A gay man: Look at me!
*he prances around*
Is that sexy?
Lacey: What do you mean?
A gay man: DO MEN LIKE THAT!?
Lacey: I doubt it.
You know what’s better?
Okay. Just relax. Don’t put on an act!
A gay man: *does that*
Lacey: I think another gay man would prefer that.
A gay man: *smirks*
I KNOW THAT!!!
Lacey: *Looks hurt*
A gay man: I have a very loving boyfriend.
He’s said that I look “sinewy”.
Lacey: You do!
A gay man: Okay.
But…I can’t handle that.
Lacey: Handle what?
A gay man: First of all, you’re being so nice. Considering you don’t necessarily know what to think about homosexuality in the first place. And second of all…I can’t handle how you’re-
I have such low self-esteem.
I’m sinewy!??
Lacey: *Blinks*
Yes.
A gay man (in his 20’s): No. I can’t.
I can’t handle it!!!
Lacey: Why?
A gay man: *Thinks*
It’s too…-
As sinewy as I may be, I’m never gonna be as hot as you.  And I know that because I’m not delusional.  And so I can’t enjoy the compliment. 
Lacey: So I’m supposed to walk around carefully, not wiggling my butt, never wearing high heels ever never wearing a tight skirt and just being incredibly careful that no one figures out that I’m attractive?
A gay man: No you’re supposed to be dead somewhere in Russia in a gutter fucked to smithereens by Vladimir Putin.
Lacey: I hear you.
That’s the thing that people aren’t being honest about. I do look more fertile but close today are so risqué and so it’s like putting Marilyn Monroe in a bodycon dress and then lifting up her tits? Like, that’s too much.
And yet I mean, it’s totally ridiculous. But it is too much to ask of people. 
And I’ve gotten very confused. You are actually the only person ever to just say that to me.
A gay man: Yeah, I think you were supposed to be some sort of exotic dancer in his house and he was supposed to sleep with you and leave you for dead.
*he rolls his eyes*
Lacey: I could pretend to be that person- But it doesn’t work- Actually, I can’t. I could, but I can’t at the same time.
A gay man: But then you just be dead and then would’ve had to watch and he probably deserves it because that would’ve been somewhat acting, but according to him, that’s what he was doing.
Lem: Yes, except it wouldn’t be entirely acting and that’s what I- I can handle it but it’s painful.
