When Tatiana died, I said it to her. Same thing with Saoirse and Maeve. I offered them new parents and protection from all of you.
You have a criminal family, Bobby. I don’t think you understand that.
You’re grown-man, but you have the emotional maturity of about a 10 year-old. And some of that is your fault but not completely.
There is so much more to life than what you’ve experienced. 
China: It’s okay!

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