One of Casi’s biggest fans: Okay.
But Lacey is a mean girl.
Okay!?
Because she knew our Casi was different. She’s not normal. …Okay!?
*he thinks*
And…why did she do…what…she did…if she’s so damn nice!?! …NO WAY! …If it’s so obvious Casi is insecure…then how would she not know that she basically hates herself!?
Yes! Our Casi…hates herself.
I take pity on people like that. I don’t go around telling them off. Especially when they’ve been nice enough.
A reader: Even if they’re being weird as hell!?
You can’t just copy someone’s actual soul. And then go around claiming it’s your soul. …I’m pretty sure Casi did that…
Lacey: …I don’t think I understood that she hated herself.
What does that even mean, anyway? To hate yourself? …Are you just feeling guilty?
One of Casi’s biggest fans: No! It’s not just guilt.
…It’s when you actually hate yourself.
*he thinks*
Do you hate anyone!?
Lacey: No.
How can you truly hate a person? How is that even possible?
Casi: Okay.
It’s just the emotion of hate!?
Lacey: *Lacey thinks*
But that’s a horrible thing to feel for a person!
A dead member of the Greatest Generation: We didn’t struggle with hatred of people, nearly as much as you think. Actually, World War II caught us off-guard, because we didn’t hate people as much.
Lacey: Okay…so…she hates herself?
One of Casi’s biggest fans: Yes…
Lacey: WOW.
Yikes.
*thinks*
Yeah, I didn’t know that.
Casi: I thought everyone was insecure!
Lacey: I’m not.
Tom: I wasn’t either.
Lacey: Some people just aren’t.
Casi: *looks confused*
*thinks*
HOW WAS IT NOT OBVIOUS I HATED MYSELF!??
Lacey: You reminded me of Tallulah Bankhead.
She didn’t hate herself. She was just…difficult.
A gay man: YES!!!
Or Joan Crawford.
Joan Crawford: *laughs*
I didn’t hate myself…
Casi: Okay. That was a persona.
Lacey: Entirely?
Casi: No.
Elliott: We can’t tell. I can’t see it either.
If she was my daughter or granddaughter, I could tell. But otherwise? No.
Joan: You’re just different!
One of Lacey’s neighbors: Casi, are you just a narcissist? They can dysfunctionally both love and hate themselves.
*later*
A reader: So…how is Lacey evil?
I’m starting to think she was just crucified.
Lacey: I didn’t understand that Casi hated herself.
What difference does that make!?
Elliott: YEAH!
…I think…it’s like they…feel…more vulnerable.
Is that right? *he asks God*
God: Yes, they are more vulnerable. It’s easier to make them feel incredible despair.
Lacey: But she feels hot!?
*she looks confused*
God: Yes. But she also thinks she’s dumb. And overall, she hates herself. …Not just, “Oh! I hate myself!” in some flippant way, either. She actually feels self-hatred.
Lacey: *laughs*
I’m sorry. I’m trying to take this seriously…but I’m so traumatized. *she laughs*
WHY WOULD YOU HATE YOURSELF!?
*she laughs*
God: Because there’s something wrong with you. That’s one possibility. You could also…want approval and never get it…
Those are two examples, but there are more.
A Catholic: You’re a liar!!! *they yell at Lacey*
Lacey: No. I’m really not.
*she thinks*
Hmm.
Another Millennial: What’s it like? For us?
God: What would it be for a Millennial?!
Like if you were genuinely accused of being pure evil because you forgot someone’s birthday.
Another reader: Casi, you were trying to find something wrong with her. Weren’t you?
Casi: Yes!
Fine! Yes, I was.
